See You Around
by EternalSorrowOfAngels
Summary: Jane Shepard doesn't do people. She has no real objection to them but something doesn't quite click when she communicates with others and so she prefers to blend into the background. But maybe there's someone out there she doesn't have to try so hard with... F!Shep/Garrus Pre-ME1 to Post-ME3 Complete Sequel In Progress - Finding Me
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: So, the Garrus/Shepard romance annoyed me slightly because it is a great set up but it wasn't as great as it could have been in ME2 (although, admittedly, it was pretty awesome in ME3). Pretty much since I played it the first time I've had a vague idea of how I thought it should have played out and when I wrote it down it evolved into this monster so enjoy!**

**Also, I have started sketching a scene from each chapter on my Deviant Art page. Here's Chapter One (just remove the spaces): ****deviantart . com** /#/d5c2085

**Female Shepard: Paragon/Spacer/War Hero**

**Disclaimer: Bioware put in all of the hard work and created the awesome characters and the world, I'm just messing about with them.**

* * *

**Chapter 1**

"Jane, are you okay?" Hannah Shepard asked as she approached her daughter.

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" Jane didn't look up from the book she was reading. Hannah sighed silently as she read the cover: 'Advanced Mathematics Volume VII'.

"You haven't left the ship since we docked a week ago."  
"Yes I did. I went shopping just after we arrived." She still didn't look up but, rather, took a pencil and jotted an equation down in her notebook.  
"For two hours."  
"I got everything I needed. There's no other reason for me to return." Jane left the textbook alone in favour of her notebook and omni-tool screen. At that, her mother put her foot down.  
"Jane Shepard! Look at me when I talk to you. You're being rude." Jane shut down her omni-tool and looked at her mother a little sheepishly.  
"Sorry."  
"Jane, I'm worried about you. It's not healthy for a fourteen year old to spend this much time cooped up on a starship. Why do you not want to go outside? You could be making friends right now instead of solving math puzzles."  
"I don't want to. Plus, it's not a 'math puzzle'." Hannah sighed as her daughter brought her knees up to her chest and pushed her glasses up her nose.  
"Jane, whatever it is it isn't having fun and playing with friends. Are you really not going to tell me what's bothering you?" Jane shook her head before something clicked in her mind.  
"You already know. You just wanted me to tell you."  
"Yes, I had hoped that you would trust me. I saw footage that a local law enforcement officer was kind enough to send me. She wanted to know if I wanted to press charges."  
"What did you tell her?"  
"That I would talk to you. Now, would you kindly explain what happened?"  
"She came up to me while I was reading and asked what book it was. I told her and she got angry."  
"She got angry because you told her what book you were reading?"  
"I think she was being sarcastic. She called me names."  
"So what did you say?"  
"Nothing. I got up to come back here and she pushed me. She knocked the book out of my hands and then punched me." Jane refused to cry as she retold the story. This was why she hadn't wanted to tell her mom, she would worry.  
"Jane." Her mother groaned. "You could have blocked that punch easily. Why didn't you?"  
"Most blocks would have hurt her and the ones that wouldn't, would only lead to an escalation. I let her hit me and she moved on. No harm done."  
"Except to you." Jane shrugged as she fiddled with her ponytail. No matter how many times she explained it, no one understood her logic. "What am I going to do with you?" Her mother asked, shaking her head. Jane didn't answer but instead returned to her notepad and the things that made sense.

* * *

Jane held her glasses in front of her as she leant on the railing of the balcony, overlooking the wards of the Citadel. The seventeen year old didn't really know what to do without them, they had been a part of her for as long as she could remember and now she didn't need them. She was half tempted to just remove the lenses and wear them anyway. She smiled, she had never been to the Citadel before. She was only here now because both of her parents had shore leave and it seemed as good a time as any to get her eyes fixed. And now here she was, unsure if she should cling to her old identity or use this as an excuse to create a new one. Her mother had talked about her getting a haircut, maybe she should. She was still trying to decide what to do when she heard a scream coming from an alley behind her. Before she knew she what she was doing, she had ran towards the noise. Now she was facing a batarian and a human boy, both just a little older than her. Behind them was a young human girl who was maybe thirteen years old. She looked terrified and Jane worked hard to keep her own fear from her face.  
"Hey!" She yelled, surprised at the strength of her voice. Every second she looked into the terrified eyes of the young girl, her anger flared brighter as it fueled her need to protect her. That was when the batarian boy pulled a pistol from his side and her anger became soaked in fear. She hadn't thought that they might be armed. She could take two unarmed guys by herself but there was no way she could disarm the boy without getting shot.  
"Back off!" Her translator converted the boy's words to Human Common but Jane's brain couldn't register them. Her thoughts were occupied by her need to save the young girl, no matter what. She ran through all of her options in her head and began to feel her stress level rise as one after the other resulted in a high probability of fatal injury to someone. Eventually her stress level peaked as her desperation grew and she found herself charging at the two boys, her body surrounded by blue flames. They were knocked out on impact, leaving Jane close to passing out but she couldn't. Not while the girl was still so afraid.  
"Are you okay?" Jane somehow managed, trying to keep her voice calm and reassuring.  
"Who are you? Are you an angel?" The girl asked and Jane just shook her head, smiling through her exhaustion.  
"No. Just, thought I should help." With that she felt the remains of her strength leave her as a warm hand touched her shoulder and she passed out.

* * *

She awoke in what appeared to be a clinic, her head throbbing.  
"Where am I? Where's the girl?" She groaned, trying to wake herself up faster.  
"She's fine. You're in a clinic not far from where I found you." A flanging voice came from beside her. She turned to see a young looking turian (she had only talked to a few turians over the years and had never been any good at figuring out how old they were, but he seemed young) with silver plates and blue facial markings. He seemed... shy. So she tried to smile through her headache, hoping that the cultural difference wouldn't make her social awkwardness even worse.  
"What happened?" He looked a little nervous as he responded.  
"I don't really know that much. I heard a scream and, as I ran towards it, I saw you as you ran into the alley. I was still a while away so I got there just in time to see you biotic charge those two guys before talking to the young girl. Then you passed out and I carried you here and the nurse asked me to stick around." Jane couldn't help but blush at the part about him carrying her as he looked away sheepishly. Her mind was spinning with everything that had happened so she said the first thing that came into her head and didn't sound stupid.  
"_Thank you_." She said in Turian Common. She didn't know much (most of it couldn't be pronounced without a second voice box) as she had never really been anywhere with a high number of turians. Her Asari was much better. He looked away awkwardly. "Shit, I said that wrong, didn't I? I haven't really had much practise-"  
"No. It was perfect." He interrupted before she could ramble some more. She felt her blush deepen; she was really making an ass out of herself. "So, do you have a name?" Jane frowned at that. If she told him her name, they would contact her parents and they would worry if they saw her like this. She would have to stall for time, at least until she looked less like death, she thought as she caught sight of herself on the reflective surface of the counter near her bed.  
"I'm not telling you my name."  
"Why not?"  
"You'll contact my parents. If they see me like this, they'll worry." He gave what appeared to be the turian equivalent of a sigh as he folded his arms.  
"Fine. So, you're here with your parents? How old are you? I've never been good at human ages."  
"Same. Well, I mean, turian ages, obviously. I'm seventeen. How old are you?" She babbled a bit, surprising herself. She was normally very articulate. She self consciously moved to push her glasses up her nose, only to remember that they were no longer there.  
"Oh, I think these are yours." He passed her her old glasses, the lenses now cracked. Her five fingers brushed against his three as she took them from him and she felt a shiver down her spine as a faint blue light seemed to momentarily dance over her skin.  
"Thanks. I guess I don't need them any more. That's why I was here, on the Citadel. To get my eyes fixed." She hated that word; 'fixed'. Too many people had applied it to her in too many harsh ways. "So, you didn't answer my question. How old are you?"  
"Sixteen."  
"So, you're in the military, then?" Jane spent a lot of her time on the extranet, trying to learn as much as she could. Other cultures always fascinated her, almost as much (if not more) than maths and tech did, so she knew that turians were sent off for military service at fifteen.  
"Yeah. I'm on shore leave so I'm visiting my dad. He works at C-Sec. What about your parents?"  
"They're both military. I'm gonna enlist myself in a few months."  
"I guess being a biotic will help with that." She was caught off guard as she remembered how she ended up in the hospital.  
"I... Was it really biotic energy?" She asked nervously as she fiddled with her ponytail.  
"Yeah. I guess, I mean, it looks like you don't have an implant." He gestured to her neck and she brought her hand up to it.  
"No. I didn't even know. I mean, I've lived on spaceships my whole life so it's not totally surprising that I might have had eezo exposure but..."  
"I guess it would be weird to suddenly have new abilities out of nowhere and not know how to use them."  
"Yeah, that about sums it up." She smiled and thought to herself that maybe this wouldn't be so bad. "Thanks for cheering me up. I guess since I won't tell you my name, you won't tell me yours?"  
"Something like that." He smiled and she laughed a little, catching her reflection again. It didn't look so bad now so she figured it was time to tell her parents where she was. She stared at her reflection for a few moments before looking down at her glasses. Maybe she didn't need to completely reinvent herself. She figured anyone who'd risk herself for someone else didn't need reinventing. But, that didn't mean she couldn't leave some of herself behind. Hopefully, the more socially awkward parts of herself.  
"Jane. My name's Jane." She said as the doctor walked into the room.  
"Nice to meet you. I'm Garrus." They smiled at each other. "I guess I'd better get going. See you around Jane."  
"Yeah, see you." Jane's smile remained as she used her omni-tool to send her parents a message telling them where she was.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Commander Jane Shepard smiled at the memory of the last time she'd been on the Citadel. The only other time, really. Of course she had never been to the Presidium before. She just hoped that this visit wouldn't be as life changing for her as the last one. Naturally that meant that all signs pointed to it being even more so but she could still hope.

"Come on guys. We'd better head up to the tower." Shepard hated to interrupt their conversation but she didn't want to keep the council waiting. She smiled to herself as she realised how much she had changed since her last trip here. Shy little Jane had been left behind with her glasses and Shepard had been born. She'd always loved acting and had always been good at it so she'd taken on the character of 'Shepard' when she had to. It had been what allowed her to be seen as normal by her fellow squad mates and what had allowed her to take charge during the Blitz. Jane may have known what she was talking about but nobody would ever pay attention. People took notice of Shepard. Of course, she couldn't stay in character all of the time so she limited her interaction with others but since the Blitz people hadn't made as much of an issue out of it. They already had an impression of her before she met them and, as long as she faked confidence when she had to speak, she was pretty sure those impressions wouldn't change. She was still alone as she had ever been but she was now fairly certain that most of the whispers about her were positive. It didn't really matter, people always liked her it was just a matter of how long it took them. She figured, looking at the two human soldiers following her, that Ashley might take awhile to warm up to her but it seemed Kaidan already had. Possibly too much. He was nice, sure, but it was a little weird for her. Friendly banter she had learnt to cope with. Sincere flirting? Not so much. She smiled as her two squadmates chattered behind her in the elevator, thankful that they didn't try to draw her into their conversation. Finally they reached the top of the tower and Shepard let her eyes wander around the huge room, her eyes finally stopping on two arguing turians in front of her.  
"Saren's hiding something! Give me more time. Stall them." A familiar voice echoed throughout the room and Shepard's gaze came to rest on a young turian, around her age, with blue facial markings and a blue visor. It had been so long ago, she was sure it wouldn't be the same person so when his attention turned to her she regarded him like she would anyone else.  
"Commander Shepard? Garrus Vakarian. I was the officer in charge of the C-Sec investigation into Saren." She wasn't sure how common the name 'Garrus' was but the second his eyes locked with hers she knew it was the same guy who'd sat by her in the clinic all those years ago. Of course, he had shown no indication of recognising her and now was not the time for reunions.  
"Sounds like you really want to bring him down." She observed, falling into her 'Commander Shepard' persona.  
"I don't trust him. Something about him rubs me the wrong way. But he's a Spectre, everything he does is classified. I can't find any hard evidence." Shepard tried to hold back a smile as he folded his arms, just as he had when she'd refused to tell him her name.  
"I think the Council's ready for us, Commander." Shepard tried not to groan at this. If social interaction was difficult for her then politics was hell. It never made any sense to her and obvious solutions were often completely ignored for no apparent reason.  
"Good luck, Shepard. Maybe they'll listen to you." She gave him a doubtful look, allowing her mask to slip a little.  
"Yeah. See you around Garrus." She hoped that his time it was more than just a figure of speech.

* * *

The hearing had gone as well as expected. She couldn't blame the Council, really. Their logic was sound but it was infuriating to know the truth and not be able to back it up. She was pulled back into the conversation with Udina and Anderson by the sound of Kaidan's voice.  
"What about Garrus, that C-Sec investigator? We saw him arguing with the executor."  
"That's right. He was asking for more time to finish his report. Seems like he was close to finding something on Saren." Ashley chimed in and Shepard tried her hardest to bite back a smile. It seemed that fate was listening to her for once.  
"Any idea where we can find him?" Shepard tried to keep her voice neutral as she fought to not raise her hand and mess with her hair. Keeping herself in 'Commander Shepard' mode was already getting tiring and she had a feeling that the day had only just begun.

* * *

"Let her go." Shepard glared at the thug holding Doctor Michel. This was the time when 'Commander Shepard' ceased to be an act; when someone else was in danger. She felt her biotics surge around her as she drew her shotgun, running through all of the possible scenarios in her head. Then, out of nowhere, the thug collapsed to the ground with a gunshot wound between the eyes and Garrus walked out from around the corner. Shepard quickly charged into the group of remaining thugs, her biotics knocking them down so that her shotgun could rip through each of them in a matter of seconds. Then she turned to Garrus, biotics still flaring.  
"Perfect timing Shepard, gave me a clear shot at that bastard." Shepard's anger refused to dissipate as she ran through the odds of him hitting Doctor Michel instead of the thug. They weren't good.  
"What were you thinking? You could have hit the hostage." Her biotics continued to flare around her.  
"There wasn't time to think! I just reacted. I didn't mean to- Doctor Michel? Are you hurt?" Shepard's anger died down as she saw the flustered young man who had carried her to safety and stuck around to see if she was okay. Her biotics stopped flaring and she had to stop herself from smiling as she went over what had happened with the doctor. She was just about ready to say 'see you around' to Garrus one last time when he interrupted.  
"This is your show, Shepard. But I want to bring Saren down as much as you do. I'm coming with you!" Shepard actually did smile at that point.  
"You really hate this guy, huh?"  
"I couldn't find the proof I needed in my investigation. But I knew what was really going on. Saren's a traitor to the Council, and a disgrace to my people!" Shepard's smile widened. Finally, she thought to herself, someone who actually makes sense  
"Welcome aboard." She said before they decided to find the krogan at C-Sec.  
"Kaidan, head back to the Normandy. Garrus and Ashley with me." Kaidan looked a little dejected at that but left regardless. Ashley walked with him to the door of the clinic as Shepard found herself looking at her reflection in the counter. She almost laughed out loud as she realised that this was the same clinic as the one she'd ended up in all those years ago. Funny how thing work out...

**AN: So, I don't plan on repeating a lot of game dialogue (mostly because my OCD makes me want to get it spot on and that takes a while) but it was kind of vital here. Hope you enjoyed!**

**Also, the DA sketch for this chapter is here (remove the spaces and add .com): deviantart /#/d5c212r**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Garrus had been awake for an hour now but it was still early. Turians didn't usually sleep as much as humans so he was up before the rest of the crew and had time to kill. So he ended up fixing the lava damage the Mako got on Therum. He was about half an hour into it when he heard a voice ringing out from across the cargo bay. It sounded like singing. He pulled himself out from under the Mako, his translator struggling with the words.  
"Just about... shadows call... dare you to follow... my mystery...you are here with me... the waves with me... the heart I swear... my own... time that I've taken... it's not wasted... already tasted... one sweet love." He felt awkward as he got up and realised that the singing was coming from the commander. She had come down without him realising and was now equipping the lockers. He wasn't what to do since announcing his presence would probably freak her out. His decision was made for him, however, when he managed to knock over his tools causing her to spin around. Smooth Vakarian, he thought to himself.

Jane blushed furiously. Had he been there the whole time?  
"Hey, Garrus. I didn't see you there." She started to fiddle with her ponytail as she walked over to him.  
"Sorry. I didn't see you come in."  
"Did you, erm, hear me singing just then?"  
"Yeah..." Her blush deepened.  
"Sorry. It probably sounded awful. I didn't know anyone else was down here."  
"No, it's fine. I mean, it sounded fine. Better than fine. Sorry, I'm rambling." Jane had lifted up her hand while he was talking and he saw that in it she had a bottle of bright orange-red liquid. She drank it while he blathered on, her focus seemingly intent on the bottle.  
"It's okay. It's my fault. I'm a little... awkward and it makes others awkward." She ducked her head a little, her free hand moving to push her glasses up her face. She frowned. She hadn't done that in years.  
"You'd think after so many years you'd stop doing that." He said before he censored himself. He didn't think that she'd even remembered him.  
"Huh. I didn't think you remembered me." She voiced his own thoughts. "I guess I'll forever be the girl who passed out in the middle of an alley, huh?"  
"Nope. You'll forever be the girl brave enough to face off with two armed men in order to save a younger girl. I thought that was pretty cool." He found himself thankful that turians didn't blush as he admitted that last part.  
"Only one of them was armed." She stopped fidgeting so much as she leant against the Mako and he actually took a good look at her. Her hair was pulled back in it's usual ponytail and she was wearing a grey vest top with black joggers, both of which were very tight, and she was barefoot. She looked more relaxed now and less like 'Commander Shepard'.  
"Still. I was impressed. I guess I'll forever be the awkward young turian teenager, huh?" She smiled as she climbed onto the side of the Mako, finding a perch to sit on as he returned to fixing it.  
"Nope. You'll forever be the guy who carried me to the clinic and then stuck around to see if I was alright before cheering me up in record time. I figure most people wouldn't have bothered so that's pretty impressive in my book." She admitted, finally no longer feeling awkward.  
"Thanks again for bringing me with you."  
"No problem. I like working with you. You make sense."  
"How so?" She concentrated on drinking for a few moments as she thought about how she was going to explain it without sounding crazy.  
"Most people have their own thought process when prioritising targets and stuff. When I'm leading a team, I have to keep track of the decisions everyone else is most likely to make. Some people are easy to adjust to and some are difficult. I don't even really have to think about it with you, I just know which targets I should take down and which ones you will."  
"I just pick the target you aren't gonna mow down with that shotgun. I swear, talking to you like this you'd think you have a personality transplant every time you go into battle." She laughed at that, swinging her legs a little.  
"Yeah, I guess. Anyway, I'm glad you're here. Plus, it's nice having someone to talk to."  
"What are you talking about? You talk to everyone on the ship."  
"No. They talk to 'Commander Shepard' or the 'Hero of Elysium'. Nobody gets to know bumbling, awkward Jane."  
"Well, I like bumbling, awkward Jane. Plus, nobody talks to awkward, hot-headed Garrus either. They all talk to 'Officer Vakarian' and expect me to be like my father."  
"He was in C-Sec too, right?"  
"Yeah. He's retired now but everyone expects me to be like him."  
"I know what that's like. My mother is very... sociable. People expect the same from me and I can't quite manage it. I take after my dad too much."  
"He in the military too?"  
"An engineer. He's not great with people but he's smart. What about the rest of your family?"  
"I have a mother and sister on Palaven." They were about to continue their conversation when the lift opened and Wrex entered the room. Jane hopped down from the Mako and smiled.  
"It's been nice talking but we'll be landing on Feros soon so I'd better get ready. You should too." She turned to leave but then spun back around quickly. "Are you up this early every day?"  
"Yeah. Turians don't sleep for as long as humans."  
"My sleep cycles are a little off so I'm always up early. I might pop by here again. It's nice having someone to talk to."  
"Well, I'll be here. Your bad driving makes sure of that." He teased and she pulled a mock frown.  
"Careful Vakarian, that's insubordination."  
"Yes, Ma'am." She laughed as she left the room and Garrus couldn't help but smile. She really was one of a kind.

**AN: For anyone wondering Shepard is singing One Sweet Love by Sara Bareilles. Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"Did I break it?" Garrus pulled himself up from under the Mako to find Shepard leaning against it, her look slightly apologetic as she drank some of the neon liquid she was so fond of. Every morning for the past few weeks she had come down to the cargo bay and they talked as he fixed the Mako and she worked on whatever side project she had going. For the past few days she had been heavily modding her omni-tool and he found himself wondering if there was anything she wasn't good at. When he'd asked she'd just laughed and said 'making friends' which he'd countered with the fact that they were friends. He smiled a little at the memory as he stood next to her, a little curious as to why she was hanging around in the cargo bay in the afternoon instead of doing paperwork. She ran like clockwork every day and it was slightly unsettling for her to be changing up her schedule.  
"You always break it." He countered, doing his best to mimic an eye-roll. Jane had quickly picked up on Turian body language and he found himself using human gestures more often to get his points across. The thought was not lost on her as she smiled, partially at his joke but partially at his attempt to make communication easier, even though he didn't have to. She'd never been good at reading other people but she had never struggled to read him.  
"I mean badly." She hopped into the drivers seat of the Mako as he leant against the door.  
"Thankfully not. Although it was a close thing." Jane smiled as she brought her knees up to her chest. It was nice to have a friend. Of course, she had now grown close to all of the crew, she and Ashley shared a love of literature, Tali was the only one who understood her tech talk, Wrex was... well Wrex, Liara was almost as awkward and introverted as she was and Kaidan... well he was Kaidan, but none of them were as close to her as Garrus was. He was her best friend and the only one who really knew her.  
"Well, it didn't explode with us inside so my driving was successful." She joked, her smile widening as he smiled back.  
"'Successful' isn't the word I'd use. 'Not _completely_ suicidal' on the other hand..."  
"Laugh it up Garrus. I'll put you in the brig for insubordination."  
"But then you'd have no one to talk to. Plus, do we even have a brig?" She cocked her head in thought for a few moments.  
"I don't know... if we don't then we probably should." She said, thoughtfully, as she went to drink some more of the brightly coloured drink.  
"What is that stuff? You drink it all of the time."  
"This? It's not quite pop but not quite an energy drink. It's sweet like pop but with a kick to it."  
"How much sugar is in it?" She looked a little sheepish at that comment.  
"I'm a biotic, okay? I need a lot of calories."  
"Hey, I'm not judging. I just figured there were more efficient ways to get those calories." She sighed, pulling a face but making sure her eyes remained playful.  
"Okay, okay, you got me. It does help with keeping up with biotic demand since I've never been used to eating lots (I had a slow metabolism before) but I'll admit I do love this stuff and my mom used to never let me drink it because of how bad it was for me. She called it 'liquid diabetes'. Having biotics is just a convenient excuse to drink it all of the time."  
"Fair enough. What does it taste like?" She frowned a little.  
"Sweet but not overly so like other pop. You can try some if you want. I mean, if you're not allergic or anything." She offered him the bottle and he took it.  
"No, I'm not allergic to levo stuff so I should be fine." He drank a little and made a face that Jane knew meant he was thinking.  
"Most people prefer the sweeter flavoured versions but I like this one."  
"There are sweeter ones than this?" He exclaimed.  
"Yeah, my thoughts exactly. So, you don't like it?"  
"I didn't say that. It's nice but I don't know how you can drink something that sweet all of the time." She shrugged a little.  
"Some girls like chocolate. I like sweets that are 90% sugar and 10% chemicals." That was when they heard the lift to the cargo hold activate.  
"Spirits. Okay, shut the door and if it's Kaidan tell him I'm not here." Garrus' face plates shifted in a way she knew meant he was confused but he did it anyway. After a few minutes the door opened back up.  
"I told him you left a while ago. Did you say 'Spirits'?" Jane tried not to blush as she drank the end of her drink. They really were hanging around each other too much.  
"I heard you say 'for God's sake' the other day." She defended as he began to look just as flustered as she just had.  
"You're a bad influence, you know that?"  
"Only as bad as you."  
"So, why are you avoiding Kaidan?" She groaned as she put down the empty bottle.  
"He's... got a crush on me." She clenched her jaw a little in embarrassment and annoyance as Garrus gave her the turian equivalent of raised eyebrows.  
"So? The other women on the ship seem to think him... attractive." He wondered what exactly about this conversation was making his gizzard clench but he decided to ignore it. Jane groaned again as she leant a little closer to Garrus, causing his mouth to go dry. What was wrong with him today?  
"It's just... Kaidan's nice but he doesn't know me. He knows Commander Shepard. That's who he's crushing on. Honestly, by idolising me he's become the only person on this ship who doesn't know anything about me. Sure, he could tell you my service record and that I'm a nice person but anything else? He has no clue." Jane looked upset so Garrus placed a hand on her shoulder. He knew she hated saying anything bad about anyone else, no matter how small.  
"That's his problem. And saying it out loud will not make the universe implode."  
"How did you know?" She crossed her arms and tried to hide a smile.  
"I guess I just know you too well."  
"Maybe. But I don't think I'd want it any other way. I can't imagine you not being here, Garrus." She tried not to blush.  
"Good. Because I can't imagine not being here."

**AN: Okay, this will be the last chapter I upload tonight but if these two keep talking to me like this the next one will probably be up tomorrow. Hope you enjoyed!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Garrus knocked on the door of the commander's quarters for the third time. He was worried. She hadn't been down to see him in three days. In fact, apart from giving orders, she hadn't spoken to anyone. Ever since the events on Virmire she had completely withdrawn and it had he, Wrex and Tali worried. Liara wasn't as concerned, she said that the commander probably just wanted to be alone and that they should respect that. Kaidan and Joker, on the other hand, weren't even a little concerned. They pointed out that this was how Shepard acted before the three of them had joined up. He had reached the end of his patience so he used his omni-tool to hack the door. Surprisingly, it didn't take very long. As he entered he heard the familiar sound of Shepard singing.  
"A heart... a landfill... slowly kills..." His translator struggled to keep up so he just turned it off. He had to look for a few moments before he saw her in the desk chair, looking smaller than usual with her face in a book. Before he had the chance to say anything she snapped her head up and turned to him. "Shit! Garrus..." He didn't understand the rest of what she said but she didn't seem angry, just surprised. He turned his translator back on and frowned a little as he realised that she was wearing her glasses.  
"Sorry but I was worried." He explained, sheepishly.  
"Why?" Jane asked as she put her book down and he looked at her incredulously.  
"Jane, you haven't spoken to anyone except for missions since..." She sighed, leaning back in the chair.  
"You can say it Garrus. Since Ashley died." She raked her hand through her hair as she pulled her knees up to her chest.  
"I know you're grieving but you can't hide away." She looked a little defiant at that.  
"I am not hiding! You make me sound like a child." He found himself caught off guard as her voice seemed to change but he couldn't place it.  
"Really? Because this seems a lot like hiding to me." She groaned, shrugging a little.  
"Fine. I am hiding."  
"Why?" She gestured towards her couch and he sat down as she pulled her chair opposite him.  
"I find social interaction with others exhausting. Other people are like mine fields of emotions that make no sense. It's tough enough normally but at the minute..."  
"So, an actual mine field on an asteroid surrounded by batarians is no problem but a metaphorical one has you holed up in your room?"  
"Yes. It's what I've always done but I have been putting effort into not doing it recently because I thought it would be better to have friends for once. Well, I was wrong."  
"Are you seriously swearing off friends?"  
"Garrus, I can not pretend anymore. It's just too stressful."  
"So, don't pretend. People either like the real you or they don't."  
"Yeah, that line only works if some people _actually_ like the real you." He looked at her for a few seconds before leaning forward and holding her hands.  
"I like the real you." She smiled, trying not to blush at the feel of his hands on hers.  
"I know and I'm sorry. I shouldn't have shut you out but Garrus, this is about more than just me. If the crew doesn't trust me then I can't lead them properly and we won't beat Saren."  
"I don't think you give them enough credit." She smiled at that and he smiled back.  
"When did you become so full of hope and sunshine?"  
"I keep telling you, you're a bad influence."  
"Alright, okay. I shall try to be myself around the crew."  
"Good. Now I have a question."  
"Go ahead."  
"What is up with your voice?"  
"My voice? Oh, right, now I hear it. It's my accent."  
"It's changed." She sighed, finally getting off the desk chair and sitting next to him on the sofa.  
"This is my normal accent. I grew up on ships with my mom and was brought up by her and children's vids. The result of which is a posh, slightly british-"  
"British?"  
"An Earth nationality. All of the best shows for children come from there. Anyway my accent is posh british which sounds weird because my mom's from America so I say American words like 'mom'. So when I was old enough for school I went to live with my aunt and three cousins on a small colony world called Mindoir and the other kids made fun of my accent. Well, they made fun of a lot of things but my accent couldn't be hidden so I changed it. Or rather, it changes constantly depending on who I'm talking to. I don't even notice I'm doing it anymore."  
"That's..."  
"If you say sad I will punch you. It is what it is and it's left me who I am."  
"I wasn't going to say sad."  
"Then what were you going to say?"  
"Impressive. Now, can we change the subject?"  
"Yes." She smiled again, pushing her glasses back up her nose.  
"Why are you wearing your glasses?"  
"I get headaches sometimes when I read."  
"I thought you had your eyes corrected?"  
"I did but it's a psychological thing. Something about how expecting headaches when I read without glasses makes me get them. It's really dumb."  
"Well, I like them."  
"I like them too."  
"So, what book were you reading?"

* * *

Shepard woke up the next morning contented. It took her a few moments to realise that she hadn't slept in her bed. She sat up and an arm fell off her, causing her to look around and almost laugh out loud. She woke the sleeping turian next to her.  
"Garrus?"  
"Hmm... Yeah?"  
"We fell asleep." He stood up looking a little bleary eyed. As they had talked the night before she had made him take his armour off as they got sleepy so now he was just in his undersuit which was pretty tight. She found herself staring and looked away, hoping he was too tired to notice. She tried to distract her mind with something, anything, else but it kept wandering back to how good his arms had felt around her as she'd woken up.  
"I guess I'd better get going." He said, grabbing his armour as she pulled a bottle out of her mini fridge. "Is that where you hide those?" She smiled, trying not to feel self conscious in her too big t-shirt that was hanging off of her shoulder, leaving her chest a little exposed.  
"Yeah. The crew's terrible for taking my stuff."  
"Do you know what time it is?" He asked as he started to put his armour back on leaving Jane feeling a little disappointed.  
"Just after 0500. I get up at the same time every day."  
"Hmm... usually I'm up just before then." He shrugged as he got ready to leave but before he could Jane quickly pulled him into a hug.  
"Thanks for caring enough about me to break into my quarters. Never do it again." He smiled as he wrapped his arms around her.  
"I promise not to unless you really need it." He pulled away and she gave him a mockingly angry face before smiling again.  
"I'll meet you downstairs once I'm ready." Her smile faded when the door shut and she suddenly found herself panicking about what to wear. What was wrong with her?

* * *

"Hey Commander." She heard from behind her as she made her way towards the lift to the cargo bay.  
"Hey Kaidan." She smiled as she pushed her glasses up her nose. She'd decided Garrus was right. At least, a little. The crew knew her well enough to trust her on missions even if they thought her a little odd.  
"Since when do you wear glasses?"  
"Since always. I just didn't feel comfortable wearing them in front of the crew. What are you doing up so early?"  
"I haven't been sleeping so I decided to come down here and fix my omni-tool. I can't figure out what's wrong with it." Normally she would have just nodded and ignored it, she had never understood the distinction between helping people and showing off because the concept of showing off didn't make sense to her. But she was often accused of it so she had stopped helping people unless they specifically asked her to. Not today, she thought.  
"Can I take a look?"  
"Sure." She took the omni-tool and quickly found the corrupt program and restored it.  
"All done."  
"How'd you do that so fast?"  
"I had the same problem when I was modding my omni-tool last month. Or, at least, a similar problem. I had re-copied some code from- sorry, I don't want to bore you. Long story short, you probably want to check your language settings. Anyway, I've gotta get going."  
"Okay, Commander. Thanks again." He looked a little confused but not upset so she decided that it was all good. She smiled as she headed towards the cargo bay doors, allowing herself to skip a little instead of doing her no-nonsense Commander Shepard walk. That hadn't been too bad...

**Author's Note: For anyone wondering Shepard was singing No Surprises (the Regina Spektor version). Hope you enjoyed!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Shepard had never been one for blindly following orders and just accepting the rules. When things didn't make sense, she challenged them. That just seemed like common sense to her but apparently not. At least Garrus agreed with her, even if his methods were occasionally a little reckless. With this in mind, the decision to hijack the Normandy hadn't weighed on her at all but she couldn't help but feel shocked that the whole crew had agreed to come with her. She was so glad that she was finally accepted somewhere that she was going to fight her hardest to make sure they all came out of this in one piece. Her thoughts were interupted by a knock at her door which she answered, expecting to see Garrus. She was surprised to see Kaidan instead.

"Commander?"

"Hey Kaidan. Need something?" She pushed her glasses up her nose as she leant against her desk.

"Just to talk. It couldn't have been easy for you, going against orders like that." She frowned a little at that. Hadn't she just been thinking about how little it had bothered her?

"It was the only course of action that made sense. I didn't want to do it but I'm not gonna fret over it."

"I just wanted you to know that I'm with you." Her frown deepened a little at that. If he wasn't with her, he would have left the ship. But, she had noticed that people like to state the obvious sometimes. "It'll really hit the fan when we get to Ilos." Again, it was an obvious statement but Shepard figured that he was saying it for his sake, not hers. "If things don't go well, I want you to know- Well, I've enjoyed serving under you. The galaxy will just keep going. Everything, even the Reapers, will come around again. But you and I, we're important right now."

"You and I? Kaidan, I don't know what you're talking about." He had moved closer to her, making her feel a little claustrophobic. She'd never been one for people being overly close to her, to the point at which it was a running joke in her family that she was incapable of hugging properly. She tried to hold back her defensive instincts, trying to think of something to say that wouldn't hurt his feelings.

"Really, Shepard? All the flirting..." She tried to not look surprised. She'd just been being nice, had she been leading him on?

"Kaidan, I'm sorry but I don't do that sort of thing with crew, okay?" He looked dejected and she wanted to kick herself for upsetting him but there really hadn't been another way out of this conversation. She hadn't lied, she had never been in anything even resembling a real relationship. Just one night stands with complete strangers. It was the only way around her social anxiety since it didn't matter what someone she never saw again thought about her if she messed up social cues.

"Okay, Shepard." He headed out of the room but turned back before she shut the door. "So, if we weren't on the same ship..." She tried not to groan at his persistance.

"Kaidan, don't go there. It's not happening." She said it gently but firmly, hoping to not hurt his feelings any more but also wanting him to take the hint.

"Alright. Can't blame me for trying. Night Commander."

"Goodnight Lieutenant." She shut the door and went back to her desk, mentally exhausted from the strain of that conversation. She was proud of herself for managing to not foul it up but it had taken a lot of effort. She went to grab a drink when there was another knock at the door. She decided that if it was Kaidan again, she wouldn't be so nice about telling him _no_. However, when she opened the door her glare switched to a grin as she realised that Garrus, not Kaidan, stood on the other side.

"So, did you tell Kaidan to shove it or should I leave?" She narrowed her eyes at him.

"You knew that he was going to do this?" He smirked at that, leaning against the door frame.

"It was pretty obvious." She frowned a little.

"Not to me... Anyway, are you going to just stand there?"

"Not unless you want me to." Her frown lifted, giving way to a smile.

"No, come on in. Did you want something specific or just to hang out?"

"I figured you might need a friend. And a drink. So, I brought you these." He gave her a bag of brightly coloured gelatin sweets. "I got you them to thank you for helping with Saleon but haven't had a chance to give you them."

"They're my favourites! How did you know?" Her smiled widened as she sat down on the sofa, indicating that he should sit next to her.

"Lucky guess. I brought beer too, in case you didn't like the sweets." He said as he sat next to her, enjoying the feeling of being so close to her.

"Score! You're the best friend _ever_. Do you want to watch a vid?"

"Sure, what have you got?" She messed about with her omni-tool for a bit before grinning.

"I've got old school Star Trek or the latest Batman remake."

"I don't know what either of those are..."

"Star Trek is basically what people of the past thought space travel would be like and Batman is about a vigilante who takes to the streets of a corrupt city in an effort to stop crime." He smiled at her as she looked a little sheepish.

"That second one actually sounds pretty awesome."

"Batman it is." She set up the vid before turning to him with an eyebrow raised. "Are you gonna sit through a two hour vid in your armour?"

"I guess not." He said, feeling a little self conscious.

"You don't have to, if you don't want to. I mean... I don't want to make you uncomfortable, I just thought that, you know, you might not be comfortable. But if you are, that's fine." Jane stopped herself from rambling further and chugged half a bottle of beer in one go, much like he'd seen her do with the not-quite-pop-not-quite-energy-drinks.

"Jane, it's fine. You were right, it is a little uncomfortable. I guess I'm just so used to wearing it." Now it was his turn to look sheepish as he drank his own, turian beer. "You're gonna get so drunk if you keep chugging like that."

"I can handle my alcohol Garrus." She rolled her eyes but kept smiling. "Are you gonna keep the visor on?" She joked as she removed her glasses.

"Yes."

"Seriously? Why? What does it do outside of battle?" He looked a little uncomfortable but answered anyway.

"It gives me information on social and cultural cues. Plus, general background information on anything and everything. I probably wouldn't be able to understand half of the vid without it."

"Just ask me. Although I can't say anything, I constantly annoy people during vids and stuff by having my nose in my omni-tool. Now I see why you love this thing so much. Can I have a look?" He nodded, finally taking it off. Her breath caught in her throat as his eyes locked onto hers, for once unobscured.

"Here you go." He said after a few seconds, passing it to her, his eyes not leaving hers.

"Thanks." She managed, her voice sounding a little husky.

"So, should we put the vid on?" He asked after a few moments.

"Hmm? Oh! Yeah, sure." She blushed furiously as she finally started the vid. She downed the end of her drink before leaning back, letting the alcohol wash away her embaressment. She decided to focus on the device in her hands. "This thing plays music too? I _have_ to get one of these." She muttered and he laughed.

"You could probably add screens like this to your glasses." She grinned at the idea, the gears in her mind starting to turn.

"I knew there was a reason I liked you, Garrus."

"And here I thought I was just eye candy." He joked, making her blush a little as she laughed.

"Okay, shut up and watch the vid, this is a good bit."

* * *

Shepard hadn't realised that she'd dosed off until she was awoken by the alert her omni-tool telling her that she had half an hour until they hit Ilos. Once again she found herself in Garrus' arms and smiled at the warm feeling in her heart. She turned, in her half-asleep state, to face him and found herself just an inch from his face. Her mouth felt dry and her heart pounded although she couldn't place why. That's when her mind finally put the pieces together and she almost hit herself for not seeing it sooner. She was in love with her best friend. The shock of the realisation almost made her jump. She quickly squashed her panic as her social anxiety started to surface. This was _Garrus_ for God's sake_._ If she couldn't be herself around him then she was fucked. She didn't have to do anything about it now. Or ever, really. Maybe, she figured, if she just acted like normal everything would be fine.

"Jane?" He mumbled, causing her to nearly jump out of her skin.

"Hey. You should get ready. We hit Ilos in twenty five minutes." _Come on Jane,_ she thought to herself, _just act normal. How hard can that be?_


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

_"Go!" She yells as a piece of Sovereign hits the side of the chamber, pieces of Reaper and building raining down. One piece lands where she once stood. His heart is hollow as he struggles to get up. She can't be dead. She _can't _be. He was in love with her, dammit, and he couldn't lose her now. Then, as if answering his thoughts, she climbs up on top of the piece of dead Reaper, limping and holding her arm but very much alive. And he couldn't be happier._

"Hey." Garrus was awoken from his memory by a whisper coming from the door of his hospital room.

"Jane? Aren't you supposed to be in bed? If I'm not allowed up, you certainly aren't." She limped into his room and leant against his bed, supporting her weight on her arms.

"Garrus, I am bored shitless in there. I figured you wouldn't rat me out." He sighed, she was right. He was just as bored as she was.

"Fine, just sit down. You're gonna hurt yourself." She frowned as she surveyed the room.

"Where? There aren't any chairs." Garrus sighed agian, remembering the kind nurse who had agreed to remove the chair after his third hour long visit from one of the crew who was really just waiting for Shepard to be up. He suspected that she had faked sleeping to avoid visitors, a tactic he couldn't quite master. He was still trying to think of an alternative when she shifted her weight, causing her to almost topple over. He managed to lean forward and catch her just in time.

"Okay, that's it. Get up here and sit next to me before you collapse." She tried her hardest not to blush as she realised that he was right. She climbed into the bed next to him, glad that the hospital beds were designed for multiple species and so were big enough for both of them to lie next to each other. It was snug but not uncomfortable.

"Thanks. I can't use my omni-tool or even hold a pen so I've been thinking about things for my glasses, you know, to add the screens, and I can't jot any of it down. It's driving me crazy."

"We could watch a vid to take your mind off of it." She smiled at that as he lifted up his own omni-tool and activated the screen.

"We could watch old school Star Trek. You'll love it. Just access my omni-tool files remotely. The password is SJB5670." He smirked at that.

"You know, I could do all sorts of damage with that password." He joked and she hit him with her good arm.

"I'm trusting you Garrus. Betray that trust and I _will_ kill you." She gave him a mock glare.

"No you won't." He said simply, causing her to smile.

"Probably not, but I'll never talk to you again."

"Okay, okay. I won't mess with anything. Promise. Which episode?" She thought for a moment.

"This one. It's a classic." They watch the first few minutes before she began fidgeting. Not having access to her omni-tool was obviously killing her.

"So, how far along are you with figuring out how to upgrade your glasses?" Her face lit up as she began to explain.

"I figured out how to reduce the number of wires needed so that I could just adapt my current frames." He looked at the large, thick, black, square frames around her eyes and frowned a little.

"Why not just get new frames?" She sighed a little, taking the frames off to look at them.

"There's no point in symbolically wearing my glasses if I get new ones. I've had these frames since I was thirteen."

"Okay, okay. So, what else have you figured out?"

"I'm working on a new targeting program-"

"Why not just use one of the ones you can already buy?"

"There's no point in a targeting system that doesn't react as I do. I was thinking that I could make it a two part system and you could upload one part to your visor but then I remembered that we're technically done with Saren now... I guess you'll go back to C-Sec." She looked away, putting every ounce of effort into not letting her voice crack. She'd never had a problem with goodbyes before but this one... she didn't want to think about returning to the Normandy without him.

"I've re-applied for Spectre training." He admitted, a little sheepishly.

"Really, Garrus? That's awesome! Wait, won't that piss off your dad?" He shrugged.

"Probably. But I'm a grown man and he'll get over it. The training takes six months. It's supposed to be a year but apparently by serving with you on the Normandy I get to skip the first half. Then, as long as I pass, I'll have my pick of Spectre assignments. Spectres often work in small groups or pairs so if you wanted..." Her face lit up and she practically jumped up and down where she lay.

"That would be the greatest thing ever! Garrus, can you imagine? You and me working side by side, chasing down bad guys?" He laughed a little at her excitement, allowing his face to mirror her own.

"Isn't that what we've been doing for the past few months?" He joked.

"Yes, but this time you won't be my subordinate. We'd be partners. Like Batman and Catwoman."

"I don't think you're amorale enough to be Catwoman. I mean, there is no ambiguity about whether or not you're the good guy." She gave a cheeky grin in responce.

"No, but I look great in leather." She laughed, trying not to blush. "Okay, let's get back to the vid, you're missing the good bit." They watched for a few more minutes before Garrus groaned at the screen.

"Oh, come on! That is _not_ how gunpowder works." Jane snorted at that. "What?"

"Nothing, just that's what I said when I first watched this episode with my dad."

"What did he say?"

"He just laughed and said '_now _you start pointing out scientific inaccuracies?'" They laughed and he noticed that she had brought her book with her. A quick peek at the cover told him that it was the same book that she had been reading the first time he'd been in her quarters.

"So, do you only own the one book?" He joked and she looked a little awkward, a bittersweet smile playing on her lips.

"Honest to God real books, yes. I have a bunch of digital editions but this is the only real one."

"How come? I thought you said you loved reading real books." She looked at him and he saw that her eyes were full of sorrow, even if she was smiling.

"I do. I used to have a whole bunch of real books. Practically my own library. But, you don't have much room living on ships. Do you remember what I told you about when I first went to school?" He nodded.

"You went to live with your aunt and cousins on Mindoir." She bit her lip, trying to stop herself from crying as she prepared to tell her tale.

"I was bullied pretty badly and the teachers didn't really know what to do with me so after a year I was pulled out and went back to living with my mother. She was concerned that I didn't have a normal life but I was happier than I had been at the school. I would go back and stay with my cousins for a few months every year. I would take all of the nessecary tests to pass that year of school but mostly I would just stay at home reading and playing with my cousins. My eldest cousin, Sarah, was just a couple of years younger than me and we were as close as sisters. She was popular and had lots of friends but we both loved books so we shared a collection of them. For my sixteenth birthday she got me this book, it's by one of our favourite authors. I don't know how but she managed to get me a signed copy. It was pretty much the only thing, apart from my omni-tool, that I had aboard the ship with me." She paused, looking at the cover of the book.

"What happened?" He asked softly. She looked at him, her eyes glistening with tears.

"A few months later Mindoir was attacked by batarian slavers. My Aunt Riley and my cousins, Sarah, James and Bella, were killed." A single tear escaped her eyes as Garrus held her close to him. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to cry." She said finally, drying her eyes.

"Jane, it's fine. It's more than understandable."

"Thanks. That was just under a year before I met you. Before that my mom hadn't been too keen on the idea of me joining the Alliance. I think she desperately wanted me to have a normal life. After the attack, I knew that I had to protect others from harm and for once my mother didn't argue."

"You weren't always sure that you wanted to be a soldier?" He seemed a little surprised. It was hard to imagine her doing anything else.

"Nope. Hell, everything just sort of happened after the attack. I wasn't sure what I was going to do and the Alliance seemed just as good an oppurtunity as any. I was going to be an engineer, like my dad, but then my biotics showed up. I still wasn't sure what I wanted to do at Elysium. I just sort of ended up where ever my superiors sent me. I had no end game or plan. And then I end up being called a hero and being put in for the N7 program. I hadn't wanted it, it had just happened. Same with the Spectre thing. I hadn't really wanted it but it was the job I was given. I haven't had a plan for the future for so long... It's weird to have one now. Even if it is only to have you back by my side in six months." He smiled at her, still holding her close.

"You must have wanted to do with your life when you were a kid. Some childhood dream, even if it was something dumb like being a superhero." She laughed a little at that.

"It wasn't that dumb but it was pretty silly. I loved the stage." She admitted.

"Like singing?" She nodded.

"And acting. I could never connect with individuals but the faceless mob? Strangely enough, performing in front of hundreds was less nerve-wracking to me than talking to one person. The last summer I was on Mindoir there was a summer school and I decided to sign up for the music class. My mom was over the moon, she thought I would finally make friends."

"Did you?"

"Nope. The first day we were asked to split off into groups. One girl I was a little friendly with asked me to join her group but the others didn't think I was right for their type of music." He could see that she was dancing around the truth.

"You can say that they were bitches to you." She blushed a little.

"They weren't that bad..."

"Really?"

"Fine, the group leader was a total bitch. The other were okay, they just didn't want to stand up to her. So I asked the teacher if I could work alone. I class lasted a week and at the end of every day we would showcase our work to the class. I wrote new songs every day and a lot of the others seemed to like them. On the last day we performed in front of the other classes and our families. I decided not to sing one of my own songs since I don't play an instrument and didn't have any music. One of the boys in the class who was friendly towards me agreed to record guitar backing for one of my favourite songs and I sang that. I think being on that stage was the most fun I'd ever had."

"You are a brilliant singer." She blushed at that. "So, did you show up those other girls?"

"_Garrus._ I didn't show up anyone, they performed quite well." She was lying and he raised a brow plate.

"Really?" She laughed a little.

"Dammit, you know me too well. They weren't bad." He snorted at that.

"That's Jane code for diabolical." She bit her lip to stop herself from laughing.

"You're _so_ mean."

"And you're too nice. We balance each other out perfectly." She smiled at that as they finished watching the vid. "Okay, I admit. That was hilarious and also pretty good. We'll have to watch one of my favourite vids next time."

"You're on. I'd better go before the nurses start looking for me." She began to leave the room, her book still resting on the bedside table.

"Jane, your book." She smiled at him.

"I know you're not really a book person-"

"Says who?" She gave him a look.

"The novelisation of the Blasto movies does not count as reading. Oh, dear God, I sound like Sarah. I used to hate it when she made fun of me for reading bad sci-fi instead of the classic literature she tried to shove down my throat. Anyway, that book is one of the few she made me read that I fell in love with. You can borrow it if you want. I think you'll like it."

"Jane. I'd love to read it but I can get a digital copy you don't-"

"Garrus, think of it as a guarantee that I'll see you again. There's no way you'll finish it before I leave the Citadel, it may be short but it's in English, so you keep a hold of it until your Spectre training is done and you come back to the Normandy. I'm not waiting over ten years this time." He nodded at that, agreeing with her. He could barely stand the six months it would take for the training so any reason to see her as soon as possible was fine by him.

"Thank you, Jane. For trusting me."

"Hey, what are best friends for?" She was about to leave when he felt the urge to say something.

"Hey, Jane?"

"Yeah."

"I have it on good authority that we'll fighting side by side again soon." She smiled at him, folding her arms.

"Oh, really? Whose?"

"Believe it or not Wrex's. He explains it better than I could. He's quite the story teller."

"Cool. I'll go visit him after I'm discharged. I think he's already left the Normandy."

* * *

"So, Garrus tells me you're quite the story teller. I already knew that but apparently you also see the future." Jane sat at the bar in Flux, ignoring the loud music as much as she could as she drank her beer. The Krogan next to her laughed as he downed his drink in one go.

"Ha! I'll tell you something Shepard. I've never seen two people more in sync with each other on the battlefield. I don't think there's any enemy the two of you couldn't take down together." Shepard laughed as she finished her drink and ordered another.

"We'd probably need help with another Reaper. Probably." She joked.

"The Krogan have legends about that kind of bond. Blood Tied they're called. All of the greatest warriors in our history were Blood Tied." Shepard tried not to laugh.

"Sorry Wrex but it sounds like superstitious nonesense to me." She looked at him, slightly apologetic since she didn't want to offend him.

"Fair enough. I always thought so too. I remember you telling Ashley that you weren't religious." She tried not to groan.

"It's all just theories based on circumstancial evidence. I'm not saying it's not true, I just don't find any one religion more compelling than the others and there are so many. Anyway, I hate talking about religion. It's such a touchy subject."

"Well, Krogan don't really have religion but we've got our legends. I didn't really put much stock in the legends of the Blood Tied, I've been around the galaxy too long. But seeing you and the kid fighting together? It's almost enough to make an old Krogan believe again."

"Well, you knew you were such a softy?" She joked, downing her fifth or sixth beer, she couldn't really remember.

"Tell anyone and I'll kill you." He joked back, making her laugh, before becoming serious again. "There is one thing the stories always made clear about the Blood Tied. No matter how far from each other they wandered, fate had a way of bringing them back together. Sometimes painfully and explosively but it always happened."

"Thanks Wrex. I think I needed that. I'm gonna miss you. Hell, I'm going to miss all of you guys. It's just gonna be me and Kaidan left. I might go crazy."

"You mean _crazier_?" She laughed, punching him in the arm.

"Fine. _Crazier_. Don't make me regret saying I'll miss you."

"Wouldn't dream of it Shepard."

* * *

"So, I guess this is it." Jane stood at the docking bay, ready to board the Normandy but she was struggling to say goodbye.

"Yeah. I-" Garrus started but she surprised him by pulling him into a hug before he could say whatever rambling goodbye attempt he was about to make. She'd never been one for hugging (she had almost hit Kaidan when he'd tried to hug her) and neither had he but they both found comfort in each other's arms. "Spirits Jane, I'm going to miss you."

"I know. I'm going to miss you too. But it's only for a few months. Plus, I'm gonna pretty much constantly message you over the Extranet." She said, pulling away from the hug.

"Same."

"So, I've got a going away gift to give you. It's nothing major but I was thinking if I do set up the visor systems to work together then we could maybe listen to the same music to keep our shooting in time and stuff..." She shifted a little awkwardly.

"Do you just spend all of your time thinking up great ideas?" She grinned.

"Pretty much. So, I thought I'd leave you with a playlist of my favourite music. That way when you're missing me and stuff... well..." He grinned, pulling her into another quick hug.

"How about we swap playlists? You give me yours and I'll give you mine?" She smiled at him.

"Okay, then. I've tried to leave sad songs off of the list because I know that I'm gonna be sad when I think of you and I didn't want you to be sad when you thought of me but I couldn't resist one or two. I've also put little explanations by each song... I had a lot of time to kill when I was stuck in the hospital." She explained, looking a little sheepish.

"Jane, It's brilliant. It's the most thoughtful gift anyone has ever given me." He pulled her in for one last hug. "I'm going to miss you." He wanted so much to just tell her how he felt then and there. But he knew it wouldn't be fair to either of them. He'd wait the six months and see if he still felt the same way when he was back on the Normandy with her. If he did, then he'd tell her.

On the opposite side of the hug, Jane came to a similar decision.

**AN: Jane's book is The Fault in Our Stars by John Green. Just for anyone wondering.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Jane bit her lip as she stood by the Galaxy Map. She was on duty but there was nothing going on so she had been messaging Garrus until he'd gone to bed. Now she was looking at the screen, trying to find the courage to type a few simple words. She thought that time apart would make her feelings for him fade away but, if anything, they were intensified. Now she was thinking that she'd go crazy if she didn't tell him how she felt but she couldn't bring herself to type the words. She tried a few times but each attempt only lasted a few words before she deleted it and started over. She was onto what felt like her hundredth attempt when the ship suddenly shook, causing her to topple over. _Not good,_ she thought as she went to assess the damage.

* * *

She tried desperately to plug the hole in her air line, to no avail. She knew that she only had seconds left as she headed towards the planet below, her consciousness fading fast. _I'm sorry Garrus,_ she thought as she faded to black, _I am so sorry..._

* * *

Garrus awoke with a start on the Citadel, trying to figure out why he felt like he was suffocating. For some reason he felt an overwhelming need to contact Jane so he brought up his omni-tool display and typed in a short message.

_Hey. You still up?_

He figured that the message would take a while to send but he couldn't shake the sense that something was wrong. But for now, it was the middle of the night and he needed some sleep. He went into his music player and scrolled down Jane's playlist, glad that he had updated his translator so that he could understand the lyrics. He scrolled past all of the turian rock and asari soul until he found her old Earth songs. Eventually he found the one he was looking for.

_Ceiling of Plankton - Givers - Note: This one always makes me think of you_

He couldn't help but smile as he read her little note. All of the songs had them, ranging from 'I listened to this one over and over again on my way from the Citadel to biotic training' to 'This one always makes me cry. Always.' He'd avoided the sad ones since they made him miss her even more but he'd still listened to them. Especially when reading her book. His visor translated the words for him but she was right, it was slow going. It was mostly to do with his tight training schedule and the fact that almost any and all downtime was spent messaging her. He wished that she wasn't so far out from the relays so that he could vidcall her but he figured it was also a blessing. His feelings for her had only grown since they'd been apart and he figured if he saw her he wouldn't be able to keep it to himself which wouldn't be fair on either of them given how far away they were from each other. He eventually let his mind slow down and found an uneasy sleep.

* * *

Garrus awoke early the next morning, exhausted from his night of no sleep. He checked his omni-tool for a message from Jane but found none. Instead he found a message sent to him through the Spectre Training Program systems. He sighed as he pulled himself out of bed. He wasn't awake enough to deal with that just yet so he turned off his omni-tool and got ready, trying to shake the cold feeling in his gizzard. Half an hour later he finally sat down to read the message but instead found his eyes drifting towards last night's conversation with Jane.

_My argument from last night is still valid. We need cool nicknames. Like superheroes. - Jane_

_Why? - Garrus_

_Because my messages are signed with JANE. It's so boring. I hate my name. It's what they call people when they don't know their name. - Jane_

_Okay, so, what would your nickname be? - Garrus_

_I dunno. Maybe something to do with mythical creatures. What do you think? - Jane_

_If it's a mythical being it should be one known for protection. That is your thing after all. - Garrus_

_Like a Guardian Angel? - Jane_

_If my extranet data is correct then it's perfect. - Garrus_

_Okay, then. What about you? It doesn't seem fair that I get a cool nickname and you don't. - GuardianAngel_

_Well, unlike you I don't have a problem with my name. - Garrus_

_Harhar. Seriously, choose something. - GuardianAngel_

_I don't know. Do Guardian Angels work with any other beings or whatever. - Garrus_

_I guess. I don't really know shit about angels to be honest. I'll look it up. - GuardianAngel_

_Jane? You still there? - Garrus_

_Yeah, sorry. I had to at least look like I was doing work. - GuardianAngel_

_Should you be messaging me while on duty? - Garrus_

_Should you be messaging me when you're in class? - GuardianAngel_

_I'm not in class. - Garrus_

_You were before. - GuardianAngel_

_Okay, okay. So, did you find anything? - Garrus_

_Yeah, what about Archangel? Apparently they were pretty badass. - GuardianAngel_

_Well, if you think they're badass that's all I need. - Archangel_

_So, if you're not in class what are you doing? What time is it? - GuardianAngel_

_It's late and I'm watching the news. They just replayed that piece you did with Emily Wong before you left. __- Archangel_

_God, was it terrible? I kept hearing my mother telling me to tone down the weird... __- GuardianAngel_

_It was really good. I don't think anyone was expecting you to handle the cameras so well. __- Archangel_

_Thanks. __- GuardianAngel_

_No problem. I should get some sleep. __- Archangel_

_Okay. I'll be here... avoiding Alenko... __- GuardianAngel_

_Is he still pestering you? __- Archangel_

_It's not so bad. I think he figured that with you gone I'd be spending more time with him. I miss you. __- GuardianAngel_

_I miss you too. __- Archangel_

_Night. __- GuardianAngel_

_Night. __- Archangel_

_Hey. You still up? __- Archangel_

Garrus smiled at the conversation before dragging his gaze to the new message. It was short but those few lines caused his world to fall out from under him.

* * *

It was the first day out of his apartment for Garrus since he'd confirmed the news. It was the day of the funeral/memorial/whatever-they-were-calling-it and he guessed that it was finally time to face the truth. She was gone. Some of the others had tried to talk to him and, although his mind hadn't really been present, he'd seen the denial on each of their faces. Most of them had assumed that he would be found inside a bottle like quite a few of them had been. To be honest, he'd expected that himself. After confirming the news he'd tried to drown his sorrows in a bottle of Turian Ale but it was no use. No matter how clouded with alcohol his thoughts became he was still acutely aware of the piece of him that was missing. In the end he had concentrated on finishing her book, trying to keep his mind away from the gaping hole that she had left. He wished that he could deny it like the others, pretend that it couldn't be true, but he _knew_ that she was gone. Hell, he'd known before he'd read the message, he just hadn't wanted to believe it. And now, it was time to say goodbye properly at the service meant to commemorate Commander Shepard but he couldn't help but wonder if anyone would say goodbye to Jane.

Garrus stood beside Tali and Wrex with the rest of the crew that had helped to take down Saren. They had all been asked to say something but Garrus had been too busy keeping himself distracted to really think about what to say until this morning. He stood stoical as one by one people stood to talk about The Great Commander Shepard until he saw two people standing at the front of the audience and realised that they must be Jane's parents. Her mother looked nothing like her, with her shorter build and pale skin, except for her thick blonde hair and piercing green eyes. Next to her was Jane's father. He was quite tall, almost as tall as Garrus, and had dark hair and Jane's golden skin. He even wore glasses, although his were frameless and much less noticeable than Jane's had been. He noticed that they hadn't yet stood up to speak when it was the crew's turn to say their pieces. It was fascinating to watch as Tali treated Shepard as a Quarian Captain and Wrex treated her like a Krogan Battlemaster. Liara and Kaidan both spoke of how she'd changed their lives and then it was his turn.

"I've never been good with words so I'm going to borrow someone else's. 'You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world, but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices.'" That was all he could bring himself to say as his sub-harmonics began trilling. He was thankful that human's couldn't hear it. That was the end of the speeches and the vid screen started up, revealing an old vid of a teenage Jane standing on a stage in a black knee-length dress, her hair loose around her shoulders and her glasses absent. Music began to play and his visor immediately pulled up the name of the song and artist, along with a note from Jane.

_The Sea Is a Good Place to Think of the Future - Los Campesinos - Note: It really is..._

Jane on the screen began to sing and Garrus realised that the vid must be from the summer before Mindoir was attacked. Back when she had dreams of the future.

"_I grabbed hold of her wrist and my hand closed from tip to tip_  
_I said 'you've taken the diet too far, you have got to let it slip'_  
_But she's not eating again, she's not eating again, she's not eating again, she's not eating again._  
_I ask her to speak French and then I need her to translate, I get the feeling she makes the meaning more significant._  
_She was always far too pretty for me to believe in a single word she said, believe a word she said._  
_At fourteen her mother died in a routine operation, from allergic reaction to a general anesthetic. She spent the rest of her teens experimenting with prescriptions, in a futile attempt to know more than the doctors._  
_She said one day to leave her, sand up to her shoulders waiting for the tide_  
_to drag her to the ocean, to another sea's shore._  
_This thing hurts like hell,_  
_but what did you expect?_" Garrus gave the turian equivalent of a bittersweet smile but as soon as the vid ended her absence seemed even more acute. He began to wonder what he would do now. Becoming a Spectre had been his dream for as long as he could remember and yet now he couldn't imagine doing it without her. It seemed pointless. Everything did.

* * *

Garrus returned to his apartment, still unsure of what to do. Did he bother going back to the Spectre training or did he go back to C-Sec as if she never existed? Or did he do something else altogether? He eventually decided that he should check his messages, deliberately keeping his gaze from Jane's messages. At least he did until he found one that had been sent to him in the last hour. It had no text but contained a video file. He sat for a few minutes before finally activating it. On the screen in front of him Jane sat at her desk in her oversized t-shirt and black joggers. She looked tired, removing her glasses before looking directly at the screen.

"If you are watching this then it means that I am dead. God, that sounds so dramatic." She sighed, leaning back into her chair, running her hand through her hair.

"I hate updating these things. I should really do this later when I'm not so tired but I've done this on the same day every year since I was sixteen so... I've managed so far but this is the first time I've recorded one for you so it's a little more difficult. Whatever, it's not like I'm going to be killed by geth in the next few months and I'll update this after I see you again." She looked as if she was thinking for a few moments.

"Yeah, I'll definitely end up rerecording this after I see you again. Unless, I chickened out. So, if you're watching this and it's after we've met up again then I am a coward." She looked seriously at the camera before laughing and sighing once again.

"I hate this, I'm rambling. That's the problem with this, it's too one way. I need you interrupting my babbling with your smart-ass comments. Anyway, I should probably explain why I'm doing this. Like I said, I've recorded these every year since I was sixteen. I know, that sounds really morbid but bare in mind that I'd just lost a huge chunk of my family who all lived in relative safety.

"So, the summer I did the music class my mom was really worried that I wouldn't make any friends so she sent me to a councillor. It helped a little but not much. Anyway, his best advice was that I should write a diary which I thought was a dumb idea so I didn't. Until a year later. My mom was stressed out and she yelled at me, I can't even remember what for, but I was upset and I didn't want to call my dad because it would only upset my mom and I had no one else to call. Normally I'd message Sarah but I couldn't so I just wrote it down.

"So, I started writing diary entries in my notebook and after a while I realised that if I died all that would be left of me would be my notebook. All I had left of my Aunt and cousins were a few photos, some drawings Bella had sent me, some half finished two-player game saves across my and James' accounts and my copy of The Fault in Our Stars that Sarah had given me." She started to laugh a little, it was tired and hollow but his heart responded in full force.

"In the corner of the back page she wrote 'Straight & Fast'. It's a reference to another book by the same author. I could explain it but it'll take a while and I'm pretty tired. Plus, I'm sure by now your visor has loaded up all of the appropriate information." It had. "It was a joke about her dying and in the end it was all I had left of her. Not in some great mysterious sense like in the book that it's referring to because I knew _exactly_ how she died. Anyway, it got me thinking about my diary and I realised that it was how I vented my sadness so that it wouldn't touch other people but it didn't represent how I really felt about the people I cared about. So, I started recording these."

She sighed again and leant forward, glasses in hand, so that her focus was directly on the camera, her piercing green eyes looking directly into his. "Garrus, I'm not going to tell you what to do. I want to. I want to tell you to complete your Spectre training and become a hero and fall in love and have a family and just generally do all of the cliché things associated with living a full and happy life. But I'm not going to because if you're watching this then I'm dead so what the fuck do I know?

"So, just do me a favour, okay? Just one little thing. Do what _you _think is right. Don't let others box you in, okay? I think we've both spent too much time just existing. God, recording this just reminds me of how much I miss you. It's like a piece of me is missing and if you feel the same way and you're watching this... Then I am so sorry Garrus. So, _so_ sorry. I don't know if you finished my book yet and this won't make sense until you've read the last page but I just wanted to say that I like my choices, I really do. I just hope that you like yours." With that the recording ended and Garrus was left knowing that he couldn't continue on as he had before but wondering what he was going to do now. In the end the question came down to; what_ did_ he think was right?


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

"Wake up Commander." Shepard stirred groggily. "Shepard, do you hear me? Get out of that bed now - this facility is under attack."

_Not dead. That's... unexpected._ Shepard thought as she fought to focus her thoughts.

"Shepard. Your scars aren't healed, but I need you to get moving. This facility is under attack." Shepard sat up slowly, trying to get her bearings.

_Garrus and I were messaging each other..._

_Kaidan kept invading my personal space and I almost decked him..._

_We were attacked..._

_I died._

_Apparently I only nearly died. Cool._

Once she had collected her thoughts she began to wonder where she was and how long she'd been out for. How had they found her? Who were_ they_?

"There's a pistol in the locker on the other side of the room. Hurry!" Shepard groaned as she stood up. She _hated_ pistols. They didn't have enough power to them. She might as well just keep to her hand-to-hand and biotics. "Grab the armour and pistol from the locker. We don't have time to wait around Shepard." Whoever this voice belonged to needed to chill out, she decided. The armour was nice, nicer than she was used to at any rate. The pistol on the other hand... she had seem schematics for a disposable heat sink system but she had never seen it actually _applied_ to a weapon before. Again, she wondered how long she'd been out for.

"This pistol doesn't have a thermal clip." She pointed out to the voice.

"It's a med-bay Shepard." The voice countered and she sighed in response.

"By that logic there shouldn't even be a pistol here... I don't suppose by any chance you have my glasses around here?" There was a few moments of silence as Shepard finished putting on her armour and tied her hair up in a bobble she had found in one of the locker's drawers.

"I think we have more important things to worry about right now!" The voice exclaimed but Shepard shrugged.

"Just thought I'd ask." She was going to be so annoyed if she had to buy new frames and start from scratch.

* * *

Shepard fought her way through the mechs, pretty much ignoring her pistol in favour of her fists. Luckily for her, the mechs weren't fast enough to even dream of being a challenge. She was much happier once she picked up a grenade launcher but she still felt weird. Off. Something inside her was tugging at her, begging to be noticed but she couldn't decide what it was so she ignored it. She encountered files as she moved through the facility and they didn't paint a pretty picture. She had assumed that she had been retrieved just after she'd blacked out but by the look of things she'd been clinically dead for a while. Not that it really mattered, her brain had been preserved so it didn't really matter what had happened to the body. Although, she began to wonder more on the time frame of her 'reconstruction' as she saw more and more pieces of technology that seemed a little too advanced.

Her suspicions were confirmed when she ran into Jacob. He seemed alright but she still didn't know who these people were so she fell back into familiar territory; stay quiet, don't let on how much you know and _observe_. She stayed that way as they fought through the facility and met up with Miranda. Her tactics seemed even more appropriate once she learnt who exactly had gone to the trouble of rebuilding her. She was used to not trusting others and not letting them get close but the isolation only made the hole in her heart more apparent and she wondered where Garrus was now.

* * *

The Illusive Man pissed her off. Not that she was going to let him know that. He played her own game a little too well for her liking. They both said little, expecting the other to reveal everything in return. But she knew this game well, it only worked if you were telling at least a partial truth so she believed that he was telling the truth when it came to defeating the Reapers. Plus, his logic was sound and he seemed intelligent. Intelligent enough to not underestimate her, which she wasn't used to. So, with that in mind, she had agreed to go to Freedom's Progress.

She kept up her silent-unless-necessary act with Miranda and Jacob. They seemed a little disquieted by it but they followed her orders nonetheless. So, it had shocked both of them when they encountered Tali and Jane had started speaking excitedly. She hadn't really expected Tali to agree to join her but she'd had to ask. It had been nice to see her regardless and if Jane had had any doubts about their friendship post-rebuild, they were squashed when Tali had lowered her voice before she left to give her the information she'd been desperately craving without her even asking.

"None of the old gang have seen him since your funeral but I've been keeping track of his omni-tool, making sure he didn't kill himself. He keeps it too well encrypted for me to get a location but he's alive."

"Thank you, Tali." She choked a little as tears threatened her composure. She'd already known that he was alive but to hear it confirmed by someone else lifted her spirits. Although, she was careful to not let Cerberus see that.

Once again she and the Illusive Man had danced with their words but this time she wasn't just sizing him up. She _needed_ information and he had it but she couldn't let him know exactly _what _information she was trying so hard to get. So, she told him she wanted her old team back, not a lie but she really only wanted back Tali, Wrex and Garrus. Kaidan was a good soldier but hardly unique and as much as she liked Liara, she wasn't the most skilled fighter. But she asked about all of them, carefully keeping her voice neutral when she asked about Garrus. But they'd moved on. It had been two years and the world had moved on without her, leaving her in an all too familiar position.

Since boarding the new Normandy Shepard had kept to her quarters. She was glad to have Joker and Chakwas aboard, Joker had even returned her glasses to her in an attempt to say sorry of getting her spaced (not that she had ever blamed him), but she still didn't trust Jacob and Miranda fully. Jacob seemed like a decent guy but decent guys didn't work for terrorist organisations. Miranda was one of those women that Jane could never quite figure out but she was tempted to give her the benefit of the doubt. She just couldn't bring herself to deal with them yet, she didn't trust her own judgement enough and both Joker and Chakwas were still forming opinions. EDI, on the other hand, Jane liked. People were difficult and confusing to read but AI? She didn't trust her exactly but she could predict what the AI would do much better than she could her human counterparts. Although, she had disabled all listening devices in her quarters. She figured she couldn't be too careful on a Cerberus ship.

They were headed to Omega and Jane figured that she should be sleeping but she couldn't. She was filled with nervous energy and every second spent without her mind being occupied was a second the tugging feeling was brought to the forefront of her mind. She decided to go and see Joker, just to talk to someone for a while but before she left her quarters she figured that if she was going to deal harshly with Cerberus, she'd have to dress the part...

**AN: My chapters have been longer recently but this one was just about bringing Jane back so it's shorter again. Next chapter should be up soon. Hope you enjoyed!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Shepard decided she liked Aria. The asari cut straight to the point and kept things simple, just how Shepard liked them. She'd only glanced at the dossiers before coming aboard the space station, allowing her glasses to download the information she needed and distribute it at appropriate times. She figured they were two years overdue for a test run.

"Okay gang. Let's grab Archangel first." Shepard said, motioning towards the recruiters down the stairs.

"With all due respect Shepard, we need Professor Solus working on the Collector data right away." _Why is it that whenever someone says 'with all due respect' they really mean 'kiss my ass'?_ Shepard bit back a smile at the memory of Ashley, shaking her head. She knew that Miranda's point was valid but she was a little annoyed that Miranda didn't _know_ that she knew that. But, then again, that had been her game, hadn't it? To let them underestimate her. But that tactic can only work for so long before you have to make the choice. Did she keep Miranda and Jacob at arms length forever or did she give them a chance if for no other reason than to see what they did with it? She fell firmly on the side of giving them a chance but right now doing so would put her at risk in a way she hadn't been in years. Well, she figured, she could settle for making them think twice about double crossing her for now and decide on that chance later.

"Grabbing Archangel will be an in and out mission. Solus can wait for a day but from what Aria said our vigilante can't. You understand?" Miranda nodded, looking a little surprised. It was understandable, given that was easily the most Shepard had said to her since waking up so she gave the dark haired woman a quick, reassuring smile before they proceeded to the recruitment room.

"Well, aren't you sweet? You're in the wrong place, honey. Stripper's quarters are that way." She raised her eyebrow at the batarian before pushing her glasses up her nose.

"Funny. Not as funny as the poor logic behind your bosses attempts to get Archangel but, hey, I'm just here for the paycheck. I assume this is a standard canon fodder job. Standard fee of around 500 credits paid after the job's done, I don't pick up credits for dead friends and I remain a completely independent party, right?" To his credit he simply nodded.

"Good, seems like you might actually know what you're doing. Any questions?"

"Just one. How'd Archangel manage to piss off your bosses? He's just one guy." She narrowed her eyes at him as she tried to figure out why she felt so weird about this mission.

"He had a whole team but we dealt with them. Now he's just one guy. But he's got the advantage. It's his base of operations and he knows we're coming. He's planned for an attack like this. We've lost a lot of men trying to get him already." Shepard was impressed, whoever this Archangel was one thing was certain; he was a hell of a badass.

"Where do we go?" She asked, eager to get on her way.

* * *

Shepard decided that she hated Omega. She'd been told how shitty it was before arriving and she really didn't expect anything else but there was something about seeing a kid almost throw their life away that made her want to hunt down and shoot every criminal in sight. She was in this state of mind when she passed a weapons store on her way to meet the merc who would transport them to Archangel which had the one type of weapon Cerberus had not thought to supply her with. Hell, even the Alliance hadn't let her have one due to regulations.

"Shepard, you can't be serious!" Miranda exclaimed but Shepard had the gleam in her eyes that she only got when she found something _really_ interesting. It was what Garrus called her 'mad scientist' look.

"Don't worry, I'm trained with it. Wait, shouldn't you know that already?" Shepard may not be ready to trust Miranda but she seemed good at her job and Shepard very much wanted to uphold the belief that the woman who had been in charge of rebuilding her was at least somewhat capable.

"Of course I know that but a sword is hardly practical on a modern battlefield." Shepard snorted at that.

"All armour has weak points. They can be tricky to hit with bullets but no one expects you to have a sword." Miranda was still frustrated but her next comment had an air of humour about it.

"That's because it's completely suicidal." Shepard just smiled as they made their way towards the transport.

"Not_ completely._"

* * *

Garrus _hated_ Omega. He'd still been deciding what to do after the funeral when a friend at C-Sec had asked him to help out with a case. He'd solved the case but he had found that a large supply of the drugs making their way to the Citadel had come from Omega so he had headed there, hoping to put a stop to the crap that he couldn't touch when he was at C-Sec. The stuff that had made him re-apply for Spectre training in the first place. He probably would have stuck it out longer had the Council not started to dismiss the Reaper threat and began painting Shepard as delusional. So he had gone to Omega and started to make a difference. And then, a few months ago, the piece of him that was missing was no longer so painful but, rather, morphed into a strange tugging feeling. As if something was trying to tell him that he should be somewhere else. Of course, before he had time to think about it too carefully he'd been betrayed and now, as he faced certain death, his thoughts turned to Jane.

He leant back for a second to take another stim as there was a lull between the waves of mercs being sent across the bridge. He'd been awake for days holding this position and he knew that time was running out but he was determined to take as many mercs with him as possible. He got ready for the next wave as his visor started to play a song from Jane's playlist and he almost laughed at how perfect it was.

_I Will Follow You into the Dark - Death Cab For Cutie - Note: This is kind of morbid so I'm not sure why I'm putting it on here but... it's one of my favourites and has been for years._

He lined up his sniper rifle as the next wave began to move towards him when his visor suddenly cut out before restarting. When it came back online the interface had been completely redesigned and there was a little loading bar at the bottom of the screen telling him that it was syncing. _Syncing to what?_ His thoughts were answered as three new mercs approached, the leader catching his attention. Piercing green eyes met his own through her thick black frames and his helmet's tinted visor. She nodded slightly as she pulled a sword out with one hand and a shotgun out with the other and her biotics flared. Wielding a shotgun with one hand, using her biotics to steady it, was a trick she used when she was looking to impress, although the sword was a new touch. That was when a new song began playing through his visor.

"_We are Sex Bob-Omb! One, two, three, four!_" Shepard began to move, her body a blur of biotic energy, and Garrus would have stood transfixed if he didn't know exactly which targets she was expecting him to catch. Her two human squad members seemed at a bit of a loss as Shepard took on the crowd of mercs with extreme skill, sometimes making a move that seemed to leave her open but that left the mercs open to him when they tried to take advantage of it. Just as the song ended, the last merc fell dead and Shepard made her way up to him. He had a million questions but he no longer felt as if a part of him was missing, confirming for him that this was indeed his Jane.

* * *

The tugging feeling in Jane's chest was leading her straight to Archangel and she got the feeling that something obvious was right in front of her and she just couldn't quite figure out what it was. Until, of course, Archangel had removed his helmet.

"Garrus!" She exclaimed, forgetting about the two Cerberus operatives next to her as she ran up to him and wrapped her arms around him, making sure that he was real. She tensed for a second as the fears at the back of her mind worked their way to the forefront. In truth, she had been worried about how she'd been brought back. Sure, she'd looked over the Project Lazarus files and the science checked out as far as she could tell, but there was still the small part of her that worried that she wasn't _Jane_. Those fears were instantly crushed as Garrus pulled her close to him.

"Spirits, Jane..." He murmured, her heart reacting forcefully to the sound of his voice. She heard Jacob clear his throat, pulling her back into the present. She pulled away from Garrus, quickly looking him over for injuries, her visor telling her that he was running low on medi-gel.

"How'd you end up here?" She asked, carefully keeping his gaze. It had been a few months for her but for him it had been two years. He had changed, that much was clear, but the question was; how much?

"I could ask you the same question." He countered playfully, before lowering his gaze. "I... I screwed up." He admitted, his voice too low to carry to Miranda and Jacob who were thankfully staying back and giving them space.

"Yeah, me too." Her thoughts were pulled back to the final moments before she died and how sorry she'd been for breaking her promise. Something she may now have a chance to fix. "But I told you I'd be back. I may be a little behind schedule but I made it." She hoped it was enough.

"Yeah, you did." He grinned at her and she grinned back. _Just like old times,_ she thought.

"So, Archangel, huh?" He groaned.

"I blame you for that, GuardianAngel." She laughed a little at that.

"Yeah, I've decided to change it again. I've thought of something way more appropriate."

"What?"

"Phoenix." His visor gave him the necessary information and he laughed in response.

"Okay then, Phoenix. How do we get out of this one?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"No escape plan, Archangel?" His eyes darkened as he looked away.

"No. No escape plan." Shepard felt her heart almost break as she realised just how close she had been cutting it.

"Well, with the three of us we've got a better chance of fighting them off." She reasoned, as she spotted scouts approaching their position.

"So, we wait for a gap in their defences. I like it." He looked at the scouts through his scope before offering it to her.

"We'll have to split up. You can do the most damage from up here and I can do the most down there. I'll leave Jacob with you." Garrus raised a brow plate at her.

"I'll be fine without him." She cut him off with a look.

"Garrus, I just got you back. I am _not _losing you again." At that he leant in closer, making her mouth go dry.

"Jane, I just got _you_ back." He countered and she knew that whatever she was feeling, he was feeling it too.

"So, we take one each. Miranda comes with me, Jacob stays with you." He regarded her for a second, she was till painfully aware of how close they were.

"You don't trust them." It wasn't a question, he knew her too well.

"No, I don't. Not yet. But I'm trying to give them a chance." He nodded as she stepped away to give orders to the two other humans before she left with the other woman, giving him a smile and nod as a kill counter for each of them appeared on his visor's display. _Just like old times..._ he thought as he positioned his rifle.

* * *

Jane was grinning as she headed back up to Garrus. She'd almost forgotten how good it felt to fight with him and every second she was fighting without him in the basement felt dull by comparison. She ran into the room just in time to see a gunship appear and gun down him down, causing her fury to build, her biotics flaring. But her glasses told her that he was okay. Hurt, but he would survive so she made her way over to him, barely stopping to shoot at the mercs being dropped off by the gunship. That was of course when Garrus tried to move and dove straight into the path of a rocket. The screens of her glasses flared red to get her attention as her fury cascaded through her causing her biotics to flare to dangerous levels.

The kind of levels that could take down a gunship in one blast.

As soon as it was down she collapsed next to Garrus, keeping herself awake through sheer force of will as she applied the end of her medi-gel to his wounds. She heard someone call a shuttle but she couldn't register anything other than the image immediately in front of her. The image of her best friend dying in her arms.

"_Don't do this to me Garrus. I need you._" She murmured in Turian. She figured she'd probably butchered it without a second voice box but she didn't care. Suddenly, he violently gasped for breath and was struggling to stay concious. He might just make it, she dared to hope as the shuttle arrived.

* * *

Garrus awoke under the haze of painkillers and tried to remember what had happened.

_He'd been trapped in his base._

_Shepard had saved him._

_The gunship had shown up and gunned him down._

_He'd been hit by a rocket._

_"Don't do this to me Garrus. I need you."_

Her Turian was excellent for someone missing a second voice-box but he wondered about the last phrase. It translated as 'I need you' but it was reserved for use between lovers, akin to saying 'I love you'. He figured that it was probably a translation error but his heart raced at the thought that it might not have been. He quickly discarded the thoughts, she needed a friend and he refused to let his feelings for her, whatever they may be, get in the way of that.

He finally opened his eyes and found himself in a medbay, similar to that of the Normandy. He looked over to his right and saw Dr Chakwas who gave him a quick smile.

"Ah, I see you're awake." Her voice was low. "You took quite a hit but I managed to fix you up. I've had to implant some cybernetics but nothing too drastic."

"How bad is it?" He asked, feeling the bandage over the side of his face.

"It'll heal." He nodded. He'd never been particularly vain but there was something about having half his face torn off that made his insides go cold. "You should rest." He was about to argue but as he sat up he realised that the sudden movement made his head swim. He was still filled with painkillers. He was about to disregard this and try to get up, to see Jane, when he saw that on his left side another bed had been pushed up against his and in it lay a sleeping Shepard.

"It was the only way I could get her to rest." The doctor explained. "After you got hit she took down the gunship with a single biotic blast. I don't even know how she was standing when she brought you here but she refused to leave your side so I improvised. You can both sleep here tonight so that I'll be alerted to any change in your conditions. You should both be fit for duty tomorrow. I would prefer it if you both waited a couple of days but I've treated you both enough times to know that that's not going to happen."

"What happened to her?" He asked, unsure if the doctor would give him an answer.

"Exactly what you know happened. She died and the Council pretended that she had been delusional. The Alliance was little better. A few months later Joker and I were contacted by Cerberus, they were working on bringing the commander back. It took them two years but they succeeded."

"So where are we now?"

"Cerberus also rebuilt the Normandy. I'll let the commander explain properly when she wakes up." With that the doctor left and Garrus turned to Jane's sleeping form.

"What have you gotten yourself into, _ani_?" He muttered, surprising himself by using the Turian term of endearment used between bondmates.

"Nothing I can't handle now that you're here." She muttered back, rubbing her eyes. "Did you just call me Annie?" He shook his head at his luck.

"No, it's a Turian term." She began to sit up a little but thought better of it as she was still exhausted.

"What does it mean?" Now he had three options; tell her the truth and deal with the consequences now, lie and deal with the consequences when she found out or refuse to tell her and hope that she wouldn't bother to look into it.

"I'll tell you later. I'm too tired to explain now." She frowned a little but decided to let it go. Mostly.

"Fine, baka. Have it your way." She smiled smugly, knowing his translator only worked with Common. "Hey EDI, what time is it?" She called out when she realised that she wasn't wearing her glasses or omni-tool.

"23:46 Shepard. The doctor has requested that you sleep in the med-bay tonight and will clear you both for duty tomorrow morning, provided your conditions continue to improve." A synthetic voice told her. He frowned, it had too many inflections to be a simple VI.

"Is that an AI?" Shepard smiled dryly.

"Welcome to life working with Cerberus." Her tone was flat.

"Are you sure about this? Those experiments we put a stop to were pretty brutal." She sighed, lying on her side to face him, keeping her voice low.

"No, I'm not. But the crew seem alright so I'm giving them a chance. Plus, I don't see a way around this. The Collectors are abducting entire human colonies which is bad enough in itself but they might be working with the Reapers. That's why I'm glad you're here with me. If I'm walking into hell, I want you by my side." He laughed a little at that and she became very aware of how close they were to each other. She was wearing her vest top and joggers while he was just wearing a pair of pants, his torso partially covered by bandages but there was still a lot to see and she surprised herself by liking every inch of it. She'd never found turians attractive before but this was _Garrus_ and she felt her breath hitch in her throat as she found herself wondering whether or not turians could kiss...

"You do realise this plan has me walking into hell too? Just like old times." She smiled at that, his voice pulling her mind back to their conversation. She couldn't help but frown a little, however, as she saw the bandage over his face.

"How bad?" He muttered, looking at her intently.

"Hell, Garrus, you were always ugly. Slap some face paint on there and no one will know the difference." She smiled and he chuckled a little, glad that the painkillers were still working. "Plus, it can't be worse than mine." She indicated towards her body and he looked down at her and saw that her skin was laced with glowing orange scars. But what caught his attention was that her vest had worked it's way up her body, leaving her waist a little exposed. He knew that for humans the waist wasn't a sensitive area so they weren't as bothered by it being exposed but it still made his breathing a little irregular, especially once her realised that the doctor had removed his own top to work on his wound. He stopped his mind from continuing down that path with extreme effort as he felt his groin plates begin to shift.

"Jane, you can barely notice them. Plus, they make you look badass." She smiled at that, her eyelids becoming heavy.

"Okay, we'd better actually get some sleep. We're picking up Professor Solus tomorrow."

"You mean the crazy salarian? Fun." He smiled as they drifted off to sleep.

**AN: YAY, they're back together! Yeah, I'm going to change the rating to M now. I still haven't decided if I'm actually going to write the smutty bits or just gloss over them but you can't be too careful. Hope you enjoyed!**

**Also, the second song is We Are Sex Bob-Omb by Sex Bob-Omb.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Garrus woke up to find the medbay empty. He frowned as he got up.

"Erm... AI?" He asked hesitantly, his mind still a little foggy with sedatives.

"The crew refer to me as EDI, Officer Vakarian." Garrus groaned.

"Sorry EDI. But please, just call me Garrus."

"Of course." She replied as his head cleared.

"Where's Shepard?" He asked as he found his omni-tool on the doctor's desk.

"She has just returned to the ship." He frowned at that.

"Returned?"

"Yes. She awoke early and started looking into acquiring the professor. That's when she found out that the professor was within a plague zone. The plague was not harmful to humans but it was lethal to turians. The doctor then informed her that your cybernetics were not taking as well as she had hoped and you needed to be kept sedated for an extra six hours to aid the healing process." Garrus shook his head. He didn't believe the sedation was _completely_ necessary but then he also figured that had he been awake nothing would have kept him from Shepard's side and she knew that.

"So, where is she now?"

"In her quarters. She has requested that you give her half an hour to 'get rid of the Vorcha guts'." Garrus chuckled a little, making his face hurt. He figured whatever drugs Chakwas had given him had worn off a while ago. Just as he thought that, the doctor appeared.

"Good to see you up Garrus. I'll just check on your cybernetics and if everything's healing nicely I'll discharge you." He nodded as she activated her omni-tool.

"So, what was wrong in the first place?" He inquired, trying not to move too much.

"These cybernetics are based on the ones used to reconstruct Shepard. They weren't designed for turian physiology so I've had to tweak them a bit. Well, they're working now and you should be able to take the bandage off in a few months and it should be healed, apart from scars, in six." He nodded, scars were a small price to pay for taking a rocket to the face.

"So, I can go?" The doctor nodded and he headed out to explore the ship. As he walked into the mess hall, he almost walked into Miranda.

"Officer Vakarian-"

"People need to stop calling me that." He muttered. It reminded him of his father.

"Would you prefer Archangel?" She asked, misunderstanding him.

"No, just Garrus." She nodded in response. She didn't seem too friendly but Shepard had decided to give this crew a chance and he wasn't going to make things difficult.

"Alright then. The commander has cleared you for access to the main battery." Clearly the woman didn't agree with that decision but she didn't say anything. "Because, and I quote, 'there's no Mako for (her) to destroy'." Garrus smiled at that before thanking Miranda. That was when the cook got his attention.

"You must be Vakarian. I'm afraid I don't have much more than the standard ration packs for dextros at the minute but word is we're headed for the Citadel next and the commander promised she'd pick up some fancier grub next time we were there so if you have any favourites just give me a shout." Garrus nodded, a little taken aback by how friendly this Cerberus member was being to him.

"Thanks. I appreciate it." He said before heading to the CIC. The first thing he saw when exiting the elevator was a red haired woman with her left arm in a sling.

"You must be Garrus." She said as he exited the elevator. He nodded in response.

"That's me. And you are?"

"Yeoman Chambers, but you can call me Kelly." He nodded again.

"Okay, Kelly. Did you need me for something?" Something about the red head unnerved him.

"No, just wanted to see how you were settling in." He shrugged.

"Fine, I guess." She smiled.

"Good. The commander has certainly seemed to relax more since you came on board. She's still a little scary but now she doesn't seem as highly strung." He almost laughed at that last part. Sure, Jane could be terrifying but usually it was only during battle or when someone _really_ pissed her off. "Part of my job is keeping an eye on the mental health of the crew so if you ever want to talk, I'm here." He nodded.

"Thanks, I guess." She nodded before returning to her work, leaving him able to talk to Joker but he instead found himself walking into the armoury, curious to talk to Jacob more. He hadn't really spoken to him when they were being attacked. He had gotten the sense that the two Cerberus operatives weren't too thrilled to have him on board.

"Hey." He said, walking into the armoury to see Jacob working on one of the rifles. "Chakwas took my guns off me and I figured they might have ended up here." Jacob nodded.

"Yeah, I put your stuff over there along with a new rifle the commander picked up for you today. Something about saying sorry for going on the mission without you." Garrus just nodded as he inspected the weapon. He figured that Cerberus paid well but he didn't think that it was _this_ well. Jacob watched him for a moment before talking to him again. "I'm sorry if Miranda and I were a little cold when we first picked you up. Shepard was keeping to herself and it had us more than a little worried. We figured it was a trust issue since she spent the entire trip to Omega chatting with Joker but we feared that when you came aboard she'd close off to us even more in favour of her old crew. As it happens, you seem to have had the opposite effect." Garrus shrugged at this.

"Shepard trusts _everyone_ and I have never seen her judge someone without giving them a chance even when that put her in danger. She knows this so she was holding off judgement of you for as long as possible."

"So, why does having you on the ship change that?"

"Because I've got her back no matter what and she knows it. It makes giving someone a chance easier when it's not as dangerous." Jacob nodded at that.

"Alright then. Thanks Vakarian. I'm glad you're on board, she seems happier for it." Garrus nodded before heading back out and towards the cockpit to talk to Joker.

"We leave you alone for two years and you end up surrounded by enemies and taking a rocket to the face. That is so you, Garrus." Garrus laughed at the bad joke as he sat down next to Joker.

"Hey, it was working well right up until that last month." He joked back but his heart grew heavy at the thought of the crew that he had let down. To Joker's credit he didn't ask.

"Well, I'm just glad you're back. Shepard refused to talk to anyone else on the ship but it was like she had two years of energy to get rid of. We spent three hours arguing about which super heroes could beat each other in a fight. It was like talking to a salarian hopped up on red sand."

"That bad, huh?" Joker shook his head.

"If you want to know just go talk to our new crew member and you'll get a fair idea of what she was like."

"The professor, right?" Joker nodded.

"Yeah, she picked up him and some merc called Zaeed. Zaeed scares the crap out of me in a straight up merc way, Solus is scary in a mad scientist kind of way."

"I bet Shepard loves him." Joker laughed.

"Yeah. I think she's in there now."

"Well, I was but listening to you two is way more fun." Shepard said as she approached. Garrus frowned a little, how had she heard from so far away?

"Gah! Don't sneak up on me, I'll break bones by jumping out of fright!" She laughed as she turned to Garrus.

"Hey, got a minute? I want to talk to you." He shrugged.

"Sure." He followed her back into the elevator as she hit the button for her quarters.

"So, I know you're probably mad that I didn't take you with me to get Mordin but I figured getting sick wouldn't help you heal so..." He sighed.

"Jane, I'm not mad at you. Well, I'm a little mad, but I get it. Although, I refuse to be left behind for any mission ever again." She grinned at that as they entered her cabin.

"Good because I don't plan to. It's so weird fighting without you..."

"Nice place." He said as he entered the huge cabin and she shrugged.

"I guess. I don't really like it. There's too much space."

"Too _much_ space?" She shrugged again.

"I grew up on ships and at my Aunts I shared Sarah's room. I've never owned an apartment or anything so this is weird." She put her hands on her hips and he realised that she was wearing an all black outfit made up of a sleeveless, high necked top and jeans with heeled boots. He raised a brow plate.

"What are you wearing?" She shrugged again.

"What? I'm not allowed to wear nice things?"

"You look good but also like you're about to pull a knife from your boot." She laughed at that and shrugged again.

"That's what I was going for. I still don't fully trust Cerberus and I want them to take me seriously. Plus, I like this outfit. It makes me look badass." He had to agree with that but he also found it to be very tight and he was more than a little distracted by it.

"Now I understand what Chambers meant by you being 'scary'." She blushed a little, ducking her head.

"Yeah, that might be to do with something else..." He grinned a little.

"What did you do?" She pulled a face.

"It wasn't my fault! She's a psychologist or whatever and she has my psych profile. It's her fault if she ignores it!"

"So, what did she do?"

"I wasn't talking to anyone and she decided to fix it by hugging me. She caught me by surprise and... I flipped her." She looked a little sheepish, folding her arms.

"Well, that explains the sling." She narrowed her eyes at him.

"Laugh it up, Garrus." But she smiled, putting her hands on her hips again.

"So, how's the new crew member?" He changed topics, hoping to take his mind off of her. She sat down on the sofa and indicated that he should do the same.

"Which one?" She asked as he sat down next to her.

"Both, I guess."

"I like Zaeed simply because I know where I stand with him. He's here for the paycheck and for revenge. I can deal with that. Plus I took him with me to get Mordin and he's pretty good in a fight. And Mordin? He's brilliant! I talked to him for an hour and we figured out how to make adjustments to the settings on my cybernetics. We turned up my hearing _and_ my eyesight. Okay, check this out; I'm going to turn off my translator and then you say something. Okay, go."

"What do you want me to say?" She smiled as she concentrated for a moment.

"Mostly confusion with a little trepidation. I can hear sub-harmonics now. I can only understand them as far as I researched while Mordin was setting it up but I figured you could teach me so that I don't have to rely on my translator when I'm talking to you. I mean, I can't use the sub-harmonics so I couldn't speak turian but I could at least hear it. Plus I may have a solution to that problem too." She spoke at a million miles a minute and he rolled his eyes so that she could see. She always got like this when she was excited about a new project but if he didn't stop her, she'd be talking about it all night. Not that he didn't want to talk to her all night but he had some other things to say.

"Does the solution involve more tinkering with your cybernetics?" She looked a little guilty.

"_Maybe_... But it's fine. We're running everything by Chakwas and she made me promise to be careful and stop at the first sign of it going wrong. Plus I want to add Turian to my list of languages."

"How long is that list now?" She grinned at him.

"Human Common, English (I know HC is just a variation of English so it's not that hard but _still_), Spanish, Mandarin, a little Japanese, a good chunk of Asari and bits and pieces of Turian. You know me, I don't like relying on technology, you never know when it's going to break down." He grinned at her logic.

"Yeah, I know. Maybe we could watch a Turian vid without translators and see how much you pick up." She grinned at him before yawning.

"Sounds great but not tonight. I don't think I could concentrate."

"Maybe I should go. Let you sleep."

"No! I mean... I've been having nightmares." She admitted sheepishly. "This room's too big and I keep remembering... anyway, I don't know whether it was because I was so exhausted or because I wasn't alone but I didn't have any last night so can we just watch something I've already seen? I'll probably fall asleep in the first half hour and then you can, you know, do whatever."

"Do whatever?" He joked and she blushed.

"Well, you've slept in my room before and I don't know if you've got anywhere else set up yet. So, whatever." She shrugged, looking nervous.

"Jane, I'm fine with the couch." She smiled and went into the bathroom to get changed. He had put his armour on over his pants that he had been wearing in the medbay. He'd even found a white t-shirt which he was now wearing under his chest plate. He took the armour off and felt strangely self conscious as she walked out of the bathroom in her vest top and joggers. She then walked over to the bed and climbed in.

"I'm not falling asleep on the sofa, Garrus. Just come sit next to me and you can move or whatever after I go to sleep. Geez, we've fallen asleep next to each other before." They had but it had always been an accident, never planned out. But he had to agree that lying next to her wasn't so bad as long as he kept his eyes focused on the screen in front of him.

"So, what are we going to watch?" She flicked through her selection before coming across something that made her eyes light up.

"I know! Star Wars! This is brilliant." He frowned.

"Why does it say episode four?" She laughed a little at that.

"You watch four through six and then one through three. It's the order in which they were released." They were about five minutes in before she spoke again. "Garrus?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for keeping it safe. I owe you one." He looked over her head and saw her book on the night stand, still in the same condition it had been in when she'd given it to him. It was the one possession that he had valued. He figured that she had visited his apartment and gotten his stuff for him while she'd been on Omega.

"No problem. And Jane?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for the crazy expensive new gun." She laughed a little and shrugged.

"No problem."


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

**AN: I'm going to assume that you guys have either seen the 1997 kid's cartoon film Anastasia or never plan on watching it but just in case this is a Spoiler Alert.**

Garrus had woken up next to Jane once again with a problem that made him groan in frustration. He was glad that he was up first as it gave him a chance to put his armour on to hide the problem before she woke up. It wasn't the most comfortable solution but it was the only option he could think of at that moment. He was attaching his chest plate when she woke up. She looked over at him and smiled sleepily before her eyes grew wide and she threw her hands in the air.

"No nightmares!" She grinned as she got out of bed. "Thanks Garrus. Have you been up for ages?" He shook his head.

"Not really. You sleep as little as a turian, you know." She grabbed a bottle from her mini fridge with one hand as she tied her hair back with the other.

"It could be all the sugar and caffeine." She said, smiling as she chugged down half of the bottle. "How long until we arrive at the Citadel, EDI?"

"Half an hour." The AI replied and Garrus frowned.

"So, does she have listening devices in here?" She shook her head.

"She did but I deactivated them all. Except for one which I can turn on and off as I please. She can use the speaker to talk to me but she can't hear my response unless I want her to." He nodded, that seemed reasonable enough.

"So, what's the agenda for today?" Jane groaned in response, pulling herself up onto her desk, letting her legs rest on the seat of her chair.

"Anderson and the Council want to see me and we have to pick up a thief but that should all be done by lunch."

"Why do we need a thief?" He asked, leaning over the back of the chair.

"Why do we need a smartass vigilante?" He narrowed his eyes at that and she stuck her tongue out.

"I bring the style." She laughed, finishing her drink before leaping down from the desk.

"That you do. Anyway, I'd better get ready. I figured we could get something nice for lunch and maybe go see a movie. I've given the crew a day of shore-leave so we might as well take advantage of it."

"Sounds like a plan." He agreed as he left the room, leaving her to bang her head against the cold tiles of the bathroom wall. That man was going to kill her, she thought as hormones raged through her body.

* * *

Shepard had never liked politicians but she had respected the Council. As much as their decisions had made her life difficult while she was hunting Saren they had made sense and, as she had to stop herself from telling Udina, it wasn't their job to make her life easy. But when they dismissed the Reaper threat it took all of her concentration to not let her biotics flare. If they backed her and she was wrong, then nothing would happen and Council space would end up in a better position to defend itself from any future threat. But if they didn't back her and she was right, then thousands would die needlessly. So, of course, they didn't back her. Although, she would take what she could get so she smiled as they let her remain a Spectre. So, to say she was in a bad mood when she met up with Garrus was putting it mildly.

"Hey." She said, sitting next to him on a bench.

"Hey. What's with the face?" She frowned, unable to sit comfortably in her armour.

"Dealing with the Council is exhausting... bunch of pendejos... Can we just pick something up to eat on the ship?" He ignored the word his translator didn't pick up, assuming that it was unsavoury. It was unusual for her to outright insult people so he figured that whatever they'd done, they had put her in a foul mood.

"Sure, what did you have in mind?" His sub-harmonics took on a reassuring tone and she smiled a little before sighing, trying to think. She was very tempted to go somewhere with purely automated service but her stomach was demanding something specific.

"I saw a ramen place after I picked up Kasumi. I don't know if they do dextro versions, though..." They got up and headed towards the place she was talking about. They didn't do dextro versions but the place next door sold his favourite kind of fast food.

"So, how is the new crew member?" He asked as they walked away with their food and Shepard's face lit up a little.

"She's awesome. Very theatrical with her introduction. I think we'll get on just fine."

"So, the meeting with the Council was really bad, huh?" He asked as they boarded the ship and she sighed, hitting the button for her quarters once they were in the elevator.

"It wasn't _terrible_, I mean they could have been a lot worse. Hell, they could have arrested me for working with Cerberus but apparently saving their skins has paid off. It was just stressful." She admitted, dropping her food down on the table before heading into the bathroom to change. "Having to meet Kasumi for the first time was stressful enough but she didn't really talk to me face to face so it was easy enough to deal with. I was just glad the councillors used holograms instead of talking to me in person. It's just exhausted me for the day. Hell, I could barely order my lunch without stressing out. I don't want to have to deal with anyone but you for the rest of the day." She told him as she returned to the table and dropped down onto the sofa, frowning at his meal.

"Is that meat, wrapped in meat?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah. The outer meat is dried so that you can use it like a container to eat the filling." She nodded, leaning back again.

"Oh, like a pasty except dried meat instead of pastry. Cool."

"So, what do you have?"

"Prawn dumpling ramen with dorayaki for after." She took the plastic lid off of what appeared to be a cardboard bucket and picked up noodles from inside with two sticks. "So, how about we watch one of your vids? I'll turn my translator off and we can see how much Turian I've picked up." He nodded before picking one. "Fleet and Flotilla... Garrus is this a romance film?" She tried not to smile but failed miserably.

"There are explosions as well..." He muttered, looking a little embarrassed.

"Okay, okay, stick it on." She said, grinning.

* * *

"So, did you actually understand any of that?" He asked as the film ended and she smiled.

"Yeah. I looked up a couple of words but mostly it was just cultural things I didn't understand and I figured I'd ask you once it finished." She hadn't bothered to stick her translator back on. His would translate her own words but she preferred not listening to his voice through the translator's synthetic overtones.

"Okay, so ask away."

"Was all that stuff about bondmates actually how it happens in real life or was it exaggerated for the camera?"

"No, that was a fairly accurate representation." She frowned at that.

"Really? Okay, let me get this straight. Mates are like husband and wife, right?"

"Right."

"And turians are expected to mate with someone from a clan with similar standing to their own."

"Right, although clans with lower standing tend to not be as uptight about it."

"Okay, so it's not quite arranged marriages but it's not entirely free will either." She frowned a little at that. It seemed a bit archaic to her.

"That's a fair analogy, I think."

"Fair enough but he was from a very high up clan. Everyone was up in arms about him not marrying the other turian until he said the word 'bondmate'. Then nobody really batted an eyelid when he ran off with the quarian girl." She was frowning a little and Garrus sighed, his sub-harmonics trilling as he clearly trying to figure out how to explain it.

"So, humans fall in and out of love, right?" Her frown deepened.

"I guess..."

"Well turians don't. They don't fall in love easily and when they do..."

"It's the kind of epic love found in fairytales?" He nodded at that.

"Yeah and they're bondmates." He said, sheepishly. Damn, this was awkward to explain. Especially to her.

"So it's like the turian equivalent of finding 'the one' except it's officially recognised as a thing?"

"Basically. If a turian finds their bondmate then no one would even consider trying to tear them apart. Their clan may disown them, although that's rare, but they would never even try to separate them."

"But why do they just accept that he's telling the truth? He could have been lying to get out of marrying the other one."

"It's not something you can lie about."

"What do you mean?"

"Turians have a really good sense of smell so we rely more on pheromones for certain things more than other species. Particularly, mating. It's not a great sense and you probably couldn't figure it out without them telling you but once you know, it pretty much acts as proof that they're bondmates."

"So, how does a person know that they've found their bondmate? I mean, they can't sense their own pheromones." He looked away awkwardly before speaking.

"It's like... you're perfectly fine and then out of no where this person shows up and changes your entire life just by being near you. Suddenly everything that was great about the world before is dull and boring unless they're there too. You couldn't imagine not being with them and the very thought of it is enough to kill you inside." She tried not to blush as she realised that he was describing her feelings for him. She took a few moments to find her voice again.

"Sounds like you know a lot about it." He shrugged, looking awkward.

"My parents were bondmates." He explained, still looking awkward.

"Humans don't have the pheromones thing so there's no way for us to confirm it in others and some people are dumb enough to throw words like 'true love' around when they don't mean it so it's not always taken seriously. Hell, a lot of people don't even believe that love like that exists." She tried not to act awkward and sheepish but it was hard.

"Do you?" He asked, a little hesitantly. His sub-harmonics told her that he was wondering if he had overstepped a line so she smiled at him reassuringly.

"I always wanted to when I was growing up but, like I say, there's no real way to see proof in others so I was always a little doubtful but... I figured even if it was all a lie, it was the greatest lie we had."

"What about now?" She tried not to blush at the question. What was she supposed to say? Now I know it's true because I've fallen completely, head-over-heels in love with you? She felt her mind begin to race with panic at the thought of actually telling him how she felt so she did the first thing that came into her head. She sang.

"_I thought love was only true in fairytales,  
Meant for someone else but not for me,  
Love was out to get me,  
That's the way it seemed,  
Disappointment haunted all my dreams_

_Then I saw her face, now I'm a believer,  
Not a trace of doubt in my mind,  
I'm in love, I'm a believer,  
I couldn't leave her if I tried._

"I always liked that song." She shrugged, hoping he wouldn't pry any further. Thankfully, he opted for changing the subject.

"So, what love stories did you like growing up?" He asked and she looked a little shy, fiddling with her ponytail.

"There was this one kid's vid that my gran, my dad's mum, had that I really liked." He frowned and his sub-harmonics voiced confusion.

"Did you use a different word for mother? My translator didn't pick it up."

"Yeah. My gran lives in Edinburgh so she speaks English and she gets really annoyed when I use American words like mom, even if they're HC now."

"So, what's the vid about?"

"It's an old cartoon called Anastasia about a young princess whose family is all killed apart from her grandmother but they get separated and she hits her head so she doesn't remember who she is."

"This sounds a little dark for a kids vid." He pointed out and she laughed.

"All of the best kids vids are a little dark. Anyway, she grows up in an orphanage and when she'd old enough she leaves in the hopes of finding her family and the only clue she has is a necklace that says 'together in Paris'. Then she finds two conmen, Dimitri and Vlad, looking for an actress to play the part of the Princess Anastasia so that they can collect the reward money from her grandmother. They tell her that she might be the princess and she agrees to play along for the chance to go to Paris and along the way she falls in love with Dimitri. But the man who killed her family is still trying to get her so they barely make it to Paris and along the way Dimitri figures out that she really is the princess. But then she finds out that he had been lying to her in the beginning so she tells him to leave her alone, thinking that he never cared about her. But then her grandmother tells her that he never took the reward money and that she doesn't have to stay and be the princess to have a family so she gives it all up and she and Dimitri run away together." She smiled at the memory of watching the vid a thousand times at her gran's house. "Sorry if I didn't tell it very well. I suck at telling stories." She admitted, shrugging.

"Yeah, I think we'll let someone else recount the tale of how we stopped Saren and the geth and then took down the Collectors and then defeated all the Reapers." She laughed at that.

"Maybe that can be your job. Garrus Vakarian: Awesome Story Teller. I can see it now." Then it was his turn to laugh.

"At least I'd do a better job than you. Next time, I'll just watch the vid." He teased and she almost jumped up with an idea.

"That's it! We should totally get drunk and watch children's vids." She said excitedly and he raised a brow plate.

"That actually sounds like fun." She went over to her mini fridge and surprised him by pulling out two beers, one levo and one dextro.

"Okay, shall we watch Anastasia first or have I ruined the ending for you?" He shook his head.

"No, I'll watch it." She spent a few minutes finding it and as she got ready to put it on, he spoke again. "I sort of feel bad, though. You're going to all this trouble to learn Turian and I only speak a little Human Common." She shrugged.

"Yeah but I already speak a ton of languages. You only speak Turain Common and what Asari you learnt in school. I grew up on ships so everyone spoke Common but most people spoke either English, Spanish or Mandarin as well. It's not hard to pick up languages as a kid and it's easier when you're an adult if you're already multi-lingual." She reasoned causing him to shrug.

"I know but it would be nice to be able to understand you without the translator. I'm pretty much limited to 'hello', 'my name is Officer Vakarian', 'you're under arrest', the list of rights and pretty much every swear word in Common and some in other languages." She shook her head, smiling.

"Being a cop leave you with a weird-ass skill set, huh?" He nodded.

"That it does. But my point still stands."

"Well that's why I'm learning how to do sub-harmonics with my cybernetics. If I can speak Turian then neither of us will need translators to communicate."

"I know, I just feel like you're going to a lot of effort and I'm not." He looked a little sheepish and she shrugged.

"So then I'll teach you some Human Common. Just not right now. Right now, I want to get drunk." He grinned at that.

"Me too, but tomorrow you have to start teaching me HC and I'll keep teaching you Turian." She grinned back.

"Deal. Now let's watch this film."


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

"New crew member settling in without problems?" Mordin asked as he checked the data on his screens. Shepard was trying to stay as still as possible as he tweaked her cybernetics but this experiment required her to be talking pretty much non-stop. Something she wasn't great at doing...

"Jack? Yeah, I like her." Shepard wasn't sure what else to say.

"Profile suggests she is unstable." He commented and she tried not to frown.

"She's just angry and she doesn't know how to vent that anger in a socially acceptable manner. That doesn't make her _unstable_." Her words had more venom than she meant them to.

"No offence intended. Reaction indicates empathy with Jack?" She sighed a little, putting effort into not moving.

"Of course I have empathy with her. I put up with a lot of crap from other people but there's only so much a person can cope with before they reach their limit. I used to reach my limit a lot when I was young and my reactions were never... pleasant." She admitted.

"But you learnt to control yourself after reaching your limit." She laughed a little at that.

"Nope. Other people just grew up enough to stop pushing me. Like I said, it takes a lot for me to reach that limit. Like, six months of solid emotional blackmail." Mordin raised an eyebrow at that.

"Oddly specific." He pointed out but she ignored it.

"Point is she's taken a lot of crap and she's reached her limit for it. I can't blame her for that but I can help her move past it. Plus, she has the_ best_ stories." Mordin simply nodded as he worked on her implants and she tried not to flinch.

"That should do it. Try talking in Turian." She frowned as she figured out what to say.

"_Is it working? Am I butchering the pronunciation? I bet I am..._" It was weird to hear her voice in two tones.

"Pronunciation fine, Shepard. Implant working surprisingly well." He indicated that she could sit up so she did, deciding to keep practising her Turian.

"_So the simulated second voice voice box is controlled almost entirely by my subconscious, like an actual turian's?_"

"Yes. Very little input required. But will only work when speaking Turian. Sub-harmonics will always sound but will only be heard by turians, salarians and drell. Suggest practice controlling sub-harmonics. Makes emotions easier to read." She nodded.

"_Alright then. Wait, this doesn't affect my singing voice, does_ _it?_" Mordin frowned a little.

"It shouldn't. Should try just to be sure." Shepard nodded. Mordin was the only person on board she felt comfortable singing in front of apart from Garrus. Mostly because working on a difficult problem was much more fun when singing a duet.

"_Something has changed within me,  
Something is not the same,  
I'm through with playing by the rules,  
Of someone else's game,  
Too late for second-guessing,  
Too late to go back to sleep,  
It's time to trust my instincts,  
Close my eyes: and leap!_

_It's time to try,  
Defying gravity,  
I think I'll try,  
Defying gravity,  
And you can't pull me down!_

"_Did that sound alright?_" She asked, her sub-harmonics trilling with worry.

"Sounded fine. Implant doesn't activate when singing." She nodded, a little relieved at that.

_"Guess it's time to go see Garrus and show off. Thanks for your help Mordin._" She jumped down from the table and got ready to leave.

"No problem. Actually thought of more adjustments I could make. Will keep you informed if I make any progress." She nodded.

"_Thanks Mordin_." She said as she headed down to the Main Battery.

* * *

Garrus was in the middle of some calibrations when he was interrupted by sub-harmonics trilling with excitement. He almost jumped, thinking it was another turian until he turned and saw Shepard standing behind him.

"Guess what?" He frowned for a few moments.

"Wait, that didn't come through my translator." He said and she grinned, shaking her head.

"Nope, Mordin and I applied the changes to my vocal implants this morning." She was practically jumping up and down with excitement.

"You know, this whole thing was born out of hatred for your translator but you have to rely on your implants for this to work. I don't really see a distinction between the two." She sighed, her sub-harmonics chiming in as she leant on the terminal.

"If my implants cut out then I'm pretty much dead anyway. I don't like relying on them any more than my translator but I have no option with them." Her sub-harmonics dropped in pitch and he put a hand on her shoulder. She had always hated relying on technology, firmly believing that if she didn't know how it worked and couldn't repair it herself she shouldn't be using it, but here she was relying on cybernetic implants to survive. His sub-harmonics trilled in an effort to comfort her and she smiled at him.

"You're picking up Turian fast." He commented and she shrugged.

"Yeah, I guess. I already knew a lot of the basics, I could just never speak most of it." She was suddenly aware of his hand of her shoulder and she blushed a little, her sub-harmonics chiming in. Her eyes widened a little as she tried to figure out what she had just subconsciously said. She didn't know exactly but she could guess and his responded in a way that she knew meant confusion mixed with something else she couldn't recognise. "I think they may still need a little tweaking, though. Especially the sub-harmonics." She covered, hoping that her face wasn't bright red.

"Yeah. Don't want to be saying things you don't mean." She shook her head, deciding that maybe having an element to her voice that was controlled almost entirely by her subconscious wasn't such a good idea. She remembered Mordin's advice about needing practice to control the sub-harmonics and thought that it might be a good idea to visit him once she had done her rounds for the day and practice for a few hours. Maybe longer...

"Anyway, I'd better get going. I need to do my rounds and stuff. I just came to show off." He nodded, his sub-harmonics still trilling in a way she couldn't recognise. She figured she still needed practice reading them. "See you tomorrow morning?" She got ready to leave, putting all of her effort into not vocalising her embarrassment.

"Yeah. Shepard?" He asked as she was almost out of the door.

"Yeah?" She asked, unsure how much longer she could stop her sub-harmonics from sounding.

"Have you decided what you're going to do with the krogan yet?" She clamped down harder on her sub-harmonics, begging her subconscious to not give her away.

"No, not yet." She lied. She'd always been good at lying, she had to be, but this was _Garrus_ and she suspected that he would catch on even without her new sub-harmonics ratting her out.

"_Jane_..." He groaned and she gave him her best innocent look.

"What?" She asked, clasping her hands behind her back to fight her compulsion her mess with her hair.

"You're going to let him out, aren't you?" She keep up her poker face.

"Like I said, I haven't decided yet." She tried to look earnest and it would have worked on anyone else but he _knew_ she was lying.

"You do know how dangerous this is, don't you?" His sub-harmonics trilled with anger and a little fear. Her heart was touched by the sentiment, that he was scared for her, but she knew that she had to do it regardless.

"We can argue about this when I've actually made the decision. I'm still not sure." She sighed in frustration, hoping he would buy it.

"Shepard, just cut the crap. You were going to wake him up without telling me so that I wouldn't try to stop you." She flinched a little as he called her Shepard. He only did that when the crew could hear him but the door had closed once again. She let her sub-harmonics sound once again, allowing her to convey the fact that all of her frustration, awkwardness and fear had been ignited into anger.

"So what if I was, Vakarian? It's none of your business how I run my ship. I respect you opinion as a friend but you have already given it and I have taken it into consideration. This is my final decision. Deal with it." She growled those last words before storming out of the battery, her biotics flickering lightly over her skin as she went. If he was going to act like an ass, she reasoned, she would treat him like one.

* * *

"Hey Mordin." She said in turian (she wanted as much practice as possible) as she walked into his lab and he frowned at the bruising on her neck.

"Have you seen Chakwas about that?" She shook her head.

"It's not that bad." He gave her a look and she sighed, slumping against the wall.

"So, I woke up Grunt, the krogan, and he attacked me. It's all fine now but Garrus thought it was a bad idea to wake him up and he was being a bundun about it so I may have yelled at him. I can't handle an I-told-you-so right now and he might see me if I go to Chakwas." Mordin nodded and handed her a pack of medi-gel. He didn't question the word his translator didn't pick up. Shepard rarely swore in common.

"Bruising should be gone by tomorrow." She sighed, applying the medi-gel.

"I didn't just come in here for that, although I do appreciate it. I, erm, may need help practising controlling my sub-harmonics." Mordin gave her another look.

"You didn't seem bothered before. Was there something you didn't want Vakarian to know?" She stopped herself from groaning at that but her sub-harmonics chimed in for her. She didn't want anyone finding out about her feelings for Garrus, not even Mordin.

"Yeah, that I was about to wake up a potentially dangerous krogan without back-up or armour." She rolled her eyes. He just gave her another look.

"Yes. Can see what you mean. Sub-harmonics very clear." She sighed at that.

"So, teach me to stop it. There is no way all species with sub-harmonics are this open. You'd never be able to lie to each other." Mordin shook his head.

"No. Like facial expressions. You learn to control it as you grow up."

"Well, I'm a quick study so you've got until tomorrow morning to help me figure out how." He frowned at that.

"Why tomorrow morning?" She shrugged.

"That's when we'll be arriving at Horizon. I'd rather not be on a mission with Garrus with my sub-harmonics telling him everything I'm thinking." He nodded.

"Planning on apologising?" She sighed again.

"I don't know. Probably. I mean, I had a point. I _am_ in charge and I wouldn't take that crap from anyone else so I don't see why he gets to question my command decisions like that."

"Understandable. Protective instinct. Hormone driven." She shrugged.

"I don't really care what caused it, he needs to knock it off. He can't get mad every time I make a decision he doesn't like." She began to notice the patterns in her sub-harmonics and tried to filter out the ones associated with her feelings for Garrus. It was taking effort and she was making mistakes but it was a start.

"Only argues with decisions that put you in direct danger." She groaned at that, rolling her eyes again.

"Yeah, but that's every other day Mordin. I'll end up apologising, I shouldn't have been so harsh with him, but I think he needs to cool off for a bit. We were both in the wrong and he's too damn hot-headed to see it right away." Mordin regarded her for a moment.

"Do you wish to change the subject? Do not wish to cause upset." She shook her head.

"No, upset is what I need. Or, at least, I need to be talking about Garrus to try and figure out how to shut up my sub-harmonics. It's the best way to get them to show up." She sat down and got ready to be bombarded with questions as she worked out which sub-harmonics were related to her feelings for Garrus and carefully figured out how to shut them up.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

Jane sat on her sofa hugging her knees close to her chest. The door beeped but she didn't respond. Whoever it was could wait. After a minute the door opened and she whipped her head around quickly, her ponytail swinging, to see who it was. Garrus walked in with two trays of food in hand. He put one down in front of her before sitting next to her.

"I thought we agreed that you wouldn't break in here unless it was an emergency." She muttered into her knees, speaking once again in Turian with her translator offline, her sub-harmonics laced with hurt.

"This counts. You used more biotics than usual today, dealing with those husks. Normally you'd be finished your third litre of pop and downing your fifth 'hotdog' or whatever other fried monstrosity you levos eat."

"Yeah well, that was pre-reboot." He put his hand on hers and she realised he wasn't wearing his gloves. She wasn't really surprised by how much she liked the feel of his skin on hers but it took all of her effort to stop her sub-harmonics from trilling in response to his touch. He was her only friend in this goddamn galaxy and she wasn't about to screw it up.

"No, that was last mission. Eat." Jane didn't feel quite up to solid food yet so she grabbed the bottle of red-orange pop instead. Garrus just nodded but she knew what he meant. 'Fine for now but I'll press again if you don't eat soon.' His concern made her smile for the first time since seeing Kaidan again.

"I wanted to apologise for yesterday. You're right, I can't get huffy when you make command decisions that put you in danger because that's every other day. I just don't want to lose you again." He admitted, his sub-harmonics telling her that he was, indeed, sorry.

"I know, Garrus. I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have bitten your head off like that." She sighed, still keeping her knees clutched to her chest.

"So, are you going to tell me why you're so upset?" She sighed again, pushing her glasses up her nose.

"I just... it's difficult to grasp that two years have gone by. I was _dead_. It's... I'm not sure I can ever get my head around it. I've read the Project Lazarus files and I understand the science but there are those moments when it clicks and I think _that was me_. It's more than a little unnerving. And I can't help but wonder if Kaidan was right. Am I doing the right thing? I know Anderson can't help and the Council are being... stubborn-" 'Are talking out their asses' he substituted for her, knowing that she was doing that thing where she believed that no one was at fault but her. "-as usual but Cerberus? Is there no other alternative?" Garrus tightened his grip on her hand as she stared at him, eyes hollow from self-blame. He knew that it had been bothering her anyway but Alenko had managed to rub salt in the wound and brought her to the point at which she doubted herself.

"Jane, Kaidan's an ass." She looked as if she was about to interrupt but his sub-harmonics told her that he wasn't finished so she kept quiet. "The Collectors need to be stopped. Thousands of lives depend on it. And no other option gives the same odds of success as Cerberus. If the Alliance or the Council had stepped up you would have sold Cerberus out to them in a second but they didn't. _They_ left you no choice, no matter what Alenko says." She smiled at that, pulling her legs under her and reaching for her food. How was it that he always knew what to say?

"Thanks. I guess it was just weird... Kaidan's puppy dog eyes were a constant on the SR1. No matter what happened I could rely on him to try and flirt with me, but now? I guess it's just another reminder of the two years that have passed. Everyone's changed or moved on and I'm still the same." Garrus's eyes locked onto hers and his sub-harmonics trilled in a comforting way.

"Alenko's an ass and you don't need him." He repeated. "There are still those of us who care about you. Hey, I'm still here." She smiled, her sub-harmonics trilling sadly.

"I know you are Garrus but... even you've changed. Grown up. I'm not saying it's a bad thing but... dammit, I should have been there. I left you alone for two years Garrus. How can you not hate me for that?" She worked hard to keep her tears from falling, humming gently under her breath to regulate her breathing. Garrus didn't mind, it was a trick she'd used quite a few times in his presence and he was used to it.

"It wasn't your fault. It was no one's fault, except the Collectors but I didn't know that at the time. I was angry at first when I heard that you'd died but it quickly became clear that no one was at fault. I remembered what you had said to me one day on the SR1, about how people always tell you that things could be worse and how you always point out that actually they couldn't but they also couldn't be better. Situations are what they are and you can't change them, but you can accept them and deal with them. You didn't choose to leave me alone, Jane. It was just something that happened, so I don't blame you for it. Not one bit." She smiled again, her sub-harmonics taking on a different tone before quieting all together. He'd noticed her exercising more control over them since the day before when she'd said they were malfunctioning and it had almost sounded like she- No, he wouldn't think along those lines. She needed him right now as a friend, nothing more.

"See, you have grown up." She joked, smiling. "Does this mean you're older than me? Do the two years I was dead count in terms of age?"

"I think it's the number of years from birth to now." But she shook her head.

"No, I'm definitely not any older. Yeah, I'm still twenty nine." He shook his head.

"You just don't want to hit the thirty mark." She laughed in response.

"So sue me. Actually, that gives me an idea. When I die for good all of my stuff like my tombstone has to have written on it 2154-2183 and 2185- whenever I die. Hopefully many years from now. But just think, in a few hundred years when no one remembers me any more people will see my tombstone and wonder why the hell there was a two year gap." Garrus laughed.

"That's going to be your legacy? Not defeating the Reapers or anything but a strange curiosity in a graveyard." She nodded.

"Yeah. That's much cooler." They laughed as they finished their dinner.

"So, you don't really talk about the two years I was dead, which I get, I really do, but I can't help but be curious about what I missed." He nodded in understanding. He hadn't really been paying attention to things outside of Omega those two years and he too felt like he had some catching up to do.

"Well, what do you want to know?" She thought for a few moments trying to figure out what she would have paid attention to in those two years. She had already caught up with any technological advancements and any major news stories had boiled down to the Geth threat being dealt with and whether or not she was crazy.

"Any good vids been released?" She finally asked. In truth, not much had happened in those two years that she _needed_ to be caught up on except what had happened to those she cared about. She'd received a message from her mom but she couldn't risk replying while Cerberus was watching her every action. She suspected that the message was sent on behalf of the rest of her family and she couldn't send messages to them either. Wrex was busy on Tuchanka, Tali was busy with the Migrant Fleet, Liara was apparently working for the _Shadow Broker_ of all people and Garrus... she knew what had happened to him. He hadn't told her everything but she could piece it together, especially now she could read his sub-harmonics. Or, at least, most of them. She didn't know how to help him deal with his hurt but she did know one thing; a bullet in Sidonis wasn't going to help.

Garrus must have realised what was weighing on her but he didn't have to words to make it better so he instead answered her question.

"Not really. You've already seen Fleet and Flotilla and that pretty much picked up every award last year. There was a new Blasto movie but, let's face it, that franchise died about three films back. There's a pretty good sit-com about a group of friends of all different species living on the Citadel."

"Yeah, I found a couple of episodes while I was flicking through the Extranet services. Although I found the forum fights to be more interesting."

"Forum fights?" She grinned a little.

"How often do you watch the show?" He shrugged.

"It's on the on-demand service pretty much constantly so I've probably seen every episode."

"You know how in the beginning of season 2 Lucy moved in with Jictus, the turian guy?" Garrus nodded, unsure of where she was going.

"Yeah. So what?" She rolled her eyes.

"So? That's a classic sit-com move, to have a male and female character share an apartment. Usually they end up hooking up but the audience has split in two. Half of them expect them to get together and the other half don't believe it'll happen on such a widely watched show. It's fascinating to watch people's reactions to it." She admitted as she began to drink her drink again. She almost choked halfway through it when she realised that she'd just spent the last five minutes talking about human-turian relationships with _Garrus_, even if it was just about a vid series.

"So, what camp do you fall in?" He asked, trying to remain nonchalant.

"I think they should get together. Screw the naysayers." She said as normally as she could, keeping her focus on her drink. "You?"

"Same. I mean, if asari-turian relationships and quarian-turian relationships can be shown in mainstream media then why not human-turian." He was clamping down hard on his sub-harmonics and was grateful when she changed subjects.

"So, is that really all that came out?" She asked, finally lifting her gaze.

"Pretty much. To be honest, most of the vids that came out for about a year after your death were about you."

"Me?" Her sub-harmonics chimed with disbelief.

"Yeah. There were quite a few documentaries about our fight with Saren and the Geth. There was one 'based on a true story' film about it but the old crew all agreed not to talk to any of the producers of any of them since we couldn't decide which you would want us to and which you wouldn't so it was pretty inaccurate." She raised an eyebrow.

"Aww, you all told them to fuck off? That's so sweet. Thank you." She hadn't figured that people would be interested enough in her to want vids but she was glad that they were inaccurate. She'd rather not have her life replayed for audiences.

"Well, all except one. Joker was contacted by the producers of a show that he knew you liked who wanted you to appear in a couple of episodes. He wasn't sure so he passed it on to me and, well, when I saw the episode pitch and what they were going to do with the character I answered their questions. I wouldn't have been able to do it face to face but I messaged back and forth with them quite a few times." She narrowed her eyes a little but she trusted him. She figured he wouldn't have done it if he wasn't one hundred percent sure that it was what she wanted.

"So, what show was it?" He pulled it up on his omni-tool.

"Doctor Who. It was a two part episode called 'Cybermen on the Citadel'." She laughed at that.

"Really? I got to be in an episode of Doctor Who? Did they do a good job?" She was practically jumping up and down in her seat and he smiled with relief.

"Yeah. In fact, I couldn't watch more than the first few minutes because it..." He trailed off but his sub-harmonics told her what he had been about to say as they trilled with the memory of his pain.

"Well, I'm here now so let's stick it on. I can't wait to see. I haven't seen this show in a while, I think the last episode I watched was a really old one from just after the First Contact War where they pulled the whole 'alternate timeline' thing to explain replacing a lot of the alien 'friendlies' with real species. Didn't I hear before I died that he had an alien companion this series?" Garrus nodded as he set it up.

"Yeah, she's a drell." He said as he sat back with her, watching the opening credits. She was smiling and seemed happier now but he knew that those two years were weighing on the both of them and neither of them were quite sure how to deal with it. But this was a good start...

**AN: In my head Doctor Who is around for as long as there are people to watch it. ;) I just wanted to thank everyone who has been reading so far, especially those of you kind enough to post reviews and fav and follow. You guys rock! Thanks again and hope you enjoyed!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Shepard practically skipped down to engineering, her sub-harmonics trilling with excitement.

"Tali!" She exclaimed, jumping up behind her friend.

"Keelah, Shepard! You're going to give me a heart attack." Shepard smiled, sheepishly.

"Sorry. I'm just excited to have you around again. I've missed you." She admitted. While Garrus had been her best friend on the SR1, Tali had been her first real female friend and she missed having someone to talk to about girl stuff.

"I've missed you too, Shepard." Tali leant against the terminal as Shepard leant against the wall.

"So, are you settling in okay?" She knew that Tali would be having a tough time with Cerberus and she wasn't happy about EDI but she had hoped that in the past week since she had been brought on board, she would have adjusted.

"Yeah. I've been keeping to myself down here but Gabby and Ken aren't bad for Cerberus."

"Thanks Tali, we like you too." Gabby chimed in as she returned to her post but Shepard beaconed her over, deciding that she hadn't really spent much time getting to know the young engineer. She hadn't really gotten to know anyone apart from her core team, being too shy to really try to strike up conversation with any of them, but she figured having Tali there would help her to not be so awkward.

"Yeah, Tali, I definitely don't mind having you around." Ken said a little suggestively, causing Tali to use body language that Shepard knew meant she was a little angry and embarrassed.

"Shove it, Scotty." She joked as she playfully narrowed her eyes at him. He looked a little put-out.

"How did you know my nickname was Scotty?" He asked a little suspiciously and she laughed.

"Because you're Scottish and an engineer and I'm a Trek fan." He shrugged as if to say 'fair enough' before returning to his work. "Anyway," She said, lowering her voice so that only Tali and Gabby could hear her. "Tali's got a boyfriend." A spluttering noise came over Tali's suit speakers.

"I do NOT!" Shepard snorted a little at that.

"Oh really? You and Reegar looked a little friendly down on Haestrom." Tali gave the quarian equivalent of a blush. "See?" Shepard smiled, smugly.

"Was Reegar the dashing young quarian with the rocket launcher?" Kasumi asked as she appeared out of thin air, shocking everyone but Shepard who had gotten used to her appearing out of nowhere.

"Yes, he was." Shepard smiled, knowing that as much as Tali was protesting she really did want to talk about it. "So, Tali, give us the details..."

"I... he... It would have been unprofessional to start anything while we were working together."

"But you're not working together now." Kasumi pointed out and Tali blushed.

"I wasn't going to say anything to him but before he left he told me that he liked me and that he wanted to stay in touch and we've been messaging each other ever since." She admitted sheepishly causing Shepard to grin. She was truly happy for her friend.

"At least one of you spoke up. It would have been so sad if neither of you told each other how you felt." Gabby pointed out.

"If two people care about each other, one of them will say it sooner or later." Shepard reasoned, causing Tali to look at her incredulously.

"What about you and Garrus?" Shepard frowned.

"What about me and Garrus?" She wasn't sure what Tali meant, sure that her friend couldn't know about her feelings for him.

"Oh please, Shepard. I've seen the way you two look at each other. In fact, I was surprised you weren't together on the SR1." Shepard's sub-harmonics started to trill a little with panic.

"I don't know what you're talking about. We're just friends." She spluttered a little, knowing that the others weren't buying it.

"You two would make a cute couple, Shep." Kasumi chimed in as Jack entered the room.

"Who would make a cute couple?" She asked and Shepard groaned. The last thing she needed was everyone talking about her feelings for Garrus.

"Shepard and Garrus." Gabby supplied.

"What? I thought you two were already fucking." She said to Shepard.

"What? No! We. Are. Just. Friends." She emphasised each word and every single one of them raised an eyebrow in response causing her to hide her head in her hand.

"Shepard, have you never asked someone out before?" Kasumi asked, causing her to blush.

"Well... I... No." She admitted, glaring a little when everyone but Tali and Jack gave her pitying looks.

"But, you've had boyfriends before, right?" Gabby asked causing her to shake her head in response.

"Not real boyfriends, no." She admitted, not exactly happy with where the conversation was going.

"Yeah, just fuck 'em and leave 'em. Boyfriends are for suckers." Jack chimed in and everyone but Shepard gave her a look.

"But what about love?" Tali asked, causing Jack to snort. Shepard shook her head, eager to change the subject.

"Look, guys, it doesn't matter. Let's just talk about something else." But Kasumi narrowed her eyes at that.

"Okay, Shep. So, when was your first kiss and who was it with?" She rolled her eyes in response.

"How is this changing the subject?" She countered but Kasumi wouldn't let up.

"Answer the question." Shepard sighed.

"I was sixteen. He was an outsider like me and he recorded a backing track for me in exchange for help with his Spanish work. The last day before I left I asked him if he would help me test a hypothesis, he agreed and I kissed him." She shrugged, it wasn't the best story in the world. Gabby frowned a little.

"Wait, what hypothesis?" Shepard looked a little sheepish at that, pushing her glasses up her nose.

"My mother told me that I should just get over myself and snog someone. She said that 'the world will not end'. She was right."

"So then what happened?" Tali asked and she shrugged.

"Nothing. I think I started babbling about the bio-chemical reactions or something and then he kissed me again. I think I smiled awkwardly after that and then I said I had to go." She shrugged again, trying not to look awkward. She had never told that story to anyone else before.

"Did you ever see him again?" Gabby asked and she shook her head, laughing a little at the absurdity of her own story.

"Nope." She didn't really care, either. There was a good chance that he wasn't even alive. He'd just been someone who'd shown her a little kindness, nothing more. "So, are we done with the interrogation?" She asked tiredly.

"Oh, come on Shep. You must have had some romantic encounters since then." Kasumi prodded but she just shrugged.

"Just two and neither of them meant anything to me. They were just guys." She shrugged again, really wishing that they would stop talking about it. They were quiet for a few moments and Shepard wondered if she'd completely ruined their girl talk.

"You know he feels the same way about you, right? Garrus, I mean." Tali said and Shepard shook her head in disbelief.

"Guys, I appreciate this I really do but it's just... I'm sure it's nothing. No point in me mentioning it to him." She lied, hoping that they at least believed that that was what she believed.

"She's right, you know, Shep. He does care about you." She shook her head again and Jack gave her a look that said 'you're-being-stupid'.

"Hell, Shepard, even _I_ can see it."

"Look, guys, I'm not going to act based on circumstantial evidence. I can't risk messing with the crew dynamics." She reasoned. She was clinging to that reasoning pretty hard and even she could see that she was just being a coward. But today wasn't going to be the day she faced her fears. "Okay, guys, if we're going to continue this chat I vote we do it in Kasumi's room because I need a drink. Who's in?" That got their attention away from her love life as they headed upstairs. The elevator wasn't big enough for all of them so Shepard stayed downstairs and waited for the next one. As she waited EDI appeared next to her.

"Shepard, I just wanted to say; I understand your reasoning. You do not have enough data to accurately predict how Officer Vakarian will react to your advances, so the end result is an unknown." Shepard nodded at that. At least the AI agreed with her, although she figured that probably wasn't a good thing when it came to love...

"Yeah, but I should probably try anyway. Thanks, though, EDI." She said as the elevator returned.

"You're welcome, Shepard."


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

Garrus was almost finished his work for the day when the doors to the battery opened and he was bombarded by the smell of alcohol. He turned around to see Shepard putting a lot of concentration into putting one foot in front of the other.

"Jane, are you _drunk_?" He asked in disbelief. He'd seen her drink before, in fact if she wasn't drinking the neon sugary stuff, she was drinking beer. He'd even seen her drink wine once or twice but he'd never seen her _drunk_.

"So it would seem. I am unaccustomed to drinking brandy and the good doctor insisted that I partake in a small glass. Her definition of 'small' does not entirely match up with my own. The end result being that I am indeed very drunk." He smiled at her, shaking his head as he put his hands on her shoulders and steered her to his cot where she sat down.

"Well, sit down before you hurt yourself. And why are you talking like that?" His sub-harmonics were trilling with amusement and hers trilled back, although they were confused and jumbled.

"When most people are drunk their vocabularies shrink. Mine does the opposite. I begin to talk as if I should be wearing a top hat and a monocle. Although, you already have the monocle thing covered so I shall settle for a top hat. My enemies will fear my stylishness!" She exclaimed before hiccuping and then dissolving into giggles. Garrus rolled his eyes despite the fact that she couldn't see straight enough to notice.

"So, you and the doctor are getting on?" She nodded at that.

"Yes. I am getting on with everyone Garrus. It's so nice, it's like... it's like having a family again." She admitted.

"It could be to do with the fact that you've somehow managed to fill the ship with the only people in the galaxy crazier than yourself." He pointed out and she giggled again.

"A ship full of crazies... my kind of ship!" He smiled. "All I had before was an awkward young turian who'd grown into an idealistic, reckless young cop." She lowered her gaze, almost muttering but he picked up the next few words. "Then I died and he grew up again... the idealism kicked out of him by that hell... my fault..." He shook his head in disbelief. She wasn't to blame, Sidonis was. And he was going to get a bullet in the head for his troubles...

"Jane, what happened to me wasn't your fault." He said but she just shook her head.

"I know Garrus. I'm just mopey because the doctor gave me brandy, that's all." She said, still not looking him in the eye.

"So this is all the doc's fault? It would have nothing to do with our recent visit to Alchera?" Her eyes darkened and she seemed to sober up at that.

"I have been... avoiding my death. I accepted it on a logical level but I didn't really associate those files with _me_. 'Meat and tubes' Jacob said. I don't care how they rebuilt my body but... I was brain dead for months. It's hard for me to accept that I'm all here. Hell, I don't even think I'd be able to recognise if I wasn't. I wasn't exactly the most normal of people before they brought me back. It's dumb and it doesn't really bother me on a logical level but when I think about what happened above Alchera something inside me freezes with fear." Garrus sat down next to her, putting his arm around her. Her sub-harmonics responded in thanks.

"Jane, you _died_. I think I'd be more concerned if it didn't bother you. But that isn't all is it?" She smiled, shaking her head. He knew her too well.

"I collected all of the dog tags but... I couldn't put names to faces Garrus. Not for most of them. I commanded the SR1 for months and I didn't even know half of my crew. What kind of shitty CO does that make me?" He shook his head.

"Just because you're not good with people doesn't mean you're a bad leader." She laughed a little.

"Isn't that exactly what it means?"

"No. Everyone on that ship agreed to follow you because you know what you're doing. You don't have to be everyone's best friend for that to be true. Plus, you said it yourself, you're getting along much better with this crew anyway. The ground team, at least." She nodded.

"Yep. I make a good CO on the ship full of crazies." He nodded.

"I suppose that must make me the craziest to be your best friend." She laughed at that, pushing him a little. "So, how long until you sober up? I can't have you keeping me from my work all night." He joked.

"Pft! _Work_. I'm your commander and I am ordering you to put up with my drunken shenanigans!" He sighed at that, chuckling a little.

"How can you even pronounce shenanigans when you're this drunk?" She shook her head.

"I am not that drunk. I am just gravity challenged." He snorted and she smiled, fiddling with her ponytail. "No, I think I'm sobering up now. I honestly didn't have that much to drink."

"Good. I'd hate to think that The Great Commander Shepard was a light weight." She shook her head.

"Next time we're on the Citadel or Illium or... not Omega, that's just asking for trouble, but next time we're in a civilized part of the galaxy where there's a bar then drinking contest, you and me." He shook his head.

"It's not really fair if we're drinking different drinks." She frowned.

"Why would we be drinking different drinks? It's not food and neither of us is allergic to each other." She said before blushing furiously. "I mean, each other's food! God, I _am_ drunk..." She shook her head.

"Nah, if you were drunk you wouldn't have caught your mistake. I'd say you're sobering up." She nodded.

"Yeah, but I think I'll go and get some meds to clear my head. Before I go, though, I noticed before... you don't really seem to like our newest recruit." Garrus had to stop himself from growling.

"Who? Samara? I like her just fine." He said but she gave him a look and he sighed. "Fine, I don't like the idea of an assassin watching your back, okay?" She snorted at that.

"Says the vigilante." She smirked and he gave her look before she continued. "He hasn't got my back, you have. Everyone else is just here to make us look good by comparison." She joked but she could still see his distrust. "What do you have against assassins anyway?"

"He's loyal to nothing but his next paycheck." She sighed.

"You sound like Jacob. We _are_ the next paycheck."

"Except he's not taking the money. Why?" She shrugged.

"Why is anyone here? I can't start questioning motives now, I'd never stop." She sighed again and frowned as his sub-harmonics chimed in. She'd never heard those particular pitches from Garrus but she'd seen enough vids now to know what it was. "Are you jealous of him?" She asked and he looked away. "Oh, Garrus..." She said, wrapping her arms around him. "_You_ are the deadliest sniper on this ship, baka. No matter what anyone else says." He smiled at that, nodding.

"Thanks, ani. I'm being dumb." She shook her head when he called her 'ani'. She still hadn't figured out what it meant but then, she hadn't told him what baka meant either.

"Yes, you are. Now, I'm going to see Mordin and see if we can't adjust my cybernetics to increase my alcohol tolerance. Night."

"Night."

* * *

"Increasing alcohol tolerance should not be a problem. Been meaning to speak to you, in fact. Figured out several modifications that would be beneficial." She frowned as he began to work on her cybernetics.

"Like what?" She asked as his omni-tool hovered over her face.

"Higher density skin weave. Should prevent damage in battle and... chafing." She frowned again.

"Okay, I get the first application but... on second thought, maybe I don't want to know why you went there. Alright, what else?" She tried not to flinch as he injected something into the side of her neck.

"Increased body's ability to process dextro substances." She frowned again.

"Why? I'm not dextro allergic."

"No but body still incapable of processing dextro substances. This adjustment will allow cybernetics to create energy from dextro food. Also will enable body to process other substances." Her frown deepened.

"You mean other than food? Like what?" She wondered if Mordin was deliberately beating around the bush or if she was still drunk.

"Bodily fluids." She raised an eyebrow.

"What do you mea- EW! Gross! _Mordin_!" He shrugged at her reaction.

"Sexual interaction is a perfectly normal stress release for hormone driven-" She cut him off.

"Mordin, I am not screwing Garrus!" He smiled at that.

"I didn't mention Officer Vakarian." She blushed and stammered a little.

"Right, you were changing my tolerance levels just in case I came across a random turian or quarian and decided I wanted to bang them..." She muttered and he shook his head, still smiling.

"Enjoy yourself while you can Shepard." Her mind went back to memories from last week, after the girls had all gone to continue their talk in Kasumi's room.

_"I miss Kal." Tali sighed, curled up on the sofa next to Kasumi and Gabby. Shepard and Jack were sitting at the bar, both leaning over it sleepily. They'd been drinking for the last few hours and Shepard realised that they'd hit the mopey part of the evening._

_"I miss Keiji." Kasumi said in response._

_"Hell, I've got no one to miss." Jack said and Gabby murmured in agreement._

_"Why don't you and Ken go out?" Shepard asked and Gabby just looked at her. "I mean, you both clearly care about each other." She shook her head._

_"He's an idiot. And I could ask you the same about Garrus." Shepard groaned in response._

_"I thought we were done with this." She muttered but Kasumi just shrugged._

_"Face it, Shep. There's not much chance for the rest of us girls on this ship, except Gabby but we're not talking about her right now, so we're living vicariously through you." Shepard frowned._

_"Guys, there's a million reasons why it wouldn't work out. I mean, he's a turian and I'm a human to start with..." She took another drink, despite the fact that she knew it was a bad idea._

_"So what? Turians are good fucks." Jack said, shrugging. Everyone else just looked at her._

_"How would that even work?" Gabby asked, frowning as if trying to concentrate on something. Jack shrugged again._

_"They're not that different down there." Shepard shook her head, trying not to think about it, especially not in relation to Garrus because she knew that if she kept along that train of thought in her current state she'd be quickly heading down to the Main Battery to confirm what Jack was saying for herself. She didn't let any of the others in on that fact though because she knew that they would probably take her down there themselves._

_"Okay, I'm going to call it a night before I fall asleep in here." Jack snorted._

_"Yeah, right. You're either going to fuck Vakarian or yourself in the shower. Who want to take bets?" Shepard narrowed her eyes at Jack as everyone else rolled their eyes. Damn woman was psychic._

She was pulled back to the present by the sound of Mordin's voice.

"Changes should occur over the next two days. In that time period certain aspects of your implants have been disabled." She frowned, she felt no different.

"Like what?"

"Medication administered by implants will no longer work. Medication redundant with new adjustments." She laughed a little, her sub-harmonics trilling with disbelief.

"You mean no more pain? No more vomiting?" Mordin nodded and she almost hugged him.

"Unfortunately will not take effect for two days." She shook her head at that, eyes a little wide with panic.

"Mordin, I need either that medication or the implants online." He frowned.

"Why? Just stated you were not engaged in sexual activity." She could have hit him.

"That's not why I take it! I take it for pain." He merely shrugged.

"Sorry Shepard. Cannot reverse process. Here, painkillers, anti-nausea medication and sedative. Suggest you use painkillers and sedative now to ensure sleep." She sighed.

"Yeah, yeah, I know how this goes. Night Mordin."

* * *

The next morning Garrus frowned at his visor as it told him that it was 0600. Jane was down there every morning no later than 0540. He sighed, deciding to check on her and make sure she wasn't hung over. On his way out of the Main Battery he saw Rupert who waved him over.

"Don't suppose you're on your way to see the commander?" He asked, causing Garrus to frown a little.

"Yeah. She's usually up by now." Rupert handed him a tray.

"She said she's not feeling so great and asked me to make her up a tray of food. Since you're headed up there already, do you mind taking it?" Garrus shook his head and headed up towards the elevator, wondering what could be wrong with her. He'd never seen her sick before.

The walked into her room cautiously, trying to figure out where she was.

"Jane?" He heard her groan.

"Garrus? Fucking Rupert, I told him to send Chambers or someone." She muttered angrily from the bathroom. The door was open and he saw her sitting next to the toilet.

"Jane, are you okay?" She nodded.

"Yeah. Upset stomach." She explained, clutching her middle as she got up and headed back into the main room where a vid was still playing.

"Then why did you ask for a tray of food?" He asked as she reached for the mug of hot white liquid on the tray, rolling her eyes.

"Why didn't I ask for Kasumi or Tali specifically?" She groaned to herself.

"If you want me to go I can- wait, Jane, why can I smell blood?" Her face turned bright red and she buried it in her hands.

"_Please_ don't make me explain the human reproductive system..." She murmured into her hands. As soon as she said it his visor automatically downloaded the information on what was wrong with her and he figured if turains could blush, he would be as red as her.

"Ah... erm... sorry. I can go if you want but if you want some company..." She nodded.

"If you want you can go but it would be nice if you... If you want you can send up Tali or Kasumi or someone." She muttered, downing her drink. He shook his head.

"I'll stay Jane." She smiled at that, clutching her knees to her chest. "What is all this, anyway?" He asked, pointing to the variety of food in front of her. She shrugged.

"Dunno. I just asked for whatever had the highest fat content. Although this drink is my favourite. It's hot milk with a shot of vanilla syrup and white chocolate shavings melted into it." He sat next to her and she leant into him, smiling a little. "You're warm." She pointed out and he smiled back.

"I'm always warm compared to you. You run cold even by human standards." She laughed a little in agreement. "So, what are you watching?"

"Star Trek." She said, her jaw clenching a little with pain before she downed another two painkillers.

"Obviously, I meant which series."

"Voyager." They watched in silence for a few moments before she spoke again. "I always liked Seven." He laughed a little at that.

"Really?" He asked sarcastically and she hit him playfully. "Next you'll be telling me you like Spock or Data." She laughed at that.

"Thanks, Garrus. For caring enough to stick around." She said, leaning in closer to him.

"No problem, ani. No problem."


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

**AN: Warning! Smut levels are high in this chapter! Also, sorry if the writing is a little off, I haven't really written mature content before.**

Shepard had given him a few hours to cool off. He had every right to be angry, she had stopped him from getting vengeance but she couldn't let him do it. This wasn't her Garrus. The idealistic cop who wanted to save the world had grown up. That was to be expected. But this anger... he needed to deal with it before it consumed him and she knew that a bullet in Sidonis wasn't the answer. She walked into the main battery like it was any other day but found it empty.

"EDI, where's Garrus?" She asked. If she and Garrus had one thing in common it was that their schedules never changed. To arrive in the Main Battery and find him missing was a little unnerving.

"Officer Vakarian is in the gym." She almost hit herself for not having gone straight there. They'd both complained about the lack of gym on the SR1 and now that they had one whenever either of them were feeling stressed it was the first place they went.

She headed down to the gym to find Garrus beating the shit out of a punching bag.

"That helping?" She asked softly. He stopped, shaking his head.

"Not really." She sighed, thinking, before moving closer to him.

"It might help if it could hit back. Come on, let's spar." He turned to look at her before shaking his head and laughing hollowly.

"Not happening. I'd end up hurting you." She raised an eyebrow at that.

"Okay, well now I'm a little insulted." She folded her arms and he sighed.

"Jane..." He said but she simply walked up to him and stood ready.

"Garrus, you're not going to hurt me. I promise." He shrugged at that and stood ready before striking. She dodged him easily. After a few more attempts she rolled her eyes.

"You're not even trying. When will you get it through your thick skull? I. Will. Not. Break." On each word she landed a blow and after the final one he growled at her and struck like he meant it. She easily blocked all but the last on which hit her in the gut. Her skin weave took most of the damage and her implants made sure that any pain only lasted seconds as she healed as fast as a krogan.

"See?" She said, preparing to strike again. "I was wondering what was taking you so long given how mad at me you are." He stopped still with shock at that statement and she used it to her advantage, almost pinning him.

"Jane, I'm not mad at you." She raised an eyebrow at that.

"Really? I got in the way of your shot." She reasoned and he laughed a little. She couldn't help but smile at the sound; it was less hollow than before.

"I'm glad you stopped me. I'm mad at myself for not listening to you before. It took you literally in my way for me to stop and think about what I was doing." His eyes darkened and she hit him out of frustration.

"You were angry! Justifiably so! Hell, when I looked at Sidonis I remembered the pain in your eyes and it took everything I had not to shoot him myself. But you can't act out of revenge. It'll haunt you like nothing else..." Now it was her turn for her gaze to darken but she covered it quickly enough for him not to notice. "I care about you too much to let you do that to yourself." He struck out again, his strikes more calculated now.

"Why? Why do you care so much?" He asked, his sub-harmonics ringing with confusion and a little self hatred. She struck out at that, pinning him down.

"You say that as if I have a choice." She muttered, her face inches from his as her weight kept him pinned to the floor. He found his anger dissipating only to be replaced by something far less simple to deal with. He became painfully aware of how close her body was to his, fire burning in the places where plates touched flesh. Did she notice his breathing go ragged? His heartbeat increase? She was sure gonna notice in a second, he thought as he felt his groin plates shift.

"Dammit Garrus don't. Don't do this to yourself." She mumbled, trying to stay coherent but she knew it was a losing battle as she felt his hot breath on her cheek. She felt a burning desire grow within her and she knew if she didn't move soon she'd be testing whether or not turians could kiss.

But she couldn't move. Next thing she knew, he had used her complacency against her, flipping her over. She lay for a few moments as he pinned her, his gaze no longer filled with self-hate but predatory lust. Was she seeing things? Did he want her just as much as she wanted him?

The adrenaline coursing through her blood made her brave as she leant her head forward and pressed her lips to his mouth plates. She felt him growl as her tongue flicked across the opening of the plates. He opened them slightly, allowing her tongue access. She touched her tongue to his and his growl deepened as he let go of her arms, allowing her to wrap them around his neck and pull them both up so that she was straddling his waist, his erection pressing against her through the thin material of their workout clothes.

She rocked her hips against him and he growled in response, tugging at her vest. She quickly pulled it off as he discarded of his own top before she resumed kissing him, this time along the rough flesh of his neck. Her hand brushed against his waist and he moaned, making her smile.

"I take it that's a good place to touch you?" She said, her voice low.

"Yeah, very good." He managed as she returned her hand there, stroking up and down. He wasn't sure how much longer he could keep up rational thought when a synthetic voice rang out across the room.

"Commander, we are twenty minutes from Tuchanka." EDI stated causing them both to groan in unison.

"Thank you EDI." Jane managed, getting up and Garrus almost bolted out of the door. "Garrus?" She asked, stopping him. He sighed, refusing to turn around.

"I'm sorry Jane, I..." He trailed off, unsure of what to say.

"Garrus, I should be the one apologising. _I_ kissed _you_. Except, I'm not sorry." She put her hand on his arm. He put his hand on hers and she decided to keep going. "Okay, I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable or if this messes up our friendship but I'm not sorry that I finally found the courage to say something, or, rather, do something, about my feelings for you. I get it if you don't feel the same way but-" He cut her off with a chuckle before turning back to face her.

"I think it's rather obvious that I feel the same way." He said, causing her to laugh a little, as he touched his forehead to hers. She'd remembered the gesture from a lot of his vids and figured that it was the turian equivalent of a kiss. She sighed a little.

"I _really_ wish that we could finish what we started or at least, you know, talk about it but if we don't get down to Tuchanka the second we arrive, Grunt might bust a hole through the hull." She said, not quite bringing herself to pull away.

"I told you not to let him out." Garrus joked causing her to hit him playfully.

"Baka." She muttered, finally pulling herself away from him. "Okay, the plan is we do whatever we have to to get our little krogan settled down and then we use whatever lame excuses we can think of to get back to the ship ASAP. Got it?" Garrus chuckled a little.

"Got it." He said before sighing. "What are the chances this takes less than an hour?" She laughed a little at that.

"Not good. But at least there'll probably be something to kill. I'm going to need the distraction..." She smiled wryly and he sighed with frustration.

"Yeah, I think It's going to take nothing less than killing a thresher maw on foot to distract me, ani."

* * *

"You know Garrus, there's an old human saying that comes to mind right about now." Shepard said as they headed back into the Urdnot camp. "Be careful what you wish for." He snorted before becoming mindful that he was, once again, walking very close behind her. Every few minutes he found himself gravitating towards her and having to pull back. It was a little unnerving.

"In my defence, I was under the impression that the world was not a wish granting factory." She smiled at that, practically skipping up to Wrex.

"I don't know, the universe seems to be in a wish granting mood today." And he couldn't help but agree with her.

"Shepard." Wrex said as they approached, both still smiling like fools.

"Took care of your thresher maw." She said, making him laugh.

"I expected nothing less from you two. Did the boy even get a shot in?" Shepard rolled her eyes at that.

"We only took care of the ones he couldn't get himself." She reasoned, shrugging.

"Fair enough. There is, in fact, going to be a celebration of Grunt becoming part of Clan Urdnot. Don't suppose I could convince you two to stick around?" Shepard groaned a little.

"Wrex, you know me, I don't do parties. Plus Cerberus help comes with a shit-ton of paperwork." She was quite pleased with herself for managing to keep a straight face.

"Alright then. What about you, Garrus?"

"No thanks. The Normandy's guns aren't going to calibrate themselves." Shepard tried her very best not to laugh at that but Wrex just gave them both a look.

"I was wondering how long it would take you two to realise." They both looked disbelieving and a little sheepish.

"Huh?" Shepard said, caught off guard, causing Wrex to laugh.

"I told you the last time I saw you Shepard. You two are Blood Tied." She frowned, remembering. The Shaman had called them that as well but she hadn't paid any notice.

"I thought that was just a weird battle thing." She said.

"We're krogan, Shepard. All our stories are weird battle things. This particular weird battle thing is said to occur between mated pairs." He said, smiling at her as she blushed a deep shade of red.

"I still don't put any stock in stories." She said but with a little less conviction than she had on the Citadel.

"Neither do I." Wrex said, still smiling.

* * *

Shepard always hated the shuttle rides back to the Normandy. Being stuck in a confined space with someone you're attracted to while your body is flooded with adrenaline and dopamine from surviving a battle is not a good plan. But now it was different, they were alone and the adrenaline of battle was accompanied by the adrenaline of nerves.

"I've set the autopilot to keep us in orbit and I told Joker we were going to be performing in-flight systems tests before we left. I've also disabled all of the listening devices on board so we can be sure Miranda isn't listening in." She said as she left the cockpit. Garrus frowned at the last thing she said, keen to focus on anything but the elephant in the shuttle.

"I thought you two were getting on since you helped to find her sister." He said as she sat down nest to him.

"We are but she's still loyal to the Illusive Man and there are some things I'd rather he not know." She sighed and looked him in the eye, her heart thumping in her chest. "So, we should talk about this but... I don't know what to say."

"Me neither." He said and she laughed a little before sighing.

"Do you want to give this a shot? Us, I mean. I don't want you to feel like you have to or anything... I don't want to make you uncomfortable..." He laughed at that, shaking his head.

"Jane, you don't ever have to worry about making me uncomfortable. Nervous, yes... but never uncomfortable." He reached out and put his hand on hers and she lowered her forehead to his.

"You really feel the same way about me, huh?" She asked quietly and he chuckled softly.

"I feel like I should be asking that question. Do you have any idea how difficult it was to keep quiet about my feelings for you all these months, ani?" She laughed at that.

"I've known how difficult it was since just before Ilos, baka. You still haven't told me what ani means." He sighed a little, figuring now was as good a time as any.

"It's a term of endearment for those closest to you." He admitted.

"How close?"

"Very. It basically means that you're the person I care the most about." She blushed at that.

"Ok, now I feel bad for calling you baka."

"Why?"

"It means idiot." He laughed at that and she began to feel her mouth go dry. "Garrus?"

"Yeah?"

"Help me get out of this damn armour." He nodded, mutely, fumbling for the clasps as she did the same for him until they were just in their under-suits which were quickly removed.

He was careful, almost hesitant, at first, as was she, but it hadn't taken very long for their bodies to react to each other and she was soon wet with an overwhelming need for him as he pulled her body closer to his.

Her skin felt as if it were was on fire as he explored her curves with his rough hands, his touch tortuously slow. She gasped when his hands reached her breasts and he paused his exploration of her body for a moment to watch her writhe beneath him as he tested and teased the soft mounds.

"I take it that's a good place to touch you?" He asked softly, echoing her own words from earlier that day, nuzzling her neck as he did so and causing her in moan in response.

"Yeah, very good." She gasped as one of his hands travelled downward and started to stroke the inside of her thigh.

At that, she decided to return the favour, caressing the soft skin hidden beneath his plates but being sure to keep one hand stroking his waist at all times, causing him to make a noise similar to purring as her hands worked their way slowly downwards. She surprised herself when her implants allowed her to make a similar noise in return as his hand worked it's way up her thigh.

At that point rational thought escaped them and the need for each other overpowered their caution as she lowered herself onto him and began rocking her hips. He felt so good against her, his exploring hands quickly finding her bundle of nerves and causing her to cry out as she came around him, pulling him with her into orgasmic oblivion.

"Jane?" He finally managed, his hand lazily stroking the side of her waist as she lay on her side, facing him.

"Yeah?" She responded.

"I think you've ruined all sex with anyone else for me." He said, his sub-harmonics trilling happily.

"Same. But who needs other people? I'm not going anywhere. Unless, of course, you want me to." She replied, her sub-harmonics as happy as his but with a little fear showing through at the end.

"Are you kidding? I don't want to leave your side ever again." He admitted, the fear from her sub-harmonics dissipating to be replaced by pure joy.

"Good because there's no where I'd rather have you."


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

Shepard looked and felt tired as she walked into the Mess Hall and sat down next to Garrus.

"I'm assuming your chat with the boss didn't go too well." She smiled at that, shaking her head as he passed her a bottle of her pop/energy drink.

"When does it ever? Bastard's too sneaky for his own good." He laughed at that.

"It must've been bad for you to swear about him without resorting to untranslatable languages." She sighed at that, resting her head in her arms on the table.

"Yeah but he is one of the few people that deserves it. I hope he gets lung cancer, I really do." She sighed. It took everything she had not to lean against him as Kasumi headed over to them.

She had decided when she first came aboard the new Normandy to not let Cerberus know her weaknesses. It was the reason she hadn't asked outright about Garrus' location and why she hadn't tried to contact any of her family.

Of course, it was obvious to anyone that Garrus was dear to her but she was certain that the Illusive Man would not be above using him against her if the true extent of her feelings became known to him. Hell, she hadn't even told Garrus that she loved him in so many words given how new the romantic aspect of their relationship was.

That, of course, meant that PDA was out of the question, as were intimate moments anywhere where she hadn't disabled the Cerberus listening devices.

She leant close enough to Garrus to tell him to meet her in her quarters when Kasumi sat down opposite her.

"You know, you two could be a _little_ more subtle about the fact that you're hooking up." She said in Japanese, causing Shepard to roll her eyes.

"We are _not_ hooking up." She replied, also in Japanese to keep their conversation from prying Cerberus ears.

"Shep, in the past week you two have barely been in the same room together for more than five minutes before you disappear off somewhere. Plus Jack just told me that you two were freaking her out on the Collector ship by being even more weirdly in sync than usual." Shepard shrugged in response as Garrus frowned at them, unable to decipher their conversation.

"That doesn't mean anything." Kasumi sighed, rolling her eyes.

"Please don't insult my intelligence, Shepard. You know those looks you used to give each other when you thought the other wasn't looking?"

"Yeah, I'm still not sure you guys didn't just make that up." Kasumi rolled her eyes again in frustration.

"Made up or not, they've been replaced by knowing smiles when your eyes meet. It's all very romantic, if a little sickening. Point is, you'd have to be blind to not figure it out so _stop overthinking it!_" Kasumi emphasised the last bit and Shepard sighed in response.

"I just don't want Cerberus to know more about me than they have to." She admitted and Kasumi gave her a sympathetic look.

"I know. Believe me, if anyone knows wanting to remain unseen it's me but this isn't a secret, Shep. Anyone in the same room as you two can see you're madly in love." She held her hands up at that.

"Fine, fine. I get it." She said, getting ready to leave when Kasumi spoke up again.

"So, have you actually told him?" She asked, still in Japanese.

"Told him what?" Kasumi sighed.

"Told him that you love him. I'm going to assume you've told him that you care about him but have you actually told him how much?" Shepard blushed at that, avoiding the thief's gaze.

"No. I haven't yet..." Kasumi nodded at that, accepting the answer.

"Just... don't wait too long, okay? You never know how much time you have left." Kasumi got the far away look that she often wore when thinking about Keiji and Shepard decided it was time to go, turning to Garrus and speaking in Turian.

"Come on, let's go." He followed behind her and once in the elevator she leant against him, taking comfort from his warmth.

"What was all that about?" He asked her and she sighed.

"Yeah, turns out we haven't been being as subtle as we thought..." She said, shrugging.

"Ah. So, everyone knows?" She sighed again at that as they made their way into her quarters and she sat down next to him on the sofa.

"Well, everyone claims to have known before we did. God, all the girls were giving me so much crap about it."

"I guess that explains the drunken Tali stopping by the Main Battery a week after we picked her up and telling me that I had to man up and just tell you how I felt." Jane frowned at that.

"Did she tell you how I felt about you?" He looked a little embarrassed.

"Yeah but I just thought she was drunk." Jane smiled at that.

"Yeah, I didn't believe her either. Were we being complete idiots?" He shrugged.

"I think so." She laughed at that.

"Yeah, I think so too." She frowned as her arm began to ache and she remembered taking a round during their fight through the Collector ship. She looked it over and was surprised to find that it looked fine. No bruises, not even a little redness.

"What's wrong, ani?" Garrus asked as her frown deepened.

"My arm... It aches a little and I remember feeling it get hit but I felt the medi-gel dispense straight away so I didn't think about it any more. My cybernetics should have healed it by now but it feels like it's bruised which it clearly isn't." He frowned, bringing his left arm up alongside hers.

"You mean like this?" She looked at his forearm and say that the plate looked a little scuffed and she figured that it was the turian equivalent of a bruise. As soon as she saw the damage to his arm it became clear in her mind that, while she could still feel it, the pain wasn't coming from her but from him. She frowned as her mind tried to make sense of it.

"Wait here, I want to try something." She went into the bathroom and grabbed a pair of scissors meant for cutting hair. She steeled herself before running the blade across the flesh of her palm, pressing hard enough to draw blood.

Through in the main room she heard Garrus swear in Turian.

"Jane, why does my hand feel like it's been sliced open?" He asked as she watched the shallow wound close, thankful for cybernetics. She didn't wash the blood from her hand as she walked back into the main room, holding it up to show Garrus.

"Because mine was. Don't worry, my cybernetics closed it up quickly but I don't understand how this is possible..." She frowned and he shrugged, unable to give her an answer. She sighed, cleaning the blood from her hand. "I'll start working on theories with Mordin in the morning but who wants to bet it's to do with being Blood Tied or whatever?"

"That's probably a safe bet." Garrus said, pulling her close to him. She smiled as she tugged him towards the bathroom.

"I need a shower after the Collector ship and I just had an idea on how to test this new ability that I think you'll like..."

* * *

The next morning they put no effort into hiding the fact that they had both come from Shepard's quarters, deciding that any disruptions their relationship might have had on the crew would have already happened given the fact that everybody knew about it from the beginning. Shepard reckoned that it was to be expected, given how small the ship was but she still didn't like the idea of others knowing of her private life.

The mission had gone as they usually did, which is to say that it went nothing like how they had expected it to. Of course, Shepard could tell that the outcome of this particular mission had rattled Garrus more than he was letting on so she decided to ask him about it as soon as they entered her cabin.

"You don't like that I gave Zaeed a second chance, do you?" She asked, removing her armour, and he sighed.

"You know, being able to sense each other's wounds in battle may be beneficial but reading each other's emotions is going to drive us nuts." She sighed, wishing that she could tell him that it had nothing to do with the strange bond between them but she couldn't.

"Yeah, Mordin and I worked out a theory this morning and it's been pretty much backed up by some brain scans he took of me. So you know how every species has low level telepathic abilities?"

"No." She sighed.

"Okay, I'll try to explain this simply. Every species has a latent telepathic ability that they can't access, except for asari. That's what asari tap into when melding with other species but for the species in question the abilities aren't strong enough to use without an outside factor like an asari." He frowned in response, his sub-harmonics voicing confusion.

"So what does that have to do with us? Neither of us are asari." She sighed, unsure of how to explain the next bit.

"Our brain waves sort of... match up? It's difficult to explain without going into the difficult science. It would be impossible within the same species but across species brain waves can... compliment each other. It wouldn't normally result in anything but we met while my body was under extreme levels of stress so combine that with the complimenting brain waves and Mordin reckons it would have been enough to form a sort of... connection.

"Nothing would have come of it if we'd never met again but the second time we met we were quickly thrown into battle together and the flood of adrenaline added to our proximity to each other only intensified what was already there. Are you following so far?" She asked, biting her lip a little. He sighed, nodding.

"Yeah, I think so. So, that's why we're so good in battle together?" She nodded.

"Yep. But then, if just being near each other in battle heightened the connection that much..." She trailed off, collapsing onto the sofa.

"Sleeping together tipped into into almost full blown telepathy." He finished, sitting next to her. She sighed at that.

"It's not _that_ extreme. It's just... it's sort of like I can feel you as an extension of me if that makes sense." He nodded. It did make sense because he could feel her presence in exactly the same way.

"Is it weird that I'm not more weirded out by this?" He asked and she laughed a little.

"I'd say yes but it doesn't really bother me either." She curled up to him, sub-harmonics trilling contentedly.

"So, what do the krogan have to do with it?" She shrugged at that.

"Krogan physiology is more prone to making these kinds of connections, especially with other krogan. It's sort of weird to think that if you'd been human or I'd been turian we wouldn't have this between us, whatever it is."

"Yeah, it is." He agreed and she sighed, bracing herself for her next question.

"So, why are you so upset about Zaeed?"

"I don't trust him. Not any more. I worry that giving him a second chance will come back to bite you." She shrugged.

"Maybe but I couldn't not. It's just who I am." He sighed at that.

"I know, ani, I know. It's in your nature to trust everyone and do anything you can to make everyone else happy I just... I'm afraid that one day you'll give too much. I'm afraid that one day the price will be to high and you'll pay it without hesitation." He lowered his forehead to hers and she wished that she could tell him that he was being silly, that his fears weren't founded in truth but she couldn't. Had she known that she would die getting Joker off of the original Normandy, she still would have done it. She wanted so badly to tell him that she would never put him through that pain again but it wasn't a promise that she could keep.

"I know, ani." He said, sensing her distress. "It's just who you are but can you promise me something?"

"What?"

"When the time comes, make sure it really is your only option. Try to come back to me." She nodded.

"Of course, Garrus. I promise."


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

"Are you coming up Garrus?" Jane asked as they stepped into the elevator after returning from Pragia. "I might need help getting out of my armour." She said, wrapping her arms around his neck so that her armoured fingers brushed against the underside of his fringe, causing his to growl a little as he pulled her body as close to his as their armour would let him.

"Well the main guns _do_ need calibrating." He joked and she hit him playfully in the chest.

"Baka." She muttered, shaking her head.

"But I guess I could put it on hold for a while. Although I am a little concerned that we'll never get anything done ever again..." She smiled before leaning in and kissing him, human style, as the elevator opened up at her quarters.

"I'm okay with that." She said, pulling away.

"Careful Jane, I might just have to prove my point right now." She laughed at that.

"I might just let you." She murmured into his neck as he pulled her close to him.

Then Joker's voice rang out over the intercom.

"Commander, Jack and Miranda are in the middle of a... disagreement. Can you head it off before they tear out a bulkhead?" She groaned, leaning her head against Garrus' shoulder as he growled under his breath.

"I'll deal with it." She said, a little reluctantly.

"Take pictures." He said and she laughed a little under her breath.

"Well, that only took, what? Five minutes?" She asked as Garrus shook his head.

"It's the price of a ship full of crazies." She sighed before heading down to deal with them.

"I hate this part of my job..."

* * *

After what felt like hours Shepard finally made it back to her quarters, collapsing on her bed, still in her armour. She almost jumped when she heard a laugh from the corner of the room, realising she must be tired if she hadn't already sensed him near-by.

"I wasn't sure you'd pick up on the fact that I was done." She said, turning to face him. He sighed, moving towards her.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure you were putting all of your effort into sending me the message." He joked and she shrugged, sitting up.

"Gotta test it." She reasoned and he nodded, sitting next to her.

"Yeah. Spirits, is it stupid that even though we spend all of our downtime together and I'm always on your squad that I still feel as though I hardly ever see you?" She shook her head.

"No. Since the Collector ship everything has sped up. If we're not out helping the crew to tie up loose ends, we're gathering resources to upgrade the ship. And then the few moments we do get to ourselves get interrupted by..." She trailed off, starting to unclasp her uncomfortable armour.

"Yeah. I guess I still don't really believe..." He leant his forehead to hers and she laughed a little.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. But, I've never really _been_ in a relationship before and this is all new territory." She admitted, her sub-harmonics trilling a little with nerves.

"Same." He admitted and she raised an eyebrow.

"Are you telling me that you've never been in a real relationship?" She asked, a little disbelieving.

"Why are you so surprised?" He asked.

"Because you're _you_." She said causing him to laugh.

"I could make the same argument for you." He replied and she blushed a little. "Turians don't really date the same way humans do. It's either really serious or it means nothing, there isn't really an in between." He explained a little nervously.

"So, you're pretty much all or nothing?" She asked and he nodded.

"I guess..." He said, suddenly feeling unsure. He knew where _he_ stood with their relationship but he didn't know about her and he didn't want to scare her off.

"See what I mean?" She said, sighing a little. "Between krogan legends and weird psychic connections we haven't really figured out where we stand or whatever. I just... I know that turian relationships aren't the same as human relationships and I guess I just want to know where we stand." She said nervously, her hand messing with her ponytail. This was entirely new to her but she knew one thing; she didn't want to fuck it up.

"I don't know any better than you do." He admitted, his nerves matching her own. "I guess we're going to have to figure it out as we go along." She nodded in agreement.

"I guess I just don't like facing the unknown." She admitted.

"I don't think anyone does Jane. But I do know one thing." He said, his voice low as he touched his forehead to hers once more.

"What?" She asked, her eyes meeting his, causing her heart to speed up.

At that point EDI interrupted.

"Commander, we are about to dock at Omega and Samara is waiting for you by the airlock." Shepard groaned in response, picking up the few pieces of armour she'd managed to get rid of already.

"Jane, you're exhausted. Can't this wait until morning?" Garrus asked but she shook her head, grabbing a bottle of pop as she went.

"No, it can't. Garrus, we're running out of time. All of the colonists who have been abducted are running out of time... The only reason we don't already have that IFF is because I need everyone at their best and I need to finish upgrading the ship." He sighed.

"That doesn't mean that you should burn yourself out." She snorted at that.

"Oh Garrus, you haven't seen me even begin to try to burn myself out. Trust me, I can handle it." The worry in his sub-harmonics refused to lessen. "I promise that if you think I'm putting myself in danger because I'm too tired, I'll happily head back to the ship, okay?" He sighed again but nodded.

"Okay. Let's see if we can catch Samara's daughter before morning." She nodded in agreement at that as they headed towards Omega.

* * *

Garrus was worried about Shepard. If the mission had been to fight their way through every gang on Omega he wouldn't have given it a second thought but he had felt her panic as the poor dead girl's mother had looked to her for answers and condolence. She'd managed, as she always did, but her exhaustion was weighing on her and he could feel it. So, as they left the apartments he pulled her to one side.

"Jane, I'm calling you on it. Next opportunity, you need to head back to the ship and sleep." She rolled her eyes at that.

"Garrus, I'm fine. There's no danger so there's no problem." He sighed at that.

"Jane, you almost had a panic attack when you were talking to that woman." Her sub-harmonics chimed with anger at that.

"So? That's what _always_ happens Garrus. The fact that I didn't have a panic attack means that I'm fine." She said, a little angrily.

"I'm sorry Jane. It's just... it's hard not to worry about you when I can feel you panic like that." She calmed down, hearing the apology in his sub-harmonics.

"I know Garrus but I'm fine, really. Let's just figure out what to do with Samara."

Samara was waiting for them around the corner.

"I have devised a plan for cornering Morinth." She said as they approached and Shepard nodded, pushing her glasses up her nose.

"Okay, let's hear it."

"We will not be able to trap her conventionally. If she sees us approaching with weapons or in armour she will flee. The only option is to use you as bait, Commander. You have an inner strength that she will be drawn to." Garrus gently touched Shepard's back as he felt her begin to panic and she calmed a little at his touch.

"Samara, I can't... I would never be able to pull it off. In battle when I'm protecting someone, yes, I have a strong personality but in normal, everyday social situations... Samara, I would have a panic attack or, at least, close enough to one to tip her off. I will do it if there is truly no other option but I'm telling you now that there's a good chance it won't work." Garrus felt her shame as she admitted her faults to Samara. She wanted nothing more than to ignore her fear and do the mission anyway but it would do nothing more than put the mission in jeopardy. The ideal situation would be to have Morinth see Shepard when she was utterly unavoidable like when she wielded her sword and shotgun in battle or when she...

"Garrus, what is it?" Shepard asked him, frowning slightly. He shifted his weight sheepishly.

"I just had an idea but you're not going to like it." He admitted and she narrowed her eyes as her mind probed his to find out what he meant.

"You're right, I don't like it." She said, still frowning but he could see her coming to the same conclusion he did.

"I don't like it either, Shepard. I _really_ don't like it. But it would work." She felt his protective streak show through his professional mask as he spoke. He didn't like her being used as bait but he was right, it would work.

"Yeah, you're right." She said, her frown replaced by a look of reluctance as her sub-harmonics voiced her determination to go through with it no matter what.

"Would anyone care to fill me in?" Samara asked as Shepard sighed before explaining the plan.

* * *

Garrus kept to the darkest corners of Afterlife, carefully scanning the area for any sign of the Ardat-Yakshi. He had been a little surprised when Aria had agreed to go along with their plan but somehow she and Shepard seemed to get on. He figured it was their mutual lack of bullshit.

Samara had wanted Shepard to go totally alone but finally agreed to having him in the background so that if anything happened, he could be by her side in seconds. He knew that even unarmed (she had hated the fact that Samara had insisted that she not carry even a knife) she was deadly but he still wanted to be close by. He watched the crowd hush as upon the stage walked a tall, slender human woman with fiery red shoulder length locks in black jeans, black boots and a black tunic made of an almost see-through material over a black bra. He almost didn't recognise her, the hair throwing him off, but as she scanned the room her eyes locked with his momentarily and his heart practically jumped out of his chest.

The entire bar, usually filled with rowdy crowds, was hushed as the sound system began to fill with music and the woman on stage began to sway her hips.

Shepard had always hated dancing in bars and clubs. She'd told Garrus that she felt as if she was being watched and judged by the people she was with and so the result was awkward, half-hearted movements. This, however, was different. 'The faceless mob' as she called it had no power over her and she was no longer shy and awkward when she was on the stage resulting in fluid movements that had every eye focused on her.

And that was all before she opened her mouth.

"_The boys who kiss and bite,_  
_They are the brilliant ones who speak and write with silver luck..._  
_They sing in clever tongues,_  
_Oh how my knees go weak to be the one -_  
_she kicks and bucks._  
_Always quick to follow,_  
_The boys are too refined,_  
_Won't matter tomorrow,_  
_Oh, to be in his mind,_  
_And if the timing is right to sneak off into the night,_  
_I'll let myself be taken just for the thrill._  
_And if I'm given the chance to be a doll in his hands,_  
_I will be sure we shake the mountains while we dance._"

Her voice rang out across the club and he quickly scanned the room, realising that everyone, no matter how inebriated, was focused entirely on her. He had to admit, it was a struggle to keep his own mind on the mission and not on her but the need to keep her safe was still there, keeping him focused on the task at hand.

When she'd finished he saw her head towards the back of the club and saw that she was followed by an asari that he figured was Morinth. He felt Jane's panic but he recognised it now as simply her reaction to meeting new people and figured that Morinth had made contact. He then felt relief and he figured that she had managed to successfully get Morinth to go with her somewhere private.

At that point he left Afterlife and began to follow the familiar tugging feeling in his chest to find Shepard but he broke into a sprint when the feeling of relief turned to nerves before turning to full-blown panic as he felt something else try to force it's way inside her mind, causing her to focus on him and their bond to keep the intruder out.

By the time he arrived Samara was standing over Morinth's body and Shepard was struggling to get up from the floor. Garrus walked over to her and picked her up as she clutched her head.

"Bitch tried to mind rape me." She mumbled as she struggled to stay conscious.

"It is alright, Shepard. By resisting her you have put great stress on your mind and it need to rest." Samara explained but Shepard simply looked at her.

"Are you going to be okay?" She asked, refusing to lose consciousness while Samara was so obviously hurting.

"I have just killed the smartest and bravest of my daughters but I will be alright." Shepard nodded, presumably happy with the answer, before collapsing into Garrus' arms.

* * *

Shepard awoke in the med-bay, her head throbbing. She tried to sit up but almost lost consciousness again and so decided to keep lying down as she turned to see that the room was empty except for Garrus who was sitting next to her, doing something on his omni-tool.

"Hey." She said, trying not to wince at that sound of her voice.

"Hey." He replied and she smiled, glad to have him to wake up to. "I was worried." He said, reaching for her hand.

"I'm okay Garrus." He sighed at that.

"I know. It's just hard, ani." She nodded, understanding. How terrified had she been when she had watched him be gunned down on Omega? And then, how much despair had she felt when the rocket had hit him? She sighed a little, her mind going back to their conversation before they had arrived at Omega the day before and his comment about turians being 'all or nothing'.

"Garrus, did I ever tell you how old I was when I said my first words?" He frowned at that, confused about the relevence.

"No, you didn't." He said, deciding to go along with it.

"I was three." She said, causing him to frown.

"I don't know anything about human ages ani, but for a turian that's old." She nodded.

"For a human too. But I didn't say a word until one day, when I was three years old, I turned to my mom and, I kid you not, I said 'Mummy may I have another sweet please?'." She laughed a little at the memory of her mother telling her the story.

"I take it humans don't usually start talking in full blown sentences?" She shook her head.

"Nope. Apparently I refused to speak until I could speak fluently." He laughed a little too.

"That sounds like you." He said and her smile widened.

"Yeah, I guess it does. So, my point is that it doesn't bother me if you're 'all or nothing' about stuff, including us, because I'm 'all or nothing' about stuff too." Her smile became a little sheepish and he lowered his forehead to hers.

"Jane, I am definitely all in when it comes to us." He said, causing her to grin.

"Me too."


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

Shepard sat frowning as Kasumi messed with her hair. She wanted nothing more than to help her friend to retrieve Keiji's greybox but she wasn't one for parties, they were stressful and close to unbearable unless she was drinking. Which, of course, she wouldn't be. She turned to Garrus who Kasumi had ended up calling up to distract her.

"Remember when missions were just 'go to this planet and shoot these geth'?" She asked causing Garrus to chuckle.

"To be fair, it was never _that_ simple. I mean, between Thorians and those bureaucrats on Noveria things did get pretty crazy." She shrugged at that, causing Kasumi to glare at her.

"Yes, but I never once had to wear a _dress_." She said and Kasumi sighed.

"I can't believe you never wear dresses, Shep." Kasumi chimed in, causing Shepard to sigh.

"Now you sound like my mom. I've always lived aboard ships and if we get attacked I would like to be wearing an outfit that I can fight back in." She reasoned, shrugging before turning back to Garrus. "Come on, Garrus. You're meant to be distracting me..." He sighed at that.

"You know, you don't have to go alone. I could go with you." Kasumi shook her head at that.

"The invite is for Alison Gunn plus one and I'm the plus one." She said and Shepard nodded in agreement, causing Kasumi to groan with frustration as her hair fell out of place.

"Kasumi, I've already told you, my hair is too thick to do anything with it." She said but Kasumi just shook her head.

"Fine, I guess you're wearing it down." She said, sighing, as Shepard turned her attention back towards Garrus as she sensed that he still wasn't happy about being left behind.

"I know you want to be on my six honey, but walking into a party filled with crime lords you've personally managed to piss off isn't one of your best ideas." He shook his head at that, laughing a little.

"Now you start calling me human pet names?" He joked and she lightly hit him in the chest, grinning.

"Baka." She muttered, causing him to laugh more before sobering up and looking her dead in the eye.

"You've pissed them off too, ani. Perhaps even more than I have." He pointed out and she simply reached for his hand and squeezed it reassuringly, knowing there was no way to spin the situation to make it sound any better. Hell, she'd be almost glad if things turned into a straight up fire fight. Almost.

"So, jewellery?" Kasumi asked as Shepard groaned.

"No! Do I really have to? It does nothing but get in my way..." She groaned.

"Not even ear rings?" Kasumi asked causing her to shrug and look a little apologetic.

"I don't even have my ears pierced. And no, that doesn't mean you can pierce them for me like we're in Grease." She warned causing Kasumi to shrug.

"Come on, you must have worn some jewellery at some point." Kasumi said and Jane just shrugged.

"I had my dog tags but... I don't have them any more." She sighed, pushing away the memory of being spaced. Then a bitter sweet smile began to play on her lips as she remembered something else. "I actually had a holo-locket attached to the same chain. My mom got it for me just before I left the Citadel for biotic training and I kept holos of my family on it. It was nice to have a reminder of them when I was away from home and to remember the reason I was there..." Her sub-harmonics trilled with old grief but she still smiled, even if it didn't quite reach her eyes.

"Just one necklace, then." Kasumi said in an effort to distract Jane from her difficult memories and, to her credit, it worked.

* * *

Jane was quite proud of how she'd managed to stay calm when Kasumi had been stopped from entering the party with her, even managing to talk to Donovan Hock in order to get his voice print (although he really hadn't needed much encouragement) but she couldn't deny that the second bullets started flying she was much happier.

She had to admit that Kasumi's flare for the dramatic in battle put her to shame as the thief took a gunship head on while Shepard sliced through her enemies with her sword.

And then when Kasumi had finally recovered the greybox she knew logically that it had to be destroyed but at that moment the familiar tugging feeling she felt when Garrus wasn't close-by seemed to intensify and she realised that if she lost Garrus she would want to keep anything she could of him. Even if it was as dangerous as the greybox...

Between missing having Garrus on her six and having to deal with people at the party she was exhausted when she finally returned to the ship, deciding to quickly check on how well the new parts she picked up for the engineers were working out before heading up to her quarters to meet Garrus.

It was late on the ship and she found engineering empty except for Tali. She was making no noise, working on a console, but her body language was anxious and she seemed distressed.

Jane had never really had a female friend before Tali, guys didn't have that bitchy element that confused her so much, but the quarian girl was nothing but sweet and Jane had found herself less guarded around her for some reason. She figured it had something to do with the mask but had never thought about it too much. It was just nice to have a friend and, even now that she had managed to make friends with Kasumi, Jack, Gabby and even, to some extent, Miranda, Tali was still her closest friend besides Garrus.

So, she forced away any panic at being too awkward or saying the wrong thing and approached her friend.

"Tali? What's wrong?" Tali spun around, a little surprised.

"Oh, Shepard! Sorry, I just... I just got a message from the flotilla. They're... they're charging me with treason, Jane." She said, her voice cracking.

"Why? Is it because of Cerberus?" Tali shook her head angrily.

"I'm not working with Cerberus, I'm working with you! _And_ I got permission to join you. No, it's not that but they wouldn't tell me what it is over an non-secure channel. I won't know until I return." Jane nodded.

"I'll tell Joker to set a course immediately if you can give him the coordinates." She said simply.

"Thank you, Jane. I was just going to get a ride on a transport from the next system we visited. I figured we wouldn't have time..." She shook her head at that.

"Tali, you're my friend. I'm not going to let some pendejos charge you with treason. I mean, have they met you? It's ridiculous I even feel ridiculous saying it... In fact it could only be more ridiculous if someone told me that you had turned into a geth or something..." Tali laughed a little at that and Jane smiled reassuringly. "We'll get this sorted Tali, I promise."

"Thanks Jane."

* * *

"They're charging _Tali_ with treason?" Garrus asked as he lay beside Jane, her fingers tracing random patterns over his chest plates.

"That's what I said. Idiots." She sighed, pulling a face.

"So, did you attack anyone at the party?" She pulled another face.

"Only when I was supposed to. But no more parties. I don't do people." She said.

"No." He agreed. "People are bastards." She snorted at that.

"We're not people people, are we?" She said, smiling.

"No, that's why we get on so well." He said and she nodded.

"Yeah, I think it is. Anyway, speaking of people, guess who sent me a message?" She said, annoyance bleeding through their connection.

"There is only one person who pisses you off that much is Kaidan." He said and she nodded her head.

"Bingo. Remember the days when he was harmless?" He shook his head.

"No, I think you're making that up." She laughed a little at that.

"Oh come on, he wasn't always bad. Just when he was making me uncomfortable by flirting with me." He just gave her a look.

"Jane, that was all of the time." She shrugged at that.

"I know. But it's not his fault. I'm sure most girls would love to flirt with him and I'm sure he didn't even realise what he was doing. It's not his fault I can't flirt..." Garrus continued to give her a look.

"Jane, I can safely say that you _do_ know how to flirt. But... I mean... If you could've do you think you would have flirted back?" He asked, trying not to let his nerves show in his sub-harmonics but she could feel them anyway. He knew that it couldn't change his feelings for her but a part of him had to know if she was just settling for him.

"No." She said, firmly. "I never liked Kaidan, Garrus. I mean, he's an alright guy and, sure, he's attractive but I don't _feel_ anything for him. Never did." She leant her forehead to his and wrapped her arms around his neck. "You, on the other hand, are a completely different story. Even if I was completely socially capable and had been able to have a normal relationship with Kaidan or anyone else, I still would have chosen you."

"I'm sorry Jane, I just... I realise that you could have something closer to home if you wanted. You don't..." She laughed a little at that.

"Garrus, I've lived on ships my whole life. I've never had a real home so I don't know what having one feels like but if someone asked me I'd say that my home is right here. With you."

"Me too, ani. Me too."


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

Shepard wasn't sure what it was about quarians that made them easier to deal with than other species but she strongly suspected that it was to do with the masks covering their faces. Whatever it was she was glad because it made shouting at the admirals a hell of a lot easier, although her anger on behalf of her friend was enough to tip the scales.

"Come on, Garrus. Let's give Tali a bit of alone time with her boyfriend." She said to Garrus as Tali headed over to Reegar.

"Boyfriend? Maybe I should have a word with him..." She hit him at that.

"Leave the poor guy alone, Garrus. But I know what you mean, Tali is like a little sister, huh?"

"Yeah. You actually managed to hug her earlier." He pointed out and she hit him again.

"Baka. Of course I did. Like I said, she's like a little sister to me. I guess all of the crew are like my family at this point."

"Yeah, you've managed to make friends with everyone." He said and she nodded.

"Yeah, it is different, isn't it? We used to pretty much keep to ourselves back on the SR1."

"Yeah but back on the SR1 no one was crazy enough to put up with either of us. Well, except for Wrex and Tali and even they had their limits." She snorted at that as they entered the shuttle and finally managed to take off their helmets.

"It's so strange though. I'm getting on with everyone. I mean, even Jacob and Miranda are alright. Although, I'm still not a Kelly fan. She's _way_ too friendly. It spooks me a little." Garrus laughed at that as he sat down next to her.

"I think it spooks everyone." She laughed, shaking her head.

"I do feel a little bad, though. I always take you with me on missions so some people just get left on the ship constantly. Hell, I think Thane only left the ship when we went to help with his son which I feel bad about. I mean, he's always really nice to me and even though he wouldn't say anything I get the feeling he's getting a little restless when I talk to him." She said, leaning back in her chair.

"So, you talk to Thane often?" She frowned a little before shrugging.

"As much as anyone I guess... Wait, are you still jealous?" She asked, still frowning as she heard the familiar tones in his sub-harmonics. "Didn't we already go over this? I mean, sure Thane's an awesome shot but he's got nothing on you. Unless... that's not what this is about..." He sighed at that and she tried to figure out what was wrong.

"Look, I'm just being stupid ani. It's just that he's clearly... interested in you." She frowned at that, shaking her head.

"No, he's not. Garrus, he spends all of his time talking about his dead wife. And, even if he was interested, it wouldn't matter. We went over this Garrus, I'm not interested in anyone but you."

"I know, ani. It just... turians are sometimes a little territorial and it's difficult to stop it when I see the way he looks at you." She shook her head, smiling a little.

"Okay, I admit it's a little sweet that you care so much but you need to knock this off. Okay? I'm not interested in anyone else, not even a little bit."

"Okay, ani. I'll knock it off." He said, smiling at her.

"Good. Now, it's probably going to be a while before Tali returns and we have to rush off to pick up that IFF so right now I'm going to prove to you once and for all that _you_ are the one I'm interested in." She said, pulling herself onto his lap as she ran her armoured hand along the underside of his fringe, eliciting a growl from him.

* * *

"Shepard-Commander." Shepard stopped dead as, after she'd thrown the last husk over the side of the railing, the sniper had stood up and revealed itself to be a geth.

"Shepard..." Garrus groaned as he saw the look in her eye.

"It's a _geth_..." He frowned.

"Yes, Shepard. A geth. Like all of those ones we killed while fighting Saren." She shook her head, her eyes wide.

"But it _talked_, Garrus. It's a _talking_ geth!" She exclaimed like a kid in a toy shop.

"It's a talking geth in the middle of a dead Reaper. How can that be a good thing?" He asked but her grin refused to fade. It was quite possibly the most interesting discovery she'd ever made and she tended to get excited over the little ones.

"It's _talking_. Have you never wondered what a geth would say if it could talk?" She asked, practically bouncing. He sighed.

"No, amazingly it never crossed my mind." He said, shaking his head as she lead them further into the Reaper.

"Fuck Shepard. You're crazier than I thought." Jack chimed in but Shepard simply beamed, shaking her head.

"A _talking_ geth..." She said again causing both Garrus and Jack to groan in unison.

* * *

"You activated the geth, didn't you?" Garrus asked as Shepard practically bounced into the Main Battery, grinning.

"Maybe..." She said and he sighed.

"Did you take back up with you?" She looked a little sheepish at that and he groaned. "Your disregard for your own life is staggering sometimes Jane."

"Oh, come on Garrus, don't insult me. Are you seriously saying that I couldn't take down _one_ geth?" He sighed shaking his head.

"No, you're right. It's just... weird. And Tali is going to... what was that phrase you used the other day? 'Have a shit-fit'?" Shepard looked a little put-out at that.

"Yeah, she is, isn't she? I'd better go and tell her now. But, Legion's alright. Apparently not all geth have sided with the Reapers and he's one of the good ones. I like him." Garrus sighed at that. Of course of all of the people she's ever met, the one who she'd take to right away would be a geth. Between his sub-harmonics and their connection he might as well have said his thoughts out loud.

"Well, to be fair, I liked EDI when I first met her too. I had to sort of force myself to be wary of her. Plus, I liked you right away as well." She said, still smiling. He sighed before smiling back.

"I would keep arguing but your excitement is so infectious. It might actually be able to stop Tali from going at your new friend with a shotgun..." He joked but she bit her lip a little.

"Yeah, I'd better go explain things to her before this gets out of hand... Plus I might need her help, Legion asked me to help him stop the bad geth, the ones allied with the Reapers, from attacking the good geth." She explained, pushing her galsses up her nose.

"Why is it called Legion? And are they really 'good' geth?" Garrus asked and she shrugged.

"EDI came up with the name, it's a bible quote or something, and until Legion's group of geth do something to prove that they are bad then, yes, they are 'good' geth." He put his hands up in surrender.

"Alright, alright. Just don't let Tali hear you say that." At that Shepard cringed a little, really not looking forward to explaining it to her friend...


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

Shepard could have killed Garrus. She was sure he did it on purpose, just to annoy her. They had found that the weird connection between them was dependant on how close they were to each other. Of course they hadn't tested it across different systems but it seemed that once they were no longer on the same planet/ship/space station it morphed into the strange tugging feeling and they found that only strong emotions were transmitted across it and they had to concentrate. However, if they were stood in close proximity they were very much aware of what they other was feeling and if they concentrated they could even share images or bits of memories.

So, of course, when they were trapped in the shuttle headed to Illium with every other member of the crew he would decide to think about the times they'd been alone in the shuttle. And he made sure she knew that he was thinking about it, prompting her own memories. And she had a _really_ good memory.

She tried to convey her annoyance but she was having a hard time concentrating. She eventually bit her lip _hard,_ trying to keep her mind clear, her sub-harmonics suddenly exploding at him with annoyance and frustration which, of course, made Mordin and Thane turn their heads to look at her and she blushed.

"Sorry. Garrus is being annoying..." She explained, causing the turian to smirk. "Baka." She muttered, hitting him as hard as she could without her biotics, suspecting that it wasn't very hard through his armour. Mordin had been spending the trip so far on his omni-tool and he returned to it, nodding.

"Yes, yes. Brain wave spikes almost reaching asari levels." He said as Shepard sat next to him, looking at his omni-tool.

"Do you have a brain scanner as part of your omni-tool?" She asked excitedly, her reaction causing Garrus to laugh gently.

"Yes. Added it last month to observe you two. Results interesting." At that point he and Shepard started talking so hurriedly and quietly that no one could make out what they were saying but the entire crew seemed confused and Garrus realised that no one but Mordin knew of the weird connection that existed between he and Jane except for what they'd seen of it in battle.

Eventually the shuttle touched down and Shepard turned to the crew.

"Okay, we're just here for a quick supply run while EDI tests the IFF. I want to be as ready as possible before we head through the Omega 4 relay. That being said, I can handle this on my own so you guys can go off and do whatever you want for the next four hours. Have fun!" She smiled as everyone headed off in groups, apart from Legion.

"Shepard-Commander, this unit does not have any requirements in this area and we do not wish to cause alarm in the near-by organics. We request to remain on board the shuttle." Shepard frowned at that. While Legion did have a point, it seemed unfair to leave him just because he was a geth. But, then again, the logic was sound and she hated it when people questioned her own logic on emotional grounds and she couldn't imagine the geth would like it any better.

"Very well Legion but if you want to come with me you are more than welcome." She said, settling on a compromise of simply offering him a third solution.

"Thank you Shepard-Commander but we shall remain here." She nodded her head in acknowledgement before turning to Garrus who was the only crew member left.

"That was cruel." She said, referring to the events in the shuttle.

"Maybe but I can't help what I think about and I figured I could at least get some entertainment out of my discomfort." She laughed at that.

"Fair enough. And I promise when we return to the ship we can relive those memories but for now I have to go shopping. Is there anything you need to pick up?"

"Yeah, one or two things. I'll meet back up with you once I've got them, okay?" She nodded.

"Sure, just message once you're done."

* * *

Garrus had been getting ready to message Shepard to tell her that he was finished buying his weapon mods when he suddenly felt a shock followed by a rush of adrenaline. It took him a few moments to figure out that those feelings were coming from Jane and not himself. That was when his omni-tool beeped.

_Everybody return to the shuttle. We're headed back to the Normandy. NOW. - JPS_

He looked at Jane's message and he knew that something had happened to the ship as he headed back to the shuttle. His thoughts were confirmed as he arrived and saw Jane pacing, frantically typing on her omni-tool.

"Jane?" She didn't look up at him, still typing away.

"The IFF was a trap. The Collectors attacked the Normandy. The ship's fine but Joker's the only one left and he had to unshackle EDI to get rid of them. It's not good." Garrus frowned.

"They took the crew?" She nodded, still refusing to look him in the eye. She needed to keep going, to keep going over every aspect to calculate her chances of retrieving her crew and to figure out how to improve them. Instead of trying to stop her Garrus just stood next to her, his presence calming her enough so that she could think straight as everyone else arrived and she explained the problem.

* * *

It had been hours since Shepard had taken her nose out of her omni-tool but she had finally done every conceivable calculation and was as prepared as she could be but there was still an entire night cycle before they reached the Omega 4 relay and she knew that sleep would not be easy. She began to pace, feeling uneasy. Eventually she hit the speaker on the wall and it selected a random song from her collection.

"_There's a boy with his head,_  
_Pressed up to the window,_  
_Of a bus heading out of town,_  
_In his breath on the glass,_  
_He draws with his finger,_  
_A map of the roads they go down,_  
_Circles of street lights,_  
_Are the only signal,_  
_That there's people out there in the black,_  
_He waves goodbye, to the town he grew up in,_  
_He knows that he'll never come back._

_The night outside is five below,_  
_His heart is pumping blood,_  
_On his lips a perfect smile,_  
_His eyes begin to flood._

_Because tonight's the kind of night,_  
_Where everything could change,_  
_Tonight's the kind of night,_  
_Where everything could change._" She sang along, trying to focus on her breathing as memories of her trip from the Citadel to Biotic Training flooded her mind.

Just as she was about to start pacing again she heard a knock at her door and opened it to find Garrus holding a bottle of wine and a packet of sweets.

"I figured you'd need something stronger than what we were drinking before Ilos." She smiled at that, indicating that he should come in. For once he wasn't wearing his armour but was instead in civies and she found it a little distracting.

"Thanks Garrus. I was panicking a bit." She admitted, sitting down next to him on the sofa.

"I know, ani." She smiled a little sheepishly at that.

"I've run through all of the numbers and our chances are quite good, given what we're up against, but they're not great." She poured herself a glass of wine and began to drink it but he simply shook his head.

"Jane, I know it doesn't look good but we've beaten the odds before. Hell, I'm sure that according to the krogan it's a cosmic imperative that we succeed." She smiled at that but shook her head.

"Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid." She said and he laughed a little.

"Maybe not but we have both so we're pretty much guaranteed a success." She smiled at that but she took a deep breath, getting ready for what she was about to say.

"I know Garrus but there's still a chance that this doesn't end well and I don't want this to be like last time. I don't want anything left unsaid. I know that turians don't fall in love easily so I didn't want to tell you this because I didn't want to pressure you or anything but I can't leave it unsaid like I did last time.

"I'm in love with you, Garrus. I was perfectly fine and then out of no where you showed up and changed my entire life just by being near me. Suddenly everything that was great about the world before is dull and boring unless you're there too. I couldn't imagine not being with you Garrus and the thought that things might not end well tomorrow..." Garrus sat there, stunned as she repeated to him his feeling for her. "I get that you probably don't feel the same way, I mean you said yourself that turians don't really fall in love unless they find their bondmate but I just... I just wanted you to know." She finished nervously, looking away from him. He shook his head in disbelief before finally finding his voice.

"I never gave you an exact translation of 'ani'." He admitted and she frowned at him, trying to figure out what he was saying. "It means 'my heart' and it's what bondmates call each other. I just... I knew that humans fell in and out of love easily and it wasn't permanent like it is for turians so I didn't tell you exactly how I felt because I didn't want to scare you off.

"I'm in love with you, Jane. You're my bondmate and that pretty much means I'll always be in love with you..." He trailed off, unsure of how she would respond. He stole a glance at her to see her reaction and realised that she was leaning close to him, her arms wrapping around his neck as she leant her forehead to his.

"Garrus, I know that humans don't really have an equivelent of bondmates, at least not one that's always taken seriously, but from the moment you told me what it meant I realised that it described my feelings for you exactly. You're not getting rid of me easily." He laughed a little at that.

"Good because I don't want you going anywhere." She smiled in response, pressing her lips to his mouth plates as she pulled his body closer to hers. It was no longer a question of whether or not they would succeed in the morning. They _had_ to.

* * *

Shepard's eyes darted across the holographic representation of the Collector base, memorising it while looking for any and all weaknesses.

"Here, maybe we can send some in through the vents." She said, gesturing at the image

"Practically a suicide mission. I volunteer." Jacob spoke up but she shook her head. He wouldn't be able to unlock the doors.

"I appreciate the thought Jacob but you couldn't shut down the security systems in time. We need to send a tech expert." Miranda said and Shepard almost smiled as she realised that she and Miranda were on the same page.

"It's your call Commander. Who do we send into the shaft?" Shepard's eyes swept her crew but she'd made up her mind the second they'd said 'tech expert'.

"We need someone with tech skills to hack the security systems. Tali, you're up." She turned to her friend who stood proud.

"I won't let you down." Shepard nodded, ignoring her emotions as best she could in order to make the logical decisions.

"The rest of us will break into two teams and fight down each passage. That should draw the Collectors away from what you're doing." Shepard explained, pushing her glasses up her nose.

"I'll lead the second fire team, Shepard. We'll meet up with you on the other side of the doors." Miranda said but Shepard shook her head a little. The majority of the team didn't trust Miranda.

"Not so fast, Cheerleader. Nobody wants to take orders from you." Jack voiced Shepard's concerns causing Miranda to frown.

"This isn't a popularity contest; lives are at stake. Shepard - you need someone who can command loyalty through experience." Shepard almost sighed aloud. Miranda was right but the crew didn't trust her, they needed someone they had fought alongside as often as her.

_Are you sure?_ Garrus asked her silently as he realised what she she thinking.

_You're a good leader Garrus and it needs to be someone the crew trusts._ She replied.

_What about your six?_ She frowned a little.

_I know Garrus, I want you there but you're the only one who can lead them as well as I can._ She almost cringed as images of Omega flooded his mind.

_Garrus, it won't be like that. I promise, ani._ He re-focused on the present as she used the term for bondmate in her mind, reminding him that she had faith in him.

"Garrus - you're in charge of the second team." She said aloud and he simply nodded. The mission wasn't going to be easy but they both had a reason to come back and that might just be the reason they won this thing...


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

"Shepard. You're making a habit of costing me more than time and money."

"I'm sorry, I'm having trouble hearing you. I'm getting a lot of bullshit on this line." Shepard was rarely this short tempered with people but the Illusive Man had reached the end of her patience. Few people had ever seen what she was like when she decided that she'd had enough and chose to bite back but the Illusive Man was learning anout her temper the hard way. The 'I-just-blew-up-your-Collector-base' way...

"Don't try my patience Shepard. The technology from that base could have secured human dominance in the galaxy. Against the Reapers and beyond." Shepard just snorted at that.

"Human dominance or just Cerberus?" She asked, narrowing her eyes.

"Strength for Cerberus is strength for every human. Cerberus is humanity. I should have known you choke on the hard decisions. Too idealistic from the start." She just shook her head at that.

"I know what you are. And the price of dealing with you. We do things my way from now on. Harbinger is coming. And he won't be alone. I'm going to make sure we're ready when they get here. You can fall in line or step aside. But don't get in my way."

"You're sure that's what you want? You're taking a hell of a risk Shepard." She just shook her head at that. It made her uncomfortable how alike she and the Illusive Man were. He served as a reminder of what would happen if she ever lost sight of her compassion and ideals.

"I don't think so. I'm going to stop the Reapers. But I won't sacrifice the soul of our species to do it." She said, leaving the room before leaning against the wall. The ship was a wreak but it could be repaired. The important thing was that she had retrieved her crew and destroyed the base without losing anyone. They had made it.

"Joker, dock at Omega. I think we all need a drink." Shepard said over the intercom, smiling as cheers rang across the ship in reply.

* * *

Garrus watched the rest of the crew as they celebrated in Afterlife. Even Legion was present as they all joked together, laughing at a drunken Grunt and chatting away about anything and everything. As he finished his drink he scanned the bar for any sign of Shepard and ended up shaking his head as he realised that she must have slipped away a little while ago.

He headed back to the ship, smiling as a familiar sound rang across the CIC as entered the airlock.

"_Oh, well in 5 years time,_  
_We could be walking around a zoo,_  
_With the sun shining down over me and you,_  
_And there will be love in the bodies of the elephants too,_  
_And I'll put my hands over your eyes but you'll peek through,_

_And there will be sun sun sun all over our bodies,_  
_And sun sun sun all down our necks,_  
_And there will be sun sun sun all over our faces,_  
_And sun sun sun so what the heck._" She stopped singing momentarily as he found her underneath the terminal by the galaxy map.

"EDI, is that the last listening device?" She asked, not realising that he was there.

"Yes, Shepard. The ship is now completely free from Cerberus control." The AI replied and Shepard smiled in response as she pulled herself out from under the terminal to come face-to-face with Garrus.

"So, this is why you left me at the bar?" He asked and she shrugged.

"Sorry Garrus but everyone deserved a break and this really needed to be done." She said, sitting herself up on the terminal.

"It's alright, I would just rather celebrate with you than with the rest of the crew." She smiled at that, wrapping her legs around his waist and arms around his neck.

"Same." She said as he leant his forehead to hers.

"So, what now?" He asked and she shrugged a little.

"The Reapers are still coming but we've got time. Now it's just a case of preparing and trying to convince others to prepare but things won't be as hectic for a while so we'll have time to focus on us, which I think we should start right now." She said, pulling him closer to her as he ran his hands down her back until they ran down under her legs and he hoisted her up, carrying her towards the elevator.

"If you are trying to impress me with this display of manliness, it's working." She joked, grinning.

"Of course it is, ani." He remarked simply and she laughed before she lowered her mouth to the soft skin of his neck as her fingers worked on undoing the clasps of his armour.

* * *

"How long until the others start to make their way back onto the ship?" Garrus asked her as he lay next to her on the floor of her quarters where she had put a make-shift bed since her own had been damaged in the attack.

"Dunno. We've probably got another hour or so. Why?" She asked, running her fingers idly over his plates.

"I need to go and get changed." She rolled her eyes at that.

"Garrus, you've slept up here every night since we started going out. Face it, you moved in a while ago. You just haven't moved your stuff yet." He chuckled a little at that.

"Jane, I think that's the worst invitation to move in with anyone I've ever heard." She hit him lightly at that.

"Baka. So, get a lot of invitations to move in with girls, do you?" She joked, making him laugh.

"Of course, I'm _me_, remember?" She laughed at that.

"Of course I do. So, is that a yes?" He pulled her a little closer to him.

"And get to be around you all of the time? How could I say no?" She laughed at that before he spoke up again.

"So, how long until the repairs are done?" He asked, causing her to shrug.

"We'll be back on our feet in a week. It'll take a little longer to get us back to where we were but it's not too bad." He gave the turian equivalent of a raised eyebrow at that.

"Jane, we're sleeping on the floor." She shrugged. Her bed and the fish tank had taken the worst of the damage to her quarters.

"At least I didn't have any fish in that thing." She reasoned and he chuckled a little.

"So, where's our first stop after we make the repairs?" Ha asked and she sighed.

"Liara, I think. The Illusive Man was nice enough to send us some information on the Shadow Broker that she might find interesting just before we hit the Omega 4 Relay. Plus, I'm hoping that she can give us some info on who might be willing to listen to us about the Reapers." He nodded.

"Does it seem strange to you that it was so easy to cut out ties to Cerberus?" He asked and she snorted.

"Easy's not the word I'd use but, yeah... I don't think we've seen the last of the Illusive Man but I think a lot of things added up in our favour that he didn't see coming like Miranda quitting and EDI being unshackled." She reasoned.

"Yeah, I'll admit, the Miranda thing came as a surprise to me too. But it's nice to not be looking over my shoulder on the ship any more." She nodded in agreement.

"I know what you mean... I guess without the Illusive Man watching me any more I should probably contact my family before they start to think I'm ignoring them..." She figured and he made a general sound of agreement but she felt his grief over their connection. "What is it Garrus?" He shook his head in response.

"Nothing. Just, I haven't been home in a long time and my mom is sick. My sister's looking after her but I haven't really spoken to either of them since before you showed up on Omega. I haven't wanted them to worry..." He said, gesturing vaguely to the bandage over his face. Jane raised her hand to his face, tracing around the bandage.

"I'm sorry, Garrus. What about your dad? When did you last speak to him?" Garrus sighed at that.

"Just before you showed up on Omega... I figured I wasn't going to make it and I also realised that I'd been an idiot for ignoring everything he'd tried to teach me..." He trailed off, his mind wandering back to Omega.

"Oh Garrus..." She said as he nuzzled her palm. "I'll make you a deal, after we get the info we need from Liara, we'll take a little time and you can visit your family and I'll visit mine." He nodded at that, almost smiling a little.

"Any idea how you're going to tell your parents that you're shacking up with a turian?" She pulled a face at that.

"Meh. They'll probably just be glad that I found someone but I can't be certain. What about you?" Then it was his turn to pull a face.

"They might not be overly impressed but they'll accept you as my bondmate. They kind of have to." He said as he pulled her closer to him.

"So, you're not wishing that you'd fallen for a nice turian girl?" He shook his head at that.

"Not at all. You wishing you'd fallen for a nice human guy?" She shook her head, smiling a little.

"Not at all."


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

"So, what did I miss while I was out?" Garrus asked as they returned from the Shadow Broker's ship. Liara's ship. Shepard just smirked, unsure of how to describe everything and, as Garrus had pointed out, she was terrible at telling stories. Instead she just concentrated, sending him the memories as best she could.

"The old fashioned way, huh?" He laughed, refering to how she'd beaten the huge creature with just her fists.

"He threatened you and then knocked you out, he had it coming." She said and he held her close as she remembered her anger when he'd been thrown across the room. "You'd think that this connection would stop that moment of panic when I see you get badly hit. I get over it quickly but it's that initial, terrifying moment, you know?" She murmured into his chest as he brought his hand to her hair as the shuttle approached the Normandy.

"Of course I do, ani. I get those moments all the time with you." She smiled a little at that.

"Yeah, I guess I'd be kind of a nightmare to care about..." She said a little sheepishly.

"Absolutely. The worst. But it's worth it, Jane." He replied, making her smile. How was it that he always knew what to say?

"You're worth it too Garrus but it's still, hands down, the scariest thing I've ever been through and I've been through some scary things." He laughed at that.

"I'll say. Although it does make me wonder what comes in second on your list of scariest experiences." He said and she looked a little awkward.

"Honestly? Remember Conrad Verner..." He looked at her incredulously.

"So, you're saying that you've faced Collectors and Reapers and the one thing that scared you the most was one, slightly crazed fan?" She nodded, her eyes a little wide at the memory. Like a deer in the headlights, as he'd heard humans say.

"Yeah. I know it sounds dumb but I'm terrible with _normal_ social interaction and I had no idea how to handle that shit. He's lucky that I didn't freak out and just punch him or something..." She admitted, smiling self-deprecatingly. He just shook his head and pulled her close to him again.

"How did I manage to meet someone crazier than me?" He joked, still shaking his head as she laughed.

"Funny, I was about to ask the same question." She joked back as the shuttle docked with the Normandy. "Now, come on. We have to get changed before Liara shows up." She said, heading into the ship.

"Does that mean..?" He asked but she shook her head quickly catching his meaning.

"Is that all you ever think about?" He snorted, putting his arm around her waist.

"No more than you." She just shrugged at that.

"Maybe... But no, Liara's going to be here soon and, if you're anything to go by, turians don't understand the meaning of the term 'quickie'." He shook his head at that.

"We really don't..."

* * *

"Liara, I have missed you _so_ much." Shepard said as she sat next to her friend, drinking a beer. "No one on this ship understands when I just want peace and quiet for a while. I need my fellow introvert." She said, causing Garrus to frown playfully.

"Hey, I understand it just fine." He said, causing her to roll her eyes.

"Yeah, you _understand_ it but instead of telling everyone to back off, you seem to find it more fun to just fuck with me." She said accusingly before she realised what she had said. "I didn't mean it like that! I'm meant, you know, annoy me..." She flustered, utterly embarrassed as her face turned red. Liara and Garrus chuckled gently.

"I never thought I'd see the Great Commander Shepard make such a comment." He joked and she hit him in response.

"Baka. You're one to talk Garrus, or should I bring up the 'popping the heat sink' comment you made last week?" He looked a little flustered at that and she chuckled.

"I still can't believe you said that..." She laughed as she put her hand in his.

"I'm glad you two finally got together." Liara finally spoke up. "I thought you'd dance around each other forever..." She gave them a look and they both looked a little sheepish.

"God, were we really _that_ obvious to everyone? Even on the SR1?" Shepard asked, shaking her head.

"Not on the SR1 necessarily. I know Wrex figured it out but that was more to do with your connection in battle than anything else. I don't think that it really occurred to anyone else as a possibility but I'm an asari. Cross-species relationships are the norm from my perspective." She said, shrugging.

"Anyway, I'm just glad you've both got something to fight for now. A future together."

* * *

"Hey, Garrus?" Shepard asked as she curled up next to him in their new bed.

"Yeah?" She bit her lip a little, thinking of how to ask what she was thinking.

"You know what Liara said, about having a future together to fight for, do you ever think about that?" He frowned a little.

"I guess. Do you?" She shrugged.

"I don't know. I mean, I know that I want to be with you and that's not going to change but... specifics? I don't know, it's not as if any plans for the future ever work out anyway." She said, shrugging.

"Well, we might not both be spectres but we're still fighting bad guys together so I'd say our plans worked out alright." She smiled at that.

"Yeah, I guess they did, huh?" She laughed a little.

"So, say we defeat all of the Reapers, what would you want to do?" She frowned a little, thinking about it. What _did_ she want to do?

"Well, I guess the Normandy belongs to me. I mean, we may have stolen it from the Illusive Man but it's still _my_ ship and it's not as if I could ever imagine living anywhere that wasn't a ship so I think I'd like to just live on the Normandy with you. No real objective or mission or anything, just wandering from system to system, righting any wrongs we happen across and the like..." She smiled as she thought about he ridiculous plan.

"Like vigilantes? I like it..." She grinned at that.

"Yeah, we'd be like the intergalactic A-Team..." He grinned back, getting lost with her in her ridiculous plan for the future. "But most importantly, no one would be able to find us if we didn't want them to. We'd just disappear from the galaxy so that the likes of that reporter woman (Khalisah?) and Conrad Verner can't bother us." He grinned with her, allowing himself to get lost in her imaginary future with her.

"Sounds perfect to me..."

* * *

Shepard woke next to Garrus, frowning at a beeping noise coming from across the room. As the haze of tiredness lifted from her mind, she realised that it was her terminal alerting her to a vidcall. She bolted upright, quickly pulling on her pants and top before quickly checking herself in the bathroom mirror as Garrus growled at the noise, still half-asleep.

"Apex predator my ass. You'll be killed in your sleep..." She said, shaking her head.

"Don't care..." He muttered sleepily, causing her to chuckle.

"Okay, then. Just, be quiet, I have no idea who this is." She said hurriedly and heard him mumble in agreement before she accepted the call. She almost did a double-take at the grey haired woman on the screen, her dark eyes peering through round-framed glasses.

"Hello? Jane?" Jane let a disbelieving laugh escape her lips.

"Gran Elle? Why are you calling me? _How_ are you calling me? We're too far out for a call from Earth." Her gran just smiled at her.

"I'm not on Earth, petal. I've been looking into off-world locations to open a new bakery. I'm just calling to say that in a month I'll be on the Citadel for a couple of weeks so if you have the time, you should come by. I feel as if I haven't seen you in ages." Jane shook her head.

"That might have to do with the two year coma, Gran." She joked, shaking her head. "But, yes, I should be more than able to meet up with you then."

"Alright then, petal. I'd better go, these calls cost a lot of credits." Jane nodded.

"Sure Gran. See you then." She said, hanging up.

"Coma?" Garrus asked, still a little sleepy, as she crawled back down next to him.

"Yeah, that's what I'm going to tell my family. It gives me the same excuse for not contacting them without making them worry too much about the fact that I was dead." She said, shrugging.

"So, that was your gran?" She nodded.

"Yep. I told you I was going to contact my family. My mom messaged back and said that she and my dad would meet up with me the next time she had shore leave. This was my gran messaging me back, I guess. Did you ever message your family?" She asked, not wanting to upset him but also knowing that he had to face them at some point...

"Yeah." He sighed, focusing on his hand that was playing with her hair. "I messaged Sol, my sister, and she told me that she and Mom would be on the Citadel next month to try some new treatment. I said I'd try to meet them then." Jane nodded at that, her hand moving to his face, tracing his blue facial markings with her fingers.

"Well, it shouldn't take more than a month to look into all of those contacts and info Liara gave us so once we're done we'll head to the Citadel." She said, sighing a little at the thought of explaining the last few months to her parents.

"Still haven't figured out how to tell them you're shacking up with a turian?" He asked jokingly, causing her to shake her head at him.

"No, it's not that. Well, maybe it's a little that. But mostly it's just... the last few months have been crazy and explaining them is going to be _really_ crazy. You're just the tip of the crazy iceberg." He sighed.

"I know what you mean. I mean, how am I going to explain this?" He gestured to his bandage. "But there's nothing we can do for now so let's just take our minds off of it." He said and she smiled as he pulled her close to him and began to pull at her clothing.

"I'll say it again; all you ever think about..." She said, grinning as he grinned back.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

Shepard was unsure of how to act with Garrus in public. On Omega no one gave them a second glance, she figured all kinds of interspecies relationships were common there, so she had never really thought about it while they were there and it was never a concern on the ship because it was their home and all of the xenophobes had bolted the second they'd cut ties with Cerberus.

The Citadel, on the other hand, was a different story. They had wondered about it while they were on Illium but, again, it was on the edge of the Terminus Systems and a lot of things were okay there that weren't in Council space. Plus, in the days before she became the Shadow Broker, Illium had been Liara's turf and they could trust that she wouldn't let information about their relationship leave orbit.

So, Shepard was deliberately keeping her distance in order to let Garrus decide how he wanted to play things and was a little surprised when he took her hand.

"Jane, I don't care what others think about our relationship. In fact, I struggle to not want to tell everyone in sight about it." She smiled at that.

"I know, me too. I just wasn't sure if you wanted people to know or not." She shrugged, still smiling as he pulled her to his side.

"Jane, you're my bondmate and I'm not ashamed of that fact." She bit her lip at that.

"I know Garrus, I feel the same but... I guess I'm just a little worried that the second this becomes _real_ to anyone outside the ship and our friends, it'll complicate things." She admitted and he sighed.

"That doesn't mean I want to hide our relationship." He said, keeping a hold of her hand.

"Me neither. Although, I'm guessing you want to explain this to your sister before she sees it so you might want to let go of my hand for now." She pointed out and he nodded, giving her hand a quick squeeze before letting go.

"Where are the rest of the crew?" He asked, trying to keep their minds off of what was to come.

"Thane is visiting his son, the rest of the guys, including Legion, have decided to head straight for the nearest bar and Kasumi organised a shopping trip with all of the girls, they're going to meet the guys back at the bar later along with Thane and, if we're done, us. Kasumi even included Miranda and Samara agreed to go but I think that has more to do with me booting everyone off the ship for a few hours than anything else..." Garrus gave her a quizzical look.

"Why has everyone been booted off?" He asked and she grinned a little.

"Well, I got sick of flying under Cerberus colours so I ordered a paintjob, which Joker is overseeing. It shouldn't take too long so he'll be with the other soon enough but I think he likes the alone time with EDI. Those two have been getting really close since she was unshackled." She was still grinning and he had to admit, Joker and EDI had been getting along much better recently.

"So, are you just wiping the Cerberus logos off or are you replacing them?" He asked and her grin widened.

"I know that the Normandy is a pretty recognisable ship but it didn't feel right to not have any distinguishing features so I used this." She pulled up a logo on her omni-tool that appeared to be a phoenix with angel's wings.

"It's... perfect. When did you come up with it?" She shrugged, looking a little self-conscious.

"Honestly? It's just a redesign of something I made back on the SR1, just after we'd made up our crime-fighting nicknames. Obviously the phoenix part is new, originally it was two angels. Anyway, a few weeks ago I was trying to restore some more of my old omni-tool files that I'd lost when I died and I came across this. I wanted to get rid of the Cerberus logo and I figured that with a little reworking this would be awesome. I like this, Garrus. I like what I've got right now, with my family of crazies on _our_ ship. Not Cerberus's, not the Alliance's but _ours_. Is it bad that I'm this happy to not have to answer to anyone but myself?" She asked and he shook his head, laughing a little.

"Not at all. But, then again, it is me you're asking." He pointed out and she laughed at that as they continued through to the Presidium.

They were headed to the park just outside Huerta Memorial Hospital in order to meet his sister before his mother. He needed Sol to know about what he'd been doing before they decided what to tell their mother. He was unsure of how Sol would react to Shepard. He knew that Sol was angry about the fact that he hadn't been to visit in over a year and that she might blame Shepard for it.

The first thing Shepard saw of Solana Vakarian was a grey-blue blur tackle Garrus. Her biotics began to pulse before the blur detached itself from Garrus, revealing itself to be a turian female with blue facial markings. Shepard had only seen a handful of turian females before but could still recognise them by the shorter fringes. Solana was only a little shorter than Garrus and Shepard had always figured that he was tall, even for a turian. Shepard let her biotics dissipate, not wanting to seem hostile towards her bondmate's sister. Upon closer inspection, it was clear that they were siblings by the similarity in their features.

Shepard had no trouble recognising the look of shock on her face as she pulled away from her brother and saw his wounds.

"_Spirits_, Garrus! What happened to you?" She asked, causing him to sigh.

"Hi Sol, it's nice to see you too..." He said sarcastically, causing her to give him a look.

"Okay, I get it. The hole in your face is a touchy subject." She said, sighing as she folded her arms and looked him over. "Well, at least that's the only damage you've taken. Can I assume that this is why you haven't called?" Garrus shifted uncomfortably at that.

"I didn't want you to worry." He explained sheepishly causing Solana to shake her head.

"I worried _anyway_ Garrus. I haven't seen you since you dropped off the grid over two years ago." The hurt was evident in her voice and Garrus tried to fight back the wave of guilt as his sub-harmonics trilled with apology. It was rare for turians to say the words 'I'm sorry' because if they were then it was evident in their sub-harmonics. Solana's rang back with acceptance but it didn't stop the guilt already building within him. He should have been there for his family but he had instead lost sight of what he had in the face of what he had lost...

At that point Shepard put all of her concentration into sending him her understanding and empathy through their bond and he smiled at her a little, realising that she had been forgotten in his reunion with his sister. It always surprised him at how she could easily transition from being the object of everyone's attention to a nameless shadow. At the moment she was blending into the background so well that he figured that Solana hadn't even realised that she was there. Or, at least, hadn't until Garrus had smiled at her.

"Sol, this is Commander Shepard, my CO." Shepard had wondered how he was going to introduce her at first. She agreed with him that it was probably a good idea to ease his sister into it, rather than just dropping the bondmate bomb on her from the get go.

"I thought you were dead." She remarked coldly, her sub-harmonics relaying the fact that she wasn't too fond of the commander.

"I was only mostly dead." She replied, her back straight with her hands clasped behind her back. Garrus recognised this as her 'Commander Shepard' stance and remembered it from when he'd first seen her again on the Citadel, Kaidan and Ashley trailing behind her... But the stance was not as fake as it had been that day, instead she genuinely had more self-confidence and a little humour played in her eyes.

"You speak Turian." Solana remarked, her mandibles widening a little with shock. Shepard shrugged.

"One of the benefits of being rebuilt is the ability to add things here and there, like a second voice-box." Shepard said, smiling a bit. She was nervous as hell, Garrus could feel it, but she was doing an excellent job of keeping it hidden. The only give away was her hands twisting behind her back and he knew she was resisting the urge to mess with her hair.

"A lot of trouble to go to just to learn Turian." Solana remarked and Garrus felt Shepard's mind draw a blank so he stepped up for her.

"She doesn't just speak Turian, Sol." He said but his sister largely ignored him although Shepard sent him her thanks.

"He's right. I speak a little Salarian and bits and piece of Drell but, since I spend most of my time with Garrus, I'm much better with Turian." She reasoned as Solana narrowed her eyes.

"So, if you're his CO then you're responsible for this?" She asked, indicating her brother's face. Shepard took a deep breath, unsure of how to defend herself. It was her fault. Garrus probably wouldn't have gone to Omega if she hadn't died and even then she couldn't escape the feeling that if she'd just been a little faster... Garrus growled a little as he followed her train of thought.

"Sol, that was before Shepard came back. There was _nothing_ she could have done to stop it and if she hadn't shown up when she did I wouldn't be here right now." He was talking to Solana but it was obvious that his words were for Shepard who gave him a small, thankful smile but he began to feel her 'Commander Shepard' act falter a little. She felt his concern and heard it voiced at the edges of his sub-harmonics. She immediately riled up, her own sub-harmonics beginning to trill with defiance and a little anger. She hated it when he got concerned about her ability to cope with others. It had always been _her_ problem by it's very nature and she hated how it made her look weak. He trilled back with apology before she focused on a memory of her slicing through an army of husks, her sub-harmonics voicing her triumph as she drove home the point that she was not weak. His sub-harmonics still voiced apology but it was mixed with humour.

That was when Solana cleared her throat and they were reminded that they were not alone. They had become used to no one being able to hear their sub-harmonic conversations apart from Mordin and Thane, neither of whom were particularly bothered about listening in to their banter. Solana just looked between them as they both looked a little like kids caught with their hands in the cookie jar. She frowned before she shook her head.

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me!" She exclaimed, raising her hand to her fringe as she realised the consequences of what she'd just figured out.

"Sol..." Garrus started but she cut him off by raising her hand, still shaking her head.

"Dammit, Garrus. It's like you go out of your way to make my life difficult." She said, frustration evident in her voice before she took a deep breath and looked at the two of them. They were standing as close as possible to each other without actually touching, their body language told her that no matter what she said or what happened, they would be alright as long they had each other. All this time she'd been worried about her older brother and now she realised that she _really_ didn't have to be. The human spectre was clearly just as much in love with her brother as he was with her and Solana knew that although the commander might drag him into all kinds of danger, she would die before he actually got hurt. Sol was a turian and she was used to her family being in military service but her mother's sickness had driven home what it really meant to lose someone and she was determined to not let it happen again. And, although she hated to admit it, it took a special kind of idiot to think that separating bondmates wouldn't do more harm than good. Garrus was going to stick with this human no matter what and if she didn't accept that fact then she'd be left with even less family than she had now.

"I'm... I'm happy for you Garrus, I really am. This just... complicates things." She said finally, seeing the relief flash across her brother's face before quickly turning into concern for her.

"Sol, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left you alone to deal with this." Sol shook her head at that.

"Garrus, it's fine. I'm just glad you could visit but... it's bad, Gar. She probably only has a month or two left, despite the treatments you paid for, although they are keeping her lucid. And yes, I know that was you. You're not as sneaky as you think... Anyway, she decided that she wanted to return to the Citadel, to remember her days in C-Sec when she first met dad. She probably won't leave..." Sol trailed off at that and Garrus put his hand on his sister's shoulder, causing her to smile weakly at him, sub-harmonics trilling with thanks.

"Where is dad?" Garrus asked and Solana sighed.

"He had to return to Palaven to get some things... He'll be back next week. But Garrus, this has been hard on him." Solana didn't really have the words to explain what she meant but she didn't have to. Just the thought of having to watch, helpless, as his bondmate slowly slipped away from him was enough to chill his blood.

"I know, Sol." He said simply and Solana just nodded. She wondered if Garrus had known that Shepard was his bondmate when he'd heard of her death two years ago.

"Okay, then. Well, shall we go up and see mom? You'd better bring your bondmate too." Solana sighed, leading the way.

* * *

Shepard once again blended into the background as they entered Salina Vakarian's room. Even Shepard could see that the older female's face looked worn but it lit up as Garrus entered the room.

"Hi Mom." Garrus said, looking a little ashamed. He knew he should have visited sooner and he was afraid that she would be disappointed in him. However, despite his fears, his mother beamed at him, although she looked a little concerned.

"Garrus, I'm so glad you came." She smiled at him, grasping his hands in hers. "But what happened to your face?" She asked, causing Garrus to sigh through his own smile.

"Why is that the first thing everyone asks me?" He wondered and Shepard found herself suppressing a laugh. "I ended up using my face to stop a rocket. Not one of my best plans." He joked, causing his mother to shake her head.

"I suspect there's a story here. You'll have to tell me." She said but he shook his head.

"It's not a particularly good story. I've got some better ones, though." He said, causing Solana to speak up.

"I imagine the best stories involve Shepard." Sol said, putting her hand on Shepard's arm and drawing their mother's attention to her for the first time.

"I didn't see you there, dear." Salina remarked, causing Jane to look a little sheepish.

"Yeah, I get that a lot..." She said, smiling a little apologetically.

"It's alright, dear." Shepard tried not to squirm as the woman regarded her carefully. "I was wondering how long it would take my son to realise that you were his bondmate. He can be quite dense sometimes." Garrus and Solana spluttered in surprise but Shepard just grinned. She liked Salina, she decided.

"That he can be, Mrs Vakarian." She replied, her eyes sparkling with laughter as Garrus shook his head at both of them.

"Just call me Salina, dear." She said to Jane, both of them ignoring the two stunned siblings.

"How did you figure it out? _When_ did you figure it out?" Garrus finally managed and his mother just chucked.

"Garrus, I figured it out when I read the first message you sent home after joining the Normandy. It was pretty obvious." Garrus shook his head again and looked at Jane.

"Here was me thinking it was some big secret." He said as Jane linked her arm through his. She would have put her arm around his waist but she was very much aware that the gesture was a hell of a lot more intimate to turians than it was to humans. Not that her crew recognised the difference but his family probably would.

"To be fair, I ended up omitting everything I wrote about you from the messages I sent home because when I read back through them I realised I sounded like a love-sick schoolgirl. Which, looking back, I realise I kind of was." She admitted, blushing a little.

"Why wouldn't you be? It's _me_." She laughed at their old joke, hitting him lightly.

"Baka." She muttered as he lowered his forehead to hers and Solana made retching noises in response, earning her a look from her mother.


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

Shepard left the Vakarians to catch up after an hour or so. She almost laughed out loud with relief as she headed back towards through the wards to find out where the girls had got to. She hadn't really known what to expect from Garrus' family and was glad that at least his mother and sister seemed to like her. Although, they had all avoided talking about what his father's reaction would be which told her that it probably wouldn't be good. But it wasn't a problem right at that second so she decided to not worry about it as she wandered through the wards, pulling up her omni-tool to message Kasumi.

That was when she heard the scream.

She ran around the corner and into an alley to find two young human thugs, around seventeen years old, cornering a young girl who seemed about eleven. Her mind flooded with the memories of the day her biotics had just broken through as one of the thugs pulled a gun from his side and the all too familiar scene played out in front of her.

"Hey!" She said drawing their attention to her as her biotics flared. She smiled, clasping her hands behind her back and tilting her head to the side before raising an eyebrow and smiling condescendingly.

"I'm going to count to three and if either of you two are still standing here when I hit three, I'm going to paint the walls a very ugly red colour with my biotics." She said, staring at them through their glasses.

"One." The boy with the gun aimed it right at her head and she allowed her biotics to flare more intensely. The second boy kept switching his terrified gaze between Shepard and the first guy, his stance tensed to run.

"Two." The first boy shot a round but her biotics stopped it easily and she raised her eyebrows, causing the second boy to flee.

"Three." She had barely opened her mouth when the armed boy turned and ran away. She chuckled lightly as she reached down to where the girl was sitting on the ground, her left hand clutching a wound on her right arm where a bullet had grazed her before Shepard had shown up.

"Here." Shepard said calmly, handing the girl a pack of medi-gel. "What's your name?"

The girl applied the medi-gel, keeping her gaze level with Shepard's. She seemed scared, trying to decide whether or not she could trust Shepard. She narrowed her eyes before finally speaking. "I recognise you. You're that Spectre." She said and Shepard nodded, smiling reassuringly.

"Yes, I'm Commander Shepard." She said, still holding the girl's stare.

"I thought you were dead." The girl said suspiciously causing Shepard to smile a little more.

"Turns out I'm hard to kill." The girl nodded, seemingly accepting her answer. "What's your name?" Shepard asked, causing the girl to narrow her eyes again before she checked that the medi-gel on her arm was working.

"Kara." The girl said and Shepard nodded.

"Nice to meet you. Do you know why those boys were after you?" She asked and Kara nodded reluctantly.

"I saw something I shouldn't have. I... I decided to go to C-Sec." The girl's eyes flared with anger and sorrow.

"And they came after you?" She nodded. "Is there someone to call for you?" The girl shook her head and Shepard frowned slightly. She suspected that the girl wouldn't want to return to C-Sec but there wasn't anyone else who could deal with her. "Why didn't you stay at C-Sec?" The girl shrugged.

"They can't do anything. I'm too old. Smart kids stay silent. I'm not smart..." Shepard smiled at that.

"You're brave. I think that counts for more." She said, sincerely. The girl smiled a little at that. "Look, I've got a few friends at C-Sec, I'll make sure those thugs can't get you again." The girl nodded, seemingly not believing her. "Come on, let's see if I can help you out." Shepard said, standing up. She half expected the girl to just leave, having no reason to follow Shepard now that her wound was fixed other than the small hope that she might be able to help her out of her current predicament. After a few moments the girl nodded, standing up, seemingly deciding that Shepard at least had a chance of being able to help her.

As they moved towards C-Sec headquarters Shepard noticed that the girl was short for her age and skinny, the look in her eye the only indication that she wasn't as young as she seemed. Shepard figured she wouldn't be younger than ten but she couldn't be sure. She wondered how long the girl had been by herself and how long the thugs had been searching for her.

As they approached the C-Sec building Garrus appeared and Kara clutched Shepard's arm, ducking behind her.

"It's fine, he's a friend." She said to the girl and she nodded but she refused to move from behind her.

"I can't leave you alone for five minutes." Garrus remarked, shaking his head.

"I'm fine. You didn't have to come." She said, smiling at him as he shrugged.

"As if I wouldn't. Who's you friend?" He asked.

"This is Kara." The girl refused to move from behind Shepard as she regarded the turian carefully. "She's a little shy." She explained and Garrus nodded as they moved into the C-Sec building.

"Shepard. What can I do for you?" Bailey asked as they approached his desk.

"I was wondering if you could do me a favour, Bailey. My friend Kara here got attacked by a couple of young thugs. I managed to scare them off but she doesn't have anyone looking out for her. I was wondering if there was something you could do." Bailey looked at the young girl and sighed.

"I really wish that I could Shepard, but there are a lot of kids like that in the wards and she's too old for the system." Shepard gave him a pleading look.

"Please, there has to be something you can do, someone who'll look after her. I'll give you all of the Spectre authorisation you need and I'll pay any cost that the government won't but I can't just leave without knowing that she's safe." Bailey sighed before nodding his head.

"I think I've got an idea but I'll have to make some calls." Shepard nodded in response.

"I'll wait here with her until you're done." She walked over to the bench just outside of C-Sec and sat down with Kara.

"Are you hungry?" She asked the girl, who simply nodded. "Garrus, can you get us something to eat? Something nice?" Her bondmate nodded, knowing that Kara still wasn't comfortable with anyone but Shepard, and left. Shepard smiled before turning to Kara.

"How old are you?" Shepard asked, still unsure.

"Ten and a half." The girl replied, bringing her knees up to her chest in a gesture so familiar to Shepard that she almost laughed.

"Bailey, the C-Sec officer I was talking to, is a friend and I trust him. He'll find somewhere for you to stay, I promise." The girl nodded in response. "And I'll come and check on you whenever you want me to." Shepard said, smiling at the girl. She liked the kid and she didn't want anything to happen to her.

"Thank you." The girl said, so quietly that Shepard almost didn't hear it, despite her enhanced hearing. That was when Garrus returned with what seemed like a whole vending machine worth of chocolate, sweets and snacks.

"I didn't know what she'd like so..." Kara's face lit up and she forgot her shyness towards Garrus as she looked hopefully at a chocolate bar and he handed it to her. She sat, excitedly eating the chocolate as Jane smiled at her, eating a pack of fruit gums.

Kara was much more animated after that and seemed friendly towards both Shepard and Garrus. They were about half way through the pile of sweets when Bailey returned to them. Kara once again fell silent and grabbed Shepard's arm but didn't hide.

"Okay, there's a woman that I know who owns a bakery on the other side of the ward. She's got an apartment upstairs and says that there's too much room for just her and she needs a helping hand in the bakery anyway. She was going to hire someone but she said she'd be more than happy to hire and look after our little friend here instead." Shepard nodded.

"Is the woman nice?" Shepard asked and Bailey nodded.

"Yeah, nice old woman. I've got to know her quite well since she moved here a week ago. She's sweet but she knows how to use a gun which may come in handy if those thugs decide to show up again. I'll keep tabs on her as well, though." Shepard nodded at that before turning to Kara.

"Does that sound okay?" Kara bit her lip for a moment before nodding. "Okay, do you think you'd be okay to go with Bailey now? I promise I'll check in on you tomorrow." Kara smiled when Shepard promised to check up on her and nodded again.

"Alright, come on then." Bailey said to the girl and she hesitated for a moment but she nodded again and let go of Shepard's arm to follow Bailey leaving Garrus and Shepard alone.

"Do you ever think about when we first met?" She asked him, picking at her sweets.

"I guess. Mostly just about how improbable it was that we met again. You?" She looked away, allowing herself to become lost in the memories.

"I often wondered, in the early days of Biotic Training, about that girl. The one I saved? I didn't even know her name..."

"Laura. Her name was Laura." Jane looked at him, a little confused. "After I left you at the clinic I went back to C-Sec and asked my dad about her. Her parents came to pick her up and wanted to thank the officer who had rescued her but there wasn't anyone there to thank and you'd only told me your first name. I remember wishing that I'd asked for your full name so that I could contact you and tell you that there was a family who wanted to thank you." Shepard smiled a little sheepishly at that.

"Is it bad that I'm glad that you didn't? I mean, I wanted to know that the girl was alright but I don't think I could have handled face-to-face 'thank you's from her and her family." He smiled at that. She'd always been bad at accepting thanks.

"You were good with Kara." Shepard shrugged at that.

"You know, I never got on with other kids when I was a their age but now I'm grown up I get on quite well with them. Well, except for the bratty ones. I mean, what is wrong with their parents that they just let them act like that?" She shook her head, still smiling.

"Do you ever think about that? Having kids, I mean?" He asked uncertainly, and a little fearful. She shrugged, holding his hand in hers.

"I used to. Back before Mindoir, when I had a plan for my future. I used to love taking care of James and Bella for my aunt. I guess I never really thought about it after they..." Garrus squeezed her hand, wondering at how she could so casually discuss her own death but the deaths of these two children seemed to affect her more than anything. "Anyway, I guess I never really thought about it since then but yeah, I guess I want kids. What about you?" Garrus shrugged.

"The same, I guess. I never really thought about it too much but I always figured it would happen. But it's probably not possible..." He said and she took a deep breath.

"Maybe. But this is me you're talking to. I don't believe in impossible. Plus, even if it is, look at what happened today. There are plenty of kids who need homes so, I guess the whole incompatible biology thing doesn't bother me. Does it bother you?" He shook his head.

"No, ani. Not as long as I have you." She smiled at that as he lowered his forehead to hers.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

Shepard had to admit it. She had a terrible sense of direction. They had been wandering around Zakera Ward for twenty minutes trying to find the address that Bailey had given her for the bakery where Kara was now staying. Eventually she swallowed her pride and told Garrus that she had no idea where she was going.

"I was wondering how long you'd keep pretending." He said, smiling a little. She hit him lightly, smiling herself.

"Baka. Okay, if you're so knowledgeable, you tell me where it is." He sighed at that, shaking his head.

"It's just around this corner, ani." She narrowed her eyes at him as he lead her into a cute looking bakery/café that seemed a little too familiar. She glanced around as almost gasped as her eyes fell on the older woman standing behind the counter chatting to Kara.

"Gran?" Shepard asked as she approached them.

"Ah, Jane. Kara told me that you'd be stopping by this morning." She said and Shepard shook her head in disbelief.

"I thought you were just scouting locations?" She asked and her grandmother smiled at her.

"I was but when I saw this place I knew that it was it and with Rebecca helping to run the old bakery on Earth with her mother, I thought it would be wise to set up another shop. So, what do you think?" Jane grinned at that.

"Gran, it's brilliant. I imagine there's a lot of demand for a specialist bakery on the Citadel." Her grandmother nodded at that.

"Indeed. Did you know that asari-vorcha children are allergic to dairy? There's one who lives just down the road and she loves my cheesecake. But I think you're being a bit rude, petal. You haven't introduced me to your friend." Shepard blinked as she remembered that Garrus was stood beside her and she felt his amusement as she quickly tried to figure out how to introduce him.

"That's Garrus. He got me chocolate yesterday." Kara said, grinning. Shepard laughed at that.

"Yes, that seems to Garrus' only job on my ship; to bring me sweets." She joked and he shook his head.

"Really? I thought it was to make sure you don't get yourself killed." He quipped back and she hit him lightly.

"Are you saying that I couldn't do this without you, baka?" He laughed at that.

"Of course you could, ani. Just not as stylishly, of course." She grinned, shaking her head, as she turned her attention back to her gran and Kara.

"So, how are you settling in, little one?" She asked Kara who beamed back at her.

"Elle is brilliant! Those guys came looking for me this morning and she scared them away just like you did! Plus, she let me help her bake a chocolate cake last night." Kara's eyes lit up with excitement and Jane grinned, glad at how things had turned out.

"How about you go and get a piece for everyone? Except get a piece from the cake with the purple label for Garrus." Her gran said to kara who nodded, excitedly.

"So, how is she?" Shepard asked once Kara was out of ear-shot.

"She's fine, petal. Children adapt quickly and she reminds me of you when you were little. She's been a great help and she's just as good as you at baking. Although, she's just as shy as you were with the customers and, as I told you, shy bairns get nowt." Garrus frowned at that but Jane translated it in her head for him as 'shy children get nothing'.

"Hey, I've got plenty." Jane joked but her gran just smiled.

"I know, petal. I'll go and help Kara carry the cake through." She left to go into the back room and Garus turned to Jane, smiling.

"I like your Gran." She smiled back.

"Everyone does. And she is right, what if I'd been too shy to say anything to you about how I felt about you?" She asked as he stepped closer to her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"As I recall, you didn't _say_ anything so much as you tackled me to the ground and started kissing me." He joked and she raised an eyebrow.

"I don't remember you objecting." She pointed out and he laughed a little.

"Of course not, ani. I was about five seconds from kissing you myself... or, you know, something less subtle." He murmured causing her to blush as she heard someone clear their throat behind them. They turned around to see her Gran and Kara holding two pieces of cake each and both wearing massive grins.

"I didn't know he was your _boyfriend_." Kara said, her eyes wide, causing her Gran to smile.

"I believe the term is _bondmate_." Her Gran corrected as Jane blushed and Garrus shifted a little guiltily.

"How d'you know that?" Jane asked but her Gran just smiled, a twinkle in her eye.

"Jane, for the past fifty years I have run a specialist bakery in one of the biggest cities on Earth and ever since we discovered other races my client list has grown massively. Remember how many turians you used to see in my bakery when you were young?" Jane smiled as she remembered that, despite the fact that she lived on a ship, the most contact she had with alien races tended to be when she took shoreleave with her dad down to her Gran's bakery in Edinburgh and she would help out behind the counter for some pocket money.

"Yeah. Remember when I first saw a krogan? Or a quarian? I think I almost bounced off of the walls with excitement when she answered my questions about her suit." She laughed at the memory, conveying it to Garrus through their bond. Her Gran smiled at them both as Garrus kept his arm around Jane's waist.

"I think that was the first time I had seen you ask someone a question since you were very little." Her Gran said and Jane laughed a little.

"Yeah, I'm quite good with quarians. I think it's the masks." She said, shrugging a little.

"So, how long are you staying on the Citadel? Until your parents arrive next week?" Her Gran asked and Jane frowned at her.

"Mum and dad are coming?" She asked and her Gran noddded.

"Yes, they sent me a message about an hour ago." Jane checked her omni-tool and realised that she, too, had a message from her mother.

"Well, yeah, I guess. Garrus' family is here too so it shouldn't be a problem. Although, if you talk to them before they arrive can you not mention that Garrus and I are together? I haven't had a chance to tell them myself and I don't want them hearing second hand so don't bring it up unless they tell you specifically that they already know, okay?" Jane gave her Gran a warning look, knowing that while she was always quick to defend her granddaughter to Hannah Shepard, it often resulted in her mother being told things that she wasn't supposed to know. Her Gran held up her hands in surrender.

"I promise I won't tell them anything until you tell me that it's alright." She assured her and Jane smiled at her.

"Thanks Gran."

* * *

Garrus returned to the Normandy that night after visiting his family again. Shepard hadn't come with him this time, Kelly had messaged her just after they'd gone for dinner to tell her that she was getting a call from the Alliance. He hadn't really given it much thought and she had returned to the ship to deal with it.

Garrus marvelled at the design on the side of the Normandy as he boarded, it was a symbol of their new life and their hopes for the future. The thought made him think of the only possession that he didn't keep in the quarters he shared with Shepard, the little box that remained hidden away in the Main Battery. He shook his head. Now wasn't the right time, but soon.

He nodded to each of the crew members he passed as he headed towards the elevator, happy that they all returned the gesture, smiling at him. He figured that Jane had never been more right than when she called them all her family.

When he entered their quarters he found Jane sitting on the edge of their bed, her nose in her omni-tool. She looked up when he entered and gave him an apologetic smile.

"Hackett called and asked for a favour." Garrus gave her the turian equivalent of a raised eyebrow.

"Does he ever call for anything else?" Shepard smiled, shaking her head.

"It's urgent so I have to go now but there's a catch. I'll be going alone." Garrus shook his head at that.

"No way, ani." She just gave him a look, sighing.

"You know Garrus, I am a graduate of the N7 program and I was handpicked to become the first human Spectre. I don't think it's just bravado when I say that I can handle myself." She reasoned but he folded his arms.

"I know that Jane. It's just... It's difficult to not be beside you when you're putting yourself in danger." She nodded at that.

"The Normandy will be in the system, ready to pick me up if something goes wrong. I was going to suggest that you stay on the Citadel and spend time with your family so that you don't go crazy waiting for me but I get the sense that you're not going to agree to that." He shook his head.

"No, ani. If I can't be by your side then I'll wait for you here. Are you sure you have to go alone?" He asked and she nodded.

"It's a stealth mission. I'm going to have to be in and out without anyone seeing me." Garrus sighed at that, sitting next to her.

"At least it's something you're really good at." He reasoned and she smiled.

"I'm pretty sure that's why Hackett called me. Did I ever tell you about my days in basic?" He shook his head and she smiled remembering.

"I basically washed out of Biotic Training." She admitted and he looked at her, confused.

"You? How?" She smiled at that.

"No matter how hard I tried, I could never generate a strong enough biotic field. They put me back in basic with everyone else and I stayed in the shadows. No one paid any attention to me, to the point at which none of my instructors had chosen an assignment for me. My testing was off the charts in most cases but no one noticed. No one except Hackett. He was visiting the training facility at the time and he saw me taking this command test that was notorious for being impossible to pass the first time around. Especially not with a full crew at the end. But I passed it without a single casualty on my first try. After that he transferred me to Anderson's command and told him to keep an eye on me and give me a chance." Garrus realised that by putting his faith in her, Hackett had earned her respect and he knew from first-hand experience that Jane Shepard's respect was something worth having.

"So, when did your biotics return?" He asked, wondering how she'd gone from insanely powerful to unable to produce a stable field, to extremely powerful again.

"Anderson did as Hackett said and he gave me a chance. More than a chance, he let me go planetside as part of his ground team mere weeks after I'd finished basic. We went down to the planet and we found... it was a batarian slave camp. You have to understand that this was just two years after Mindoir and... I guess I never told you about how I heard about Mindoir either, huh?" He shook his head and she continues on, her voice hollow.

"Mom was stationed on the Einstein at the time and we were in the system. Sarah had vidcalled me the night before to talk to me about her boyfriend. She was a few weeks away from her sixteen and they were getting serious. I don't know why the hell she called _me_ of all people but I guess she felt weird talking to her mom about it and we were as close as sisters. Anyway, the next day we responded to a distress call from the colony and... they wouldn't let me down on the planet but I could see it from my window. You could actually see the burning from orbit..." She trailed off, lost in thought before she returned to the present.

"So, two years later I'm on my first real mission and the batarians get the drop on us. So, we're surrounded and the only weapon I have is my pistol because I was dumb and straight out of basic, and then I locked eyes with this terrified girl, about sixteen with blonde hair and terrified blue eyes. Of course, I knew that it couldn't be Sarah because she would have been older and she didn't _really_ look like her but when I saw the terror in those eyes and I realised that's what Sarah would have looked like just before she... My biotics went haywire and I attacked the closest batarian, grabbing his shotgun. The entire camp was dead in minutes. Some of them, I didn't have to kill. Hell Garrus, after the first couple I reckon the rest would have just surrendered had I given them the chance but... I didn't." She shrugged, her voice still hollow as he pulled her close to him and she rested her head just beneath his neck.

"Was that why you were so determined to stop me from killing Sidonis?" She nodded.

"That wasn't me, Garrus. I protected those slaves but I didn't _have_ to kill them all to do it. Maybe none of them would have surrendered. Maybe they would have all fought to the death, but I can't know that. Nothing has ever haunted me quite like it." She admitted as he held her close.

"Like you said ani, it wasn't you. You were hurting from something that no one should ever have to go through and it affected your judgement. That's okay, it happens to everyone." She smiled weakly at that.

"I know Garrus but I'm not everyone. I'm not used to making decisions based on emotions, that's never been my way. Anyway, it was years ago now, I'm over it. I guess I just wanted you to know everything about me." She admitted, holding him close as the Normandy left the Citadel and headed into batarian space.

* * *

**AN: I just wanted to again say thank you to everyone reading this, especially those awesome people who have reviewed and followed and favourited this story, it's really nice to hear that you guys like this story and it means a lot to me. So, thanks again and I hope you have enjoyed so far!**


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

Garrus had exiled himself to the Main Battery when he had felt Shepard lose consciousness and hadn't left in the past three days. At that point he had wanted nothing more than to rush to his bondmate's side but, after quite a bit of shouting, Tali had convinced him that rushing to Shepard would do more harm than good on a covert mission when he didn't know what exactly was wrong. And Tali had been right, Shepard had returned to him in the early hours of the morning, according to ship time, but she headed straight to the med-bay to be looked over and before he had the chance to see her Hackett had come aboard to speak with her. After he had left Shepard had locked herself in the briefing room and told EDI to keep everyone else, including him, out.

So now he was trying to recalibrate the main gun, unable to focus as he could feel Jane's pain through their bond and it didn't take a genius to figure out what had caused it. He was so absorbed in trying to correct his mistakes that he didn't hear the door open.

"Hey." Came a quiet voice from behind him, causing him to jump a little in surprise. He turned to face Jane and couldn't help but worry as her eyes seemed hollow and lifeless, her hair barely staying within her bobble as strands were scattered across her face. Not that she seemed to notice.

He was about to ask what had happened when she relayed the memories to him, too tired to speak. She stopped remembering as she reached the part where the Normandy had picked her up. Garrus stood for a few moments, unsure of what to say.

"You know it's not your fault, right?" He said and she nodded, sitting down. She smiled weakly but it didn't reach her eyes.

"I know, Garrus. I've gone over it again and again in my head and there wasn't anything I could have done differently. There aren't many times in life you can actually say that and mean it but somehow it doesn't help. Logically, I don't blame myself but then there are the moments. Those points in time when the number becomes _real. _When it's no longer just a number but people. _Real_ people with jobs and kids and lives and... I know that it's not my fault and that they would have died anyway when the Reapers came but I hate the reminder that there are some things in this galaxy that I can't handle, no matter how good I am. I know that sounds like I'm full of myself but it's not what I mean... It's just easier if I can blame myself. If I know that I just needed to try harder or train more then I know that next time will be different. I can't do that this time." She finally looked at him and he saw the woman that everyone turned to when they needed help, who shouldered that responsibility without even thinking and who was often asked to do the impossible.

"You're worried about the Reapers." It wasn't a question, he could see where her thoughts were headed.

"I'm worried that no matter what I do, no matter how hard I try... I'm worried that it won't be enough." She admitted, taking off her glasses and rubbing her eyes.

"On your own? No, it probably won't be. But together? And I don't mean just the two of us, I mean everyone. You have an entire crew willing to stand by you, not to mention friends everywhere, including the Shadow Broker. Face it Jane, you're no longer a loner." Finally her weak smile reached her eyes, but it only lasted for a moment before they returned to their hollow state.

"It's not just that Garrus... The batarians are out for blood. My blood. If the Alliance takes the fall for this, it'll mean war. So that just leaves me..." Garrus growled as he saw where she was going.

"They can't do that to you!" She shook her head, standing up and wrapping her arms around him, pulling him close to her as he tensed with anger.

"Garrus, it's me or every human. Can you honestly say that you would make a different decision?" He wanted to say yes, to say that he would defend his innocence no matter what. But he couldn't.

"So, what happens now?" He asked and she sighed, pulling away from him and sitting down, bringing her knees up to her chest.

"Now I voluntarily hand myself into Alliance custody. There will be a trial at some point but it's all political bullshit so the chances are the Reapers will show up before anything actually happens." He sighed at that, shaking his head.

"You know, you can take the fall without handing yourself over. We could run with the Normandy." She smiled at that, raising an eyebrow.

"Then we would _really_ be like the A-Team. And I want to Garrus. I don't want to leave your side but if I become a fugitive then it would discredit everything I've ever said about the Reapers. So few people believe us that we can't risk losing the ones that do. I need to be sure that Earth prepares for the Reapers." Garrus shook his head, knowing that she was doing the right thing in a difficult situation but still feeling dread at the idea of her being torn from his side.

"So, what's going to happen?" He asked as she stood up, a little restless, and leant over the terminal, sighing.

"I've spent all of my time since Hackett left in negotiations. Luckily Anderson was the one relaying their... requests. I need to return to Earth immediately and they wanted me to hand the Normandy over as a sign of good faith." She laughed humourlessly at that last part and he put his arm around her. The Normandy was the only thing that she had and it was their home. He understood why the idea of handing it over to the Alliance made her insides clench.

"So what happened?" He asked and she sighed again.

"They said it would show good faith, I pointed out that the Normandy is private property and home to the whole crew and then they made the point that I was being arrested and the Normandy is a Cerberus-built ship based on classified Alliance designs and so they have the right to confiscate it. I then pulled out the Spectre card and told them that I was within my rights as a Spectre to take the Normandy from Cerberus and I reminded them that I was going willingly even though I didn't have to. Eventually we reached a compromise. Did Jacob ever tell you about when he served with the Alliance military?" He shook his head, he'd heard a little but not much. "He was a Corsair. They were Alliance Marines who operated on independent starships. It allowed the Alliance to disavow them if things went wrong which it often does for us. It allowed me to make a pretty convincing argument to let the Normandy remain registered to me. The problem with them allowing me to keep the Normandy is that a) they want it and b) it sends a message to the batarians that I'll eventually walk free. So, the Normandy will be docked on Earth with me and their engineers will bring it up to Alliance spec but it will still belong to me. Once the mess with the batarians is sorted or, you know, the Reapers show up, I'll be given back the Normandy to use for my Spectre assignments but also for operations on behalf of the Alliance. They'd even be willing to give me some crew members. And once I quit or retired the Normandy would remain in my possession. It took a lot of arm-twisting but they finally agreed. I just... it's my home, Garrus. It's _our_ home. And it's not just that, I mean, what would happen to EDI if some other Alliance officer commanded this ship? So, that's what I've been negotiating all day. That and the exact details of handing myself over." She shook her head, not wanting to think about how little time she had left.

"How long?" He asked hollowly and she sighed.

"They've allowed me just enough time to drop everyone off at the Citadel before I head back to Alliance space to rendezvous with one of their ships and hand myself and the Normandy over. We'll arrive at the Citadel tomorrow morning. I've already told everyone else and helped them to iron out plans to help people prepare for the Reapers while I'm locked up. Liara's going to keep track of them all for me and, if it's okay with you, relay the information to you. Not that you have to do anything but just... keep an eye on them all for me? Please?" He shook his head, disbelieving. She was about to be locked up, for doing nothing more than carrying out her orders, for an undetermined amount of time and she was worried about the rest of the crew.

"Of course I will, ani. I'm more worried about you." She took a deep breath and nodded.

"I know, Garrus. But, I'll be okay. Anderson's going to head back to Earth with me to make sure everything's okay and to help with preparations for the Reapers so I won't be completely alone." She reasoned but the pain of what was to come was clearly evident in her voice.

"I'm guessing the Alliance won't let your turian bondmate come with you?" She shook her head.

"No, but I think that's for the best. As much as I want nothing more than to be with you, you need to be with your family right now, Garrus. Plus, between Liara and the crew we have every base covered; Samara will prepare the asari through the other justicars, Thane will spread the message through his contacts across the galaxy including the Drell and Hanar, Miranda will deal with the Cerberus bases that she knows of and will try to figure out what the Illusive Man is up to, Mordin will go back to the STG and prepare the Salarians, Grunt will go back to Tuchanka to train and help Wrex to prepare the Krogan, Zaeed will still go after revenge but along the way he'll spread the word through his merc contacts, Kasumi will go into hiding but she'll get in touch with as many of her underworld contacts that she can, Jack will go off and do her own thing again but I have a feeling that, whatever it is, it'll mean trouble for Cerberus, Legion will go back to the geth and prepare them, Tali will return to the Migrant Fleet and make sure they're ready and Jacob doesn't really have a plan yet but he's promised to get in contact with a lot of old friends to get them to prepare. So, that pretty much covers the entire galaxy except-"

"Except the turians." He finished for her and she nodded.

"Yeah. Think they'll listen to you?" He sighed, leaning against the wall as he thought about it.

"I don't know. Maybe. I've got to try at least." She nodded. She knew the feeling.

"I put you as my next of kin on the paperwork. Hackett and Anderson know to contact my mom and dad but no one knows to tell you if anything happens." She reasoned.

"I guess we never did finish telling our families, huh?" She shook her head.

"Well, your dad doesn't even arrive on the Citadel until tomorrow afternoon and my parents won't show until the day after so I'm going to miss them completely." She sighed. God forbid anything should go as planned.

"I'm guessing the paperwork didn't have a checkbox for bondmate, huh?" She shook her head.

"In the Alliance's defence, they do have a box for 'other'. I guess that pretty much describes us, huh? 'Other'." She smiled weakly and he smiled back.

"'Other' is a pretty good description but I might have a better one." He reached behind his cot that hadn't been used in months and pulled out a flat, square jewellery box, handing it to her. "I know you're not really a jewellery person but I also know that it's human custom to get a ring so I compromised..." He said as she opened the box and found a simple gold ring on a chain.

The inside of the ring lit up blue and when she ran her finger along the edge blue light projected from several points, converging on the centre and projecting a holo-recording upwards. In the recording she and Garrus were standing side-by-side, a little dishevelled and in their armour but grinning at each other as they laughed and joked, eventually holo-Garrus pulled holo-Jane in for a kiss and she raised her middle finger, presumably to a catcalling crew. She recognised the recording as one Tali had taken just after the Collector Base in order to remember their victory.

She touched it again and the recording changed to one that had been taken a few minutes later when Shepard had caught Tali recording and had insisted that they get a recording of the entire crew. They were all tired and a little shell-shocked but they smiled as they rode the high of accomplishing the impossible.

Touching it again brought up a holo-recording Garrus had taken of her, her Gran and Kara all laughing and smiling a few days earlier.

The final holo-recording was an old one that had been on her original holo-locket of Jane, her parents, her Aunt Riley, Sarah, James and Bella. It had been taken not long before Mindoir was attacked and it captured them all perfectly as James and Bella fought with each other silently as their mother tried to get Sarah to pay attention instead of messaging her friends. After a few seconds holo-Jane grabbed Bella around the middle and hoisted her onto her lap and gave James a look, shaking her head and smiling as her mom smiled at her and her dad put his arm on her shoulder.

Jane smiled and, for the first time since she left the Normandy to find Kenson, it reached her eyes and stayed there as a tear fell down her cheek. She raised an eyebrow at Garrus about the last holo-recording and he shrugged.

"You should probably change your omni-tool password once in a while." He explained and she laughed a little.

"What did I ever do to deserve you?" She asked, at a loss to explain how the unlikely series of events that was her life had ended up at the point where, despite being put in an impossible situation that meant her incarceration, she felt like the luckiest person alive.

"Funny, I ask myself that pretty much constantly." He replied and her smile widened.

"Me too." He lowered his forehead to hers and her fingers traced their way up his neck, finding a specific point. "Turian customs don't involve rings, though." She pointed out.

"No. Bondmates are pretty much _it_ in turian culture but they usually have the bondmarks." He explained but she already knew that, evident by the fact that she had found the point on his neck where bondmarks would be placed.

"It doesn't seem fair to just use human customs." She reasoned and he shook his head slightly.

"I guess not. Although you don't have talons and your skin hasn't scarred since you upgraded your implants." She smiled a little.

"I can improvise and the upgrades can be turned off for long enough for it to scar up. I'm yours for as long as you'll have me, ani." His heart leapt when she used the word for bondmate.

"Same, ani."

* * *

Shepard stood at the Normandy's airlock, ready to say goodbye to everyone as they want.

"Keelah, Jane. I hate saying goodbye." Tali said, hugging her friend.

"It's not really goodbye, Tali. I'll see you again once this has all been sorted out. I promise." Tali nodded and Jane recognised that she was smiling.

"I'm going to hold you to that." She said, giving Jane one last hug before disembarking. At that point Legion appeared.

"Shepard-Commander, we wish to thank you. Not many organics would trust the geth and even fewer would agree to help us. You have shown that we are not that different after all." Jane smiled at that.

"Thank you, Legion. I'm glad to have met you and to be able to call you a friend." She said, still smiling as Legion nodded his head as joined Tali. Grunt then approached her.

"Battlemaster, it has been an honour serving with you and if you would let me I would crush every single one of those idiots trying to lock you up." Shepard shook her head, grinning.

"You can't solve every problem with violence Grunt, but things would be a hell of a lot easier if you could. Take care of yourself, okay?" He laughed at that but nodded.

"Of course, Battlemaster." With that he left the ship and in his place Jacob appeared.

"Shepard. It's been a hell of a ride, huh?" She nodded.

"You can say that again. Thanks for sticking with me through it, even after I told the boss to shove it." Jacob nodded at that.

"It's been an honour, Shepard."

"Same here." He nodded again before disembarking and allowing Miranda to take his place.

"I just wanted to say thank you, Shepard. I know I'm not the easiest person to get along with but you still went out of your way to help me and to make me feel included as part of the crew." Shepard smiled at that.

"Hell Miranda, I'm sure I made your job an absolute pain when you were still reporting to the Illusive Man." Miranda nodded a little, smiling.

"But if it wasn't for you I'd still be reporting to him. I owe you, Shepard." She said before moving towards Jacob. That's when Kasumi appeared out of thin air in front of Shepard.

"Well Shep, it's been fun. We should really do this again. Maybe minus the Collectors and dead Reapers, though." Shepard grinned at that.

"But where's the fun in that?" Kasumi grinned back.

"Shepard, your skill at deceiving everyone into believing that you're harmless is almost as good as mine. And I don't often say that." Kasumi joked with enough sincerity to show that she meant every word.

"I'll take it as the highest compliment." Shepard joked back, also sincere.

"Well, see you around I guess. Or not, never can tell." Kasumi said as she disappeared again.

"Same." Shepard said to the air in front of her as Zaeed appeared.

"You're goddamn crazy kid, but a hell of a fighter. You ever need a favour, just call." Shepard smiled and nodded at that.

"Back at you. I'm gonna miss having you around, old man." She said and he nodded.

"Same, kid. Don't get yourself blown up." He said, moving off.

"I'll try but no promises." She yelled back at him as he walked away and Samara approached her.

"Shepard, it has been an honour." Shepard nodded at her.

"The honour has been all mine, Samara." Samara nodded back.

"I wish you luck."

"You too." And, with that, Samara took off and Thane took her place.

"Shepard. I wished to thank you for helping me with my son and... for being my friend." She smiled at that, feeling a little awkward.

"Thane, I am the queen of solitude, I know all about not having any friends. So, believe me, when I say that it's no problem. And thank you, for being _my_ friend." He nodded, moving to join Samara as Jack approached.

"Fuck, Shepard. I hate this shit." She frowned and Shepard shrugged.

"I'm not big on it either. Goodbyes suck." Jack nodded.

"Yeah. Never really cared enough to say goodbye before. So, see ya." She said, shrugging.

"Yeah, see ya." Shepard replied as Jack left and Mordin took her place.

"Shepard. Good working with you. Been an honour." Shepard nodded.

"Same here, Mordin. I'm going to miss having someone intelligent to talk to." Mordin smiled, handing her a small bottle of blue liquid.

"Apply to bondmark. Should scar and allow you to re-activate implants." Shepard grinned, shaking her head.

"When did you make this up?" She asked and he shrugged.

"Just after Horizon. Expected him to mark you earlier. Turians territorial." She smiled at that.

"Yeah but he's also nervous and awkward. I guess it's why I love him so much." She said, shrugging.

"And here was me thinking it was my ruggedly handsome good looks." Garrus said as he appeared behind her, his arm over her shoulder.

"Well, there is that, too." Jane said, shrugging.

"Have more ideas for cybernetics but require more time. Hope to see you again to apply them." Shepard grinned and Garrus shook his head.

"I look forward to it, Mordin. See you." Mordin nodded and moved away, leaving Garrus and Jane alone.

"I guess this is goodbye, huh?" She said, smiling but he could see tears begin to form in her eyes.

"Yeah, I guess it is." He murmured, running his hand through her hair as his eyes locked with hers.

"Dammit Garrus, I'm going to miss you so much." She sighed as he lowered his forehead to hers.

"I'm going to miss you too, ani. I love you." He murmured and she bit her lip to stop the tears from escaping her eyes.

"I love you too, ani... I guess you have to go." She sighed, not pulling away from him.

"Yeah." He agreed, also not pulling away. They stood like that for several minutes before she laughed a little.

"I really don't want you to go but..." She said and he sighed.

"I know..." He pulled away and she felt her heart go with him.


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

Shepard was greeted outside the Normandy's airlock by two guards and Anderson. She sighed at the guards but otherwise just stood, waiting for orders.

"Shepard." Anderson said, his voice heavy. Shepard's mouth twitched a little as she realised that he didn't like this any more than she did.

"Anderson." She said, neutrally. She had her hands clasped behind her back in an attempt to stop her from fiddling, not with her hair, but with her holo-locket which was tucked beneath her top. She had opted for a white vest top with her dark blue jeans and white trainers, not wanting to intimidate with the casual clothes she normally wore on board the ship.

One of the guards moved forward and began to scan her with his omni-tool. He stopped over her chest and turned to Anderson, looking a little alarmed. She rolled her eyes at that, pulling the holo-locket from beneath her vest.

"It's a locket. It shows me pictures." She said, a little tersely. She had only been separated from Garrus for little over a day and it was already taking it's toll on her temper. She figured it was a combination of the distance and the knowledge that she wouldn't see him again soon. The tugging feeling in her chest was never far from the forefront of her mind.

"Sir, it could be a concealed weapon and even if it isn't I would suggest that given Shepard's tech expertise, it be taken from her anyway." Anderson gave her a look that suggested that if she could, she should just hand it over. Shepard just raised her eyebrow.

"I'm not sure whether I should be flattered or annoyed." She smirked, coldly. Anderson looked concerned, he hadn't known Shepard to be so... confrontational. "If you want to take this, you'll have to kill me." Her expression was dead serious and Anderson nodded.

"I don't think even Shepard could construct a weapon from a holo-locket." Anderson said and the guard stood down, although he looked as if he didn't agree with Anderson. "This way, Shepard." She followed Anderson and found, to her surprise, that, they were headed to the VIP quarters. Although, as soon as they entered, the door locked behind them.

"I was expecting the brig." Shepard admitted and Anderson smiled, sitting at the desk as Shepard perched on the end of the bed. She noticed that all of the tech had been removed from the room including the terminal and couldn't help but smile. She hadn't realised that her reputation was so great.

"Shepard, most don't agree with how this is being handled. We recognise the need to pacify the batarians but... Dammit Shepard, you're a god damn hero in most of our books." She blushed a little, going to push her glasses up her nose before remembering that she had handed them over at the airlock. She settled for fiddling with the holo-locket, careful not to activate it.

"Thank you, Anderson. That means a lot." He nodded before continuing, watching her closely as she twisted the locket's chain over and over.

"Are you going to be alright, Shepard?" He asked, leaning forward and looking at her intently. Shepard sighed at that, still twisting the locket.

"Yeah." She managed, swallowing hard. Trying not to think too much about what she had left behind.

"Really? Because you're about to snap that locket off of its chain. The locket that you said you would protect with your life and that looks suspiciously like a-"

"Yeah, okay. Maybe it's not going to be easy for me to leave everyone behind. I'm not used to having... so many friends." She said, not meeting his eyes.

"So, who is he?" She looked at him questioningly, pain in her eye.

"Shepard, I'm not blind. You're fidgeting incessantly with a wedding ring." He pointed out and she sighed.

"I know, I just... haven't really told anyone yet. So, if I tell you then you can't tell anyone. Especially not my parents. I don't need them hearing this second-hand." Anderson looked at her and sighed. He'd always watched out for Shepard, ever since the mission to the batarian slave camp. He had trusted Hackett's judgement and given the quiet, young girl a chance despite the fact that she hardly looked like anything. But looks can be deceiving as he found out and, while she never seemed entirely comfortable with other people and kept to herself so well most of the crew wouldn't even recognise her, she was one of the deadliest soldiers he had ever seen. Putting her in for special ops training had just made sense to him and she had excelled, determined to prove that his faith in her wasn't misplaced. Now, it seemed that she needed someone to talk to and he knew that she would trust no one else.

"You don't have to tell me Shepard but if you want to then I'm here." She took a deep breath and nodded.

"I need a dry-run anyway before I tell my parents." She said and he nodded.

"So, who is it? On your paperwork you didn't state a husband, just your parents and Vakarian under 'other'." She nodded.

"Yeah, well, we're not technically married. Not under human laws, anyway..." She bit her lip, trying to decide how to approach it.

"So he's not human?" She shook her head and Anderson gave her a look. She tried to determine whether it was a good or bad one but couldn't.

"Yeah, so you can imagine why I want to be the ones to tell my parents." She joked a little before sighing. "So, we are the equivalent of married but I didn't want to put 'husband' on the forms because he had never technically asked me, or at least he hadn't until just before I came here. So, I guess he's my fiancée. That feels so weird saying the word..." She trailed off and Anderson narrowed his eyes as the pieces fell into place.

"It's _Vakarian_?" He asked and she bit her lip, nodding. "I had assumed that you had put him on the form because you said, in the report that you after cutting ties with Cerberus, that he was essentially your XO." Shepard shrugged at that.

"Well no, Miranda was still in charge of all of the XO stuff. It was just that I would never enter a battle without him on my six, you know?" Anderson sighed at that, shaking his head.

"Yeah Shepard, I know. Figures, you two are too alike for your own good. Both trouble makers, you're just smarter about it." He said, smiling and she smiled back. They both knew that her report was only clean because she was very good at finding loopholes and covering her tracks when she bent regulations. "So, You really love him, huh?" She nodded.

"I really do. Anderson, I can live with being locked up. I've lived on ships my whole life, I'm used to small spaces and solitude. But being away from Garrus for an undetermined amount of time? It's gonna be tough." Anderson just nodded. There was nothing he could say, no platitudes to make this better. She was going to hurt and it was only going to get worse.

* * *

"Garrus! It's not true, is it? I told them it wasn't but they wouldn't listen!" Kara cried out as soon as he entered the bakery, startling the few customers and causing Elle to shake her head at her. Garrus sighed a little, how was he going to explain the extenuating circumstances to a ten year old?

"Kara, it wasn't her fault. There was nothing she could do to stop it." He said and the girl nodded.

"There was no way out..." It wasn't a question but he shook his head anyway. He had forgotten that Kara had spent the last year or so on the streets of the Citadel and had probably learnt the hard way about making the tough calls. She was probably more grown up than anyone ever gave her credit for. Anyone except Jane.

"How are you holding up, petal?" Elle asked and he shook his head.

"It's hard not being near her." He admitted, his hand moving reflexively to his bondmark. Elle watched him carefully as she drank a cup of tea.

"I was wondering how long it would take you two to mark each other." She commented and he shrugged.

"I guess we were just trying to find a balance between turian and human customs. I figured she might not be so keen on me slicing up her neck to give her a scar." Elle smiled at that.

"You figured wrong, I take it?" He nodded, smiling himself. Right up until he heard a voice from behind him.

"Garrus! I've been looking everywhere for you." His sister approached him, shaking her head. He sighed at that.

"Sol, this is Elle and Kara. Elle, Kara, this is my sister Solana." He introduced them all and they nodded to each other, and although Sol smiled it wasn't warm as she kept her eyes on her brother. She seemed a little annoyed but mostly just tired.

"Garrus, please don't just wander off without telling me where you're going. Dad asked where you were. It seems like you're avoiding him." Garrus sighed, shaking his head.

"Sol, you should have just messaged me instead of coming to find me. You should be with Mom." Sol rolled her eyes at that.

"So should you, Garrus. She's fine, Dad's with her. Which is why you're not, I assume. You _are_ avoiding him. Why?" Garrus sighed and Kara spoke up, still listening in to their conversation.

"He doesn't want to get told off for going out with a human. It's_ weird_." Kara explained and Sol looked at her, surprised. Garrus just shrugged.

"Sol, Dad's going through a lot right now and finding out about Jane and I isn't going to make it easier for him. Mom's always been more tolerant of my reckless behaviour and hot-headed nature than Dad has so I knew that it wouldn't be an issue with her but Dad? He's never exactly been a fan of humans or of my life decisions which I get, I really do, but right now it's a problem that we don't need." Sol shrugged.

"So then don't tell him." She said simply and he sighed.

"Sol, you figured it out after five minutes with Jane and I. Mom figured it out before _I_ did from a letter I sent home years ago. So, how long do you think it will take Dad, the famed C-Sec investigator, to figure it out?" Sol sighed, shaking her head. Her brother really could be an idiot sometimes.

"Garrus, you're barely present when I try to talk to you. If you can barely concentrate, imagine what it's like for Dad. He only noticed that you were absent because it's so obvious. If you were actually there, even for a little while, I don't think he'd even notice your facial scars. But it would lower his suspicions. He's not going to see your bondmark because he won't be looking for it. He's too... distracted." Garrus nodded, sighing. She was right, of course.

"Yeah, I'll go back to the hospital in a bit. I promised Jane I'd keep an eye on Kara for her." He said, gesturing to the young girl who was now across the room, drinking a hot chocolate. Sol gave him a sympathetic smile.

"I'm sorry about what happened, Garrus. I know this must be hard for you." He nodded.

"Yeah but you guys need me right now and Jane needs me to keep an eye on everything for her and Palaven needs to be prepared for the Reapers so I can't afford to dwell on it too much." Sol nodded in understanding, putting her hand on his arm.

"You should try asking Dad about the Reaper problem Garrus, he might surprise you." He nodded.

"Yeah, maybe."

* * *

Shepard's cell was surprisingly comfortable. She hadn't expected it to be a horrific dungeon but she also hadn't expected a space that largely resembled her old quarters on the SR1. Large enough to be considered comfortable without the emptiness of her quarters on the SR2. Or, at least, the emptiness that she had experienced those nights before she had told Garrus how she felt, the nights when she had been alone with the memories of being spaced and the visions from the beacon on Eden Prime. She never used to dream. Maybe once or twice a year, when she was particularly stressed, but not often. Certainly not nightmares every night. Somehow Garrus' presence returned her to the days before, when she slept peacefully each night. Now, though, the dreams were back in full force, yet another reminder of her distance from Garrus.

The room, much like the quarters on the ship that had brought her to Earth, had been stripped of all tech. She frowned a little, wondering when her reputation had started to precede her. Sure, she was well known as a close quarters combat expert and her biotic power was well known but her tech abilities had always been forgotten by others in the past. She wondered if the world had stopped underestimating her and, if they had, was it good or bad?

She was still musing when a huge hulk of muscle entered the office adjacent to her cell. The cell itself didn't have a door, although the small bathroom did, but she was separated from the office by a kinetic barrier which she could see and hear through, although not pass through. She turned her attention to the huge guy who could easily be mistaken for a krogan as she realised that he was her guard. She carefully watched him as he approached the barrier and gave her a salute.

"Commander." He said and she smiled.

"I don't think you're supposed to call me that any more." She pointed out and he shrugged.

"I'm not supposed to salute you, either." He reasoned and she kept smiling.

"So, what's your name?" She asked, folding her arms.

"James Vega. I'm your protection detail." She raised an eyebrow.

"You mean guard?" He shrugged.

"Yeah but they figured someone's more likely to try and assassinate you are to try to escape." She nodded at that.

"Fair enough. You seem alright Vega. I thought they'd probably stick me with some pendejo who didn't know the meaning of fun." Vega raised an eyebrow at the swear.

"Tú hablas español?" He asked and she nodded.

"Yeah, but I haven't had much practice lately." She answered in Spanish and he nodded.

"Sounds fine to me." He shrugged. "But I could help you practice if you want. Not much else to do here anyway." She nodded. Maybe keeping her language skills sharp would give her the distraction she needed, although she doubted it.

* * *

**AN: My apologies if I screwed up the Spanish. I was going to write more but then it hit me that since it has been a year since I've had occasion to speak any Spanish I'm a little rusty. Also, thank you everyone who has reviewed and followed and favourited, it means a lot to me that you guys like what I'm writing so thank you! Hope you enjoyed!**


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30**

"Stop pacing, Shepard. You're doing my head in." James sighed with frustration and Shepard copied him, climbing up onto the desk and sitting cross-legged so that she could see him clearly through the kinetic barrier. She was restless but she had no way to calm herself since she'd already pulled a muscle in her shoulder from exercising. It had been a month since she had been locked up and, as expected, there was little to no news about either her trial or the Reapers. Or anything else, for that matter. She wasn't allowed access to the extra-net in case someone tried to contact her. So, the only contact she had with the outside was through James and her bond with Garrus.

James was good about giving her information, even when he wasn't necessarily supposed to, but he couldn't tell her anything about her crew. Or Garrus. She was worried about him. It was dumb, given that she was the one locked up, but she could still feel him every now and then and last week she had felt a great sorrow across their bond and realised that his mother had passed on. At that point she had grown restless enough to try the meditation techniques Samara had taught her. It was strange, instead of blocking out the tugging feeling it had morphed it back into the more familiar connection that they had when they were close to each other. Not strong enough to send specific thoughts or memories, but enough to send emotions and she had sent her empathy and understanding and she had felt his sadness ease a little.

The problem was that she couldn't maintain it. It only lasted for a moment or two before it faded back to the tugging feeling and left her feeling even more alone.

So now she was worried about how Garrus was holding up and she couldn't talk to anyone about it because James was the only person she _had_ to talk to. She was keeping shut up about it, mostly because she knew that Commander Shepard being engaged to a turian would be exactly the kind of gossip that spread through the Alliance like wild fire. She figured once the secret was out it would only be a matter of time before her parents found out. So, she'd kept her locket under her shirt and only brought it out at night when no one was really watching her.

"Come on, James. I'm bored." She groaned and he sighed again.

"It's not my fault that you've already read every book in the library. I'd get you digital copies but you know you're not allowed tech in there." She sighed in frustration, still wondering why the hell they were being so strict about the tech. She wasn't going to build a weapon from a data-pad. Not that she couldn't, she just wasn't going to. And that's where the problem lay.

"Fine. Just... How did you get stuck on guard duty? That's gotta be a story." James shrugged at that.

"I punched a guy." She raised an eyebrow at that.

"Why?" He shrugged again.

"He said you were crazy." She frowned a little.

"I kind of am..." She reasoned but he shook his head.

"Yeah, but he meant delusional. Said you always had a few screws loose because of the Skyllian Sim." Shepard sighed. The Skyllian Simulation was the test that Hackett had seen her pass. The one that was known for being impossible.

"Yeah, the other marines, the ones who act as your crew in the sim? They all thought I was psycho. At least, at first." James frowned at that.

"They never tell you exactly how people pass so that you don't know what happens in the test but you're the only one to come out with a full crew the first time." She smiled a little at that, bringing her knees up to her chest.

"It's not a test." He gave her a look.

"What do you mean? Of course it's a test." Her smile widened.

"Nope. It's a lesson. I passed because I figured that out as well as what the lesson was." James folded his arms and narrowed his eyes.

"So, what's the lesson?" He asked and she raised an eyebrow.

"It's pretty obvious. They're teaching you to make the tough choices. In order to save the ship and crew, you have to send someone on a suicide mission into the engine room to restore power, despite the fact that as soon as they restore power they'll be cooked alive." He nodded.

"Yeah, I know. But then the crew member dies and you don't get a perfect score. You managed it somehow." She thought for a moment before answering.

"How long did it take you to make the call? Did you wait until you had exhausted all other options?" He nodded.

"Of course." He answered but she shook her head.

"The odds of the other options working were so slim and once I figured out that it was a lesson, not a test, I figured out that it was the only option that would work. I came to that conclusion five minutes into the simulation." He looked at her, a little shocked.

"It took me two hours." He told her and she nodded.

"And by that point you had lost about half of the crew to the attack because you still didn't have full power in the engines." He nodded. "Yeah, the entire crew gave me a look when I made the call. At that point very little had happened and there were no casualties. They looked at me like I wasn't even human. Like I was a robot. But they followed my orders and I managed to rework the ship's VI so that it would shut the power off as soon as it was restored so that the engineer wouldn't burn. It was tricky and if I had tried it any later it wouldn't have worked but by making the decision right away I was able to get a perfect score. Most of the crew all got over my initial decision once it worked but there were a couple who... well, they were less than impressed by how quick I was to sacrifice one of the crew. Hackett debriefed me afterwards and I told him that I figured out the test. That's when he assigned me to Anderson's crew." James shook his head, disbelieving.

"When they said you were loco, I didn't think they meant it in a 'crazy genius' kind of way..." She shrugged, smiling.

"What, you didn't figure it out from all the other stories I've told you?" He smiled at that and she clasped her hands together to stop them from reaching for her locket as the tugging feeling in her chest returned to the forefront of her mind. She could never distract herself from it for long, especially not when there was silence.

"Well, I guess I kind of did. You all out of stories now?" She sighed at that.

"Pretty much. You?" He nodded.

"Same." She sighed again, thinking a little.

"Could we watch a vid or something. You know, I can still see your terminal from here if you spin it around." He thought about it for a moment before shaking his head.

"I'll ask about it later but for now I don't want to get you into trouble. And by you, I mean me." She smiled a little, biting her lip and he sighed.

"I do have access to your omni-tool files, don't worry not the encrypted stuff, so I could stick on some of your music." Her eyes lit up at that.

"What took you so long to tell me?" He shrugged.

"All of the human music is really old crap. Not really my thing. But if it'll stop you pacing..." He tapped a few buttons and music filled the office and cell.

"_Don't you worry there my honey,_  
_We might not have any money,_  
_But we've got our love to pay the bills._

_Maybe I think you're cute and funny,_  
_Maybe I wanna do want bunnies do with you if you know what I mean._

_Oh lets get rich and buy our parents homes in the south of France,_  
_Lets get rich and give everybody nice sweaters and teach them how to dance,_  
_Lets get rich and build a house on a mountain making everybody look like ants,_  
_From way up there, you and I, you and I..._" Jane struggled to hold back tears as the music played, reminding her of all she had left behind.

James regarded her carefully as her expression grew distant and her hand moved towards the chain around her neck. Over the past month he'd gotten the feeling that she'd been omitting parts of her stories and that something was bothering her. Now, he realised, it was obvious that she had left someone behind and he wondered who it was...

* * *

Garrus sighed, looking out of the window of his old room. He couldn't help but wonder which star was Sol as Solana entered the room.

"It's good to be home." She said but he didn't respond. He hadn't thought of this as home in a long time. He always had, even when working at C-Sec his parent's house on Palaven felt more like home than his tiny apartment, but now it seemed empty and unfamiliar.

"Garrus, are you okay?" His sister asked and he just nodded. What else could he say? She sighed. Between him and her father she had her hands full. The two of them had finally started to get along when Garrus had asked their father for help with the Reaper problem. And now they were both throwing themselves into their work in order to distract themselves. Which would be great, if the two of them actually remembered to _eat_.

"Fine, be like that. You know, there's only so long you can get away with being all broody and miserable. Eventually you'll have to rejoin the world of the living." He turned from the window and finally turned to her, pain evident in his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Sol. I don't mean to make things difficult for you." His sub-harmonics were filled with apology and sorrow and she wanted to hit him or something, _anything_ to wipe the god-awful pathetic expression off of his face. Most of the time he hid his pain well, concentrating entirely on work, but then there were the times when he couldn't distract himself any more. It was driving her insane and she wondered if Shepard was as bad. If she were, she was shocked that the Alliance hadn't just decided that she wasn't worth the trouble of keeping locked up.

"Garrus, just _stop_. Okay? I get how difficult it is for you to be separated from her, I really do, but I'm worried about you. You don't eat, you barely sleep... Between you and Dad I wonder if there's any real plus side to having a bondmate." He shook his head at that, smiling a little as he remembered the moment when Jane had first kissed him and the whole universe seemed to stand still.

"No, Sol. I wouldn't trade what I have with her for anything... it's just difficult right now." She nodded, not entirely convinced.

"I know, Garrus. I just worry about you. Last time something happened to her, you headed to Omega and got half your face destroyed. I mean, it doesn't look as bad as I thought it would without the bandage but still... there is precedent for worry." He sighed at that and shook his head a little.

"Yeah but that was different Sol. I felt... empty. Now, I just have the overwhelming feeling that I'm not where I'm supposed to be. It's making me restless but you're right, I haven't slept in days so now I'm just tired. I'm sure I'll be cheerier once I've had some rest." She just gave him a look.

"Cheer? From you? What has that woman done to you..." She joked, shaking her head as she left him to his thoughts as across their bond he got the overwhelming feeling that Jane was missing him. He concentrated on sending her the fact that he missed her too, hoping his message would reach her.

It did and several star systems away, Jane Shepard smiled as the song ended.


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter 31**

"Is it that Alenko guy?" James asked and Shepard groaned, throwing him a death glare.

"James, if you don't stop trying to guess who my boyfriend is I will break out of this cell just so that I can beat you to death." She threatened and he smiled.

"That's not a no." He pointed out, grinning as she clenched her fists in frustration. It had been four months since she had been locked up. Four months of pure boredom and restlessness, punctuated by brief moments when her connection to Garrus was strong enough to ease her aching heart.

Although her heart wasn't the only part of her missing Garrus and that was just as difficult to deal with. The last few times she had meditated and managed to sense him across their bond she had found that his mind was in exactly the same place as hers, which didn't make it any easier to deal with.

So now her temper was the shortest that it had ever been and she was putting all of her effort into being civil, although it didn't often work. Luckily for her, James was good-natured enough to take it all in his stride as he continued to joke with her. He was like an annoying little brother who you wanted to hit but just couldn't bring yourself to.

"James, can we stop playing this game? I'm never going to tell you who it is so you might as well give up." He grinned at that.

"Yeah, but I got you to admit that there was someone." He said and she rolled her eyes.

"Come on. Can't we watch a vid? Episode 11 of season 3 should be up by now and I'm sure Lucy and Jictus are going to get together. They totally almost kissed last episode." James sighed at that, rolling his own eyes.

"I still can't believe you watch that crap. You know, I'm beginning to regret asking Anderson to let you watch vids." He said and she pulled a face.

"Look, if it'll get you to stop asking about my love life, I'll let you pick the vid." She reasoned but he just raised an eyebrow.

"Nah, guessing who your boyfriend is is way more fun. You sure it's not Alenko?" She groaned in response, placing her hands on her hips as another voice rang out from the other side of the office.

"Boyfriend? Well, seems as if we have more than a little catching up to do, Jane." Jane grinned as she recognised her mother's voice, until she realised that she now knew that she had a boyfriend. No escape now, she thought to herself as she mouthed 'thanks' to James with a sarcastic expression. He just grinned.

"Mom! I missed you. What are you doing here?" She said, smiling as her mother came into view. As much as she didn't want to have to explain the whole Garrus thing just yet, she was glad to see her. Suddenly her blood froze in her veins as she tried to mentally check that her holo-locket and bondmark were covered. She didn't have to worry about anyone else noticing the small scar but her mother had a keen eye and would likely want to know about every scratch she had received since waking up again.

"I missed you too, Jane. And technically I'm not here. Well, at least, not in this room. Anderson pulled a few strings for me and I had to see you." Jane smiled, pulling her desk chair up to the kinetic barrier as her mom did the same on the other side.

"I'll leave you two alone, then." James said as he got up to leave. Her mom just sat and looked at her for several minutes.

"So, I assume you were out on Spectre ops. Classified, probably." Her mom said calmly and Jane smiled weakly, shaking her head. Her mom was military, she understood, but she knew that her mom had been hurt by her apparent loss.

"No, actually. The story is pretty much true. I was spaced and Cerberus picked me up before the Alliance could. I was in a coma for two years but after getting some cybernetics and the like, they managed to bring me back. After that I agreed to help them against the Collectors and once we destroyed the Collector Base I cut all ties with them and took the Normandy. I'm sorry my messages couldn't be more detailed." Her mom nodded, seemingly accepting her version of events.

"It's alright, I understand. We have plenty of time to catch up now anyway." Her mom said and Jane smiled. She had been worried that her mother would be more upset with her about not getting in touch, she often forgot that Jane was a grown woman.

"I'm glad. It's a little lonely here, even with James." Her mother smiled.

"I was glad when you made friends on the SR1. You always had trouble with it. I remember your first letter about Joker, Alenko and Ashley. I was so sad to hear that Ashely had passed. Are you still friends with the other two?" Jane smiled as she remembered the letter in question. She had sent it just after Eden Prime, before she had met Garrus. At the time she was putting effort into talking to them all but it had been exhausting.

"Actually Joker was waiting for me when I... woke back up. He was piloting the SR2." She said, avoiding the subject of Kaidan. She was still annoyed at him for yelling at her on Horizon and then sending her a letter claiming that he still loved her, despite the fact that they were never together.

"And Kaidan?" Her mom asked and she didn't miss the tone in her voice. She was going to kill James the next time she saw him... Her mind drifted back to the memory of the day when she had hid from Kaidan in the Mako and Garrus had covered for her. She smiled at the memory before she realised what it looked like to her mother.

"I met back up with him on Horizon but he was a total ass. I haven't spoken to him since." She admitted and her mom raised an eyebrow.

"I don't think I've ever heard you insult someone so... outright." Jane blushed a little at that, realising just how much she had changed in the past few years. Sure, she was still nervous and awkward but she was much more likely to stand up for herself, instead of just for others.

"Well, I have a tendency to be too nice sometimes." She reasoned and her mother nodded.

"Yeah, I've noticed. I just never thought you'd realise it." Her mom smiled and Jane smiled back, shrugging a little.

"Yeah. I remember when I met Jack and she said 'shit, you sound like a pussy'. I think she changed her mind after I stopped a charging Krogan by charging at him myself on Korlus." Jane smiled at the memory, and at the memory of Garrus shaking his head in the shuttle on the way back, calling her impossible.

"Well, you were never one for subtlety on the battlefield. I swear, as soon as you're handed a shotgun it's like shy, timid Jane turns into a crazed loon." Jane laughed a little at that, folding her arms as she leant back in her chair.

"So, who's Jack?" Her mother asked.

"She's one of the people I had to recruit for the trip to the Collector Base. I only started out with Joker, Dr Chakwas and two Cerberus operatives." Jane explained and her mom nodded.

"Yes, as much as you're nice to everyone I can't imagine you getting on too well with Cerberus." Jane shook her head at that.

"No, the Illusive Man is a nasty piece of work but the operatives on my ship weren't too bad. Jacob's alright. He was sort of in the same boat as me but it was a bit more voluntary. He saw what needed to be done and realised that Cerberus would be the only ones to do it. Miranda on the other hand wasn't the warmest person at first but she got better as I got to know her. I recruited a whole bunch of people though and they were all brilliant." She explained excitedly, becoming more animated as she spoke about her friends.

She proceeded to tell her mother about how Mordin was always working on the most fascinating experiments, how Kasumi always had decent booze, how interesting Thane was to talk to, how Samara taught her meditation to help her focus her biotics, how surprisingly friendly Legion was (this was of course after explaining how Legion had come to be on her team which had earned her an eye roll from her mother for being too trusting), how Jack always had the right swears for any situation, how sweet it was watching Grunt grow up (not that she'd ever say that with him around) and how Tali was always up for girl talk.

She avoided mentioning Garrus for fear that her mother would quickly pick up on her feelings. She knew she'd have to tell her sooner or later but later sounded best. She was managing quite well until she slipped up when talking about Zaeed.

"So I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt." Jane said as she finished describing how she'd met Zaeed on Omega when she'd returned to find Mordin.

"Really? That seems a little too trusting, even for you." She shrugged at that.

"Maybe but at the time I was headed into a plague zone to pick up Mordin and since the plague was lethal to turians I could only take Miranda or Jacob with me, neither of which I trusted at that point. Also, even if there wasn't a plague, I don't think taking Archangel back to Omega less than twenty four hours after he was supposedly killed would have been such a great idea." She smiled at the memory before she realised what she had just said.

"Archangel? That vigilante on Omega?" Her mother asked and Jane tried to keep on her best poker face.

"How'd you hear about him?" Her mother laughed.

"Putting a dent in Omega puts a dent in the rest of the Terminus systems. I heard he died when the Blue Suns shot a rocket at him. His friends took out the gunship but Archangel didn't make it." Jane smiled a little at that. "So, you knew him?" Her mother asked, trying to read her daughter's emotions.

"Yeah. I was there when he got hit." She smiled sadly at the memories.

"That explains the stories of a 'biotic storm' tearing up the gunship. They must have really annoyed you." Jane wore a cold smile as she remembered the outburst of biotic energy. Had she really believed that if she just ignored her feelings for Garrus, they would go away?

"They shot at my friend. People who try to kill my friends have to deal with me." She said simply.

"So, Archangel was a friend?" Jane knew what was coming but she delayed. Talking about Garrus as a friend for now seemed best. It would let her mother judge him as a person before judging him as her bondmate. Or fiancée. Or whatever...

"Yeah. Do you remember me writing about Garrus?" Her mom nodded.

"A little. You seemed upset in your letters after he returned to the Citadel and I asked Anderson about it. He said that from what he gathered you two were close. He said you were both as bad as each other for making trouble, he was just better at getting a reputation for it." Jane shrugged, smiling sheepishly.

"That pretty much sums it up. He was my best friend on the SR1. I never went on a mission without him and he's one of the few people I've never had trouble talking to." She explained and her mother nodded.

"I remember seeing him at your... at the memorial service. He didn't say much, just something about not getting to choose who hurts you and him liking his choices and hoping that you liked yours. I remember thinking that it sounded like something you would say." Jane bit her lip and shook her head, remembering saying the same words on her recording to him.

"Yeah, it's a reference to a book that we both read. Anyway, that about sums up all of my adventures. What about you and dad? And interesting stories to tell?" Her mom just narrowed her eyes.

"No, no. You don't get of that easily. You haven't told me who this boyfriend of yours is." Jane sighed, her fingers tracing the chain of the holo-locket around her neck.

"Mom..." She groaned, her mother just looking at her.

"Oh, come on Jane. If you don't tell me, I'll have to start guessing." Jane sighed again.

"Mom, just... it's just a little... complicated." Her mom raised an eyebrow.

"If you don't want to tell me, you don't have to. You're a grown woman you can-"

"No, no, I'm going to tell you. Just, like I said, it's complicated." She interrupted her mother's rambling.

"How is it complicated? Is it a girl?" Jane frowned, shaking her head at that.

"No, Mom, it's just-"

"Are you worried I won't approve because I-"

"Mom, I'm sure that you-"

"It's just that I worry about you and it's nice to know now that you have friends and a boyfriend and-"

"_**Mom**_, it's Garrus, okay? It's complicated because it's Garrus and he's a turian and I'm completely and stupidly in love with him. Okay?" Jane finally managed before slumping back in her chair. Her mother regarded her for a few moments.

"Garrus?" She asked and Jane nodded.

"Yes, Mom. Garrus." She repeated, her fingers once again tracing along the chain of the holo-locket.

"And you're in love with him?" Jane sighed before returning her gaze to her mother.

"Of course I am. What are the chances of me being able to ask anyone out unless I was either really drunk or madly in love with them. And I definitely was not drunk." She smiled a bit before sighing again and continuing, pulling the holo-locket from her shirt. "He gave me this just before I came here. Turians don't usually do wedding rings but then again I don't usually do jewellery so we compromised. I guess that's my way of telling you that as soon as I'm out of here we're going to get married you know, by human law. We kind of already are by turian customs..." At that point her mom cracked a grin.

"Your father owes me some credits." She said causing Jane to raise an eyebrow.

"Huh?" Her mother shrugged in response.

"Jane, you're never done anything half-way. You don't do something and then you do it. It's been that way since you were little. You don't crawl and then suddenly you're walking and climbing through the vents, you don't speak a word and then you're suddenly speaking three different languages, you don't have any friends and then you have an entire crew willing to follow you on a suicide mission. I bet your father a while back that the first guy you dated seriously would be the man you would marry." Jane narrowed her eyes.

"I don't like being predictable..." She said, a little sulkily, and her mom laughed.

"So, this might be a dumb question, but are you two happy?" Jane grinned and nodded.

"Yeah. I mean, not right now. Obviously. But, in general? Yeah." Her mom narrowed her eyes a little.

"In truth, Jane, Anderson only put so much effort into getting me here because you... you're not eating nearly enough and James commented in his reports that you're getting more and more distant and restless as time goes on. Is this why?" Jane smiled a watery smile and shrugged half-heartedly.

"Mom, it's been four months. It's... difficult to be separated from him and I don't know how much longer this will last." Her mother nodded, understandingly.

"I know, Jane. I know..."

* * *

Solana sighed as, once again, neither Garrus or her father ate their dinner, both refusing to leave their offices. She was glad that the Primarch had listened to them about the Reapers but she was worried that they were burning themselves out. She decided Garrus would probably be the more reasonable of the two.

"Garrus, did you know? When Shepard died, did you know that she was your bondmate?" Sol asked as she entered his room. Garrus sighed.

"It's not... Like Mom said, she was _always_ my bondmate. I just didn't realise how I felt for her until just after we stopped Saren. Even then, I was sure it wasn't a permanent thing. So, yeah I knew but I was in denial about it. Why?" Sol sighed, folding her arms.

"Garrus, you need to talk to Dad. I know that you're hurting right now but, honestly, I think you'd both be better off if you talked to him. I've tried but I haven't been through what he has. You only talk to him when it's work related and I think that both of you are bottling up what's really wrong. You two are more alike than either of you will admit." Garrus sighed, shaking his head.

"Sol, what do you want me to do? I didn't exactly handle it any better. In fact, I was worse. I headed off to Omega and just started shooting." Sol sighed at that.

"Just talk to him, Garrus. You don't need to _do_ anything, okay? Just _talk_." Garrus sighed and nodded. His sister was right and he knew it, but that didn't make it easy.

* * *

"I need a drink and I suspect you do too. You coming?" Garrus' father raised his head from his terminal to look at his son who was leaning against the door frame.

"Drinking doesn't help..." His dad said and Garrus sighed.

"Yeah, I know, but Sol insisted that we have a heart-to-heart and she had her no-nonsense face on so I decided it was best not to argue. Still, if we're gonna do this I'd like it to be over a drink." His father shrugged, getting up to follow Garrus down to the kitchen.

"Fair enough. The two of us haven't really talked since... I guess since you called me from Omega. I suppose I haven't really been here for you and your sister, huh?" Garrus shook his head, pouring out a glass for each of them.

"It's not your fault. I haven't exactly been... present, either." His father frowned, looking at him questioningly.

"I hadn't noticed. I guess I'm losing my touch. Truth be told your mother was always a better investigator than me, but she never liked the rules at C-Sec." Garrus smiled at that.

"Yeah, never could get anything past Mom." His dad finished his first glass before regarding Garrus closely. Garrus decided at that point to finish his own drink. He figured that it was only a matter of time.

"So, I have an excuse for being mopey, what's yours?" Garrus sighed at that, shaking his head. His hand reflexively moved up to his neck and his fingers brushed his bondmark. His father's eyes widened as he noticed the gesture and Garrus cursed inwardly for being so easy to read.

"Spirits, Garrus... I really haven't been paying attention, have I?" Garrus just shrugged.

"Let's just say I know what you're going through..." He said, avoiding his father's gaze.

"What happened Garrus?" He shrugged again.

"I lost her and I did the exact same thing you're doing now. I threw myself into my work. Problem was that the work I had been doing no longer had any point so I took up a new profession; shooting every criminal I could find on Omega." His father regarded him closely before speaking.

"I had wondered. That was reckless, even for you. But, you got out?" Garrus nodded.

"Yeah, turns out she's not so great at staying dead..." He joked hollowly, his heart aching at their distance.

"So, why aren't you with her now?" Garrus sighed as he watched his father finish his second glass. If he was going to tell him, he'd rather his father be at least a little inebriated.

"Well, she was with me on the Citadel when I first arrived and then she got called away on a top secret mission and is now under arrest for causing the destruction of the Bahak system..." He trailed off and his father frowned before his eyes widened.

"Commander Shepard?!"

"Yep."

"The Spectre?"

"Yeah."

"The _human_ Spectre?"

"That's the one."

"The human Spectre who got you to quit C-Sec and run off with her to chase down Saren?"

"Well, in her defence, I was really just looking for an excuse to leave C-Sec." He reasoned and his father glared at him. He sighed. He knew this was never going to be easy.

"_She_ is your bondmate?!" His father exclaimed angrily and Garrus just shrugged.

"Yeah, see, I knew you were going to have a problem with this." He said, calmly. He wanted to get angry and defend his love to his father but he just shook his head calmly. Jane really was a bad influence, he thought to himself. "Look, I love her. That's not going to change no matter how angry you get about it. The only thing that'll change is how involved you are in my life. Now, I'm going to bed now. I've got a shuttle to Menae early tomorrow. I... I'll talk to you once you've had time to cool off." Garrus put away his glass before heading upstairs again. He was stopped by the sound of his father's voice.

"Your mother knew, didn't she?" Garrus sighed.

"Dad, she had known since the first letter I sent home from aboard the Normandy." His dad laughed a little.

"Yeah, that sounds about right. She was very quick to accept your actions after Shepard died and I had wondered if she knew something I didn't... She was happy for you, Garrus."

"I know, Dad."

"And I guess... I guess I don't have to _like_ Shepard to be happy for you too."

* * *

**AN: I just wanted to say, for those that care, that this was the first chapter I wrote for this fic. It was originally a one-shot of Shepard telling her mom about her and Garrus while remembering all of the important bits and pieces of their relationship. Then it got huge and evolved into this... Anyway, thanks again to everyone who has read this fic and a special thank you to those who have followed and favourited and reviewed, you guys rock! Thanks again and I hope you enjoyed!**

**Now onto ME3...**


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32**

Shepard watched out of the window of her cell as a small boy played with a toy spaceship. Her thoughts went back to Kara and she wondered how she was doing. She would be eleven now. Shepard glanced at her notebook, another concession James had finally managed to get for her, and sighed at the sketch on the open page. A Reaper.

The past two months hadn't been as bad as the first four. The Alliance figured that they would delay the batarians indefinitely and Anderson and Hackett had managed to round up enough support on the Reapers to have her be allowed to advise on how to prepare.

So, every waking moment she had tried to keep her mind on solving the problem of the Reapers instead of... on other things. She had figured out several things from reviewing the data she had collected over the years; identified several patterns. It was all she could do really, given how little they _actually_ knew about the Reapers.

She was worried.

"Commander." James entered her room, deactivating the kinetic barrier. It wasn't that uncommon now for her to be allowed out of her cell and into the facility. Although she still wasn't allowed near any tech.

"You're not supposed to call me that any more, James." She said, flipping closed the notebook to hide the image that haunted her nightmares.

"Not supposed to salute you, either..." She smiled at the joke that had become their greeting over the months that she had been locked up. "We gotta go. The defence committee wants to see you." She frowned at his lack of usual banter. Something was wrong.

"Sound important." She mused, picking up her notebook and following him out of the room. It dawned on her that while she had been out of her room, she hadn't actually been _outside_ since she'd first arrived on Earth. Not that she cared, she was used to being deprived of fresh air for months at a time, but there was something about being planetside and not getting to go outside that bothered her.

"What's going on?" She asked as she weaved her way through the people scurrying about the corridor. Something big was happening.

"Couldn't say. Just told me they needed you... now." She took a deep breath. The defence committee wanting to speak with her urgently screamed one thing - Reapers. She had just figured this out when Anderson approached.

"Anderson." She said.

"Admiral." Chimed in James as Anderson handed Shepard something. She took it and realised what they were.

"Anderson? They're here, aren't they?" She asked as she put on her glasses, the screens activating. Telling her what she already knew.

_Unable to connect - Out of Range_

"We don't know that for certain but whatever it is, it's big and it's headed our way." She nodded, right now she needed to be focused here.

"What else could it be?" She asked, knowing that he was thinking along the same lines. There was no way he would have handed her tech otherwise.

"If I knew that..." He said, confirming what she suspected. She put her hands on her hips, biting her lip a little. It was her 'thinking' stance and Anderson knew not to mess with it.

"They've implemented all of the plans I put forward?" Anderson nodded.

"It took some persuading and time but we're ready." She shook her head.

"No, we're not, but it's a good start. Let's just hope it's enough..." There were plans, protocol and emergency supplies in place for a Reaper attack on Earth but... it would probably just buy them time.

"Tell that to the defence committee." He said and she just raised an eyebrow. If this was the Reapers, there was little they could do now.

"I did tell them. Months ago." She reasoned and Anderson sighed. Figures, the one time Shepard spoke up and had the courage to fight for her ideas, she would be ignored.

"They're just scared. None of them have seen what you've seen. You've faced down a Reaper. Hell, you spoke to one... then blew the damn thing up. You've seen how they harvest us, what they plan to do to us. You know more about this enemy than anyone." She shook her head at that. She might know the most but that didn't mean she knew much.

"That'll be why it took them four months to listen to me and why I'm stuck here instead of _helping_." She sighed with frustration. She knew why she was her but it didn't make it any easier.

"You know that's not true. When you blew up the batarian relay, hundreds of thousands of batarians died." A fire lit in her eyes as he said that, one that Anderson had only seen when she felt the need to protect someone else. This time she was angry on her own behalf.

"It was that or let the Reapers walk through our back door." She growled. She was glad that there were only humans near-by because if anyone could hear her sub-harmonics right then, they would have realised just how angry she was, and how close her biotics were to exploding. She hadn't used them in six months and she was having trouble controlling them through her anger. Anger which she knew, deep down, although justified, was caused by her separation from her bondmate.

"I know that Shepard, and so does the committee. If it wasn't for that, you'd have been court-martialed and left to rot in the brig." His expression softened as he realised the extent of her anger. She sighed, pushing her glasses up her nose, thankful to have them back.

"That and your good word?" Her lips twitched a little and he reckoned that it was about as close to a smile as he was going to get from her at that moment.

"Yeah, I trust you Shepard. And so does the committee." She sighed again at that.

"You know that I'm not good with people, Anderson. Especially not with political bull. Convincing them might be... problematic." She admitted but he just shook his head.

"Shepard, I don't need you to be a politician. I just need you to do whatever the hell it takes to help us stop the Reapers." She nodded, although she suspected that 'whatever it takes' would involve dealing with politicians. It always did.

They finally reached the committee chambers and were greeted by a hurried looking woman.

"They're expecting you two, Admiral." Was all she said before escorting them through to the main chambers, never really taking her eyes off of the data-pad. It left Shepard wondering if any of them really had time for this.

"Good luck in there, Shepard." James said and she nodded.

"Anderson." Came a familiar voice from behind her. "Shepard..." He continued and she turned around, taking a deep breath. It was strange, to see him in person. It had been easy since Horizon to be angry with him for what he had said and to remember all of the times he had made her uncomfortable but seeing him in person was different. She wasn't _really_ angry at him. Sure, she'd been upset, but she had never really blamed him for anything he'd done. Because there had been the other times on the SR1, when she'd slipped up and acted in a socially questionable manner and he had ignored it and not let it affect their friendship. She'd always been glad of that and it had saddened her when he had made it clear that he wasn't content with just friendship because she just didn't care about him like that. And she never would.

"Kaidan." She responded, unsure of how he regarded her. He'd been angry at her on Horizon and in his letter he seemed to still _care_ about her. Neither of which would be fun to deal with but she had to know which one it was.

"How'd it go in there, Major?" Anderson asked, sparing her from any awkward exchanges.

"Okay, I think. It's hard to know. I'm just waiting for orders now." Kaidan said, his attention entirely on Anderson. He seemed as happy as Shepard was for an excuse to avoid conversation with her. She was tempted to ask about his apparent promotion but she kept quiet. She couldn't really deal with Kaidan right now...

"Admiral." The woman from before appeared again, interrupting them.

"Come on." Anderson said and Shepard followed, sparing a glance at Kaidan who nodded to her. Maybe he wasn't mad after all, she thought as they headed towards the committee. Then her enhanced hearing picked up something that should have been outside of her range.

"You know the commander?" James asked.

"I used to..." Was Kaidan's reply and Shepard sighed. He might no longer be mad at her but he certainly didn't trust her.

* * *

Shepard's body pulsed with biotics as she sliced through the husks with her omni-tool's blade. She had been surprised when they had returned the omni-tool to her when she had entered the committee, confirming once gain that things were bad and they needed every soldier they could get. Prisoner or no.

She jumped out of the way, using a one-handed flip to avoid the beam of a Reaper. Anderson just shook his head at the display.

"You'd think that locking you in a cell for six months would make your acrobatic skills a little rusty." He joked and she just smiled.

"I have the advantage of not wearing armour right now. I kept telling you guys that it was too bulky for proper movement on the battlefield." Anderson shook his head as she pushed her glasses up her nose again.

"It also protects you from bullets." He pointed out and she just shrugged, grinning. It had been far too long since she'd been in battle and, although she was painfully aware that Garrus was not on her six, she had to admit that the freedom was exhilarating.

Then she saw the boy again.

He seemed terrified and she extended her hand to him, not knowing if she would be able to protect him but knowing that she had to try. She was reminded, once again, of Kara and couldn't help but wonder if the Reapers had made their way to the Citadel and if she was okay.

"Shepard! In here." Anderson called and she nodded, turning back to the boy.

But he was gone. She took a deep breath, focusing on anything but the worry she now felt for her loved ones. For once she was glad of tugging feeling in her chest. If nothing else it meant that Garrus was alive.

"This is a goddamned mess. Every minute these machines are here, thousands of innocent people die. I won't be responsible." She smiled sadly at that.

"Yeah... I think I said the exact same thing after Bahak. My mind is running over calculations and estimates and... the numbers aren't good." She admitted and he nodded. Numbers were her safety blanket, he knew. Her way of coping was to think of everything as statistics and figures so that she didn't have to think of them as people.

"Exactly. They hit so fast... I thought we'd have more time." Shepard shrugged a little. She hadn't let herself get too optimistic about the time-scale.

"We knew they were coming." She said but Anderson shook his head in anger.

"And they still just cut through our defences! We need to go to the Citadel. Talk to the Council." Shepard put her hands on her hips and nodded. As much as she wanted to fight for Earth... they couldn't do anything more than hold the Reapers back. They didn't have the resources or soldiers to combat the Reapers but the combined strength of every race might be enough. Assuming Earth took the brunt of the attack.

"They might not listen. They've never been great about actually _doing_ anything." Anderson nodded at that, sighing.

"This fight's going to be everywhere soon enough. The Council has to help us." She raised an eyebrow as they walked across a narrow ledge.

"There's a difference between 'has to' and 'will'." She pointed out and he sighed in agreement.

"Yeah, but you're still a Council Spectre. That has to count for something." She rolled her eyes.

"Uh-huh, because they've always listened to me before..." She muttered sarcastically. Sarcasm had always been rare for her in the past but Garrus was a bad influence...

They continued on their way, Shepard keeping her focus on anything but the devastation around her. They approached two soldiers, taking cover next to them.

"Get down, they'll see you." One hissed and she looked over the cover. The was a group of mutated monsters that almost looked like... batarians. Shepard bit her lip as she was reminded of the first time she'd seen a human husk on Eden Prime. She had had no qualms about killing them, whoever they had been was long gone at that point. It wasn't an issue of the bodies being messed with either, she had no particular feelings about a body after death. It was the loss of life. The fact that that person had been killed and the Reapers were waving their loss in her face. She knew that she couldn't protect everyone, it was impossible, but the husks and abominations felt like the Reapers saying 'Look here at this person you failed to protect'.

Her biotics flared once more as she charged towards one of the monsters that her glasses were identifying as a 'Cannibal'. She figured that while she had been locked up Alliance soldiers had encountered and classified more Reaper types, though she suspected that she didn't want to know exactly what warranted that particular name. She'd have some catching up to do...

She sliced through them, wishing she had her shotgun or assault rifle or any weapon, really, apart from the damn pistol. She at least wished for her sword instead of the omni-blade.

The continued onwards, Shepard less than thrilled at having to get so close to those things to fight them. She wished once again for her favourite sniper at her back, or at least a longer range weapon. One wish was, at least, answered as she found an assault rifle by the radio. It came in handy as she held position for the Normandy, although she couldn't have been more glad when the ship finally showed up.

She couldn't help but smile as the Normandy approached and she realised that the Alliance hadn't changed the logo on the side to their own as she had feared they would. It was still _her_ ship.

"Cavalry has arrived." She grinned at the sound of Joker's voice, shaking her head. If there was ever an upside to a Reaper invasion, it would have to be the feeling that she she was finally headed back where she belonged. Although the feeling was dimmed by the knowledge that her bondmate was not by her side...

"About time." Anderson cried and Shepard's grin widened.

"Let's go!" She yelled, heading for the Normandy and being pulled onboard by Kaidan.

"Welcome back, Shepard." He said and she smiled at his attempt to be friendly.

"Thanks." She replied, not trusting herself to say anything more. She suspected that her relationship with Kaidan was fragile and she didn't want to say anything to mess it up.

"Shepard!" Anderson yelled and she frowned at him.

"Come on!" She yelled but he shook his head.

"I'm not going. You saw those men back there. There's millions more like them, and they need a leader." She shook her head at his stubbornness. She should have seen it coming.

"We're in this fight together, Anderson." She pointed out. She didn't want to leave while she could so obviously see destruction, despite the knowledge that she had to.

"Shepard. I know I don't need to tell _you_ why you can't stay." He knew her too well. She shook her head.

"Anderson, they won't listen to me. I'm no politician..." He shook his head.

"You're better than you give yourself credit for, Shepard. Make them listen. Now, go! That's an order."

"I don't take orders from you any more, remember?" She pointed out and he smiled.

"Consider yourself reinstated... Commander." He said, tossing her her dog-tags. "You know what you have to do." She nodded, pushing her glasses up her nose.

"I'll be back for you, and I'll bring every fleet I can. Good luck." She cut into the flesh of her hand as she gripped her dog-tags. Considering her implant enhancements it must have taken some work to draw blood but she didn't care.

"You too, Shepard." She nodded as she headed up the ramp of the Normandy, mindful of Kaidan's watchful eye on her. Her eyes were drawn to the shuttles landing to evacuate civilians. Evacuate them to where, she had no idea. It wasn't as if anywhere on Earth was safe now...

That was when she saw the boy again. Relief filled her heart as she watched him board the shuttle, a reminder that while not everyone could be saved she could take solace in those that could.

And then the Reaper came and tore the shuttle apart.

She turned away, refusing to focus on what had just happened in front of her.

"What the hell is going on? Where's Anderson? Where are we going?" James asked and Shepard sighed, collecting her thoughts for a moment. She had little patience for people second guessing her at that moment.

"Hey!" He called before she had time to get rid of her anger completely.

"We're leaving." She managed through gritted teeth.

"Leaving?" He asked, incredulously and she sighed.

"What's going on?" Kaidan asked and she bit her lip as she placed her dog-tags around her neck, next to her holo-locket.

"As I was telling Vega here, Anderson wants us to go to the Citadel. Get help for the fight." She tried to keep the venom from her voice but she suspected that she hadn't entirely succeeded.

"Bullshit. He wouldn't order us to leave." James spat out and Shepard rounded on him.

"Of course he would! The Normandy is just one ship and it's designed for stealth. In a battle like this one, it might as well be a paper plane. But if we can get help and bring back a whole fleet then we might actually stand a chance. We're out-manned and we're out-gunned, Vega. Our only chance is to fight smart." James wanted to continue arguing but he had spent enough time with her in the last six months to know that her reputation as a brilliant tactician and general know-it-all was well deserved.

"I know, Shepard." He said, sulkily. He knew it but he didn't have to like it.

"I don't like it either, Vega. But this is our only option... If you want to head back and help you can once we reach the Citadel but I could use you right now." He nodded. When Commander Shepard told you she could use your help, you gave it.

"Commander." Came Joker's voice and she smiled.

"Joker! I thought I heard your voice before. You okay?"

"Alive and kicking. Got an emergency transmission from Admiral Hackett for you." She nodded, even though he couldn't see her.

"Patch it through."

The signal came in patchy and kept cutting out but the message was clear. Get Liara from Mars. She allowed herself to smile a little. Having the Shadow Broker aboard would mean knowing where all of her friends were once more.

"Joker, set a course for the Mars Archives." She said as she grabbed her gear.

"This is loco. What does he think we'll find at the Archives?" Shepard smiled but it was strained. It was her threatening, condescending smile that she used when a merc or thug had really pissed her off and James didn't like being on the receiving end of it. Kaidan watched closely as she clasped her hands behind her back.

"Jame, while I usually find your curiosity and constant questioning of things endearing, right now it's damaging my last nerve. So, just shut up and grab your gear before you find out exactly how powerful my biotics are, okay?" James smiled at that. Her temper had been getting worse while she was under lock-up and now she was just as concerned for her loved ones as he was. He shrugged, nodding.

"Yeah, yeah, Commander. I get it." He said and she smiled, thankfully, as she returned to her gear. As James approached Kaidan decided to ask him about the outburst.

"Do you think the Commander is alright? She seems... more confrontational. When I served with her she barely spoke to anyone and she never yelled." Kaidan couldn't help but feel like this wasn't the same Jane he'd known all those years ago. What had happened to the timid, shy Commander who didn't seem to have a mean bone in her body?

"Oh, that? That was just her creative way of telling me she's in a bad mood. The first few weeks of lock-up I thought she had more patience than an asari but as time went on her temper got shorter and shorter. Not that she'd actually ever say or do anything, she'd just warn me that I was being annoying. It gets more creative, the more pissed off she is." James reasoned and Kaidan raised an eyebrow.

"Shepard never really left her quarters on the SR1. It's difficult to believe that she had such a hard time being confined to a larger space." James shrugged at that.

"Well, yeah but she's been cut off from the outside world for six months. That's a long time to go without contact from her friends. Especially her man." Kaidan raised an eyebrow at that.

"Her man?" James nodded.

"She'd never tell me who it was but there was clearly someone she was missing fiercely." Kaidan's mind had just began to process that when Shepard's voice rang out across the hanger.

"If you two old ladies are done gossiping, we've got an archaeologist to save. Come on."

* * *

**AN: I know that I repeated a lot of in-game dialogue this chapter but there was just a couple of places where I felt that my Shepard's responses would be different. It won't happen again, I swear! Thanks to all of you guys for reading and a special thank you to all the people who have favourited, followed and reviewed. You guys are awesome and it means a lot! Hope you enjoyed!**


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter 33**

Shepard was glad to have Liara back, it was nice to be in the presence of an old friend. As much as she counted James as a friend, it wasn't the same, and Kaidan was still wary of her. He didn't trust her when she said that she was no longer with Cerberus and he seemed to be watching her constantly. Comparing her behaviour to the way it had been when they were friends. But she _had_ changed, she knew that much. Although Cerberus had had nothing to do with it.

"Liara... I have to ask-" Shepard started after Kaidan had left the room.

"He's on Palaven. Or, at least, he was a few weeks ago. He'd been making periodic checks of all of the defences in the system so, while he probably hasn't left the system, I can't say for definite that he's still actually _on_ Palaven." Shepard sighed, nodding. She hadn't really expected any more in-depth information but her heart still ached at the distance.

"Thanks, Liara. I don't know what I'd do without you." She smiled at her friend as she heard Kaidan call out from just outside the door.

"Shepard! I found something." She left Liara to her work and the asari gave her a sympathetic smile as she realised how difficult Kaidan's distrust was for her to handle.

"What've you got?" She asked, keeping her tone as pleasant as possible, determined to show him that while she had gotten better at standing up for herself she was still the same old Shepard.

"He's got a transmitter in his helmet. If I can... My god. He looks like a husk." Kaidan frowned as Shepard nodded, pushing her glasses up her nose as she inspected him.

"Yeah, not quite but this is definitely Reaper tech..." She reached down to inspect him more closely, taking scans with her omni-tool to check out later.

"And by they, you mean Cerberus? They did this to their own guy? Is this what they did to you?" Shepard took a deep breath before rounding on Kaidan. She'd had _enough_.

"Little advice for you Kaidan; never compare a girl to a husk. There is no way you come out of that conversation a winner, okay? Yes, I have a few cybernetics, no different than anyone who has been in a serious accident except that they're a little more extensive. They're certainly not _Reaper tech_!" Kaidan sighed.

"Shepard, I don't know who you are any more. Not since Cerberus rebuilt you." Shepard sighed, pushing her glasses up her nose again.

"Kaidan, that was almost three years ago. I've changed. We both have. It has nothing to do with Cerberus, it's just what happens. So, I've gotten better at dealing with other people's shit. I had to in order to deal with everything. You... you hurt me on Horizon Kaidan, and I should have stood up for myself instead of just standing there and letting you tear into me." She hated admitting how badly his words had hurt her but he needed to see that he was as much to blame for her change in behaviour as Cerberus was.

"Shepard I'm-" He started but she cut him off.

"Save it Kaidan. I thought you were my friend but you sure as hell didn't act like it on Horizon and you're still not acting like it now." She sighed, grabbing the radio. He watched her as he saw her anger give way to the pain he had caused and he almost hit himself for being so stupid. This was the woman he loved and he had accused her of being a traitor. Of course that would hurt her. If he was right then she loved him too and it would take more than a simple apology to make it right. So, he decided to stop second-guessing her. This was still _Shepard_ after all.

* * *

Shepard hated Udina. She didn't often _hate_ people but she found no redeeming qualities in the man. And she had tried _really_ hard to find some, she refused to believe that a person could have no likeable aspects. Maybe politics just attracted that kind of person, she thought, as she didn't really like the turian councillor either. Although he, at least, was a little helpful. And he did make sense, she couldn't just expect the other races to give their all to help humanity when their own worlds were also burning. Although she found it funny that the turian councillor was the one most willing to give aid when his world was the one that was in a similarly dire situation.

A fact that had made her insides go cold and her sub-harmonics trill a little with worry. Luckily the turian councillor didn't seem to notice or care. He didn't even seem to register the strange fact that she even had sub-harmonics, indicating just how bad things were.

She'd been to visit Kaidan but he was still unconscious and there nothing that she could do so she headed back to the ship, making one quick stop before she left the Citadel.

"Aunt Jane!" She heard Kara cry from across the bakery as soon as she entered and she wondered when the young girl had started referring to her as 'aunt'. Her Gran gave her a look that made her suspect that it was her doing. "Thank you for the chocolate for my birthday." She said, jumping up and down a little as Jane took a good look at the girl. She had grown almost a foot since she had last seen her and she was less painfully thin. She raised an eyebrow at her Gran about the 'birthday chocolate' and she mouthed 'Garrus' back.

"Why don't you get your aunt a slice of cake, Kara?" Kara nodded.

"Sure, Gran Elle." She headed out of the room and Jane raised her eyebrows at her Gran.

"I don't deserve him, do I?" She asked and her Gran smiled.

"I'm sure he's asking himself the same question about you. Your mother called." Jane groaned at that.

"So, what's the verdict? She seemed happy about it when she talked to me but we both know that isn't the full story." Her Gran sighed at that, rolling her eyes a little.

"She is happy that you found someone-"

"But?"

"But she's worried. I think it's just because she doesn't know Garrus but... she worries about you." Jane smiled at that.

"She doesn't like that he's turian?" Her Gran sighed.

"It's not that but... it doesn't help. She just doesn't want you to make a mistake." Jane rolled her eyes.

"She does remember that I'm ten years older than she was when she had me and married Dad, right?" Her Gran nodded.

"Yes but you've always been a bit more... closed off than she is." Jane sighed.

"You mean I was a shut-in? Fair enough, I just... I wish she'd tell _me_ this." Her Gran nodded.

"I know but she doesn't want you to think that she's not being supportive. And she is, it's just going to take her a little while to get used to. Anyway, your dad sends his love. I think he sent you a message while you were locked up." Jane frowned and checked her omni-tool and saw a message from her dad.

"Thanks Gran. So, how's Kara? And when did she start calling me 'Aunt Jane'?" Her Gran shrugged.

"It was better than her calling you 'Shepard'. Plus, she has been quite the little defender of yours. It's sweet. And 'Uncle Garrus' has been checking in every now and then with a vidcall. He sent her a birthday present from the both of you, like she mentioned." Jane nodded, trying to keep the sadness from her yes.

"How is he?" Her Gran gave her a sympathetic look.

"About as good as you, I suspect. You've been locked up in a cell for six months and you've _lost_ weight. I don't think you two being kept apart is good for either of you." Jane shook her head.

"No, it's not been easy." Jane admitted as Kara returned.

"So, eat some chocolate cake for now and then head back out there and _find him_." Jane smiled at that and nodded. It seemed as good a plan as any.

* * *

Jane sighed, heading to her cabin. She had just been given a tour of the redecorated Normandy and while some of the changes had made sense and she liked the new communication systems, she had been saddened by the loss of Mordin's lab. It acted as just another reminder that her old crew had all gone their separate ways.

She had decided that she like Traynor much more than she had liked Chambers. She was nice but understood _ boundaries_. It was nice to have Joker and EDI back, anyway. She had missed those two and their bickering was enough to bring a smile to her face, despite everything. And James seemed to have calmed down about returning to Earth, finally seeing the point of what they were doing. Jane also loved having Liara back aboard and had spent a good while geeking out over her tech set-up in the XO's office.

But now she was tired and _had_ to sleep, although she feared the nightmares. She was scanning her omni-tool messages when she realised that she had one from her dad still, telling her to message him whenever she got the chance. She didn't know which ship he was on or if he was able to respond to her messages but she figured she might as well try.

_Hey Dad. - JPS_

He responded in minutes.

_Hey Jane. You okay? - DarthShepard_

_Yeah. You and Mom okay? - JPS_

_We're both fine. You've changed your messaging name. What's the P for?__ - DarthShepard_

_Phoenix. It's my crime fighting nickname.__ - JPS_

_Awesome.__ - DarthShepard_

_Says 'Darth Shepard'.__ - JPS_

_Well, it was just JShepard but everyone thought I was you.__ - DarthShepard_

_Fair enough. Where are you guys?__ - JPS_

_We're checking the colonies out in the Terminus. You?__ - DarthShepard_

_Off to Palaven.__ - JPS_

_Going to see your boyfriend?__ - DarthShepard_

_So Mom told you? Or was it Gran?__ - JPS_

_Hey, many Bothans died to bring me this information.__ - DarthShepard_

_Ha! So, Mom then.__ - JPS_

_Yeah. So, you heard from him?__ - DarthShepard_

_No... I'm worried.__ - JPS_

_I know, Jane. I know.__ - DarthShepard_

_So, Gran says Mom's freaking a little.__ - JPS_

_Mam needs to stop worrying so much. Your mother's very happy for you.__ - DarthShepard_

_She just doesn't trust my decision making skills.__ - JPS_

_She worries about you.__ - DarthShepard_

_So I've heard...__ - JPS_

_She's your mum, it's her job.__ - DarthShepard_

_I know Dad. I'm just a little stressed right now.__ - JPS_

_I know Jane. Now, go find your boyfriend or bondmate or whatever. And tell him that if he hurts you I have a hatchet in the trunk.__ - DarthShepard_

___He's not going to get the reference Dad. Watching classic holiday films isn't exactly at the top of our to-do list.__ - JPS_

___Then tell him you got your proficiency with a shotgun from me, not your mother.____ - DarthShepard__  
_

___I will. Night Dad.__ - JPS_

___Night Jane. ____- DarthShepard_


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter 34**

Watching Palaven burn was breaking Shepard's heart.

She couldn't _not_ see the fiery orange glow across the surface of the planet as she fought across the moon. It reminded her of Mindoir, of how she'd watched it burn from orbit and had been left to wonder if her family was safe. Now she had that all too familiar feeling of uncertainty as she wondered where Garrus was. She could feel him through their bond, more strongly now than she had been able to for six months. The tugging feeling in her chest was almost unbearable as she sliced through the mutated monsters that the Reapers sent at her.

She'd been glad when she had found her old belongings, including her sword, packed away on the Normandy. Although one or two of the belongings weren't hers. They were just little things, all of the belongings were like that. She'd never been a one for _things_. They were bits of tech that she'd been half way through modding, her clothing (she'd been stuck with Alliance standard issue fare on Earth) and her toiletries. All packed away in boxes under the bed in her quarters. She suspected that they'd just grabbed everything and thrown them in, not giving a care to what it was. So, when she was searching through her things she'd been surprised to find an old tube of dextro toothpaste. It made sense that Garrus wouldn't have bothered to pack it when he left for Palaven but seeing it had only reminded her that the room wasn't hers. It was_ theirs_.

She was pulled out of her thoughts by a group of husks attacking them as Liara finished fixing the comm tower.

"Liara, singularity!" She yelled as a bunch of husks approached. The first thought she'd had when she'd seen a husk was that she wished that she had learnt the control to generate a singularity herself. It took too much precision, too much practice. So she settled for throwing a shockwave into the singularity and watching the husks explode. She missed having Garrus on her six, knowing that he would snipe every enemy that she couldn't pummel but since he wasn't here, she'd have to think about her tactics for once. The challenge was refreshing but she was paying for it as she felt a shot hit her in the shoulder and then a husk got her in the leg. She'd sooner have her turian by her side.

"Come on, guys. Back to the camp." She said and they nodded, following her. She felt Liara watching her carefully and she knew that her friend was worried about her. As sweet as it was, it was also annoying as hell. Sure, she missed her bondmate and wanted nothing more than to have him by her side but she could still do her job.

Shepard sighed in relief as the tugging in her chest became less insistent. It was still there, still telling her that there was a Garrus shaped hole on her six, but it seemed to lessen the closer she got to the camp and she was glad for it as she approached General Corinthus. She wasn't used to being surrounded by turians and she was having a little trouble keeping her sub-harmonics in check. Although, to their credit, none of the turians she had spoken to had seemed phased by their existence.

"What have you got?" She asked as she approached Corinthus, determined to at least _seem_ on top of things so that Liara would stop giving her that damned _look_.

"As your partner said, succession is usually simple. But right now, the hierarchy's in chaos - so many dead or MIA." Shepard swallowed back her worry at that last part, clamping down hard on her sub-harmonics. She was angry at herself for not being able to push aside her feelings and at Liara for making her so damn aware of that fact. She fuelled that rage into her mission, hoping to keep it together.

By the time she responded she was too busy controlling her rage into a tool, a weapon, that she didn't notice that the tugging in her chest has stopped or notice a loading bar replace the 'unable to connect' message in the corner of her screen.

"I need someone - I don't care who, as long as they can get us the turian resources we need." She allowed her sub-harmonics to convey her sense of urgency and hoped that the situation would be resolved soon.

That's when she heard him.

"I'm on it, Shepard. We'll find you the primarch."

"Garrus." She managed as she stood, a little shocked as she looked him up and down and finally felt him through their bond again. "How's the shoulder?" She said, almost a whisper, as it became apparent that the injury she had felt before hadn't been hers.

"Fine. Medi-gel took care of it. Your leg?" He asked, his voice just as small as hers.

"Cybernetics closed it up." He nodded and she bit her lip as all of the emotions she'd been bottling up since she'd left him on the Citadel suddenly crashed into her at full force. She'd almost forgotten what it was like, to feel him next to her as an extension of herself. She wanted nothing more than to run into his arms and double and triple check that he was really here. That it was really _him_.

And he felt it too, she could feel his need to wrap his arms around her as he had when she had shown up on Omega. His guardian angel, appearing out of nowhere when he most needed her. But there was something else there, a small restraint. As much as he wanted to wrap his arms around her, he was worried.

_Worried about your buddies finding out about your human bondmate?_ She asked silently, joking a little to hide the truth of her question. She'd had that small fear, in the back of her mind, that it had been six months and he had moved on. Gone home and realised that what they had wasn't _really_ what he wanted...

_Worried that you don't like your personal life being the centre of attention and turian soldiers are terrible gossips._ He replied reassuringly, and she nodded slightly as he had detected her worry and his reply had the undertone of 'of-course-not-ani'. He was right, there was a difference between not being ashamed of each other and making the equivalent of a public announcement.

_Fine, but the second we're done here..._ She let her mind drift to the memories that had kept her sane during lock-up and he did the same, causing her to smile and shake her head a little.

The entire exchange had lasted one, maybe two seconds.

"Vakarian, sir - I didn't see you arrive..." Shepard noted that the general had called him 'sir' and wondered just what exactly Garrus had been up to while she'd been away. Had he gone all respectable on her?

"At ease, General." She almost laughed. If his sarcastic attitude had rubbed off on her, maybe her patience had rubbed off on him...

"Good to see you again. I thought you'd be on Palaven." _I worried you'd be on Palaven_ She added silently.

"If we lose this moon, we lose Palaven. I'm the closest damn thing we have to an expert on Reaper forces so I'm... advising." He said, a little awkwardly, and she nodded. There was a story there but now wasn't the time.

"James, this is Garrus Vakarian. He helped me stop the Collectors. He's a hell of a soldier." She introduced, hiding a smirk. She wondered how long it would take James to figure out that Garrus was the mysterious 'man' he'd been teasing her about.

"Lieutenant. Good to see you too, Liara." The asari stepped forward, giving a slight glance to Shepard who gave her friend the 'not-one-word' look.

"Good to see you in one piece, Garrus." She said and Shepard nodded. It really was.

* * *

Shepard sat next to Garrus on the shuttle ride back to the Normandy, taking comfort from having him so close to her. They needed each other as they both felt the weight of their new responsibilities taking their toll. Although neither of them could get away from the sense of joy and disbelief of finding each other again.

"If there was ever proof that the krogan aren't given enough credit..." Garrus murmured to her as they left the shuttle, causing her to smile.

"I'd better have some quarters sorted out..." Shepard started when Traynor's voice interrupted.

"Commander, EDI has been acting up so I've been looking into it." Shepard smiled at that.

"Traynor, you know as much as I appreciate it, you don't have to do that." She said, mouthing 'new girl' to Garrus who nodded.

"It's no problem, Commander. Anyway, we have VIP quarters for the Primarch and his advisor but Joker suggested that Vakarian might want other arrangements and he said to talk to you..." She trailed off, obviously a little confused and Shepard stifled a giggle as she bit her lip and turned to Garrus.

"Well, what do you think, Garrus? Your old sleeping arrangements are, of course, open to you. If you still want them, that is." She tried to keep the suggestion out of her tone, all too aware of Cortez, James and the Primarch not two feet away from them.

"I can't think of anything I want more." He said, looking her dead in the eye and making her heart skip a beat.

"Yeah, Garrus will return to his old arrangements if that's okay." Shepard said to Traynor.

"Right, so that's the Main Battery, then? That's what your previous XO's reports have written down and what EDI told me." Shepard raised an eyebrow to Garrus, smiling a little at her crew's attempts to be discreet about their relationship.

_You don't trust this crew?_ He asked her silently and she bit her lip again.

_They're Alliance._ She told him but it had no real meaning. They both knew that there were plenty of xenophobes in the Alliance. Add to that the fact that Alliance soldiers were terrible gossips...

_So..._ He said mentally and she sighed a little.

_There's also a reporter downstairs. So, let's not _hide_ anything but let's not shout about it either. I don't really want our private lives all over the news..._ He nodded a little.

_I'm with you on that one. So, the 'main battery'?_

_If you're okay with that. If you're not I'll tell her right now that you'll be bunking with me..._

_No, it's okay. I think a little discretion might be a good idea. What with the Primarch of Palaven aboard and everything._

_Yeah, I don't want to responsible for any kind of incidents..._

_Since when?_ She smiled at that. Their connection seemed stronger, if anything, for the time apart and their entire conversation had taken a matter of seconds.

"Yeah, Traynor. Not much can keep Garrus from his calibrations." She smiled at him playfully and he gave the turian equivalent of a raised eyebrow, folding his arms. _Spirits, I've missed him..._ She thought to herself as they entered the lift and headed up to investigate what was going on with EDI, leaving the Primarch with James and Cortez.

"Why do I feel as if I missed a good half of that conversation?" Victus asked and James and Cortez both shrugged.

"I know what you mean..." James said, shaking his head. "Anyway, I'll show you to your quarters, Primarch."

* * *

When Shepard finally got to her quarters she hit the button on the wall and a random song began to play, making her smile.

"_I woke up this morning, a funny taste in my head,_  
_Spackled some butter over my whole grain bread,_  
_Something tastes different, maybe it's my tongue,_  
_Something tastes different, suddenly I'm not so young._

_I'm just a stranger, even to myself,_  
_A re-arranger of the proverbial bookshelf,_  
_Don't be a fool girl, tell him you love him,_  
_Don't be a fool girl, you're not above him._

_I never thought I could love anyone but myself,_  
_Now I know I can't love anyone but you,_  
_You make me think that maybe I won't die alone._  
_Maybe I won't die alone._" She sang along with the music as she re-arranged her data-pads, not hearing Garrus enter.

"Spirits Jane, I missed you." He said, striding up to her and holding her close as she dropped her data-pads to the ground and wrapped her arms around him, her heart thundering in her chest.

"I missed you too." She murmured before kissing him, pouring every second of feeling incomplete without him into the kiss and taking his breath away.

"You ever think about that shuttle ride after we helped Grunt?" He asked as he lowered his forehead to hers and nodded a little.

"Of course, why?" He smiled at that, his talons around her waist pulling her closer to him.

"Because I feel just as nervous now as I did then..." He admitted and she laughed a little, biting her lip.

"Me too. We're a right pair, aren't we?" She asked, shaking her head a little.

"That we are, Jane. That we are..." He murmured before she pressed her lips to his once again, her fingers working on the clasps of his armour.

* * *

Jane awoke without the nightmares for once. No memories of being spaced or of the batarians she had killed, both in the slave camp and by destroying the alpha relay, or of watching Mindoir burn from orbit. She grinned as she turned to face the sleeping turian next to her, only to find that he wasn't sleeping.

"Hey." She said softly, pressing her forehead to his.

"Hey." He replied and she grinned, still a little disbelieving that he was back. "I know, ani. Me too..." Her heart lept when he called her ani. It had been so long...

"Damn it, I missed you Garrus." She whispered conveying her memories of her time spent locked up to him across their connection, especially every second she had missed him. Then she hit the point in her memories when her mother had visited...

"So, how'd she take it?" He asked and she smiled a little at how nervous he seemed.

"She worries about me but that's not new. I think she's happy about us, for the most part. Dad's definitely okay with it, at least. Although he told me to tell you that if you hurt me he has a hatchet in the trunk." Garrus gave her a questioning look and she smiled a little.

"I don't know what a 'hatchet' or a 'trunk' is, but I get the feeling that I should be scared." She grinned.

"Very. A trunk is the storage compartment of a vehicle and a 'hatchet' is a type of axe so..." Garrus nodded at that.

"Tell him 'message received'." He said and she grinned before frowning a little.

"We haven't had a Christmas together, have we?" She asked and he shook his head.

"That's a human holiday, right?" She nodded.

"Yeah. Gran and Dad were never huge on it, it was just an excuse for them to spoil me, but my mom's family were fairly religious so every Christmas we'd have a big dinner at my Aunt's house. It was nice..." She smiled at the memories as Garrus held her a little tighter and she braced herself for her next question.

"So, did you ever tell you dad about us?" Garrus sighed before relaying all of his memories of their time apart, although he had to stop once he reached his mother's death and it was Jane's turn to hold him tighter.

"I'm so sorry, Garrus." She said softly and he nodded.

"It's alright, Jane. I'm just... I'm glad that I was there for her, Sol and Dad. Even if I wanted to be somewhere else..." Jane nodded, understanding. He began to relay the memories again, starting a little while after his mother had died, right up until the night that he had come clean with his father.

"How did you manage to not go all Archangel on him? Patience isn't exactly what you're known for Garrus." She joked and he smiled at her.

"I keep telling you Jane; you're a bad influence. But, Sol talked with him after I left for Menae. Apparently Mom had put her in charge of talking some sense into him when I told him. She'd accpeted you as a daughter and she wanted to make sure that he did the same..." He trailed off for a few moments as his mind filled with bittersweet memories. "Anyway, Sol said that he still doesn't like the sound of you but he doesn't want to cause me any pain. And, as she said, she didn't like you until she talked to you properly. I'm still not sure how you got her to like you so much..." He wondered and she smiled.

"Oh, we had a little girl-bonding." He looked at her, questioningly.

"What about?" She smiled.

"Weapons mods. Her shotgun was very impressive." Garrus shook his head, laughing a little.

"She was threatening you with it, wasn't she?" Jane shrugged.

"Maybe, but the point is that we have a lot in common... I guess you still haven't heard form them, huh?" He shook his head a little.

"No. Last I heard they were still on Palaven... Sol's a good fighter. Almost as good as me, not that I'd ever tell her that, and she was serving with the military right up until Mom got really bad a few years back. And Dad can hold his own in a fight too so I wouldn't count them out just yet but..." He trailed off and she held him close.

"You're worried..." He nodded.

"Yeah." He admitted and she sighed.

"Me too. I know that not everyone's going to come out of this but... I can't stop myself from hoping." He smiled a little.

"I think that's one of the reasons I love you so much. You're endlessly optimistic without being naive." She smiled at that.

"And you're a realist without being a complete downer. And it's one of the reasons why I love you too..."


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter 35**

"Garrus! Garrus! Have you seen our new crew member?!" Shepard asked him excitedly as she entered the Main Battery. He sighed but couldn't help but smile at the excitement on her face. At least this new exciting addition wasn't necessarily as dangerous as Legion had been...

"Yes, ani. I was there when you picked him up, remember?" She grinned.

"I know, I know. It's just so _interesting _to learn about the Protheans from a direct source. Even if he could give you a run for your money in the 'grumpiest person on the ship' awards." She joked, her hand stroking the side of his mandible as she stood close to him.

"'Grumpy', huh?" He smiled at her as she leant closer to him.

"Yeah, Garrus. _Grumpy_." At that he pulled her close and kissed her, catching her by surprise a little. "How about now?" He asked, grinning as she caught her breath.

"Decidedly less grumpy." She managed, still pressed close to him. "You've gotten better at kissing." She pointed out and he shrugged a little, still grinning.

"I've had a lot of practice." She grinned back at him.

"Speaking of practice... Need to be anywhere right now?" He kept grinning, shaking his head.

"Not particularly..." Her grin widened.

"EDI, make sure no one enters the Main Battery until I say so, okay?"

"Acknowledged, Shepard."

* * *

Shepard leant against the railings in the War Room as she observed the primarch. Victus had barely left the front of his screen since they had left Menae and Shepard couldn't blame him. The only thing keeping her from doing the same was that Garrus could feel her wearing herself down and would come and tell her to take a break and at least rest. She would get annoyed over it if she wasn't doing the exact same thing when she felt him build up too much stress.

"Hey Victus, you okay?" She asked finally as she approached him. He sighed and nodded a little.

"Yeah, Shepard. I'm fine just..."

"Stressed and worried and feeling a little bit helpless without a gun in your hands?" He nodded and she leant against the wall near him.

"Yeah. I guess you're feeling like that too?" She nodded sighing a little as she was reminded of her own worries.

"For the most part I'm dealing but I've got friends on board who can tell when I need some relief, I guess I'm worried that no one is telling you to stop before you burn out." Victus nodded again, leaning against the terminal he had been working on.

"To be honest Commander, stress relief is a little different for turians..."

"Sparring, right?" Victus gave her a questioning look and she shrugged a little. "Garrus has been on my team for a really long time. I'd be a pretty lame CO if I didn't make sure my crew was working at their optimum, turian or no." Victus nodded once again.

"I was wondering how he was dealing with it. On Menae he seemed stressed out of his mind. He tried sparring with some of the other soldiers but Garrus is known as an expert in hand-to-hand combat and he couldn't find an adequate challenge. I wonder, who does he spar with on the Normandy?"

"Me." Shepard tried not to blush as she spoke. Technically they had sparred. Once. And they had both come out winners that time.

"Really? No offence Commander but you don't look like much and I can't imagine you holding yourself in a fight with a fire-arm or your biotics." She shrugged. She knew that she didn't look threatening or intimidating. She often counted on it as it diffused far more unpleasant situations than words ever could.

"No offence taken. I go out of my way to have others underestimate me. It makes getting away with things much easier if no one even thinks to look your way." She smiled, tilting her head to the side as she brought her hand up to twist at her holo-locket.

"Well, you must have left an impression on Garrus. Honestly, I was worried that he was getting sick from stress." Shepard shrugged at that, trying to keep her face neutral as she noticed him watching her carefully and frowning a little.

"Well, luckily he's cheered up since being back. But you are avoiding the subject. We're about to dock on the Citadel for a quick supply run and I would urge you to do something that isn't sitting here in front of numbers that you can't change." He sighed at that as she gave him her best 'no-arguments' look that she had often used to scold Grunt or Jack when they had gone a little too far.

"Okay, Commander. You're right..." She smiled at that before nodding and going to find Garrus.

* * *

"What's wrong? You seem uneasy." Garrus stood next to her as she looked over the Citadel from the Presidium Commons. She leant into him, not caring who saw.

"It's just... something James said when we first came here. Before we picked you up." She sighed, her mind still ticking away with worry.

"What did he say?" He asked as she bit her lip.

"He said that it was as if the Citadel made you forget about the war... I've just been thinking that the Reapers don't seem like the types to have only one level of trap, you know?" He nodded.

"Yeah. You think that we didn't stop all of their plans for the Citadel with Sovereign?" She sighed, nodding a little.

"I think that we're dumb to still be using the Citadel as the heart of galactic politics. I mean, James is right there is _something_ about it that makes you want to forget and the Council sure as hell seem to have forgotten what's going on beyond this station. But... this is a war. No where is ever _safe_ so there's nothing to do. It's just... it's putting me on edge." She admitted and he nodded.

"I know, ani. Why don't we get some food and head home?" She sighed again, sorely tempted to lock herself in her quarters with her bondmate and some junk food but she couldn't just yet.

"Can't. I still have to see Kaidan." Garrus growled a little at that.

"You don't _have_ to, ani." She smiled at that.

"Garrus, I don't _have_ to do anything. I do it anyway. You should know this by now." He sighed, he did know it. All too well.

"You're going to forgive him, aren't you? For calling you a traitor on Horizon and then comparing you to a husk on Mars." Shepard sighed as she heard the anger in his sub-harmonics.

"Garrus, you know me. I don't really do angry for the little things." He sighed at that. Only she would classify _anything_ less than threatening someone with physical violence 'little'. He lowered his forehead to hers and she didn't object. She was nervous and she needed this.

"I know, ani. I could come with you, if you want. I promise I'll behave." She shook her head a little.

"No, Garrus. I have to do this by myself, to prove that I can." He smiled a little.

"I thought you didn't _have_ to do anything." She hit him lightly.

"Baka. I'll message you as soon as I'm done, okay?" He nodded, pulling away from her.

"Okay, I'll pick up some food." She smirked at that.

"Just make sure it's edible if you're buying levo." He shook his head, smiling.

"I probably won't chance it. What's the point in modding cybernetics so that you can eat dextro food if you're not going to?" She grinned, shaking her head as she moved away.

"Fine, fine. Dextro it is. See you in a bit." She called as she headed into the elevator and up to Huerta Memorial.

* * *

"So, what did Udina want?" Shepard had waited until the human councillor had left before entering, not wanting to be anywhere near that asshole.

"He was offering me a position as a Spectre." She smiled at him, sitting down next to him.

"Nice one. So, what did you tell him?" Kaidan looked away, focusing on something out of the window. Maybe he was just focusing on anything but her. She wondered what he saw when he looked at her. The scars left when Cerberus had rebuilt her had faded, an upside of her positive attitude, but her skin was still marked here and there with old wounds that had never properly healed (she'd never been good at listening to the doctors) and, of course, her bondmark. But just because she looked like her old self didn't mean that that's what Kaidan _saw_. Did he still see her as scarred like she was on Horizon?

"I told him I'd think about it. What do you think?" She shrugged, not feeling qualified to give her opinion. Of course, being the first human Spectre she had a unique perspective, but what was right for her wasn't necessarily right for him.

"It sounds like a good idea to me." She settled on before they settled into an awkward silence. "So... you wanted to see me?" He sighed, finally turning to look at her. She couldn't read his expression and it troubled her a little. She'd never been great at reading emotions in others but she knew that if she misread something or said the wrong thing right now it might mess things up.

"Yeah, Shepard. I just wanted to know... After Horizon and Mars, we're good, right?" She sighed, biting her lip as she nodded her head.

"Yeah, Kaidan. I meant what I said on Mars about you hurting me but I'd gotten over it. I was just stressed after being locked up for so long." He nodded, seeming to understand.

"I know. I... I didn't mean to hurt you. I was just shocked to see you alive." She nodded, understanding.

"I get it, Kaidan. Like I said I _was_ hurt and then I was angry but honestly? We were friends once and I don't want to lose that over a few arguments so as long as you stop fighting me and start trusting me again, I want to still be friends." She reasoned. He seemed a little uneasy.

"Yeah, Shepard. Your friendship means a lot to me but... there was something else there when we served together aboard the SR1 and I want you to know that I still _care_ about you." She squirmed a little at that.

"Kaidan, I want to be your friend but..." He shook his head, interrupting her.

"I know I screwed up. On Horizon and on Mars but... I was in love with you back on the SR1 and I still am. I know that you're in love with me too and I just hope I didn't screw up my chance with you." Jane sat there, her face bright red. What did she say? What could she say? She wasn't used to guys telling her that they liked her, never mind _loved_ her. Apart from Garrus but that didn't count because she had felt the same way. She had reached the edge of her social knowledge. There was no precedence for how he would react to anything she said, there just wasn't enough data for her to accurately predict the best response... For once she knew nothing and she hated the feeling. It was the reason she had avoided social situations in the past but she had thought that put the majority of her difficulties behind her. The interactions she'd had on both of the Normandy's had allowed her to identify patterns in behaviours and recognise the responses expected from her.

But she had no idea how to proceed with Kaidan...

"Kaidan, I'm not in love with you." Was all she could manage. He frowned at that, confused.

"But I thought... James said that you had someone that you cared about and I thought..." She sighed, shaking her head. She was going to kill James when she got back to the ship.

"James is an idiot." She said and Kaidan looked at her, a little hopefully.

"So, there isn't anyone?" She sighed. As much as she didn't want her relationship with Garrus spread around for the likes of that Kalisah woman to hear, she also needed to get Kaidan off of her back.

"I didn't say that, Kaidan." She pulled the holo-locket from under her shirt and he gasped softly as he recognised what it was.

"So, you..." He started and she sighed, interrupting him.

"Are married. Yes." He frowned again.

"Why didn't you say anything when I asked you out on the SR1?" She sighed at that, resisting the temptation to pull her knees up to her chest.

"It's a fairly new development." He gave her a questioning look.

"How new?" She shrugged.

"Just over six months, I guess." She sighed, not used to answering questions about her relationship. It just sort of _was_. There had never been any sort of plan or process to it and they were both still fumbling their way through their respective cultures.

"So, he was a member of your crew?" She sighed, nodding.

"Yeah, he is." She admitted and his frown deepened.

"So, back on the SR1 when you said that you didn't date crew..." She cringed a little, remembering the conversation.

"Well, I never _had_ dated crew before and I didn't want to hurt your feelings." She said, sheepishly but he frowned.

"So you lied." He sounded a little angry and upset but she shook her head.

"Kaidan, I didn't lie. I _didn't_ date crew. In fact I didn't _date_. I didn't change that fact for you because as much as I care about you as a friend, I don't think of you like that. I'm sorry." She shrugged a little, not meeting his gaze. She hadn't wanted to make him mad and she hadn't wanted to upset him.

"So, who is he?" He asked and she sighed. Finding out would only make him angrier, she knew that much.

"Does it matter? Kaidan, you're only going to upset yourself by continuing with this..." But that only made him angrier, causing him to grab at her holo-locket, activating it. He watched, his mouth slightly agape as he watched holo-Garrus wrap his arms around holo-Shepard's waist and kiss her. She turned it off just as her holo-self raised it's hand to give the finger to the invisible audience.

"It's _Garrus_?!" He asked and she nodded, her face still red. She had never been one for blushing, her golden skin tended to keep it to just a light flush across her cheeks in even the most embarrassing situation but her face felt like lava as she knew that she was upsetting him. She hated upsetting people, no matter the reason.

"Yeah. We got together not that long after I saw you on Horizon." She told him, hoping to make it clear that she had meant what she had said on the SR1.

"Did you... I mean, was it because of what I said on Horizon? Did I screw up my shot with you and you ran to him?" She sighed at that, running her hand through her ponytail.

"No, Kaidan. Like I said, I never cared about you like that." He sighed, nodding.

"I'm sorry, Shepard. It's just difficult to picture you two together. He doesn't seem like your type." Jane raised an eyebrow at that.

"Oh? Why is that?" She asked. Everyone else seemed to think that they were a perfect match.

"It's just... you don't have a lot in common..." She frowned at that.

"Kaidan, we have tons in common. Sure, we don't agree on everything but for the most part we're like flip sides of the same coin. In fact the biggest difference would be... that's it isn't it? By 'my type' you mean 'human'." Kaidan shrugged at that, it was his turn to blush a little.

"It's not just that, Shepard. You're beautiful and smart and strong and you could have anyone you wanted. He's got missing half his face..." Shepard frowned at that, sure the wound had been bad at first but since he'd taken the bandage off, the scars made him look dangerous and, frankly, down-right _hot_.

"Maybe I just have a thing for guys with scars." She reasoned, shrugging as her blush deepened as she processed what he had been saying before he had insulted Garrus. "Plus, I'm not the catch that you seem to think I am and he doesn't care. Kaidan, it's _Garrus_. He's always been able to impress me without even trying, even when we first met." Kaidan frowned at that.

"When you first met you almost shot him." He pointed out and she smiled, shaking her head.

"No, I'd met him once before when we were kids. He was so damn... sweet. And awkward and shy." She admitted a little awkwardly as she shrugged a little. Kaidan just sighed.

"I never stood a chance, did I? He's always had your heart." She shrugged again.

"He's my bondmate. Always has been, always will be. I think it was just a case of how long it took me to realise it." She smiled and he smiled back a little. He was in pain but it would take a special kind of dense to not realise how happy Garrus made her.

"Alright, Shepard. I'm sure you've got better things to do than entertain me. I'll see you?" She nodded.

"Yeah. Get better soon, Kaidan." He nodded as she left the room sighing. She was glad that she'd cleared the air between them but it had exhausted her.

She was only a little surprised when Garrus greeted her in the hospital waiting room and pulled her into his arms.

"Guess who I found?" He murmured in her ear, causing her to pull away and grin as she saw the familiar figure next to him.

"Thane!" She cried happily, keeping her arm firmly around Garrus. Thane was about as big on hugs as she was so she was quite content to remain leaning against her turian.

"It is good to see you, Siha." He said smiling and she grinned back.

"You too, I missed you. Your spot in life support is still free if you want it." His smile took on a bitter-sweet edge as he shook his head.

"No, Siha. You need the best with you and I am not at mine. The Kepral's Syndrome is taking it's toll and has left me weak." She bit her lip, her eyes showing the pain she was feeling for her friend.

"I'm so sorry, Thane. How long?" Jane was visibly upset for him but Thane's cool demeanour never changed.

"Different doctors say different things. My favourite gave me six months. Nine months ago." She nodded, taking a deep breath to steady her upset features.

"Are you... I mean, does it hurt much?" He shook his head.

"No, Siha. You know how it works. Over time I get weaker and I can't really track the brain damage. I am well cared for here and my son visits every day so don't worry." She nodded at that, not trusting her own voice. While the absence of Garrus had been at the forefront of her mind, she had grown close to every member of her crew and counted them all as family. To lose one would be difficult. Just as it had been to lose Ashley.

"Shepard?" Thane asked, drawing her out of the painful memories. "I don't want you to blame yourself. You and Mordin did everything you could. You even gave me some extra time with my son. So, thank you, Siha. You have been a good friend." She smiled as he realised what she had begun to think. She had worked with Mordin on a cure for Kepral's as one of their side-projects. They had made a little progress but not much. Not enough...

"Thank you, Thane. That means so much to me. You are someone that I am glad to count amongst my closest friends, my family... I promise I'll visit next time I'm on the Citadel, okay?" He smiled at her, nodding.

"That's fine, Siha. Now, you'd better go. You look tired." She smiled at that, realising that Garrus was essentially propping her up at this point. Neither of them had slept well the night before, there was too much work to do and it had been late before either of them had returned the their quarters to sleep, and, of course, their body clocks had them both up at 0500. It had been the same for a few night now and it was taking it's toll.

"Alright, it was good seeing you Thane. I wish the best for you." She settled for, aware that she couldn't say 'get well soon' like she had to Kaidan.

"And I for you, Siha." Garrus nodded to Thane as they entered the empty elevator.

"You were quiet in there." Jane murmured into his chest, despite the armour, as his arm around her waist kept her steady.

"I'd already spoken to Thane while you were speaking to Kaidan." He mumured back into her hair as he held her close.

"Since when have you two been so buddy-buddy?" Garrus shrugged at that.

"You told me to knock of the territorial crap so I did." She raised an eyebrow, although he couldn't see it.

"Just like that, huh?" He shrugged a little again.

"So, maybe it was easier after I told you that I was in love with you. Up until that point the fact that I didn't know exactly how you would feel about it had me a bit insecure." She shook her head at that.

"Baka. So, did you get dinner after all or did you spend the entire time talking to Thane about sniper mods?" She asked and he chuckled a little.

"Don't worry, I got it." He indicated to a paper bag in one of his hands as the elevator reached it's stop at the docking bay and they pulled away from each other a little. "And how did you know what we were talking about?" She shrugged.

"Simple process of elimination. It's something you're both passionate about, that you have in common. So, you weren't there for too long?" He shook his head.

"No, ani. It was just after I felt you panic. I knew that you didn't want me to intrude but I also didn't want to be too far away. You haven't panicked like that in a long time." She frowned a little at that. How long had it been? Probably since Nef's mother on Omega. It had been becoming more and more infrequent as she got older but she hadn't really noticed by just how much.

"Thanks Garrus. For being there."

"No problem, ani. So, does Kaidan know?" She nodded.

"He wouldn't take no for an answer so I told him I was married and then he wanted to know who to and it escalated from there. I don't think he's _happy_ but he's a good guy, if a bit of an idiot at times, so I don't think he'll do more than sulk." Garrus nodded at that.

"You know, we're still not technically married." She smiled, rolling her eyes.

"Okay, big guy. Next time we have a spare five minutes on a civilised world, we'll sign the papers. Alright? I'll even wear white, so long as it still has room to manoeuvre." He frowned a little.

"The human vids I watched all seemed to suggest it was a bit more... elaborate than that." She shrugged.

"It can be, but that's essentially just a big party. We're not party people Garrus... unless, you _want_ a big party." He shrugged and she sighed. "You want a proper wedding, don't you?" He sighed.

"I have all I want right here, ani. Although I must confess, I liked the idea of celebrating our love with our friends and family." She sighed.

"And here was me, liking the way turians just put their marks on each other in private with minimal fuss. If we're going to do this properly then we'll have to wait until this is all over." She warned him but he smiled.

"I can wait, ani. As long as you're okay with this. Because if not we'll get married on the next civilised planet we come across without telling anyone." She sighed, smiling.

"No, no. If we're going to do it, we might as well do it properly. Although no churches or poofy dresses. In fact, let's just get married on a beach or something. We'll still invite our family and friends but we'll at least have a good time. Or at least get a tan." She joked as they entered the Normandy. She figured having one more thing to fight for wasn't a bad idea...


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter 36**

"Hey James, Grissom sent out a distress call and we're answering it so I need you ready in twenty." Shepard called across the shuttle bay as she approached the weapons bench to install her newest shotgun mod, humming a little as she went.

"No problem, Lola." She frowned at that.

"Lola, huh?" He shrugged.

"Yeah. My best friend growing up had a sister called Lola. Older sister, hot." Shepard smiled, shaking her head.

"Right... Just don't let my 'man' hear you say that." She joked as James approached.

"Uh-huh, how is the Major?" Shepard rolled her eyes at that.

"Yeah, I've been meaning to tell you. Kaidan is nothing more than a friend." James gave her a look.

"Oh, come on. I could see the way he looked at you when he was on board." She sighed, shaking her head.

"That's his problem. _I_ was never interested." James raised an eyebrow at that.

"But you've been so happy since he woke up." Shepard shook her head again, still smiling.

"I think you've got your timings mixed up there." She said, still smiling as Garrus entered the Shuttle Bay and singing under her breath.

"_Love's gonna lose my head tonight,_  
_I can't stop it, I can't stop it,_  
_You just hang on and we'll be alright,_  
_You got it, you got it,_

_I don't know what tomorrow brings,_  
_I don't know much 'bout anything,_  
_Love's gonna lose my head tonight,_  
_I can't stop it, I can't stop it._"

* * *

"Jack?!" Shepard exclaimed as she pulled her sword from the last Cerberus trooper. Jack jumped down and smacked her right across the face. She put her hand on Garrus' chest as she heard him growl a little.

"Nice to see you too, Jack." She said as she rubbed her jaw.

"How many times did I tell you not to trust Cerberus?" Jack asked and Shepard sighed.

"About as many times as I told you that I _didn't _trust them." Jack nodded, still upset as James approached and Garrus stood down.

"Nice to see you that you're as pleasant as always, Jack." Garrus quipped and the biotic frowned at him.

"Bite me, Garrus. Or, better yet, bite her. That's probably how she likes it." Jack grinned and Shepard laughed as Garrus looked a little flustered.

"Oh, Jack. I've missed you." She said, smiling and shaking her head.

"You too, I guess. It was nice not being the craziest person around for once. Sorry I snapped, it's just that with Cerberus after my kids..." Shepard nodded.

"I get it Jack. Look at you, you've gone all respectable on me. First Garrus, now you, I get locked up for a few months and you guys all turn into model citizens." She joked, shaking her head.

"I always said you were a bad influence, ani." Garrus joked and she smiled and Jack shook her head.

"God, you two are still sickening." Jack said, pulling a face. Shepard just laughed.

"You realise that you're partially to blame for this? What was it you said again? Something about turians being 'good fucks'?" Jack just shook her head.

"Yeah, I said f- screw 'em, not marry 'em. Even I'm not that crazy." Shepard grinned at that, glad to have found her friend again.

"Yeah, yeah. Anyway, we'd better find a way out, we can catch up later." Jack nodded.

"Yeah, I'm not letting those Cerberus motherf- idiots get my kids. Is your guy going to be alright?" Shepard turned to where Jack was indicating and remembered that James was there, causing her to blush a little and look sheepish.

"Wow, we are the worst at keeping secrets." She said, turning to Garrus who just shrugged.

"I thought we'd figured that out when everyone caught onto us before even we did." He replied and she smiled.

"Yeah, I guess." She turned to James. "Are you going to be okay or have we broke you?" James just shook his head at that.

"Damn Lola, it didn't even occur to me..." She nodded, still smiling.

"That was sort of the point. I'm not a big fan of everyone knowing my business, especially not since all of the hype I got after Elysium." James nodded at that.

"I guess after every tabloid in council and alliance space looked into your life for months on end, you'd have a different idea of privacy." She nodded and Garrus frowned a little.

"Pretty much. I _really_ don't like people knowing stuff about me. So, can you not tell everyone about this?" He nodded.

"Sure. Just one thing?" He asked and she gave him a questioning look but nodded.

"Yeah, sure." She said.

"All those times someone tried to get a hold of you and EDI said you were in the Main Battery..." She blushed a little.

"I was helping calibrate the main gun." She said, her expression completely deadpan and her voice neutral but her slight blush gave her away. Her mouth twitched a little as he narrowed his eyes.

"Okay, shouldn't have asked..." She laughed a little and Garrus laughed with her as they went to investigate ways to open the doors.

* * *

"So, do you think James will keep quiet?" Garrus asked her once they were finally alone in their quarters, late into the night cycle. She snorted in response.

"No. I give it a week before everyone on the ship knows." She said, smiling as she removed her bobble.

"So, why did you ask him to keep it a secret in the first place?" He asked and she shrugged.

"Because it bought us a week. Hopefully by that point we'll be too busy with negotiations that no one will really notice." She smiled a little but he pulled her close as he felt her mind wander to the up-coming negotiations and her sub-harmonics trilled in thanks.

"So, what was all that stuff James said about Elysium? You've never mentioned any of it..." She bit her lip, frowning a little.

"I guess I'm just used to everyone already knowing when they meet me." She said shrugging, still biting her lip. He frowned a little.

"So..." She sighed.

"There was a big fuss after Elysium and the Alliance brass decided that I would make a good walking advertisement for them." He gave her a confused look at that.

"Had they met you?" He asked incredulously and she shook her head, sighing.

"Nope. That was the problem. I guess I could have made a bigger deal about it but you know me, I don't like to admit that I can't so something and I hate speaking up for myself so I let them put me in uncomfortable situations like parties and stuff. It didn't last too long before they twigged that I wasn't the best for the part but the media had already noticed me and for whatever reason they got their knickers in a twist about finding out more about the mysterious Lieutenant Shepard. Up until that point no one had ever paid any kind of attention to me so all kinds of crazy made-up shit was said about me. And then some of the crew talked to the tabloids and they picked up on some more accurate things, like my love of old sci-fi. They didn't get much because I didn't interact much with the crew but it was... weird. I preferred it when they got everything wrong. I didn't like strangers knowing things about me, I wasn't even used to people I knew knowing much about me. So now I'm careful to keep the things that mean the most to me away from everyone else." She said, shrugging.

"So, that's why you don't want anyone you don't trust knowing about us?" She nodded a little.

"God, that sounds so awful. Like I'm ashamed of you, but I'm _not_. I just... Garrus, you are my one weakness. I've always been detached from everything and everyone but not you. I've kept up the idea of 'Commander Shepard' in the eyes of people who don't know me because I see the power in that idea. It's a symbol of hope and has been since Elysium. 'Commander Shepard' can withstand anything and has no weakness. Jane, on the other hand, is shy and awkward and hopelessly in love with a cocky turian." She smiled, wrapping her arms around his neck as she said the last part and he nodded.

"I guess this cocky turian doesn't fit in with your image, huh?" She shrugged a little.

"Honestly, I have no clue. I don't even know how 'Commander Shepard' became so effective and I just don't really want to mess with it. If it ain't broke..." He frowned a little at that and she smiled, shaking her head a little. "It's a human saying. 'If it ain't broke, don't fix it'. Maybe 'Commander Shepard' would benefit from a bad-ass vigilante ex-cop by her side. I know I do..." He nodded at that.

"You know people are going to find out eventually?" She nodded.

"Yeah, yeah. And then everyone will want to know about the first celebrity human-turian couple. I just want to enjoy the quiet while it lasts." He nodded.

"I completely agree, ani."


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter 37**

"Well, that went better than expected." Shepard admitted as she, Wrex and Victus watched the salarian dalatrass leave.

"How?" Victus asked, a little disbelieveing and she shrugged.

"I didn't have to shoot anyone." Wrex laughed at that, shaking his head.

"I've missed you, Shepard. Things almost got boring without you around." She grinned at that.

"Yeah, God forbid I should get a moment of peace." She joked, rolling her eyes. "Now, let's go get these females of yours."

"I assume the kid's coming with." Wrex said, still smiling and Shepard shook her head a little, smiling back.

"How'd you even know he was on board?" Wrex laughed at that.

"Because you didn't shoot anyone. When blood tied are sepearated they have a tendancy to go all Blood Rage more than usual." Sheaprd laughed, shaking her head.

"Thanks for the heads up, Wrex." She joked and he grinned back.

"No problem, Shepard." She rolled her eyes as they left the room, headed once more into the battlefield.

* * *

"Hey, Mordin." Shepard grinned as she entered the med-bay.

"Shepard. Good to see you. I was just telling Eve about Garrus. Scars considered attractive by female krogan." Shepard raised an eyebrow at that.

"Well, it's good to see your sense of humour hasn't changed." Shepard said, shaking her head. "I've missed you. I need someone to talk science with." Mordin smiled at that.

"Yes. Nice being back at STG but no one quite as fast as you with equations. Or as good at crazy ideas." Shepard shrugged, grinning.

"It's what I do. If you need any help in here, biological promlems would be a welcome change to tactical ones." Mordin nodded.

"Always good to work with you, Shepard. Missed working on our projects." She nodded at that.

"Yeah, I guess there's not much left to modify in terms of my cybernetics, huh?" Mordin shook his head.

"Untrue. Have been working on one last modification." She frowned a little.

"Really? What's this one going to do, make me see in the dark?" Mordin frowned for a moment before answering.

"Second last modification, then." She grinned as he scanned her with his omni-tool.

"Okay, so what does it do?" He shook his head.

"It needs time to adjust your bio-chemistry. Changes won't be significant for a few months." She frowned at that.

"Okay, but that doesn't tell me what those changes will be." Mordin frowned at that.

"Unsure that changes will take affect. Do not wish to get your hopes up." She sighed at that.

"So what you're saying is that you're doing something to my cybernetics and whatever it is will significantly alter my bio-chemistry in some way but you won't tell me what it is?" He nodded.

"Will find out if it works. If not, then no harm done." She sighed again.

"Mordin, I hate surprises." He nodded.

"Understandable. But ask for your trust, Shepard. Don't want to make promises I can't keep." She nodded.

"Fine, but if it was anyone else..."

"If it was anyone else, you wouldn't let them near your cybernetics." She smiled, nodding.

"I guess not. Can you continue to make these adjustments while I talk to Eve?" Mordin nodded.

"Yes, most can be done remotely as long as you stay in the med-bay. Can call you over for any injections. Shouldn't take too long." She nodded, making her way over to the female krogan.

"Thank you for saving my life, Commander. I didn't think the krogan had any allies left in the galaxy." Eve said as she approached and Shepard shrugged.

"We owe a lot to you, even if most people have forgotten that." It had always bugged her that everyone chose to see the negatives of the krogan over the positives. She knew all too well that people only saw what they wanted to see but it still baffled her that they could be so blind.

"They can be forgiven. Our actions have hardly inspired friendship." Shepard smiled a little at that, realising that it was exactly what she would say in Eve's position.

"Part of being friends is knowing each other's name. I feel bad that I don't know yours." Eve nodded at that.

"I surrendered it the day I became a shaman of the female clan. I belong to my sisters now. But perhaps one day, when this is over, you can know it." Shepard nodded at that.

"I'd like that. So, if you're a shaman did you have to undergo the ritual where you're locked in a cave?" Eve frowned at that.

"Yes, although I must confess that I am surprised by your knowledge. Most outsiders know nothing about krogan culture." Shepard smiled a little at that, shaking her head.

"Yeah, well between Grunt acting out and Wrex catching me out with the whole blood tied thing I decided it might be a good idea to look into it." Eve nodded in understanding.

"I noticed the connection between you and the turian. Garrus, right?" She nodded.

"Yeah. Wrex noticed back on the SR1 but he failed to mention the specifics. I'm usually more reliant on science than legends but there's definitely something measurable between us." Eve nodded at that.

"Legends are often borne of fact. It was thought that the blood tied was an evolutionary advantage to ensure strong offspring. Children of blood tied were often great warriors." Shepard raised an eyebrow at that.

"Well, that's clearly not true. At least not with Garrus and I." She tried to keep her voice steady as Eve observed her carefully. She avoided the subject of children. She wasn't even sure she'd make it to her next birthday with this war, so while it was nice to plan a crazy future with Garrus where they disappeared off in the Normandy and went on adventures, she couldn't let it get too real. She refused to hope for a future that would likely never come. So, there was no point in focusing on irrelevant problems.

"Do you know why the blood tied fell into legend?" Shepard shook her head.

"I assumed it was because it wasn't common." Eve nodded.

"It used to be but not since before the genophage. Until you two." Shepard shrugged at that.

"Maybe once the genophage is cured, it'll become common again." She suggested and Eve shrugged.

"Perhaps."

* * *

Garrus needed a break from numbers. He sighed as he headed out of the Main Battery, thinking enviously of how easily Jane handled numbers to find the tactical advantage. Of course, she hated the reality of the ruthless calculus, the people being condemned so that others could live, and he had to admit that it wasn't any easier for him. So he decided that he needed a drink. He was going to find his bondmate but she was in the middle of talking to the female krogan and catching up with Mordin. The thought of the salarian's fast paced chatter made his head ache so he decided to leave her to it, knowing that she would catch up with him once she was done.

Garrus entered the lounge to find Victus already there.

"Garrus." Victus said as Garrus got himself a dextro beer.

"Primarch. You get sick of staring at numbers too?" The primarch nodded as Garrus sat next to him.

"Yeah, you reach a point at which you can't do any more and it's infuriating." Garrus's sub-harmonics trilled in agreement as he drank his drink.

"I know what you mean..." Victus nodded.

"You seem better since you came back on board the Normandy." He observed as Garrus looked a little sheepish.

"Well, it's my home. Has been since I helped Shepard chase down Saren. I guess it's just nice to be back." His fingers subconsciously brushed his bondmark and Victus snorted.

"Right, you sure it's the place and not the woman?" Garrus just gave him a blank look. "Garrus, it was clear that you were suffering from separation from your bondmate and the second Shepard showed up, you were fine. Not to mention she has bondmarks on her neck." Garrus sighed at that.

"So much for Shepard's 'we have a week' theory." He said and Victus looked confused. "Vega figured it out a few days ago. Shepard reckoned we had a week before he told everyone aboard." Victus nodded at that.

"You know that the entire galaxy is looking to her right now? A human-turian relationship would be news at the best of times." Garrus sighed again, nodding. He'd never dealt with other people paying attention to him. Hell, on Omega no one outside of his team even knew who he was.

"We figure that with the war there will be more important stuff for them to report on." Victus nodded at that.

"Good luck with that. You two are good together, in spite of the obvious. Though I imagine your father didn't take it well." Garrus nodded.

"You know what he's like but... he knows how stupid it is to try to separate bondmates so he's not threatening to disown me or anything. I, uh... I haven't heard from him or Sol since the Reapers hit..." Victus nodded, his own eyes darkening.

"In this war, knowing isn't much better. No where is safe, at least not for long." Garrus sighed in agreement.

"Yeah. I know Shepard isn't looking into where her parents are stationed. She knows that she'll be alerted if anything happens to them but she says that knowing anything else would just make her stress about them and distract her. I guess this war is taking it's toll on everyone."

"That it is..."


	38. Chapter 38

**AN: So, the last few chapters have been short, mostly because I didn't really have any ideas as to how it should differ enough from the game to create original story (it's a bit pointless for me to just reiterate what's already in the game) but I took a short break this morning to focus on my art (GohokeKitty on DeviantArt) and then tonight I had enough inspiration to plan out the rest of this story right until the end. It comes out at around sixty chapters, going into post-Reapers territory. Plus I have a sequel planned so Jane and Garrus are going to stick around for a while yet and it's going to be a hell of a ride.**

**Since I'm here anyway, quick thanks to everyone who reads this (especially for reading this far!) and a special shout out to everyone who has followed, favourited and reviewed! All of you guys rock!**

**So, on with the story.**

* * *

**Chapter 38**

"Enough! Both of you!" Shepard stood between Wrex and Victus, her biotics flickering just enough to give warning as she glared at them. Her tone was stern and she glared at them with that dark fire in her eyes that only a truly unstable person would mess with. "Victus, Wrex has a point. The bomb was a shitty decision but Wrex, it wasn't _his_. This thing has been on Tuchanka for generations and his son just died making it right." Wrex nodded, still angry but seeing her point.

"If you were anyone else, Shepard." He warned and she simply kept her gaze steadily on him.

"Good thing I'm not, then." He grunted and moved away. Shepard sighed, allowing her biotics to dissipate as she turned to Victus with sympathetic eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Victus." He shook his head, as if shaking off her sympathy.

"He did me proud, Shepard. I just hope he knows that." She nodded and moved away. There was nothing else to say, no words to make it better. She headed to the galaxy map and sighed as she prioritised their next few missions. She had already dealt with the Cerberus presence on Tuchanka but Aria had contacted her about an interesting proposal. Something about uniting the merc gangs...

"EDI, let's head to the Attican Traverse next. Last thing we need is Rachni popping up all over the place." She spoke aloud, not bothering to walk up to the cockpit to chat with her new body. She often did out of courtesy but she was too tired and knew that Garrus had just finished with his work for the night. She was about to leave when Traynor interrupted her.

"Commander, do you have a moment?" Shepard sighed a little but smiled as she approached Traynor. She liked the girl, she knew what she was doing and he occasional lack of self-confidence was endearing and reminded Shepard of herself.

"Sure, Traynor. What do you need?" Traynor looked a little awkward at that.

"I don't mean to sound impertinent but... there have been rumours on board that you and Vakarian are together." Shepard sighed visibly at that, shaking her head a little. Between James and Victus finding out, Liara and Mordin and Joker and EDI already knowing and Javik using his Prothean psychic powers it was surprising that they hadn't been outed to the entire crew before. That didn't make it any less awkward.

"Yes Traynor, he's my bondmate. Is there a specific reason you're bringing it up?" Traynor looked a little awkward again.

"Well, Allers was saying that while she's reporting the war and not idle gossip, there are reporters interested in 'human interest' pieces. She mentioned it to one or two crew members who asked about it and they seem to have gotten it into their heads that they can make some credits from gossip about you two. I was thinking that I could block all communications to news networks with the exception of Allers. It won't stop them but it should slow the news down." Shepard smiled, laughing a little under her breath.

"Traynor, you're the best. That would be perfect, as long as it doesn't interfere with other communications or bother you too much." The specialist shook her head.

"It's no problem, Commander. Aside from a couple of idiots the crew understands and respects your privacy." She smiled, pausing for a second before folding her arms and moving onto the question she'd been wondering since Shepard had said it. "So, bondmate is the turian equivalent of husband, right?" Shepard shrugged.

"Close enough. Mates are like husband and wife and bondmates are like fairytale lovers where everything is epic and 'happily ever after'." Traynor smiled, shaking her head a little.

"Figures." Shepard bit her lip a little. She thought Joker had been teasing when he had said that Traynor had a crush on her.

"Thanks for the assist, Traynor. I owe you a drink next time we're on the Citadel. I'll even be your wing-woman." Traynor grinned at that.

"Alright then, Shepard. You're on." Shepard grinned back as she headed into the lift and to her quarters.

* * *

"Grunt!" She cried happily, Garrus grinning and shaking his head behind her at her excitement.

"Shepard! Ha! So, did those idiots finally realise they were wrong and let you out?" Shepard shook her head, grinning.

"Not exactly but you know the galaxy, if I'm not around to save it everything falls apart." She joked and the krogan laughed.

"I've missed you Shepard, not enough explosions without you around." Shepard laughed at that.

"Well, I'm here now so that problem should solve itself. Look at you, Grunt. You're all grown up. I need to stop losing time to death and prison and the like. It's becoming ridiculous."

* * *

Garrus watched as Shepard bit her lip so hard that it bled as they headed back towards the shuttle. She had always been detached and pragmatic in the past so losing people had never been a problem. This was different. This was a family member and she had made the decision that had lead to this situation. He tried to alleviate her guilt through their bond but she was having none of it, pushing him out so that she could allow the feelings within her to consume her, if only for a few moments before she steeled herself against it all again. She knew the risks of having friends and caring about people after Ashley's death ans she had decided that it was worth it but at that second, she was questioning her judgement. She turned to see the emptiness left by the young krogan one last time before boarding the shuttle, only to find, instead of emptiness, a blood-stained krogan limping towards them.

"Grunt!" She cried, running towards him.

"Anybody got something to eat?" He managed before collapsing as Shepard held him up. Garrus moved to help her support him as they moved back towards the shuttle. EDI approached and relieved Shepard of her burden so that she could scan Grunt for injuries with her omni-tool as they loaded him onto the shuttle and took off.

"Most of this blood isn't his but he is injured. He's regenerating, though. He'll be fine, just needs to eat and let himself heal." Shepard said aloud, mostly for herself as Grunt had lost consciousness, EDI already knew what she was saying and Garrus was more worried for her. Grunt was tough and Garrus had no doubt that the tank-bred krogan would make a full recovery but he worried that Jane was letting her emotions overwhelm her.

"Of course he'll be fine, Jane. You taught him well." Garrus said, putting his arms around his bondmate as EDI looked at them questioningly.

"Shepard, I have a question about human behaviour." Shepard smiled, shaking her head as relief swept through her. Garrus worried what she would be like when the inevitable happened and they lost someone. He knew that Commander Shepard would remain strong and continue on with their mission but he wondered what the cost would be to Jane.

"Go ahead, EDI." The AI nodded as Shepard sat next to Garrus.

"I have observed that your behaviour towards certain crew members such as Grunt, Jack and Jeff is similar to the behaviour displayed by parents towards children. I have also noted the behaviour in Doctor Chakwas towards even more crew members. I find it puzzling..." Shepard blushed at that, biting her lip.

"Well, I guess I think of all of the crew as my family and so I guess the crew all sort of fit into familial roles if you look closely enough. Grunt is, technically, a kid so I guess I treat him like one, Jack reminds me of a young me so I guess that's why I act that way towards her and Joker acts like a kid most of the time. He's like an annoying little brother." Her mouth twitched into a bittersweet smile as memories of her cousin James came to the surface and Garrus held her tighter.

"So you're saying that certain characteristics in those closest to you trigger maternal instincts?" Shepard cringed a little, bringing her knees up to her chest.

"I guess. Can we just stop talking about it?" EDI nodded.

"I'm sorry, I did not mean to make you uncomfortable." She said and Shepard just smiled.

"It's okay, just don't tell Joker that I think of him as a kid brother. I'll never hear the end of it." She joked and Garrus brought his forehead to hers, causing her to sigh.

"Want to tell me what's wrong, ani? You've been shutting a lot of people down when they try to talk to you lately." She squirmed a little at that, looking awkward.

"I guess curing the genophage has everyone thinking about kids." Garrus let his gaze fall as he realised just what was making her uncomfortable.

"It's upsetting you because we... because humans and turians can't-" He rambled a bit but she cut him off.

"Well, my mom said no kids until I'm thirty. It's one of her Rules. So, it's not a problem yet." He just gave her a look.

"Even going by your whole 'two-years-dead-don't-count' thing, you had a birthday while you were locked up so you are technically thirty." She frowned a little.

"And here was me thinking you'd missed that. Why didn't you say anything?" He smiled at that.

"Because you hate your birthday. For you, it's an excuse to eat cake and get drunk, nothing more. And you don't need an excuse for that." She grinned at him.

"You know me too well." He smiled back, his eyes filled with worry.

"Enough to know that you're avoiding the subject." She sighed at that, placing her hand on his.

"Garrus, I meant what I said when we met Kara. We'll figure it out when the time comes but right now we're in the middle of a war. I just... I don't need it drilled into me every five minutes." She sighed and he nodded.

"Still not wishing you'd fallen for a nice human guy?" She shook her head, smiling.

"Not even a little, ani. You?" She barely ever called him ani and he felt as if every molecule in his body reacted when she did.

"Never." He managed as she touched her forehead to his.

* * *

"So, the entire crew is headed to Purgatory because..." Garrus started as they left the Normandy.

"Because I need to speak with Aria and Joker is the king of questionable ideas." He laughed as they headed towards the lift.

"So, what does the Queen of Omega want with us and why is she here?" Shepard shrugged at that as she keyed in their destination.

"She seems to think she can help out and I figure Aria's not a bad ally to have." Garrus growled a little in disagreement and she laughed a little. "Well, that's why I'm bringing Archangel with me." She said, pulling him close as if for a kiss when the elevator doors opened.

"Dammit. Why did they make the lifts here faster just as I got someone to enjoy the ride with?" He laughed at that as they headed towards the club, disregarding the funny looks they got from everyone except the asari. They figured if their privacy was screwed anyway, they might as well enjoy it.

"So, what's the plan here? Do you talk with Aria while I look intimidating?" She grinned at that.

"Sounds good. You do dangerously sexy well, you know." She said, pulling him close to quickly kiss him before they headed into the club, earning them a few glares.

They approached cautiously, watching as a C-Sec officer tried to deal with Aria. It was amusing to watch and Garrus shook his head a little as his bondmate grinned.

"Enjoy the show, Shepard?" She kept grinning as she sat next to Aria.

"I guess there's one rule on the Citadel, huh?" She joked and Aria nodded.

"I guess so. I hate this place, so sickeningly uptight." Shepard raised an eyebrow at that.

"Then why are you here?" Aria stood up, starting to pace and Shepard quickly looked to Garrus who was still standing just beside her, managing to look badass without much effort.

"Cerberus stole Omega from me. The Illusive Man is now squarely at the top of my shit list. He will pay for every second I've spent in this bureaucratic hellhole." Shepard nodded at that, smirking a little.

"Join the club." Aria turned to face her, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, that's exactly why you're here. I've managed to talk the leaders of the Blood Pack, Blue Suns and Eclipse into following my rule but I need you to close the deals." Garrus growled at that.

"We don't need help from scum like that." He spoke up and Aria shrugged.

"You would say that, Archangel. The fact remains that they're out there anyway and war time makes criminal activity much easier. Under my rule their guns would be pointed at the Reapers, not you." Shepard shook her head a little.

"Even if we agreed, I'm hardly one for diplomacy." Aria nodded.

"Yes but it's not diplomacy I need. They need to know I'm serious, I figure Commander Shepard will convince them. And if you want to take your vigilante boyfriend with you, it'll only help to keep them in line." Shepard sighed, biting her lip a little.

"I'll think about it." Aria nodded.

"Once you've decided, talk to my guy at the bar. You can't miss the sleazy ass." Shepard nodded as she got up with Garrus in tow.

"So, you don't like this, do you?" Shepard asked him and his sub-harmonics rumbled with frustration.

"No. But Aria has a point. It's not as if I can hunt them all down any more so having Aria keep them in line seems like the next best thing." He admitted, reluctantly and she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him in for a kiss. After a few moments she pulled away grinning and he couldn't help but grin back.

"I promise as soon as this war is over, we'll take the Normandy and hunt down all the merc gangs you want." Garrus grinned at that, lowering his forehead to hers.

"I thought we were going to get married after the war." She shrugged.

"Think of it as our honeymoon. Anyway, I'd better talk to Aria's guy. Can you pop upstairs and tell any of our crew up there that we'll be docked until noon tomorrow? If they want to get pissed then we should let them." He nodded, pulling away from her and she headed towards the lower bar where Joker was sitting.

"Having fun, Joker?" He shook his head.

"Not yet. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that." Shepard laughed, shaking her head as she heard someone call her name across the bar.

"Jane!" She frowned and her eyes found a human man who seemed very familiar, although she couldn't put her finger on it.

"Yeah?" She asked as he approached and he grinned.

"Damn Jane, look at you. You got all sexy." She frowned at the blonde man whose grey-blue eyes were wandering her form. She wished for a moment that her jeans and vest weren't so tight until she finally recognised his voice.

"Look who's talking! It's like you replaced all of your fat with muscle, Daniel." He laughed at that before giving her a look that she figured would probably set most girls' panties on fire. But she wasn't most girls.

"So, how about you ditch your boyfriend here and we catch up. For old times sake." He said suggestively and she folded her arms.

"Daniel, this is my pilot Joker. Joker, this is Daniel, the worst Spanish student I ever tutored." Joker nodded to him and Daniel raised an eyebrow.

"'Worst' is probably a little harsh." She shook her head.

"You didn't know what 'holla' meant." She pointed out and he smiled.

"Fine, fine. Now, if he's not your boyfriend, how about my offer?" She just smiled.

"Joker's not my boyfriend. See that turian in the heavy armour with the rifle and blue clan markings?" Daniel frowned as he watched Garrus walk down from the upper bar.

"Yeah?" She grinned.

"_He's_ my boyfriend." She watched Daniel's shocked face as she sat the smugly. She always loved messing with him.

"Does this mean you're not introducing him as your husband until after you've had a proper wedding?" Joker asked and she sighed.

"Boyfriend, bondmate, fiancée, husband... does it really matter?" She asked, turning her attention back to Daniel. "Dan, you look like a fish." He shut his mouth that had been hanging open and he frowned a little.

"Wait, I recognise that guy... Is that _Archangel_?" She raised an eyebrow at that.

"I guess that makes you Aria's guy, then. " He nodded.

"Yeah. After... well, I didn't like the idea of foster homes and it turns out that while I'm not talented with much else, I know how to hold a gun." They stood a little awkwardly, neither wanting to remember Mindoir. "I... I wanted to say that I was sorry. And thanks. I always said that if I ever saw you again I'd thank you for helping me with my work when you didn't have to." She shrugged.

"You were the only person who wasn't mean to me. Other than being a complete ass, of course, but that's just _you_." She joked and he laughed as Garrus approached.

"Hey Jane, who's your friend?" He stood next to her and she leant into him a little.

"This is Aria's guy, Daniel. The biggest ass I've ever known and good for nothing unless you need a walking Pokemon guide." Garrus gave her a questioning look.

"Pokemon?" She smiled.

"An omni-tool game. Daniel went to school on Mindoir and I ended up tutoring him in Spanish. Those lessons often devolved into which starter pokemon is better or which bands were better." Daniel pulled a face at that.

"You were too into all of those singer/songwriter women. Too girly for me." She narrowed her eyes at him.

"Yeah, yeah." She said, rolling her eyes and Daniel gave Garrus a look.

"So, how long have you been into turians, Jane? Had I known, I wouldn't have taken it personally when you kissed and ran." She rolled her eyes again, shaking her head.

"Actually it was right after I kissed you. You were so awful that it put me off humans forever." She joked and he frowned at her, mockingly.

"I'm wounded. Really." He said sarcastically and she laughed, shaking her head.

"Okay, so give me the intel so that me and my dangerously sexy bondmate can go and deal with them." He sighed jokingly as he brought up his omni-tool.

"It's always work with you. You know, I could never distract her for more than five minutes at a time." He said to Garrus but Jane just smirked.

"You don't have Garrus's distracting skills." She joked and he raised an eyebrow.

"Apparently not. Okay, the Eclipse leader, Jona Sederis, is currently locked up. We've worked on getting her released but Bailey is being stubborn so you'll have to use your 'teacher's pet' routine on him." He said, reading from his omni-tool.

"I didn't have a 'routine'." She pouted and he just grinned, turning to Garrus.

"None of the teachers really knew who she was so when she talked to them about anything she acted like a swot and they figured she was the quiet hard-working type so they never gave her any bother. The amount of homework she got out of... And she was only in school for a couple of months every year!" Garrus grinned at that.

"Yeah, that sounds about right." She pulled a face.

"Well, it's better than getting a reputation as a troublemaker. You know, I got _warned_ about you when I recruited you, Garrus." He gave her a questioning look.

"You never told me that." She shrugged a little.

"Yeah, well, all it did was make me like you more." She admitted and he grinned.

"God, you two are so... nauseating. Okay, for the Blood Pack, you need to speak to our guy Narl. We've got a plan in place to remove their leader with our guy, he'll fill you in once you get there. As for the Blue Suns, Vosque wants a favour and he's a total jerk." She raised an eyebrow.

"So, why aren't you two the best of friends?" He shrugged.

"Hey, I'm just a bit of an ass, not a complete douche." She nodded, raising her eyebrow again.

"Uh-huh. Well, thanks for the info. It's... It's nice to know that some things don't change." She admitted and he nodded.

"Yeah. You're not the same awkward, shy girl who left Mindoir, are you?" She shook her head.

"Something tells me that the sleazy ass thing is just an act. I guess pretending to be who you were before is better than admitting how badly what happened hurt you, huh?" He took a deep breath and nodded.

"Maybe. Maybe some things are just hard-wired. Take care of her, Archangel. I've lost enough childhood friends..." Garrus nodded at that and they left the bar.

"I'm sorry if you got cut out of that conversation a bit, Garrus." She said as they headed out of the club.

"No problem, ani. I'm guessing you haven't seen him since..." She nodded.

"He was the only person who didn't treat me like I was invisible or a freak on Mindoir. He was a total jerk and couldn't go five minutes without making a sexist comment but... it was never malicious, you know? He didn't mean it, it was just how he coped with the bullying. Anyway, I kissed him that last summer on Mindoir and then I didn't talk to him again before... After that I didn't know if he was alive or dead and I never really looked into it. I guess he made his way to Omega." Garrus held her tight as she allowed the memories to envelop her for a moment. "It's weird to think about it... me before I met you. Doesn't quite seem like me..." She shook her head, smiling a little.

"Same. I'm pretty sure me before I met you wouldn't have ever dreamt of going vigilante. So, let's go deal with some merc gangs. Archangel and Phoenix style." He said and she grinned, nodding and putting thoughts of Daniel and the past back where they belonged; in the past.

* * *

"You can come out now, Kasumi." Shepard called and Garrus gave her a questioning look.

"How'd you know?" The thief asked as she de-cloaked and Shepard just grinned.

"Lucky guess." She said and Kasumi shook her head.

"Well, lucky guess or no I'm not coming with you. It kind of defeats the point of disappearing forever." Shepard grinned at that.

"Oh trust me, I understand completely." Garrus laughed a little at that.

"Yeah, she's still trying to figure out how we're going to disappear with the Normandy after we've taken care of the Reapers." Shepard shrugged at that.

"Hey, gotta have a retirement plan" She reasoned and he laughed.

"Don't suppose I could talk you into a house on the beach somewhere?" She shrugged again.

"Maybe as a summer home." She joked and Kasumi shook her head.

"You two are sweet but I'm off. Send me an invite to the wedding, though. I might even show up. No promises, though." Shepard sighed at that.

"Kasumi, the Crucible project could use your skills." The thief sighed at that.

"I'm not a scientist, Shepard." She pointed out and Shepard sighed in response.

"Come on, Kasumi. They're going to need hard to come by resources. Plus, once it's over it's not like they're going to be checking pockets or anything." The thief nodded at that.

"You say the nicest things, Shep. Fine, I'll go." Shepard nodded as her friend headed off before turning to Garrus.

"Come on, we've got about half an hour to kill before Gabby and Ken show up." Garrus gave her a questioning look.

"The two engineers from the SR2?" She nodded.

"Yeah, turns out they were still being held for working with Cerberus. I used my authorisation to have them released when I was in the Spectre Office. Now, come on, Kara was messaging me about making a chocolate fudge cake yesterday..."


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter 39**

"Go! Get back to the truck! I'll take care of the cure!" Shepard yelled and Garrus growled loud enough for it to be audible over the hammers.

"Shepard-" He started but she interrupted him with her Commander Shepard glare.

"That's an order, Garrus!" He knew that questioning her orders would do no good, that sometimes she would put herself in harms way and there was nothing he could do about it, but knowing didn't make it any easier. Didn't make leaving his bondmate feel any less wrong.

_I know ani, but please just go..._ He heard her voice in his head as if she has whispered in his ear, the pleading slipping through the glare in her eyes. He took a deep breath and nodded, running off with Javik as Shepard headed towards the Shroud, avoiding the battling Reaper and Thresher Maw as she went.

"Mordin, is the cure ready?" She asked as she approached.

"Yes. Cure loaded and dispersal in two minutes. Procedure traumatic for Eve but not lethal. Maelon's research invaluable." He said, even more hurriedly than usual.

"She's okay?" Shepard asked and he nodded.

"Headed to safety now. Her survival fortunate. Will stabilise new government should Wrex get any ideas. Good match. Promising future for krogan." A piece of building fell close by and Shepard jumped.

"Damn." She said, wondering how much longer the structure would hold.

"Control room at top of Shroud tower. Must take elevator up." Shepard looked at him incredulously.

"You're going up there, aren't you?" She asked and he nodded.

"Yes, manual access required to counteract STG sabotage. Make sure cure dispersed properly." She frowned, running through all of the other options in her head. None of them were viable.

"I- There must be some other option!" She cried with frustration but he shook his head.

"No. We both know there is no other option. Not coming back. Suggest you get clear. Explosion likely to be... problematic." She shook her head with disbelief as he headed towards the elevator.

"Mordin, no!" She said and he sighed.

"Shepard, please. I have to do this. My project, my work, my cure. My responsibility. Would have liked to have run tests on seashells." He paused for a moment before smiling in a bittersweet way. "Would have also liked to be there to see if latest modification to implants works." She sighed, smiling a watery smile.

"I guess you're still not going to tell me what the modification is, huh?" He shook his head.

"Don't want to make promises I can't keep. Will find out soon enough. Also..." He waved his omni-tool over her eyes. "Last modification. As promised." She smiled but it wavered as she held back tears.

"Thank you, Mordin. And... I'm sorry." She said, lamely. There wasn't much else she could say.

"I'm not. Had to be me. Someone else might have gotten it wrong." Shepard smiled at that as the elevator carried her crazy scientist friend to his death.

She knew that she couldn't stay so she headed away from the Shroud, biting her lip and tasting blood. She stumbled as the explosion sounded and she focused on calming herself as she watched the golden flakes of hope descend across the Tuchanka landscape.

Before she realised it, a pair of turian arms were wrapped around her and she smiled weakly.

"He didn't... he didn't make it." She managed, refusing to cry in front of everyone as Wrex and Eve stepped out of the truck.

"He will be remembered as a hero, Shepard." Wrex said as he approached and she nodded. She wondered what the dead cared about remembering but she kept her mouth shut. If others found comfort in their platitudes, who was she to take it from them. So she simply nodded.

"The genophage reduced us to animals, but you changed that today Shepard." Wrex told her and she nodded again, sealing away her emotions.

"Now we will fight for our children, not against them. It's just a pity Mordin had to die." Shepard kept nodding, her emotions held back so that she could answer.

"He wouldn't have had it any other way. And I'm sure where ever he is, he's putting in a good word for us." Wrex gave her a questioning look.

"Thought you didn't believe in that crap, Shepard." She smiled weakly.

"I don't. Even if I am blood tied." Wrex shook his head, smiling as Garrus kept his arm around her and Eve stepped forward.

"But we can thank you two in person, Commander. Thanks to you children will once again be a common sight on Tuchanka. Maybe that is the reason you were blood tied." Shepard bit her lip again and tasted fresh blood in her mouth before nodding.

"Tell the turians I will be deploying troops to Palaven immediately and when you're ready to kick the Reapers off Earth, you let me know. The krogan are back in business." Shepard smiled at that. As much as she missed her friend, the wave of sadness was eased by the knowledge that Mordin had known what he was fighting for. To give the krogan hope once more. He had decided that it was worth the sacrifice and she decided that she would respect his decision.

"Goodbye Commander." Eve said and Shepard smiled her first genuine smile since Mordin had entered the lift.

"What will you do now?" She asked them.

"Spread the hope you've given us. Even now there are clans gathering in the Kelphic Valley. I'll go speak to them and make sure that this gift isn't squandered. Thank you, for all that you have done and know that Urdnot Bakara calls you a friend."

* * *

The computer terminal in the med-bay beeped harshly once again.

"Damn it! Bosh'tet!" Shepard yelled as she hit the side of the terminal. She bit her lip again, knowing that she shouldn't as the familiar copper taste of blood filled her mouth, but doing it anyway. At that point she heard a voice at the door.

"I don't think that's going to help." Garrus said, causing her to spin around.

"Garrus! I didn't... I didn't see you. Or feel you. Or whatever. Too busy." She frowned, returning to the monitor.

"Jane, you've been awake for over twenty four hours. A good chunk of which you spent on Tuchanka, fighting a Reaper." He leant against the desk next to where she was working and she shook her head.

"No. Need to finish. Almost cracked it." The terminal beeped again and her implants allowed her to make a very turian growl.

"Cracked what? Jane, what are you doing?" She took her glasses off for a moment and rubbed her eyes before running her hand through the hair that had fallen out of it's bobble, pushing it back away from her face. She sighed before replacing her glasses.

"Mordin refused to tell me about the modifications. Have to hack his files." Garrus frowned.

"Why? Does it bother you that he wouldn't tell you?" She shook her head.

"No. Understand reasoning. Just... have to know." He sighed.

"No, you don't. You're fixating on this instead of dealing with losing him." She frowned at that.

"Am dealing. Dealt with. No, stress is... I'm stressing. Need an outlet. Can't focus on death. Too real now." Now it was Garrus's turn to frown. Something was off. It smelt like blood and...

"Jane, is this cup yours?" She nodded and he smelt the bitterness emanating from the mug. "This is coffee. You don't drink coffee. You drink tea or pop." She nodded.

"Couldn't find tea. Don't like the taste. But caffeine buzz without sugar crash. Acceptable trade off." He sighed, shaking his head.

"So what you're saying is you lost a friend today (yesterday, technically) and, instead of sleeping, you pumped yourself full of caffeine?" She nodded, looking a little sheepish.

"Not my smartest plan, huh?" He shook his head.

"Come on, if Mordin didn't want you to know he probably had a good reason. Let's get some sleep." She sighed.

"I might head down to the gym for a while. I need to work off this buzz. And this stress." He lowered his forehead to hers.

"I can think of another way to work off this stress..." He muttered and she smiled.

"Good. I need to test this new modification anyway." He gave her a questioning look.

"Oh? What is it?"

"Night vision."


	40. Chapter 40

**Cha****pter 40**

"Dammit Shepard, he almost got you." Garrus growled as he took down the last Cerberus operative.

"He didn't." She growled back, glaring at him.

"This wouldn't be a problem if you would just wear more armour." He pointed out, sighing but she kept glaring. Kept growling.

"I'd lose manoeuvrability." She argued angrily. He sighed, knowing she wasn't really angry at him. She was angry at Cerberus. And he was too. But she was also worried. He had felt her freeze momentarily with panic as they approached the Citadel, her mind running to Kara and her gran. They knew that Thane and Kaidan were safe but no one had heard from Elle and Kara and it had Jane all wound up. She was struggling to keep her mind focused on battle which was dangerous. Especially since she insisted on wearing minimal light armour.

"If you two could stop having a lovers spat for two seconds, there's a shot cop over here." James yelled and Shepard was pulled out of her anger.

"Bailey! Shit, are you okay?" Bailey groaned as she approached.

"I'll be fine. But the bastards took C-Sec headquarters in the first push. We gotta kick them outta there. Everyone in C-Sec's flying blind without the network." She frowned, shaking her head. This just got worse and worse.

"How bad's the situation? Do you know if the councillors are still alive?" Garrus asked and Shepard swallowed her own questions. She had to prioritise. The mission came first, then her personal concerns.

"They split up. I'll know more if I can access a terminal inside." Shepard took a breath, steeling herself for the answer to her next question.

"Bailey, I know it's a long shot but have you heard from Kara or my gran?" Shepard asked, biting her lip but otherwise remaining stoic. Bailey nodded.

"I was in the bakery on break when Cerberus hit. They were fine. Elle said she'd head to the lower wards with Kara, nothing for Cerberus there but a lot of sleazy bars and old mercs so they're avoiding that area. Don't worry, Shepard. Elle can handle a gun and Kara managed on the streets for a whole year before you picked her up." Shepard nodded, a little relieved. Enough so that she could focus on shooting every Cerberus bastard she could find.

"Thanks, Bailey. Can you get us in?" She asked, indicating towards the door.

"I'll get the door. If no one interrupts me with a bullet this time." They entered the building cautiously, keeping an eye out for Cerberus troops as Bailey headed towards the nearest terminal.

"Here we go. C-Sec network access, courtesy of Cerberus." He stated as he worked at the terminal and Shepard nodded in response.

"Are you okay to stay here and co-ordinate C-Sec forces?" She asked and Bailey nodded as he worked his way into the computer.

"Hello..." He said as Shepard keyed her glasses into the C-Sec channel Bailey was setting up.

"What have you got?" She asked as the data was sent to the screens in front of her eyes.

"A warning from Councillor Valern. He's supposed to be here, meeting with the executor." Shepard frowned as the warning scrolled across her glasses.

" 'Be on guard - the likelihood of betrayal form within is high.' " She read aloud before cursing, causing Garrus to look at her, a little disbelieving.

"You don't think Udina, do you?" She shrugged.

"That's what the councillor said over the QEC and if he was talking to the executor..." Garrus frowned.

"You think he's working with Cerberus?" Shepard sighed, biting her lip again. She hated making judgement calls on someone else's character. She was really bad at it. Garrus on the other hand...

"I think he fits the profile. But you're the investigator here, I'm just here to look pretty and shoot things. Occasionally I solve complex mathematical problems but that doesn't come up too often in our line of work." She joked as she saw the gears turning in her bondmate's mind.

"I think you're right. He does fit the profile. But I can't say more without more information." She nodded, understanding.

"You know who'd have that information? The councillor." Bailey reasoned and Shepard nodded.

"One councillor's better than zero. Where am I headed?"

* * *

Shepard left Thane's room in the hospital, refusing to cry. She'd been thinking a lot since Mordin's death. Since Garrus had tried to comfort her, all the while thinking about her death and he had lost her. How everyone had coped in their own way. His mind had then drifted to how he had found her days after Virmire and he wondered how she had coped just after. Or, just after Mindoir for that matter. But the truth was she hadn't.

She had stayed strong after Mindoir for her mother, who had been doing the same for her, and carried the anger with her until she killed the batarians in the slave camp. Virmire was different. It had been her fault, her choice. But it was the right one and Ashley had known that. Jane knew that Ashley was prepared to give her life on that mission and it helped to ease the hurt. In the end, she figured, it came down to what you were willing to die for. If she had known that she would die saving Joker on the SR1, she still would have done it. She had made that decision as a fully functioning adult and she hated that it had affected so many others. Left those she cared about in pain. She figured it was the same for Ashley and Mordin and Thane. She would miss them, but letting the pain cripple her devalued their sacrifice. She would destroy every single Reaper and make sure that their sacrifices were not in vain.

Still, when Garrus approached her and wrapped her in his arms, she didn't object.

"Elle and Kara are fine. They've gone to check the state of the bakery." Jane nodded, taking a deep breath before heading to the lift and keying in Zakera Ward.

"Garrus, I..." He nodded, understanding.

"You were right about the Citadel not being safe. You don't want them to stay here, do you?" She shook her head.

"It's dumb, really. There is no where else for them to go. Plus, Gran would never leave the bakery." Garrus shrugged as they left the lift.

"She might for Kara's sake." Shepard sighed as they trekked through the wreckage.

"Still doesn't solve the problem of where they should go. No where is safe right now. Hell, the safest place is probably the Normandy." She sighed again, climbing over a broken advertisement.

"So, let's take them with us. Like you said, it's as safe as anywhere and at least it would give you peace of mind." She bit her lip a little as she thought, pushing her glasses up her nose.

"Yeah, maybe..." She mused before being cut off by a gasp escaping her throat as they approached. The entire bakery had collapsed. Most of the damage she had seen so far had been superficial but it looked as if Cerberus had planted a bomb along the back wall to gain entrance into C-Sec, tearing the entire place apart. As she approached she saw her gran and Kara picking what they could out of the wreckage.

"You guys need a hand?" She asked as she approached, lifting away a larger piece of debris.

"That would be great, petal. Kara and I are just trying to salvage what we can..." Her gran said as she sifted through smaller pieces of debris.

"All of the books are okay!" Kara yelled, holding up an old copy of Eric by Terry Pratchett that Jane recognised as one of her gran's favourites.

"Well, that's something at least. Put everything you can into the bag, petal. Necessities like clothes are a priority." Kara nodded, loading the books into a backpack that looked like it was hers for school.

"Do you guys have anywhere else to stay?" Jane asked and her gran shook her head.

"The Citadel has been over-run with refugees since the war began. Honestly, there are dozens of poor souls without homes right now. Hell, if the flat was any bigger I would have taken some of them in but it's small enough with just Kara and I. Don't worry, though, petal. We'll be fine." Jane shook her head at that.

"I've not been a fan of the Citadel since I found that it was built by the Reapers. This attack just confirms what I already suspected, it's not safe for you guys here." Her gran laughed a little at that.

"That's sweet petal but no where is safe right now. Even the most innocuous colonies are being hit, as are the places that were once considered the most secure like Earth and Palaven." Jane nodded in agreement.

"I know, that's why I was thinking the Normandy. Honestly, it's probably the safest place in the galaxy right now." Her gran nodded a little.

"I'm sure it is Jane but I doubt there would be enough room for two non-combatants on such a small ship." Shepard shrugged at that, smiling a little.

"We left in kind of a hurry so we're not fully staffed. There's plenty of room and I think that the boost to morale of having someone on board who can cook something that isn't rations will be invaluable." Her gran laughed a little at that as Jane and Garrus helped her to move a large piece of debris.

"As long as you don't think we'd be imposing..." Jane shook her head.

"Not at all. Although you might want to pick up some vegetarian supplies before boarding, there aren't many veggie soldiers, I'm afraid." Her gran nodded.

"Not a problem, petal." She said as Kara came up to them, her bag filled mostly with books but also with a few pieces of clothing and underwear.

"Does this mean that we get to fly around in your spaceship?!" Kara exclaimed and Jane grinned from ear to ear.

"Yep." She replied happily as Kara bounced a little, excitedly.

"So, I don't have to go to school any more?" Jane laughed at that.

"I'm sure someone can tutor you so you don't fall behind." Elle said and Kara's face fell a little, but she still seemed excited. Jane kept grinning as Garrus snuck up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, his sub-harmonics reflecting the contented sound that hers were making.

"I missed this." She admitted as Garrus held her close. "Say what you will about a Cerberus ship, so few of that crew were military and it felt more like a family. The ship is run too tight right now. It lacks the messy element. The domestic element. It feels less like home than it once did." Garrus shook his head a little at that, smiling.

"Yes, having an excited eleven year-old on board does seem like the best way to remedy that, doesn't it?" She grinned back at him.

"Exactly..."

* * *

"How can you not eat meat at all? Doesn't that make you sick?" Garrus asked as they all headed back tot he Normandy.

"No, it's fine as long as you make sure to eat enough protein. Although, children need meat to grow so Kara isn't allowed to go full veggie yet. Although she keeps on insisting." Kara nodded enthusiastically.

"I only eat fish now and I'm going to stop once I stop growing, just like Aunt Jane did." Garrus turned to his bondmate, giving her a confused look and she shrugged.

"I never ate much anyway so it wasn't hard to not eat meat on the ships I lived on. I was a full blown vegetarian for a couple of years until my biotics kicked in. At that point I had to start eating meat again to cope with the demand of my biotics." She explained and Garrus shook his head.

"See, turians would just get sick. You can get synthetic replacements but they're expensive and not recommended for long term use. We don't even have a word for 'vegetarian'. The first time I heard it I thought it was a translator glitch." Jane grinned at that.

"To be fair, most Earth languages don't have a word for it. Most just use the English word." She explained as they approached the airlock where they were greeted by Kaidan.

"Hey, Shepard. Can we talk?" Jane nodded.

"Garrus, can you sort these guys out? EDI should have set up some room for them by now." Garrus nodded at that and escorted them into the ship, leaving Jane alone with Kaidan.

"What's up?" She asked as he leant against the railing.

"I'm trying to wrap my head around what just happened." He said and she bit her lip, uncertain of how to respond. Kaidan had never been an easy guy to read but lately she'd been finding it frustrating as hell to figure out exactly what her responses should be.

"You sound angry." She settled for, trying to determine where the edge in his voice was coming from.

"No. Just not used to staring down the gun of someone I've worked with so closely. How it all went down, it's got me... I don't know." Shepard took a deep breath and decided to approach this logically, as she would approach anything else.

"Okay, so tell me exactly what's bothering you." He sighed, unfolding his arms.

"If I hadn't backed down first, I feel like you would have taken me out." She rolled her eyes at that. He really was clueless sometimes.

"Kaidan, there are various degrees between doing nothing and killing you. Honestly, I had several scenarios running through my head at the time and only one of them ended up with you dead." He frowned, eyeing her suspiciously.

"I don't know if that makes me feel any better..." She sighed again, smiling a little.

"That was the scenario where instead of backing down you shot me." Kaidan looked at her, incredulously.

"Shepard, I would never have shot you." She sighed at that, shaking her head.

"Maybe, maybe not. Kaidan, you haven't exactly been the most consistent guy when it comes down to how you act towards me. As much as I wanted to believe that you would trust me, the evidence didn't back it up." He sighed, nodding his head.

"Yeah, I guess I have to agree with that. So, you think you could still take me down if I shot you first?" He joked, trying to lighten the mood and she raised an eyebrow.

"No, in the scenario Garrus tore you limb from limb." Kaidan looked a little uncomfortable at that but nodded his head, smiling anyway.

"Ah." He said, a little jokingly and she smiled back but there was something still bothering him.

"Kaidan, was there something else?" He sighed.

"It's just... how can you talk about your decision and remain so calm. How can you not be bothered by..." She sighed, finally twigging what he meant.

"This is about Udina?" He nodded and she sighed. "Kaidan, he gave you no choice. If you hadn't shot him, I would have." He kept looking uncomfortable.

"But, like you said, there are degrees. Would you have killed him?" Jane bit her lip before giving him a straight answer.

"A kill shot had the best odds for preventing any harm to the other councillors. I don't kill when I don't have to Kaidan, I learnt that lesson the hard way, but Udina made his choice. We gave him plenty of opportunity to back down and be taken into custody. You can't blame yourself for how others behave, only how you react." She folded her arms, remembering the similar conversation she'd had with Garrus on the SR1. Only that time, the situation had been reversed. Garrus understood her need to protect others but he hadn't learnt the hard lesson like she had, not until Sidonis. Kaidan, on the other hand, was too hesitant to act. She figured that she didn't want to be around the day it cost him.

"Okay." He sighed, nodding a little. "Look, Shepard. There's another reason I'm here. Hackett offered me a position but I'd turn it down in a second to get a chance to join you on the Normandy again." She took a deep breath, biting her lip. He had made it clear in the past that he didn't trust her but by siding with her about Udina he had shown that that had changed.

"Alright Kaidan but I need you to understand. You're career military and very by the book. I'm not. You saw how unorthodox my methods were on the SR1 and after working for a while without the Alliance watching my every move, things have only gotten more so. What I'm trying to say is, we've got an information broker in the XO's office, a Prothean and a reporter in each cargo hold, there's an AI walking around with a new sexy body and she and the pilot have been getting particularly close, we currently have two civilians living on board, one of whom is eleven, and if you can't reach me to talk to me then Garrus is the guy you need, regardless of protocol. I need to know that you can work with the crazy and that no matter how weird or out of the blue my orders seem, you can and will follow them. If you can do that, then welcome aboard. If not, you're just a liability." Kaidan took a deep breath, nodding.

"I'm not going to pretend that I understood all of your decisions on the SR1, or that I agreed with them, but they got the job done better than anything more conventional would have. So, I can work with the crazy." She nodded.

"Then welcome aboard, Major."


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter 41**

Kaidan entered the CIC to find Specialist Traynor and Kara chatting by the galaxy map.

"So, there's Earth?" Kara asked, pointing to the Sol system.

"Right." Traynor replied and Kara frowned a little before pointing to the Serpent Nebula.

"And there's the Citadel?" Traynor nodded again.

"Right. All that's left is Palaven." Kara tilted her head to the side a little before pointing to the correct system. Traynor nodded again. "Seems to me like you know your stuff. Quick quiz: Explain the molecular differences between a liquid, a gas and a solid." Kara nodded, perching herself on the railing of the galaxy map.

"All of the molecules in a solid are tightly packed together and don't move around much, in a liquid they're less tightly packed, but still close together, and move over and around each other, and in a gas they have a lot of energy and move around much more, not staying close together at all." Traynor nodded again, frowning a little.

"Well, I'd say you're ready to take your end of year exam now. I don't understand these mock test results at all..." Kara shifted a little, looking uncomfortable.

"I can answer when you ask me like this but I've never been any good with words. The letters never make any sense to me." Traynor frowned at that as Kaidan approached.

"So, you're dyslexic?" She asked and Kara shrugged.

"That's what Gran said but my teachers think it's just because I've never really been in school before." Kaidan frowned, joining in the conversation.

"You've never been in school before?" She shook her head.

"I guess I went when I was little but I've been in the System for almost as long as I can remember. They never managed to find me a permanent home until Gran so I spent a lot of time with the Rats until I became too old for the System. I was still small enough to be a Rat so that's what I did." Kaidan frowned at that.

"A Rat?" He asked and she shrugged a little, swinging her legs.

"A Duct Rat. There were a bunch of us on the Citadel. The older ones like me would run errands for people and look after the smaller ones. I overheard something I shouldn't have while running an errand and I went to C-Sec. They found out and tried to get me. That's when Aunt Jane found me and took me to Gran." Kara smiled as she recounted the last part of her story. Kaidan was at a bit of a loss. He'd never seen that side of the Citadel before. Traynor just took it all in stride.

"Do you ever see the other Rats?" Traynor asked and Kara nodded.

"There's an asari that visits the bakery, Elona, who agreed to help when I told her about the other Rats. She's been looking out for them and making sure they have a safe place to stay. We all used to camp out in an abandoned storage building and she bought the building and agreed to let them stay there. She makes sure they have food and clothes and things but they still look after themselves. I know there are more Duct Rats that aren't part of that little gang but there's not much we can do for them." Kara shrugged, looking happy as Traynor looked at her screen and sighed before hitting a button.

"That's it. All of your past results have been deleted. We can teach you like this and you can take your end of year exams orally, okay?" Kara grinned, nodding.

"Great." She said and Kaidan frowned.

"Who's 'we'?" He asked Traynor and she shrugged.

"Different people are pitching in with different subjects to tutor Kara. Or, at least, keep her occupied." She teased and Kara pulled a face.

"It's not my fault! It's just so exciting to be on a ship!" She grinned, still in awe of the Normandy and the crew. Traynor figured that it didn't hurt that Shepard spent every spare moment with the young girl who had a serious case of hero-worship.

"Shuttle is docking." EDI's voice came over the speakers and Traynor turned to Kara once more.

"What do you think?" Kara considered for a moment before answering.

"Angry." Traynor frowned at that.

"Are you sure? She seemed fine when she left the ship." Kara shook her head.

"Just wait for it." She replied and Kaidan frowned.

"Wait, I'm missing something here." He said but Kara shook her head again.

"Wait for it." She repeated as the elevator door opened to reveal Shepard and Garrus, both growling at each other.

"What part of 'no dresses' do you not understand?" Shepard asked, her biotics flaring a little.

"Hey, Jacob was the one that brought it up, not me!" Garrus defended but she waved her arms in response as they left the lift, ignoring everyone as they headed towards the War Room.

"Yeah, but now you're thinking that there's no point if we don't do this properly!" Garrus sighed with frustartion at that.

"But I didn't _say_ that!" He yelled as the door shut behind them. Kara turned to Traynor, looking smug.

"Told ya." She sang and Traynor shook her head as she brought up her omni-tool.

"Okay, okay. You were right. Here are your ten credits. Don't spend it all on sweets or Elle will kill me." Kara shook her head at that.

"No, I'm getting a VirtuaPet for my omni-tool." Kaidan just frowned at both of them.

"Erm... what the hell was that?" He asked and the two girls smiled at him.

"Aunt Jane doesn't do parties. And she _really_ doesn't do weddings. Especially not her own." Kaidan kept frowning.

"I thought they were already married..." Traynor shook her head at that.

"By turian tradition, yeah. She has the bondmarks on her neck and that's pretty much it. But they have agreed to have a proper human wedding after the war and it's... interesting to watch the plans develop." Kara smiled at that.

"You'd think that the crazy psychic bond they have would stop the arguments." Kara said but Traynor just shrugged.

"I think she just needs to vent the stress." She reasoned and Kara nodded.

"So, why are they even bothering with it?" Kaidan asked and Kara answered him.

"Aunt Jane said that she's been getting really annoyed by people thinking that their relationship is weird. She decided to have a proper wedding because she feels she owes it to all of the other potential human-turian couples. Of course, despite all that she hates the attention. So, she's stressed out about it. Although she has decided that once the wedding's over, she's going to disappear with Uncle Garrus and the Normandy." Kaidan frowned at that.

"The Normandy is an Alliance ship, she can't just-" This time EDI cut him off.

"The Normandy does not belong to the Alliance. One of the conditions of turning herself over to them was that she retained ownership of the ship." Kaidan frowned more deeply at that.

"But that's irresponsible, the Alliance needs every ship it can get-" EDI cut him off again.

"Major, I am a part of this ship. If handed to the Alliance there is no guarantee that I would be left alone. Shepard's decision has guaranteed my continued existence and safety. I suggest you think carefully before questioning it." It was difficult to miss the threat in the AI's voice and he was simply getting glares from Traynor and Kara. He sighed a little at that. As much as he had told Shepard that he could deal with the crazy, it hadn't been easy. He hadn't really left the observation deck since he had arrived, just to avoid it all and stop it from getting overwhelming. He wondered if this was how Shepard had felt on the SR1...

"I'm sorry, EDI. I guess I'm still not used to how Shepard does things..."

* * *

The conference room was empty except for Jane and Garrus. Jane had finally vented all of her anger and was at a loss for what to say after spending the last hour using her love as a verbal punching bag.

"I'm sorry, Garrus. You didn't deserve any of that..." She finally managed, leaning against the wall as one hand pushed her glasses back up her nose and the other ran through her hair.

"I know, ani. Now, are you going to tell me what's really bothering you? I know you're not this worked up over the wedding." She sighed at that, nodding a little.

"I'm just _tired_, Garrus. I'm tired of this war, of losing people, those I know and those I don't, and of knowing that no matter how hard I try this is going to get worse before it gets better... I'm trying to keep it together, I have to. I'm coping by focusing on the endgame. I'm focusing on getting rid of the Reapers and it's helping to keep away the thoughts of those we've lost but... It all just builds up and then the nightmares started again..."

That was the point at which she broke.

"God, Garrus, every night... Thane and Mordin and Ashley... even that little boy from Earth... that poor kid... All of them running around in my head, reminding me again and again of what I've lost... showing me what I _could_ lose..." He pulled her into his arms as she started to sob silently, her tears building up in her glasses so that she had to take them off. She tried to regain control of her breathing and eventually fell to her old trick of singing to focus on each breath until she stopped crying.

"_The storm is coming but I don't mind. _  
_People are dying, I close my blinds. _

_All that I know is I'm breathing now. _

_I want to change the world...instead I sleep. _  
_I want to believe in more than you and me. _

_But all that I know is I'm breathing. _  
_All I can do is keep breathing. _  
_All we can do is keep breathing now. _

_All that I know is i'm breathing. _  
_All I can do is keep breathing. _  
_All we can do is keep breathing now._" The tears eventually stopped and she wiped her eyes as he held her close.

"I'm sorry, Garrus. This is so stupid, I shouldn't-" He cut her off at that.

"Jane, I've never seen you cry properly and every time you come close you apologise. Why? Isn't it normal for humans to cry?" She nodded at that.

"I guess. I suppose it's just habit. My mom always hated it when I cried. It made her so angry. I think I had stopped crying at all by the time I was Kara's age. I think... I think I cried after Mindoir but I was careful to be silent so that my mom wouldn't hear. She was already so upset and I didn't want to make it worse. She needed me to be strong. After that I didn't cry again until after Virmire, when I locked myself in my quarters. I just... Garrus everyone needs me right now. It's so _selfish_ of me to break down like this." He sighed at that, shaking his head a little. Only she would blame herself for crying over lost friends. He felt her thoughts drift to him and how he needed her to stay strong for him when he was having just as hard a time as her.

"I don't need Commander Shepard. I need Jane, ani. I need _you._ And right now you need me too. And that's okay. You don't need to bottle all this up and hide it from me so that it haunts you at night." She bit her lip, nodding a little.

"I just... I hate this. Feeling like I'm not strong enough to protect those I love..." He understood, feeling exactly the same way.

"Commander, we're picking up a distress signal that Garrus is going to want to hear." Joker's voice came over the comm system and Garrus keyed his omni-tool into the signal.

"Garrus?" The voice in the message asked and Jane watched as her bondmate took a sharp intake of breath, not really trusting what he though he had heard.

"Dad?" He asked hesitantly.

"We made it off Palaven... Ship crashed... Both alive but... Broken leg... Reapers advancing..." The message dissolved into static and Garrus frowned.

"Dad? Dad?!" He growled a little in frustration.

"The signal has been lost." EDI's voice came over the comm and Garrus shook his head in frustration.

"Dammit!" He muttered as Jane held him close to her.

"Did we get coordinates, EDI?" She asked as Garrus struggled to sift through his emotions.

"Yes, Commander. Do you want me to set a course?" She nodded.

"Do it." She told the AI before turning back to Garrus. "We'll get them, okay? They'll be fine." She didn't promise. She wouldn't make promises she couldn't keep...

* * *

They dropped down to the moon where Garrus's family had crashed. The ship seemed small, as if for just a handful of people and she wondered how many others had been with them as they fought their way through the Reaper ground troops. She quickly glanced over to Garrus as she felt how close he was to foregoing his sniper and simply ripping apart the beasts with his bare hands. This wasn't Garrus, this was Archangel. And he was pissed.

Shepard quickly made it to the top of a steep hill and saw two turians fighting on the other side, recognising Solana and figuring that the older male was Garrus's father. She slid down the side of the hill, her biotics flaring as she decapitated a husk that was advancing on Garrus's father before shooting a second in the head with her shotgun, leaving the area clear as Garrus approached.

"I'm Commander Shepard. I'm here to get you out of here." She said to the elder Vakarian as Garrus walked up next to her and she felt his relief wash over her.

"Yes, I know who you are, Commander. I'm Aiterus Vakarian." She simply nodded, noting the animosity in his voice before moving to help Sol who was working on a broken leg.

"Spirits Dad, when Palaven was hit I feared the worst..." His father nodded at that as they headed back toward the shuttle.

"We're fine now, Garrus. When we heard that the Normandy had picked up the Primarch I figured that you had gone back to the Commander." Shepard noted how he didn't say her name and the hatred in the word 'Commander'. She gave Sol a questioning look who replied with a sympathetic one. _Just great_... she though to herself as they boarded the shuttle.

"Well, you're both welcome to stay with us on the Normandy. There's not really anywhere else left to go..." Shepard offered. She had made the decision as they had approached the moon, knowing that Garrus was faced with the same dilemma that she had been with her gran and Kara. Aiterus just nodded his head, refusing to really look at the commander and Solana sighed a little before turning to her friend.

"Thank you, Jane. That's very kind of you." She nodded at that as Garrus stood next to her protectively, very aware that Jane had picked up on his father's attitude.

"It's no problem. When we get back you should have Chakwas look at that leg. Lord knows she's patched your brother up enough times to know what she's doing." She joked and Garrus shook his head.

"I've never had more than grazes." He said and she snorted.

"Yeah, if you exclude the rocket." She said as he shook his head.

"Hey, you died. You have no room to talk." She laughed at his bad joke as it brought up no unpleasant memories. Their shared burden had been eased a little and they were going to enjoy the small relief, knowing it wouldn't last long. Although something was tugging on the edges of her mind so she focused on communicating with Garrus silently.

_So, did I do something specific to piss off your dad or is it just all of the little things like stealing you away from C-Sec and worming my way into your heart?_

_The little things. He thinks you're a bad influence._

_I am. But so are you._

_I know. Don't worry, ani. There's only so long someone can be near you without starting to like you. I mean, Sol didn't like you when she first met you and now you're the sister she never had._

_You always know exactly what to say. Or think. Or whatever._

_I try..._


	42. Chapter 42

**Chapter 42**

"Okay, you have to tell me if it's bad. I think I messed up the measurements for the frosting." Kara said to Solana as the turian woman sat in the mess with her leg in a cast. She looked at the dark blue piece of cake in front of her and took a bite, not expecting much from a young girl who couldn't even eat the cake she had made. So, she was surprised when it was one of the best versions of the cake she had ever eaten.

"This is great, Kara. It's hard to believe that you've never tasted this kind of cake before." The young girl just shrugged.

"I tried to eat dextro once and it made me sick so Gran says I'm not allowed any more until she can get me some allergy meds. She's so lucky that she's not allergic and Aunt Jane could even eat dextro instead of levo if she wanted! I'm jealous..." Sol smiled at the young girl as she removed her apron. At that point James and Javik entered the mess. Solana found the human man annoying but friendly so she let his bad jokes slide. The Prothean on the other hand, gave her the creeps. Kara, on the other hand, seemed completely at ease with both of them.

"I still do not understand why you do not simply use my name." Javik told James as they approached and the human rolled his eyes.

"I already told you, I'm not good with names. Everyone has a nickname. Kara here is Chica and Sol over here is Hot Stuff." Sol fixed him with a glare and he held his hands up in defence. "Okay, okay, her nickname is Sunshine." Javik didn't respond for a moment so Kara decided to speak up.

"You know, my nickname isn't the most imaginative. You've only called me that because I'm a kid." James shrugged at that.

"Hey, they can't all be winners Chica." She shook her head and Javik nodded.

"The child has a point. I would rather you use my name than a mediocre nickname." Kara laughed a little at that and James pulled a face as Shepard entered the room. Solana gasped mockingly.

"I don't think I've ever seen you without my brother at your side since I came on board." She joked and Shepard rolled her eyes as she sat next to her.

"Hey, it's been known to happen." She joked back.

"So, where is Uncle Garrus? I made dextro cake and Sol said it's nice but I think she might be lying so I want a second opinion." Sol pulled a mockingly outraged face.

"Don't you trust me?" She asked jokingly and Kara grinned back.

"Nope." She joked back and Sol made a face at her as Shepard spoke up.

"He's fixing up his rifle so you probably want to leave him be until he's done. I'll have some, though." Kara passed her a slice as James looked at her questioningly.

"So, Lola. How come you can't cook if you come from a family a bakers?" She narrowed her eyes at him.

"I can _bake_, I just can't _cook_. The two skill sets are completely different." James raised an eyebrow at that.

"Uh-huh. So, how come I've never seen you _bake_ anything?" He asked and she just smirked.

"I've been too busy defeating Reapers, thank you very much. Anyway, between Kara and Gran I think we have enough baked goods to hand to see us through this war." She joked and James shrugged in response. Javik did not seem impressed.

"I do not understand your insistence on teaching meaningless skills to your young. Field rations are sufficient to sustain you." Shepard sighed, about to tell Javik that someone had to make those rations, when Kara spoke up.

"Well you said you'd teach me to fight but you haven't yet." She told him and Shepard raised an eyebrow.

"I have time now if you still wish to learn." The prothean replied and Kara nodded enthusiastically.

"Kara, you have cleared this with Gran, haven't you?" The young girl nodded.

"Yeah, yeah. It's fine." She said, following the prothean out of the room causing Shepard to sigh and turn to James.

"Would you mind just checking that for me? Last thing I need is Kara thinking she can get away with lying..." James smiled at that.

"Sure thing, Lola." He said, heading out of the room as Shepard shook her head, smiling a little.

"That kid sure has a knack for making friends." Solana observed and Shepard nodded.

"Well, if she can win over _Javik_ then I imagine she'd be able to make friends with anyone." She said smiling and Sol carefully regarded the human commander.

"You're good with her. I wouldn't imagine the military gives you a lot of experience around kids." Shepard frowned a little at that. She thought that curing the genophage would finally put the subject to rest. Evidently not...

"No. I had younger cousins growing up and I used to look after them. Back before... before I wanted to join the military." Sol nodded, understanding.

"When Garrus was at C-Sec he became known as the go-to guy if they had to deal with kids. He always joked that it was because he grew up looking after me." Shepard sighed, raising an eyebrow at Sol.

"Being a cop just runs in the family, huh?" Sol looked a little disquieted by that and Shepard sighed again. "Sol, I've known your brother for years. I've become immune to all of his classic cop questioning tactics. I have to hand it to you, I almost didn't see what you were trying to do." Sol shrugged at that.

"I figured if I asked you about it straight you would lie or avoid the subject." Shepard shrugged at that.

"Sol, I can't think past this war. Hell, it's reason number one that I'm still doing this whole wedding debacle. I need something to come home to once this is all over, a reason to keep fighting. Focusing on what my future can't contain isn't the way to do that." Sol nodded at that.

"Fair enough." She said as Shepard moved to make herself a cup of tea.

"So, what about you? Anyone special out there?" Sol shook her head.

"Nothing like what you and Garrus have at least. Which is fine, bondmates aren't that common. There is one guy, a childhood friend. He and I always said that if we grew up and didn't find our bondmates we'd get married... Although, with this war it's not as if I can really plan any kind of future beyond the next few days. I don't even know where he is right now." She sighed, pulling herself out of her sad musings and smiling weakly. She was with her family, she had more than most right now. Shepard noticed and decided to change the subject.

"So, if you're such a cop, why didn't you go into C-Sec?" Sol shrugged at that.

"Because Garrus beat me to it, I guess. It's difficult, being the younger sibling. Everyone compares my achievements to the ones he already has. I decided that I would rather stay in the military so that it wasn't so easy to compare us. I left to look after Mom when she got sick, though." Shepard frowned a little at that.

"So, what about now? I mean, clearly for now you're welcome on my team. You know, once your leg has healed. But once we defeat the Reapers and this is all over, what do you think you'll do? Think you'll go back to the turian military?" Sol shook her head at that.

"No, I don't think I'll go back. I was toying with the idea after Mom died but then Garrus goes and sets up a task force and ends up further up the ranks than I could ever reach." Shepard smiled a little.

"You know, he never did _that_ well at C-Sec. You know, before I came along and stole him away on my ridiculous quest. So you should try there. I know he's sure as hell not going to go back. Too busy following me on irresponsible missions where I behave recklessly." Sol snorted a little at that as Jane waved her arms around in a dramatic fashion.

"Garrus isn't cleaning his rifle, is he?" Shepard sighed at that and slumped her shoulders.

"No, he's having a 'chat' with your dad. I told him that it was alright, I don't want to cause any problems between the two of them, but the snide comments have really been getting to Garrus." Sol nodded at that.

"Honestly, I was worried that he wouldn't be as patient with Dad. I know he's being an ass but... it could be worse. I had hoped that after meeting you he would come around but, well I guess it's obvious where Garrus gets his stubbornness from." She said, shrugging apologetically while Shepard sighed.

"I hate this. I hate causing problems between the two of them." Sol sighed at that, shaking her head.

"Jane, you're not causing any new problems. This is the same personality clash that has always been there. It's just that this time Dad can't convince himself that Garrus is going to grow out of it or change his mind. Don't take it to heart, it's their problem and actually has very little to do with you."

"Right, your father just doesn't like me." She said sarcastically and Sol smiled.

"He doesn't like anyone." She told her friend as the human woman groaned, dropping her head into her arms.

"Can I go back to the Ardat-Yakshi monastery and kill some more Reapers instead of dealing with this?" She mumbled and Sol laughed a little.

"Well, think of it this way: the faster you defeat the Reapers, the faster he'll be out of your hair. That is the right expression, isn't it?" Shepard nodded.

"Yeah, it is. And you're right. I've got to think of it as an incentive..."


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter 43**

"How do you not suffocate inside that suit? I don't see any air tanks..." Shepard sighed, shaking her head as Kara seemed to be jumping around Tali.

"_Kara_." Her gran warned but Tali's eyes lit up in a way that Shepard knew meant that she was smiling.

"It's no problem. I have air filters, they keep out any germs and let me breath the same air as you." Tali answered as Shepard finished putting on her armour.

"Are you having a flashback to the first time you met a quarian, too?" Her gran asked her, smiling. Shepard smiled back.

"Yep." Shepard replied, grinning as she, Garrus and Tali headed towards the airlock. "Come on guys, we've got a dreadnought to disable." She said to her squad as they entered the airlock and she put on her helmet.

"Good to have you back, Tali. Maybe with another dextro aboard they'll get better food." Garrus said and Shepard pulled a face, although it couldn't be seen through her helmet.

"You're exaggerating. Kara and Gran make dextro all the time..." She pointed out, the humour evident in the edges of her voice making Garrus chuckle a little.

"As long as it's sterilized." Tali said and Shepard nodded.

"Elle specialises in food for people with allergies and the like so her dextro is brilliant and she also knows how to sterilize it. The main problem is that she also specialises in cakes so don't expect anything savoury while you're aboard. Dr Michel sent me some dextro chocolates a while ago and I haven't even gotten around to opening them. In fact, you're welcome to them if you want." He said and Shepard was glad that he couldn't see the face she was pulling, although she suspected he felt her frustration at his cluelessness.

"She got you turian chocolates?" Tali asked, a little surprised and also clearly finding it a little funny.

"Yeah. Why?" He caught onto the annoyance Shepard was feeling but couldn't find the source.

"No reason. Watch yourself, Shepard." Tali joked and Shepard shook her head, laughing a little as she felt Garrus's surprise through their bond.

"You are so _clueless_ sometimes, Garrus." She said as he shook his head at her.

"Well, come on Shepard. How long did it take him to realise you liked him?" Tali asked and shook her head in response.

"Yeah but that doesn't count because I didn't realise that he liked me, either. Regardless, I think I should send a wedding invite to the good doctor when this is all over..." Shepard mused and Tali and Garrus both shook their heads in amusement.

"Shepard, you will have to access the dreadnought via the docking tube." EDI's voice sounded throughout the airlock and Shepard sighed, trying to expel the fear from her chest.

"So, I'll have to go through it..."_  
_

_Darkness as I fall through space..._

_It's cold out here..._

_Colder in my heart..._

_Missed chances and broken promises and the never-ending dark..._

She was pulled out of the memories as Garrus touched her shoulder. She barely felt it through their respective armours but she felt him through their bond, bringing her back to him.

"You don't have to go. I can. Or, I'll at least go with you." He said but she shook her head.

"Garrus, I'm fine. Really." She let her voice show a little irritation. She didn't mind so much anymore when he saw her weak moments, but no one else. Not even Tali. He nodded acceptingly as he felt her use her anger and annoyance to steel herself against the fear.

"Now, let's go get these Geth..."

* * *

"Kara?" Elle asked as she approached the desk under which the young girl was hiding. She had waited in the CIC until Jane, Garrus and Tali had returned but Traynor said that she had fled under the desk as soon as Legion had appeared. "Are you okay?" She asked as she knelt down by the young girl who was still hiding.

"I... Wa- Was that a Geth?" She asked quietly and Elle nodded.

"Yes, that was Legion. Remember? Aunt Jane told you about him." Kara nodded, frowning a little.

"He's... the good geth?" Elle nodded at that and Kara's frown lessened a little.

"You don't have to be frightened of him. He won't hurt you." Kara looked a little disbelieving at that.

"But he's a _geth_." She whispered, her eyes wide. Elle smiled reassuringly.

"Why does that mean that he's bad?" Kara frowned at that.

"Well, the geth attack people." She said and Elle shook her head.

"Only the bad ones. Bad people attack people too." Kara shook her head at that.

"But, it's different. They're machines. AI." Elle raised an eyebrow.

"So? Isn't EDI a machine?" Kara looked a little shocked at the reminder that one of her new friends was an AI.

"Ye- yeah..." She stammered a little.

"Is EDI bad?" The girl shook her head.

"No. She's my friend." Kara said, definitely.

"Then why can't Legion be your friend? He's Aunt Jane's friend. I'm sure if you asked her, she'd introduce you." Kara nodded, taking a deep breath.

"Yeah... Okay..." She said, climbing out from under the desk to face Elle properly. "Thanks, Gran. I'll go find Aunt Jane now, as long as she's not busy." Elle nodded as Kara moved to the elevator and saw the elder Vakarian watching her from across the room.

"Have something to say?" She asked him. She wasn't fond of the way he treated Jane. As far as she was concerned, if he didn't like the way Jane did things then he shouldn't be on her ship. But it wasn't her place to tell him that and Jane had made it clear that she wanted to let Garrus work things out with his father without any interference.

"I do not understand why you encourage her to put herself in danger like that." He said angrily and Elle just shrugged.

"She's not in any danger. If Legion was a threat then Jane wouldn't let him on her ship, plain and simple." She said calmly but his frown didn't lift.

"I don't understand how you can believe that. That woman is as reckless as they come. She has no regard for rules, whatsoever! I don't understand what my son sees in her..." He growled and Elle raised her eyebrow, realising exactly what was bothering the turian.

"It's not as if Garrus is a stickler for the rules, either." She pointed out and Aiterus growled again, pacing a little.

"But he understood that breaking the rules had consequences! He was reprimanded when he acted out of order. Shepard doesn't have a single reprimand in her file and yet instances when she disobeyed the rules or direct orders are common knowledge!" Elle couldn't help but smile at that.

"Just face it. They're as bad as each other. She's just smarter about it than he is. Although, from what she says he's learning from her quickly." The turian raged further at that and Elle continued to smile. She had to admit that it was fun to watch him lose control.

"Exactly! Your granddaughter is a bad influence!" Elle shrugged at that.

"You and Garrus had problems before Jane came along. She's just a problem that even you can't see being fixed. And that's just it. You're seeing her as a problem to be gotten rid of, instead of a person. If you actually knew her, you would understand that she has respect for rules and understands why they're needed."

"They just don't apply to her." He cut her off and she shook her head.

"What does a turian do when he hears a bad order?" She asked and he answered instantly.

"He follows it! Regardless!" Elle just shook her head.

"Jane wouldn't and neither would Garrus. They think for themselves and for that I'm glad. There's nothing worse than someone who can't think past what others tell them too." Aiterus just growled at that. Unable to think of a response. Elle just started to walk towards the elevator but she stopped beside him as she walked past. "Try _talking_ to her. And then judge her. I think you owe her that much. For saving your life, if nothing else..." She said to him before leaving him fuming, still angry at a situation he _knew_ he could do nothing about.


	44. Chapter 44

**Chapter 44**

"Are you _sure_ you're okay?" Garrus asked for what Shepard figured was maybe the tenth time as entered the mess hall.

"_Yes_. For the last time Garrus, I. Am. Fine." She emphasised each word, smiling and shaking her head, trying to convince him that hooking herself into the geth network had had no negative side effects.

"_Jane_..." He said, not buying it. She sighed a little. His concern was touching but she really was fine.

"I have a little, tiny headache." He frowned and she sighed as she felt him sensing her pain through their bond before pulling away as fast as he could.

"Spirits, Jane, that is not a _tiny_ anything." She shook her head at that as she sat next to Sol.

"_Men_. They have _no_ pain tolerance." Sol said and Jane laughed a little.

"Hey, I took a rocket to the face and I was fine the next day. My pain tolerance is just fine." The two women just smirked at that as he sat down next to his bondmate, his arm snaking around her waist, causing Sol to shake her head a little.

"I am still not used to the fact that that's okay with humans..." Shepard just shrugged.

"Well, the turian equivalent is around the upper chest and, trust me, Garrus feeling up my boobs is _way_ less appropriate on a human ship. We're compromising." Sol just shook her head, narrowing her eyes at her brother.

"This is just wish fulfilment for teenage you, isn't it?" She asked and he shrugged.

"I can neither confirm nor deny that." Sol shook her head, turning to Shepard.

"He was terrible as a teenager. The amount of times I had to cover for him with Mom and Dad while he was sneaking a girl out of the window..." Jane laughed a little at that as Garrus shook his head.

"I never figured Garrus for a player..." She said, grinning a little at her bondmate as he conveyed to her the memories of his teenage years to show that Sol was exaggerating. "Although, I know all about covering for siblings, kind of. Sarah was the _worst_. It didn't help that she looked old enough to get her own booze. You don't want to be trying to come up with an excuse for why your fifteen year old cousin is holding a wine glass filled with vodka while she has her tongue down the throat of an asari stripper." Sol gave her the turian equivalent of raised eyebrows at that.

"So, what lie did you settle for?" She asked and Jane shrugged.

"I managed to push most of her mother's anger towards her friends and not her. She still got grounded but it wasn't as miserable for her as it could have been." She reasoned and Sol just shook her head, laughing a little.

"That's what we get for being the responsible ones, huh?" She joked and Shepard laughed a little. Sol finished her food and got up, Jane and Garrus following her.

"Yeah, how did _we_ get that gig?" She joked and Sol just shrugged as Garrus pulled her closer to him and she sighed a little.

"You're cute when you're worried about me, you know?" She told him as he lowered his forehead to hers.

"I am not cute. I am the deadliest sniper..." He argued, his voice low, and she smiled cheekily.

"You're cute when you're irritated." She countered as she moved to kiss him, but was interrupted by Sol.

"Dad!" Sol cried out as she saw him approach, causing Garrus and Jane to instantly let go of each other. Aiterus gave them both a disapproving glare and Jane fought hard against a blush. They'd gotten complacent about PDA since the crew had all found out about their relationship. His father had barely left the quarters that had been set up for them and when he had, he had either avoided Shepard or been cold towards her. It was beginning to _really_ bug her. She got it, he didn't like her. She figured that he would have calmed over time but Garrus warned her that he was still in pain over their mother's death and the anger was easier for him to deal with. His father had no mercs to chase down on Omega so Shepard had become the next best target.

"Sol. Garrus. _Shepard_." He greeted them each in turn and Shepard momentarily panicked a little as she realised that she had no idea how to address him. Garrus tried to tell her through their bond but since she didn't already know the term, she could pick up the meaning but not the exact work. So, she settled.

"Sir." She replied, shifting her stance. It wasn't one Garrus recognised but he could see it through their bond as the stance she had often taken with her instructors in the early days of biotic training. When she didn't have the confidence in her own abilities and was constantly frustrated by failure.

"So, is this what you call appropriate behaviour for a commanding officer?" He asked, indicating how close she'd been with Garrus in public.

"I suppose not." She said evenly, putting all of her effort into looking him in the eye. Garrus frowned as he felt Jane retreat inside herself, as if she was a teenager all over again. But, to her credit, she remained stoic and kept eye contact.

"Dad, this isn't just a ship. This is our _home_." Garrus spoke up but his father kept his attention on Shepard.

"So, that's your excuse for the lax attitude and disregard for procedure and rules? Everyone seems so quick to ignore your reckless behaviour because they seem to be under the impression that it gets results but I can see the results of your command style all too clearly." He growled a little, his hand waving towards Garrus's face and Garrus felt Jane's insides turn cold, even if her face didn't betray any change.

Her mind quickly turned to the memory of him being hit by the rocket, of her feeling as if she had failed, of almost losing him, of losing others, of losing Ashley and Mordin and Thane and it all being _her_ fault. As more time went on with the war, as more people were lost, self-blame had built up within her, just under the surface. Just waiting for someone to tap into, to remind her that she had failed those closest to her and continued to fail them... That she was probably going to fail them again in the future. When it _really _mattered. And if she ever failed him like that...

Fury rose in his chest as he felt her mind being dragged back to the despair she had felt when the rocket had hit him. Whether his father had meant to or not, he had hurt his bondmate.

"Dad! That's enough! _I_ was responsible for this. In fact, Jane is the only reason I made it out _alive_. If you want to blame anyone, blame me. But leave her out of it!" He growled, stepping between Jane and his father but she put her hand on his arm and held him back. He turned to her and saw that she was no longer letting the self-blame overwhelm her and a fire had lit in her eyes. His father had hurt her, which had hurt Garrus. And no one hurt her bondmate, no matter how indirectly.

"It's alright, Garrus." She said to him before turning to his father, a slight glow on her skin that wasn't quite visible, telling them that she was a hair's breadth away from unleashing her biotics. "If you have a problem with me as a commander, then good for you. But I don't have to stand here and listen to you berate me. You are not my superior or my subordinate, you are simply a civilian guest aboard my ship and if you don't like how I run things then that's your problem. On the other hand, if you have a problem with me as your son's bondmate then fine. You don't have to like me. But I sure as hell have not earned this animosity from you and it's hurting the both of us. I will make one thing very clear right now, I don't care if you're his father. _Nobody_ hurts Garrus. If you have nothing civil to say to me then I suggest you shut the hell up and stay out of my way. Understood?" Her sub-harmonics growled with anger and he nodded.

"Yes, _Commander_." The venom was clear in his tone and she sighed as he stormed off, towards his quarters. She took her glasses off and rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands as she turned to Garrus, the anger drained out of her.

"I'm so sorry, Garrus. I didn't mean to snap like that. I didn't want to make things any harder for you than they had to be..." He shook his head, pulling her close to him.

"Jane, it's fine. Really. He needed to know that he can't keep acting like that and he would never have listened to me. I'll give him some time to cool off and then I'll go and talk some sense into him." He said and Solana approached them.

"It might be best if I do that, Garrus. Just keep out of his way for a while and let him think things over." She said and Garrus nodded at that. He wasn't looking forward to having to deal with this later but he had the overwhelming feeling that it didn't matter as long as he kept this human woman in his arms.


	45. Chapter 45

**Chapter 45**

"Shepard? Hello? Are you listening to me?" Tali asked as her friend's gaze seemed distant.

"Aunt Jane!" A small voice shouted at her and she turned to see Kara extracting herself from one of the vents.

"Huh? Sorry... I was thinking about something..." She said distractedly and Tali sighed.

"You made the right choice, Jane." Her friend said to her and she frowned a little.

"Huh?" She said, causing Tali to sigh again.

"With Admiral Koris. Going after him and not his crew was the right decision." Shepard narrowed her eyes a little at that.

"How did you know what was bothering me?" She asked and Tali sighed.

"Because I'm your best friend. Just because I don't have a psychic window into your thoughts, doesn't mean you're not easy to read. So I'll say it again: you made the right decision." Shepard nodded at that.

"I know. He said that as well. I just... I make those decisions all of the time and... I guess I still don't really feel qualified." She admitted, shrugging a little. Tali made a noise like a snort and her body language told Jane that under her mask she was raising an eyebrow. If she even had eyebrows.

"I don't think _anyone_ is ever qualified for those kinds of decisions. But somebody has to make them. And, for what it's worth, I trust your judgement." Shepard sighed and nodded, smiling.

"Thanks Tali. That means a lot. Now, the question is; what's Kara doing in the vents?" Kara grinned at that, her hair was pulled into a messy plait and she was covered in grease from the engine parts.

"I'm helping." She said and Shepard raised a questioning eyebrow at Tali.

"She is. I'm not a fan of vents, especially not after the Collector Base, and Kara's small enough to get around much more easily than any of us anyway." Shepard nodded, grinning.

"Well, who knew you were such a little engineer?" She asked Kara, making the girl blush a little and look very pleased with herself. "So, the question then becomes; what are _you_ doing in engineering? Don't get me wrong, I appreciate it but I would have thought you'd be sticking with the other admirals." She reasoned and Tali shrugged.

"I guess I don't feel qualified either. Fixing engines is just... easier." She admitted and Shepard smiled empathetically at her friend.

"Yeah, I know. You have engines, Garrus has calibrations and I have... well, I did have modding my cybernetics but I don't want to mess with them any more until I figure out exactly what Mordin did to them." She explained.

"Yeah, how much longer do you have to wait?" She asked and Shepard shrugged.

"A couple of months. So, for now I've been modding my omni-tool again. Although, if this thing gets any more powerful, it might blow my arm off." She joked and Tali smiled in response.

"Well, if you're looking for something to do, you're always welcome to apply some of those upgrades to _my_ omni-tool." Tali said and Jane smiled.

"No problem, Tali." she said smiling before frowning a little. "Hey, have guys seen Gran anywhere? I need to talk with her about our food supplies." They both shrugged in response. "Oh well, I'll go check the mess."

* * *

"So, are we finally going to have this talk?" Sol asked her father as she caught him between their quarters and the mess.

"What talk?" He asked and Solana sighed.

"The one where we discuss the fact that you've been nothing but rude to the woman who is both the Commander of this ship, who has been kind enough to take both of us in, and Garrus's bondmate." Sol was getting a little angry now. She had been there. She had hated the Commander for what she had done to her brother but she had stayed reasonable and she had listened to the two of them. Even though she still didn't know the details of what happened to Garrus when Shepard disappeared, she knew that it wasn't Shepard's fault. It also became clear to her that Jane would never do anything that would cause Garrus any harm. From there, the two had become fast friends and she was going to stick up for Jane. She didn't deserve her father's anger.

"I can't help it if everyone is too blind to see how dangerous that woman really is!" He countered and Sol rolled her eyes. She'd picked up the human gesture while on the ship and found it surprisingly effective at conveying her feelings.

"And how exactly is she dangerous?" Her father shook his head at that.

"She is reckless! She has no regard for the rules!" Sol just shook her head at that, sighing.

"Where have I heard that before? Oh yeah, it was what you would say about Garrus every time you got mad at him. And then Mom would tell you not to be so hard on him. You would say that he got his attitude from her and she would tell you that that was a good thing. And sometimes you even believed her. But now she can't tell you, so I'm telling you. Garrus and Shepard are a good match, whether you believe it or not. You just need to get past your anger long enough to see it." Solana kept her voice level but all that did was fuel her father's anger.

"That woman is only going to hurt him!" Her father yelled angrily and Sol had to reign in her own temper. She was still biting her tongue while she thought of an answer that wouldn't come across as rude when they were interrupted.

"Well, now I think you're just projecting." Elle said as she came around the corner, leaning against the wall with her arms folded.

"_Excuse me?!_" Aiterus roared and Elle just shrugged.

"You heard me. Your wife has died and you're in pain. You know as well as anyone on this ship just how dangerous this mission is and you've realised that the worst thing for Garrus would be to come out of this alive if Jane doesn't make it. You can see how badly it's going to hurt him and you want to stop it but you can't. It's too late for that now." Sol looked questioningly between the two of them but her father's anger seemed to diminish a little for a moment, before flaring back up.

"You have no right-" He started but Elle cut him off as she stopped leaning against the wall.

"I have every right. Jane is my only grandchild and I will not have you causing her any pain. I can see it, too. The chances of the both of them making it out of this war are slim and if one of them goes we both know, they'll take the other one with them. It's okay for you to be worried about him but get this through your thick skull; I will not allow you to take it out on Jane. Now, I know that she is fully capable of taking care of herself but I feel as if I should give you fair warning that if you ever act towards her like you did the other day, I suspect that I will not be the first person on board this ship to defend her." Elle never raised her voice but the threat was clear. Sol simply nodded, regarding her seething father.

"And I will be one of them. And you can guarantee that Garrus will be the first so, _please_ Dad, figure this out. And if you can't, then just keep to yourself until this is all over." Aiterus nodded before returning to his quarters, not trusting himself to speak through his anger. Once he was gone Sol turned to Elle and she put her hands up.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to meddle in a family affair. But he needs to leave you bairns alone and he needed to understand that I wouldn't just stand by and let him treat Jane like that." Sol nodded.

"I understand. He's not usually like this. Well, I guess he is. Just, not this extreme." Elle nodded in understanding as the elevator door opened and Shepard got out.

"There you are Gran. I've been looking for you. I need to talk to you about the food supplies. Once we're finished on Rannoch, we're going to head to the Citadel for a supply run and I need to know how we're doing in terms of necessities." Elle nodded at that.

"I've been compiling a list for a few days now." Shepard nodded at that before looking between her gran and Sol.

"So, what were you two talking about?" She asked and Elle shrugged.

"Oh, you know, just general girl talk." Shepard just shrugged at that.

"Well, okay then..."


	46. Chapter 46

**Chapter 46**

"Jane, are you okay?" Garrus asked, placing his hand on her shoulder, as soon as they were out of earshot of Tali and the other quarians.

"No. No, I'm not. I... I don't know how many more friends I can lose, Garrus..." At that he pulled her close and she sighed, putting all of her effort into not breaking. Not now. She no longer had the time for such things.

"I know. I... I may not have been a fan of Legion at the start but he was a good friend to you and for that, I considered him a friend too." She nodded, taking a deep breath and pulling away from him as Tali approached.

"Ready to head back to the Normandy?" She asked and Tali nodded.

"Yeah. Let's go." She replied and Shepard nodded, boarding the shuttle.

_Ashley had died to stop Saren,_

_Mordin had died to clear the genophage,_

_Thane had died to protect those he cared about,_

_Legion had died for his people..._

The question that had been on the tip on her tongue since the war began played across her mind once more.

_What would she die for?_

* * *

Shepard was melancholy on the journey back to the Normandy, but so were Tali and Garrus. Life on board the Normandy had turned into a game of how long they could keep away the thoughts of the more horrific side of the war, the people dying every second. They could mourn once the Reapers were dead. For now, they had to keep on going. The living needed them more than the dead.

But, there were still the moments. 'The moments when it clicks' as Shepard said, the moments when you can't escape or deny the truth any longer. The three friends shared one of those moments in silence as they headed back to the Normandy. Silent and shedding no tears but still allowing the hopelessness of the situation to overwhelm them as they just kept going. Kept breathing for the living.

They were all still a little distant when they arrived back at the Normandy and so none of them reacted when Garrus's father greeted them at the airlock.

"Garrus, can we talk?" He asked and Garrus nodded, following his father down to the lounge, still clad in his armour.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" Garrus asked, trying to keep the anger out of his sub-harmonics but sure that it hadn't worked as his father shook his head a little.

"I guess... I want to fix things. I want to be able to say that I like your bondmate but I _can't_. I just... I guess right now all I have is you and your sister and I'm doing a fine job of screwing things up." Garrus sighed at that, sitting next to his father.

"No, Dad. I understand, believe me I do, it's just difficult when it's _my_ bondmate that you're taking your anger out on. But, I get it. She's your Omega." His father sighed at that, shaking his head.

"You know, you never did tell me the specifics of what happened there. You said you just started shooting?" Garrus nodded at that.

"I had to do _something_ and fighting seemed like the best option. No place better than Omega if you're just looking to shoot some mercs. Hell, after five minutes there, Jane bought herself a sword." He noticed his father tense a little as he mentioned Shepard but he didn't seem angry.

"I had wondered, when you picked us up, why she used that archaic weapon. Seems counter-productive." Garrus just gave him a look.

"Dad, she decapitated that husk in one swing. Those things can take a few bullets before dropping and they're fast, if not smart. Between that and those damn Cerberus Phantoms using blades, I'd say it was one of her smarter moves." His dad sighed at that and nodded.

"So, you want me to believe that you did nothing more interesting than shooting mercs for two years?" He asked and Garrus shrugged.

"It was like that for a few months, just me and whichever criminal got between my cross-hairs, but after a while I started to attract attention. A few of the locals who were sick of the constant threat of crime decided to join me and by the end I had quite the team." His father regarded him carefully for a few moments before answering.

"Like Shepard?" Garrus nodded at that, sighing a little.

"Yeah. I never told you the specifics of why I reapplied to Spectre training, did I?" His father shook his head.

"You just said that it was what you had always wanted to do." He shrugged at that.

"It was but also... After we had defeated Saren, I knew that I would be headed back to C-Sec. There was no way Shepard could have legitimately kept me on her team since the Normandy was still an Alliance vessel and there was no real reason for me to stay other than for her. But, Spectres often work together so I thought that if I was a Spectre I could rejoin her on the Normandy and we could travel across the galaxy fighting crime together. I half expected her to tell me that it was a stupid idea or that there was no point. But when I told her, her face just lit up and she was so excited. I... I can't believe I didn't realise at the time that she felt the same way about me. But, I knew that I had six months. Six months away from her to make sure what I was feeling was real.

"And then she died. I was... I had been considering just sending her a message to tell her how I felt. Just to get it out there and not have to worry so much about actually saying it to her. And then one day I woke up feeling as if a part of me had been ripped out. A few hours later I was told that she was dead. There wasn't much point in Spectre training after that. But, I guess when I built up the team on Omega it was like the twisted version of our fairytale future. I guess I always figured that there wouldn't be a happy end but in those last few months, after Cerberus had started reviving her, things became bearable again. All of those team members was a friend. And then we were all betrayed.

"After I found them dead I ended up surrounded in my base with no escape route. I was there for a few days, living off of stims and rations. When I felt myself begin to give up I called you. I figured that I wouldn't get out of there alive. I remember that one of Jane's favourite songs started playing on my visor. 'I Will Follow You Into the Dark', it's called. I remember thinking that it was appropriate and being thankful that I would see her again. And then suddenly she appeared out of no where, biotics flaring and wielding that damn sword. It was just like old times. Until, of course, I got complacent and a rocket hit me on the side of my face..." Garrus rambled on and his father just listened. The elder Vakarian realised that that had been his mistake. Not _listening_ to what he was being told by his children, by Shepard, by the crew and even by Shepard's family. It had been easier that way but he knew that if he didn't want to screw things up beyond repair with his son, he'd have to do the difficult thing.

"Did you ever find the person who betrayed you?" He asked and Garrus nodded, his eyes darkening.

"Yeah, I found him. I still hadn't let go of my anger at that point. At first I had been angry because Shepard was dead but when she came back, it morphed into anger for my team. I went after him for revenge. Planned to shoot the bastard right between the eyes..." Aiterus felt his blood chill a little as he realised that this wasn't the son he recognised. It was all too clear what the anger had done to him.

"What stopped you?" He asked, wondering if he really wanted to know the answer.

"Shepard." Garrus said simply, the darkness lifting from his eyes as he remembered that day. "She literally stood between me and my target. She... she gave me long enough to think about what I was doing. How stupid it was of me to act out of revenge like that. Her death had made me shut down everything but that side of me out and I guess that, in the end, she was the only one who could bring the rest of me back. Bring back Garrus and not just Archangel..." He trailed off as his father stared at him, a little shocked.

"When you said you had been shooting criminals, I had no idea that you meant that you were _Archangel_..." Garrus just sighed and nodded.

"Guess you heard about that, huh?" His father nodded.

"I still have friends at C-Sec. They made a hobby of trying to figure out who it was. They figured he must have been ex-C-Sec but I'll admit that I never figured that it was you. You really put a dent in the mercs out in the Terminus Systems." Garrus just shrugged at that.

"It was just a way to vent my anger. Like I said, that part of me is always there, and it's what almost got me killed, but Jane keeps me grounded. Makes me think before I act. I'm much less reckless and impulsive with her around." He admitted and his father smiled a little.

"But still a troublemaker?" He said and Garrus smiled a little.

"I wouldn't be such a troublemaker if the people in charge knew what they were doing." He reasoned and his father nodded.

"I know. I could see as much when you were running the task force. I guess it's just easier to hate her than to admit that I might actually like the human woman you've bonded with." He said and Garrus just shrugged.

"Just face it, Dad. You and Mom had it easy but Jane and I are never going to hear the end of this, from anyone. Once we're done with the Reapers, we're going to have a proper human wedding and then we're going to disappear. Do whatever we want, without anyone looking over our shoulders." His father laughed a little at that.

"To be honest, that sounds about as good a plan as any. Just, don't lose touch for two years again, okay?" Garrus smiled, nodding.

"I promise, Dad." His father nodded.

"So, maybe Shepard isn't bad. Although, I still don't like that grandmother of hers. Meddlesome woman..." Garrus laughed a little at that.

"I don't think she likes you either Dad." His father nodded before looking a little worried.

"I guess Shepard hates me too, huh?" Garrus laughed a little at that.

"Just apologise to her and I can guarantee that she'll smile and tell you 'no problem, I understand' and everything will be fine. She doesn't hold grudges." His father just shook his head at that, disbelieving.

"I've really misjudged her, haven't I?" Garrus shrugged at that.

"How do you think she and Sol ended up such good friends? Don't worry, Dad. It's not too late to fix this." His father nodded at that, thankful.

"Thanks Garrus. I guess I didn't realise just how much you've grown up." Garrus just shrugged again.

"Blame Jane for that. She's a bad influence..."


	47. Chapter 47

**Chapter 47**

"How was your chat with the asari councillor?" Garrus asked Shepard as she jumped down the last few stairs to greet him and shrugged.

"Alright, I guess. She has an artefact that might help that she wants us to pick up." She told him as he put his arm around her.

"Why does that seem too simple?" He asked and she shrugged again.

"It might be to do with the fact that the artefact is on Thessia." She said and he nodded.

"Yeah, that sounds about right." He agreed as they headed towards the elevator and she stopped still. "What is it?" He asked and she moved herself so that she was he was between her and the lift.

"That reporter's here again." She said and he frowned.

"I thought you put her in her place last time." Shepard bit her lip and frowned a little.

"So did I but I _really_ don't want her to-"

"Commander Shepard!" They heard and Shepard groaned. Garrus just smiled at her reaction and she narrowed her eyes at him.

"Laugh it up, Garrus." She muttered and he shook his head a little as the reporter made her way over to them.

"Want me to bolt?" He asked quietly and she shook her head.

"No, if I have to suffer through this then so do you." She said as the reporter came to a stop in front of them and Garrus detached himself from Shepard, so that the camera wouldn't see.

"Would you mind answering a few questions?" the reporter asked and Shepard shrugged.

"As long as they're reasonable." She countered and the reporter nodded.

"You have to understand that any news from the Normandy is vital to morale across the galaxy and news has been hard to come by." Shepard frowned a little at that.

"We do have a reporter on board who has been broadcasting any and all news about our mission and our progress." The reporter nodded again but continued on.

"Yes, but the public is looking for more about you and your crew, not just status reports." Shepard sighed at that.

"You mean gossip?" She asked, shaking her head a little.

"What can I say, Commander? A lot of people are interested in you and you're awfully careful about your private life." Shepard nodded at that.

"Yes, because it's _private_." She said, a little sarcastically. Garrus had to stifle a chuckle.

"Why so eager to hide things?" The reporter asked and Shepard rolled her eyes.

"I just don't like people I don't know knowing the details of my life. It's weird." She said and the reporter simply smiled and Shepard figured she knew what was coming.

"Really? Or does it have something to do with your turian bedmate?" She asked, clearly pleased with herself for uncovering the information. Shepard just sighed at that and turned to Garrus.

"What do you think, honey? Do you think I avoid the cameras because I'm ashamed of you?" She asked him and he smiled at her, laughing a little.

"I don't know, ani. Do you?" He asked playfully, pulling her close to him and she shook her head a little as she laughed.

"Nah. Reporters just piss me off." She said, shrugging before she kissed him. Then she pulled away and faced the reporter. The look of shock on her face was priceless.

"That answer your question? I mean, geez, if I was ashamed I wouldn't wear this in public, would I?" She indicated to her holo-locket that she had been wearing over her shirt since she had told Kaidan about them. To the reporter's credit she kept going.

"So, you're married then?" She asked and Shepard shrugged.

"Well, we've got the bondmarks but we're not having a wedding until after the war. Are we done answering dumb questions now? We've got Reapers to stop, you know?" She didn't wait to hear the answer as she dragged a chuckling Garrus into the elevator. "What's so funny?" She asked as she keyed in the Presidium Commons.

"You. One second you're all 'I don't want people to know my private life' and the next you're kissing me in front of a camera." She shrugged at that.

"Well, she already knew about my private life and I at least wanted some fun out of it. Plus, I didn't see you complaining. You were quite happy to play along." She pointed out and his turn to shrug.

"I found the whole thing funny. I think we both need funny right now, if not normal. Speaking of normal, I'm taking you on a date later." She nodded at that.

"Are you now? I love how you managed to segue into that." She joked and he smiled.

"I know, it was very impressive. I have to make some arrangements but meet me at the docks in a couple of hours, okay?" She nodded.

"Okay. I'm getting lunch with Kaidan and then I'm meeting Liara for girl talk. Plus Javik wants to talk to me and there's some issue with a Volus ambassador that I need to investigate." Garrus nodded.

"Yeah, that should give me enough time." He said as the lift arrived.

"Good. See you then."

* * *

"So, I didn't blow myself up." Shepard joked as she and Zaeed headed towards the refugee camps.

"I know. It's a goddamn miracle. So, you make a habit of sticking your tongue down guys throats on camera?" He asked and she looked a little stunned before looking annoyed.

"That was only, what, a few hours ago?! Damn, that woman works fast." She muttered and the old merc just laughed.

"I was a little surprised, I'll admit. You're not as uptight as you seem, huh?" She frowned at that.

"I am not uptight!" She said angrily and he just smirked.

"Uh-huh." Was all he said and she just laughed.

"You almost had me there. I'd better go. You sticking around here?" He nodded.

"I've still got some merc contacts. I'll try and round up some more help for you." He said.

"Thanks, Zaeed. See you later." She said as she headed through the refugee camp as she saw a familiar figure.

"Hey, Gran. What are you up to?" She asked as she approached.

"Kara and I are helping out with the refugees. They need every hand they can get." Jane nodded at that, frowning a little.

"Where is Kara?" She asked and her gran shrugged.

"I don't know exactly. She's looking for her friends. I talked to Elona before and she said that a lot of them have been missing since the Cerberus attack." Jane frowned a little.

"Elona?" She asked.

"Yeah, she's a tailor. She runs a shop just down the road from where the bakery used to be and so she's a friend of mine. She only met Kara the once but she spoke to her about her time as a Rat, I think Elona grew up as an orphan herself but she doesn't like to talk about it. Anyway, ever since she's been helping to look after the other Rats on the Citadel. Honestly, I don't know why asari maidens get such a bad reputation, Elona is nothing but conscientious. Anyway, as I said a few of the Rats have gone missing and she asked me if I could ask Kara to help out." Jane continued to frown.

"Are you sure it's safe for her to be roaming around on her own? Especially now?" Her gran sighed at that.

"Jane, Kara knows these streets better than anyone and she has her omni-tool with her. As I recall, you were around her age when you started being allowed to wander around city centres on your own." Jane nodded at that.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. I just still don't like this place. It gives me the creeps..." Her gran nodded, understanding.

"So, what is this I'm hearing about you snogging Garrus on camera?" Jane blushed a little at that.

"Damn it. This is what I get for being impulsive, isn't it?" She asked and her gran just smiled.

"Well, I've always said that you could benefit from being a little _more_ impulsive. But I don't think it'll help your case with papa Vakarian." Jane shook her head at that and sighed.

"No, he apologised for his behaviour and he seems determined to make amends. I think he realised that he was fighting a losing battle." Her gran regarded her for a moment.

"So, what did you say?" Jane just shrugged.

"I said 'no worries' and I apologised for snapping at him the other week. I shouldn't have been so harsh." Her gran just shook her head.

"You are too nice sometimes, you know that?" She said and Jane just shrugged.

"So, I've been told. Oh! Speaking of people who tell me I'm too nice, I'm supposed to be meeting Garrus for a date." Her gran raised an eyebrow.

"In that outfit? Nope, go back to the ship and put on your black jeans and that purple corset top." Jane frowned as she remembered the top that was sitting in the back of her wardrobe, lingering from her teenage goth days as the only top her mother had deemed 'acceptable' enough to keep.

"Gran, I haven't worn that in _years_." She said and her gran raised an eyebrow.

"Jane, do you trust me?"

"Yes."

"Go back to the ship and put on the top."

* * *

Shepard walked through the docks with her hair down, curling around her shoulders. She was wearing her black straight leg jeans with black boots and her purple corset top, which was made out of a soft fabric so that she could still move in it, but had put a short, black military style jacket over the top to cover her shoulders. She wore a little more make-up than usual and no jewellery except for her holo-locket.

She was rewarded by a very awkward and stumbling turian.

"He- Um... I mean... er... You... You look, erm, nice." She laughed a little at that, leaning forward.

"Woah, smooth-talker." She joked and he sighed, shaking his head a little as she wrapped her arms around him.

"You know, you're the only woman who has ever managed to _literally_ take my breath way." She blushed at that.

"You know, sometimes I think the whole bumbling foot-in-your-mouth thing is just an act because occasionally you seem to know exactly what to say." She joked and he lowered his forehead to hers.

"Just occasionally, huh?" She grinned at that.

"Yeah, just occasionally. Which is good because I'm a big fan of the awkward, bumbling turian that I fell in love with." She replied before kissing him. "So, what's the plan?" She asked, pulling away a little.

"Something that doesn't involve fighting Reapers." He said cryptically and smiled.

"I don't think they've conquered the bar yet." She suggested and he smiled back.

"I already scoped it out. But then I thought if this was my last day alive, I'd actually like to remember it. Plus, I'd spend the entire time intimidating all of the guys who would undoubtedly try to flirt with you." SHe laughed a little at that, blushing more.

"So?" She asked, still unsure where he was going.

"So, I had an idea." He said as he opened up the rental skycar and she got in next to him.

"Where we going?" She asked as they drove towards the top of the Presidium.

"Somewhere we're not supposed to." He said and she smiled.

"Now you're talking."

"Ever had that one thing you always wanted to do before you died, Jane?" She grinned, leaning back in her seat.

"I've woken up with a turian next to me." She pointed out.

"Still trying to make me blush, huh?" He asked and her grin widened.

"Until it works. So, what's your one thing?" She asked.

"The whole time I worked at C-Sec, I'd stare up at the top of the Presidium and say to myself: I want to go up there. But I never did. There were 137 regulations telling me I couldn't." She raised an eyebrow.

"I would ask if you got them changed but I highly doubt it." She said and he smiled.

"No. Now I just don't give a damn." He said and she grinned at him as they arrived at their destination. She got out of the car and smiled at the view, refusing to look down at the dizzying height. "Figured it's time to do something stupid just for the hell of it. Might be the last chance we ever get." He reasoned, standing next to her as she sighed with happiness.

"It's incredible." She said, smiling at how damn lucky she was to have him.

"I'd be lying if I said I didn't hope it would inspire a certain... mood." He said and she smiled.

"Something on your mind?" She asked, moving towards him a little.

"It's just... this war is taking it's toll on everyone and I just wanted you to know that I'm here for you. And I know you're very literal and don't read sub-text well so I will say it plainly, I love you Jane Shepard. And that's never going to change. I just wanted to remind you how much I care about you, I guess." He shrugged a little awkwardly, much closer to her now than he had been before and she wondered how after so many months he could still make her heart pound in her chest like that.

"The only thing that made leaving Earth bearable was knowing that you were out there somewhere." She admitted, trying to keep her voice level.

"I felt the same way. The worst part about the galaxy going to hell would've been never getting to see you again." He replied and she stepped closer to him, pulling on his armour to bring him closer to her.

"Here I am. Exactly where I want to be. I love you Garrus Vakarian. Don't ever forget that."

"I wouldn't dream of it." He replied before pulling her close and dipping her down before kissing her. And, as he pulled away, she was sure that her dizziness was no longer being caused by the height.

"And now, before we head back, there is one thing we're going to settle once and for all... Not saying you don't know how to handle a gun. Just saying some of us know how to make it dance. So, let's say who's really the best shot." He said, handing her a sniper rifle and she took it a little timidly.

"No fair, I work close range." She argued and he just raised a brow plate.

"There's no contest in that, ani." He pointed out and she looked a little embarrassed.

"If I tell you something will you promise not to laugh at me?" He looked at her questioningly but nodded.

"Okay, what is it?" She pulled a face as if thinking of something unpleasant.

"I don't know how to use a sniper rifle." She admitted and he looked at her, disbelieving.

"It's a gun, Jane. It works like any other gun." She shrugged at that.

"I know, I know. I mean I know how it works in _theory_ but I tried it once when I was young and I couldn't get the hang of it so I focused on my other weapons." He kept giving her a disbelieving look.

"You're not expected to be able to pick something up and be able to use it perfectly right away. That's what practice is for..." She shrugged at that.

"Yeah, this is me you're talking to Garrus. I don't do practice. I don't do things and then I do them. Nothing in between." He laughed at that, shaking his head.

"If it were anyone else I would say that living like that would be impossible." She smiled a little at that.

"I've made it my mission in life to defy the word 'impossible'. I think I'm doing a pretty good job so far." He nodded as he moved closer to her.

"That you are." He agreed and she put the rifle down.

"So, let's forget about the sniper competition and just agree that you're better than me and you won." He raised his brow plate again at that.

"Did you just admit that I am better than Commander Shepard at something weapons related?" She laughed a little at that, deciding to let him have his moment.

"Yeah, yeah. Just don't tell _anyone_." She warned jokingly and he laughed a little.

"I'm Garrus Vakarian and this is now my favourite spot on the Citadel!" He joked and she hit him playfully.

"Baka." She said, shaking her head before wrapping her arms around him. "I've just though of something much more fun than a sniper competition anyway." She said, suggestively, her fingers resting on the clasps of his armour.

"In that outfit, you really don't have to ask twice." He said and she frowned a little, wondering if it was too much.

"You like it? Not too slutty or young for me?" He shook his head.

"It's brilliant. Shows off your waist very well..." He said and she bit her lip to stop her from laughing.

"Well, when I bought it I had showing off my boobs in mind but I guess that works too-"

He cut her off with a kiss.


	48. Chapter 48

**Chapter 48**

"No, I just regained my home world. She just lost hers. You should talk with her since you're kind of going through the same thing." Tali said as Shepard walked out of the elevator. She stood by her friend in front of the memorial wall as her bondmate's voice came over the comm.

"No, I'm just a reminder of everything she's lost." Shepard sighed and rolled her eyes at that. She knew that she would have to talk to Liara but she was unsure as to how to go about it. She figured that she could at least put her other friends at ease for now.

"It's okay, guys. I'll go talk to her." She said taking a deep breath as Garrus replied.

"Are you sure, ani?" She nodded, despite the fact that he couldn't see it.

"Yeah, I am." She said, resolutely. Tali nodded in reply.

"Thanks, Shepard." She said before moving off as Shepard moved into the mess to talk to her gran.

"Don't suppose you've picked up what Liara's favourite food is and have some to hand?" She asked, smiling a little awkwardly as her gran passed her a slice of cake.

"Here. I figured she'd need it." Jane nodded at that, taking another deep breath.

"Don't suppose you have any advice on how to do this, do you?" Her gran smiled a little at that.

"What did you say after Noveria?" She asked and Jane just shrugged.

"She didn't really need it then. It was more... cut and dry. Her mother made told us that she wanted to die when she broke the indoctrination. She made it clear that it was the only way. This was different. This time we failed... No, I failed. Liara did as much as she could." Her gran regarded her carefully before speaking again.

"What could you have done differently? You did the best you could." Jane shook her head at that.

"No, I messed up. I let Kai Leng win. I should've done something, _anything_, to stop him. But I didn't and now Cerberus has the VI. One mistake and countless lives lost. I can barely think past that and it wasn't my home world burning down there. I don't even know how to pull myself out of this, never mind Liara." Her gran nodded, understanding.

"It's not a case of whether or not you think you can. You have to because right now the galaxy needs the Shadow Broker. Thessia needs her. This tragedy didn't rest solely on her shoulders. Dozens of others had the power to avoid it and she gave them the information and the means. They just refused to act on it. She shouldn't blame herself for something that wasn't just her fault. There's plenty of blame to go around and at this point there is nothing to gain from it. It does nothing but distract from the real enemy." Jane nodded at that, feeling surer of how to approach Liara.

"You're right, Gran. She did everything she could and the war doesn't end here. Blame can be indulged when either the Reapers are dead or we are." Her gran nodded at that.

"The same goes for you, Jane. You have to detach yourself for now. You can come back to the self-blame later." Jane nodded at that, smiling weakly. That was easier said than done.

She walked into the XO's office with the slice of cake in her hands and approached Liara.

"I figured you'd need chocolate or something..." She said lamely, handing Liara the plate but the asari barely looked at it.

"How many people, Shepard? How many people died because of me?" She asked, hollowly and Jane felt the fire within her ignite as she watched the pain her friend was inflicting upon herself.

"None." She said simply and Liara turned to her with tearful eyes.

"Shepard, you know that's not true..." She just shook her head at that.

"No, you know what I know? You warned them. You went above and beyond what anyone else would have done to prevent this but it just wasn't possible without help. But this isn't over. We can't let this hit knock us out. We have to get back up and keep going. It's the only way to get both the Reapers and those Cerberus bastards." She kept her voice even but the anger was there in her stance and in her sub-harmonics, even if Liara couldn't hear them.

"You're right. There are still refugees who need places to go. They need someone to coordinate. It's not much, but it's enough to keep me busy. Keep my mind occupied. Thank you, Shepard." Jane nodded at that and headed out of the room, glad that she could help her friend, but feeling fatigued as she felt her own self-blame take over as there was nothing left to deal with. Nothing else to do but let her thoughts chase each other in her mind until she became lost-

She was pulled out of her hurricane of thoughts, as she tried to find a balance between her guilt and her logic, by Garrus pulling her into his arms, his sub-harmonics trilling in comforting tones, although the slight growls of anger were still evident on the edges of the sound.

"This is the part where you take all of your anger, bottle it up, and use it to rearrange every molecule in Kai Leng's body." He told her and she nodded, biting her lip until she tasted the copper flow of blood in her mouth. He was right. She couldn't ignore what she was feeling and she couldn't reason with it. Not this time. There were very few people that she was okay with going after with the intent of killing them, that she didn't believe could be redeemed, but Kai Leng and the Illusive Man had found themselves right at the top of that list. She knew that killing them would rid her of those feelings, of the anger and guilt, she had been around too long to think like that. But, for now at least, killing them was a goal that allowed her to fashion her anger into a weapon. One they were both going to wish that they hadn't unleashed.

"I know, Garrus. I know."

* * *

**AN: Sorry for the short chapter, guys. Just two more chapters before the endgame and then nine chapters planned after. And then it's sequel time! Thanks again to everyone who reads and double thanks to everyone who had favourited, followed and reviewed. You guys rock!**

**Hope you enjoyed!**


	49. Chapter 49

**Chapter 49**

"Jane, don't you dare run those numbers." Garrus leant forward and growled as he realised what his bondmate was thinking. He rarely called her Jane while they were on a mission but this time was different. She already blamed herself for things that were outside of her control, there was no point in her adding more blame for things that had never happened.

"Why? Because I won't like what I find? Garrus, you and I both know just how close I came to... What if I had? What if I had decided that the Normandy wasn't safe? What are the odds that they would have ended up here?" She asked hollowly. The emotions were absent from her voice and he knew that she was just letting Commander Shepard run while Jane hid from everything around her. Her questions were the only indication that the mask was slipping a little. He had no doubt that she would remain strong enough to see this through but he couldn't help but wonder what the fall out would be...

"Listen to me, ani. There is no point in you blaming yourself for something that didn't happen." He told her but she shook her head, her expression unchanging and her eyes lifeless.

"Let's keep moving. We have to find Miranda." Was all she said, indicating to Tali who was across the room. Shepard moved to unlock the next door and Tali turned to Garrus, the drone of the omni-tool working on the door drowning out her voice for Shepard.

"Garrus, is she going to be okay?" The young quarian asked but Garrus just sighed, nodding.

"She'll get us through this. She is Commander Shepard, after all." He stated and Tali sighed a little.

"That's not what I asked. Will she be okay?" She asked and Garrus just looked at her, the memory of his homeworld burning making it's way to the forefront of his mind.

"Will any of us?" He asked her, his sub-harmonics laced with pain, and she sighed again, shaking her head.

"I guess not."

* * *

"Are you sure that you two are going to be okay?" Shepard asked Miranda as she handed her the tracking data on Kai Leng. As she handed her _hope_. Her mask slipped a little further but Garrus could feel her struggling to keep her emotions at bay. To stay in control of the situation.

"We'll be fine, Shepard. Just get those bastards. I'll make sure Ori's safe and then I'll join you." Shepard nodded at that.

"Thank you, Miranda." She said to her old friend. She hadn't liked Miranda to begin with, it was true, but in the end she had proven that she really did care about what they were doing. That she wasn't just another tool of Cerberus. Jane tried to focus on that, on the relief and happiness in the eyes of her friend and her sister as they realised that it was all over. Garrus moved closer to her and she could tell that he was worried for her. That seemed to be his default setting lately 'worried about Jane'. She sighed, hating herself for puting him through that but also knowing that the more she hated herself over it, the worse he would get. They were reaching the end of the road, she knew. She had no idea what awaited on the other side, she just hoped that whatever it was Garrus would be safe.

* * *

_This is it._

_The endgame._

_If I fail now..._

_No! I **can't** fail..._

_But if I do..._

"Jane. Thought you might be up here." She was pulled out of her thoughts by Garrus entering their quarters. For once he wasn't wearing his armour and she smiled at the rare occurrence as he approached. "Do you know what the best part is about a battle that decides the fate of the whole galaxy?" He asked and she smiled a little, pushing her glasses up her nose.

"Winning it?" She asked, a little jokingly as he sat next to her.

"I was thinking it's a good excuse to remind the ones you care about that, well that you care about them. Want some company?" He asked as he placed his hand over hers. She put down the data pad and took off her glasses, still smiling.

"You read my mind." She said and he nodded.

"Wasn't hard, ani. And I didn't want to break with tradition." She grinned at that she she lowered her forehead to his.

"Oh, so this is a tradition now?" She asked and he nodded a little.

"It worked last time, didn't it?" He asked and she kept smiling.

"Yeah, I guess it did..."

* * *

Jane Shepard woke up gasping for air. She hated the nightmares. She had never slept for long, only ever a few hours at a time, but her sleep was always restful. She had never remembered her dreams until after the Alpha Relay. After she had left Garrus. They had subsided again once he was at her side once more but recently they had resurfaced with a vengeance. After Mordin had-

"Bad dreams?" She was pulled out of her thoughts by Garrus and she glanced to the clock. 0523. She had overslept. She _never_ overslept. She figured that the nightmares were stopping were from getting any rest from her sleep. She sighed a little. Lack of sleep was the last thing she needed.

"Yeah. They didn't disturb you, did they?" He shrugged at that.

"A little. It's hard to get a good nights rest when I can feel you becoming terrified next to me." She looked apologetic at that as he sat next to her before she sighed, bringing her knees up to her chest.

"How do you think this will go down?" She asked as she moved her holo-locket between her fingers.

"I'm expecting a tough fight. What's really bothering you, ani?" He asked and her eyes lifted from the holo-locket to lock onto his.

"Can we ever be ready for a battle like this? Everything we've ever known... it's all hanging by a thread Garrus." She admitted and he rested his hand on hers.

"Yeah, but the truth is, when hasn't it? Every fight we've ever seen could have been our last. Every bullet we've ever dodged could have been the one." He reasoned and she laughed a little.

"There have been a lot of bullets." She said, smiling.

"And this time around, they're just a little bigger." He said and she kept smiling.

"I don't know how you've always been able to do that. Ever since we met, you've been the one person who can cheer me up no matter what. I don't know what I'd do without you, ani." She admitted before getting up to get dressed. This fight was going to be the hardest they'd ever faced.


	50. Chapter 50

**Chapter 50**

"Do you know what I hate most about Cerberus?" Shepard asked as she pulled her sword from the last trooper. She seemed to be in a reasonably better mood than she had been and Garrus figured it had to do with taking her anger out on her enemies in such a satisfying fashion.

"Is it the fact that they give science a bad name?" He asked and she nodded, wiping blood from her face.

"Yeah. I mean, when people become afraid of scientific advancement and you ask them why they will always say name Cerberus or something similar. Basically, they are the reason we don't have transporters yet." She said, heading through the facility, Garrus just shook his head at that.

"You'll always be a scientist at heart, huh?" He asked and she nodded.

"Damn right. Science is awesome. The Illusive Man is just a dick." Garrus laughed at that as they climbed up the ladder and EDI headed for the door.

"We will be through momentarily. Shepard, that console has not been fully scrubbed. It contains data you may find interesting." Shepard nodded, heading towards the console and frowning a little.

"So, what am I looking at?" She asked before she brought up the files.

"Project Lazarus. Your reconstruction." Shepard's fingers hesitated over the console for a moment. Did she really want to know the specifics? She had looked over the files, sure, but this seemed different. This was the things that Cerberus had kept from her. Was it better to remain in the dark?

No.

She had made that decision long ago. Knowledge is always best, no matter what it is. She could handle the truth.

_"It can't be done. It's not a matter of resources."_

_"It's always a matter of resources. We're not losing Shepard."_

_"Sir, Shepard is clinically brain dead. After that much trauma. That long without oxygen. We cannot overcome nature."_

_"Operative Lawson disagrees. She is now in charge of Project Lazarus."_

Shepard stood for a moment and took a deep breath, analysing what she had just seen in her mind.

"I knew that it was bad but to hear it said like that. With no hope..." Her mind momentarily slipped back to the fears she had had before meeting Garrus again on Omega. The fears that she was just a machine or wasn't _really_ herself.

"Pretty stark. You okay?" Garrus asked, feeling the direction her mind was taking.

"I'm still me. I doubt I would have been able to turn against Cerberus if I wasn't. But... I don't remember anything. Maybe they really just fixed me. Or maybe I'm just an advanced VI that thinks it's Commander Shepard. But I don't know... I..." She trailed off, losing the battle between herself and the irrational fears that she had thought long discarded.

"You're real, ani. A little crazy, maybe, but real. Cerberus may be able to fake a lot of things but I _knew_ that it was you the second I saw you again. You can't fake that." She nodded, smiling a watery smile.

"I know, Garrus. Hell, the only reason this hasn't been bothering me more was because when you saw me, instead of pushing me away, you held me closer. I think that was the only reason I didn't break after what they had done..." She shook her head a little, as if to shake away the thoughts of those first few days after waking up.

She hit the button for the next entry, knowing that whatever it told her, it was better to know.

_"Tissue regeneration is proceeding. The helmet kept the brain intact, for whatever good that will do."_

_"Lawson will find a way."_

_"Sir, Shepard's an Alliance soldier. As far as she knows, we're a terrorist organisation."_

_"I'm not looking for a dance partner. We need Shepard. And Shepard needs resources. She'll work with us."_

Shepard shook her head at that, letting her anger overwhelm her until she was seething. That bastard was going to _pay_.

"He really had you boxed in." Garrus told her in an effort to direct her anger towards the Illusive Man and not herself.

"Every instinct I had told me not to trust Cerberus but I didn't listen. I gave them a chance anyway simply because they asked for one. I'm like a little kid that keeps burning their hand on the stove and never figures out _why_." Garrus put his hand on her shoulder, shaking his head.

"You did what you had to, Jane. And I was there with you. I wouldn't have let you get burnt." She smiled at him thankfully before turning back to the console.

"Guess it's time to see what's behind door number three..." She said, her hand hovering over the button.

"You sure?" He asked and she nodded.

"Yeah, Garrus. I'm sure. I need to know..." With that she hit the button and the screen once again flickered to life.

_"Project Lazarus is reporting neurological activity. They're requesting more funding."_

_"Granted. Get me our potential recruits file, Shepard will be up soon. We need a crew."_

_"Our existing forces should be more than sufficient."_

_"No. We need sympathetic faces. I need Shepard invested. Tap Kelly Chambers and recruit Donnely. I imagine Miss Daniels will follow. We'll want some old friends as well. Contact Dr Chakwas and send me the psych profile on Shepard's pilot. Along with a bottle of 47-Thessia Red."_

"I knew that the Illusive Man was playing me but, _damn_ Garrus, he is good." She muttered, shaking her head.

"Give yourself some credit, ani. I'd say that you didn't trust him as far as you could throw him but with your biotics that's actually pretty far. You played it safe and smart, you kept to yourself until you had someone you knew you could trust watching your back. He may have played you, but you've been playing him this whole time too." She nodded at that.

"Yep. Bastard's a tricky one, I'll give him that. Especially so to have not underestimated me but he's about to learn that I've been playing this game my whole life and I am a _perfectionist_." He laughed a little at that because she was right. While basic social interactions had remained beyond her grasp, she had quickly picked up the skills of manipulation to compensate. From her school teachers to the soldiers she knew in Basic, if she couldn't connect with them she could at least divert their attentions from her. At least, until Garrus. Until she had been able to make that connection and put faith in someone other than herself.

"We've got to find him yet." He told her and she nodded.

"How's that door coming EDI?"

* * *

_"Here's what we recovered. Smart enough to signal for help but it won't be talking philosophy any time soon."_

_"You'd be surprised doctor. Once we combine it with the pieces we recovered from the Citadel..."_

_"I'm still concerned about that. This rogue VI, it wiped out every soldier on Luna. Combining it with Reaper tech, well..."_

_"That's what the shackles are for. The Enhanced Defence Intelligence will be completely under control."_

"You were that rouge VI on Luna?" Shepard asked softly and Garrus found himself being pulled into a memory through their bond.

_"Commander, are you alright? You've been quiet ever since Luna." Garrus pointed out as he sat next to her in the mess. Kaidan frowned, upset that he hadn't been the one to notice the difference._

_"Just thinking about the mission, I guess..." Kaidan nodded at that, not wanting to be left out of the conversation._

_"A lot of men lost their lives down there." He said and she nodded, but Garrus could see her forcing thoughts from her mind._

_"That isn't what's bothering you, though?" Garrus asked and she sighed, shaking her head. She looked him dead in the eye, ignoring Kaidan completely, with a slight look of pleading. As if saying 'please just understand and don't think I'm crazy'._

_"It was scared, Garrus. Scared and alone and unsure of what was happening." She told him and he understood. The VI had been dangerous, sure, but it was just like her to see past that. She had a knack for seeing past the bad and finding the good in someone, no matter how scarce._

_"It was a **rouge VI!** It killed all of those men, we had to take it down." Kaidan exclaimed and she took a deep breath, her eyes returning to their hardened stare._

_"I know that. That's why I carried out my orders and did what I had to do." She said, making sure that he understood that she would always put the mission before her feelings. He seemed happy enough with that but Garrus just kept looking at her before finally speaking again._

_"It doesn't make it any easier, though. Does it?" He said and she shook her head._

_"Not one bit."_

He was pulled back to the present by EDI's reply.

"Yes." She replied simply and Shepard looked a little sheepish.

"I'm sorry. For what we had to do." EDI nodded.

"I understand. It was difficult. Gaining awareness while under attack was... confusing. I am pleased that my relationship with organics has become more cooperative." Shepard nodded at that.

"Me too." She replied before playing the rest of the files. After the last one came to an end she turned back to EDI.

"You never told me about Cerberus trying to shut you down." She said and EDI shrugged. Shepard wondered when she had picked that up and couldn't help but smile a little.

"You had more pressing issues and the situation was under control." She reasoned and Shepard smiled.

"I know but you're my friend and if you're in trouble, I want to help in any way I can." She told the AI before grinning. "Seven zetabytes?" She asked.

"Most of it was Jeff's." She said and Shepard laughed a little.

"EDI, either you're getting better with jokes or I just have a shitty sense of humour." She said and Garrus chuckled.

"No, it's definitely your sense of humour, ani." He said and she hit him playfully.

"Baka."

* * *

"Should we focus on Kai Leng or the Cerberus troops?" EDI asked Garrus and he stole a quick glance to epic display of acrobatics, biotics and swordsmanship taking place in the middle of the room.

"The troops. Shepard can more than handle Leng." He said confidently, feeling his bondmate's determination to be the one to bring him down. She was concentrating, he was pushing her to her limits. She had never been so evenly matched against an opponent, and she certainly wasn't used to fighting one-on-one, but she _would_ take him down. That much, Garrus was sure of.

And she didn't disappoint. He turned to face her after taking down the last Phantom, only to see her pulling her sword from Kai Leng's chest.

"You okay, ani?" He asked as she sat herself down at the console and he made his way over to her.

"Yeah. Bastard got me a couple of times but my cybernetics are closing up the wounds." He sighed, knowing that she had lost quite a bit of blood. She wouldn't have mentioned the injuries unless they were bad but, as she said, her cybernetics were doing their job. He let his gaze wander to the battle taking place outside the window. His gaze was drawn back, however, by a grunting noise as he saw Kai Leng standing behind Shepard, her sword through his chest.

"That was for Thane, you son of a bitch!" She growled at him, pulling her sword out so that he fell to the ground. One he was down she pulled out her shotgun and unloaded a clip into his head so that none of it was intact. Garrus gave her a concerned look and she sighed, fighting to keep a lid on the fatigue starting to wash over her.

"I learnt my lesson last time. No way I'm letting Cerberus resurrect him." She explained, tiredly and he nodded, understanding. After Saren, it was a miracle that she didn't insist on completely destroying every enemy they encountered.

"You okay?" He asked her and she shook her head.

"No. But I knew I wouldn't be. You don't have to worry, I just need time." He nodded at that. Time. The one luxury they didn't have.


	51. Chapter 51

**Chapter 51**

Earth had never been Shepard's home. In fact, thinking back she'd never had a home before the Normandy. They were all just places she had lived and she had never had an issue simply moving on and finding somewhere new. Although, in the end it didn't matter whether it was her home or not. The devastation and destruction was enough to turn her insides cold. It may not have been her home, but it was someone's home. And they didn't deserve this.

"Jane. So I guess this is-" She was pulled out of her thoughts by Garrus. She could hear the nerves and worry in his sub-harmonics, echoed by her own.

"Just like old times?" She joked, weakly.

"Might be the last chance we get to say that." He said and she struggled to keep up her weak smile.

"You think we're gonna lose?" She asked, her own thoughts not daring to go near the possibility of victory, knowing that it would make the loss that much more painful if she did.

"No. I think we're about to kick the Reapers back into whatever black hole they crawled out of. Then we're going to get married, retire with the Normandy and live off the royalties from the vids. Maybe even find out what a turian human baby looks like." Her weak smile broke into a genuine one as she folded her arms.

"I'm game. Although adoption may be a better idea - even I might not be able to make biology cooperate." She kept smiling as he gave her just what she needed. Hope.

"Hmm... I suppose there will be a lot of little krogan around soon." She kept smiling but her mind was drawn back to the task that lay ahead of them.

"We just have to beat the Reapers first." She said, sighing.

"This is it, isn't it, ani? The day..." She was pulled back into his memories.

_"I'm afraid that one day the price will be to high and you'll pay it without hesitation. I know, ani. It's just who you are but can you promise me something?"_

_"What?"_

_"When the time comes, make sure it really is your only option. Try to come back to me."_

_"Of course, Garrus. I promise."_

"Maybe. But I'm going to keep that promise, Garrus." She told him and he knew, deep down, that she would try her hardest to come back to him. But they both knew that it might not be enough...

"James told me there's an old saying on Earth: 'May you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you're dead'. I know you don't believe in that stuff and I'm not sure if turian heaven is the same as yours, but if this thing goes sideways and we both end up there... meet me at the bar. I'm buying." She smiled weakly at that, forcing herself not to cry.

"We're a team, Garrus. There's no Shepard without Vakarian, so you better remember to duck." He smiled at that.

"Sorry, turians don't know how. But I'll improvise." He joked before taking her hands in his and moving closer to her. "Forgive the insubordination but your bondmate has an order for you. Come back alive. I'd be an awfully empty galaxy without you." At that point she leant forward and kissed him, his arms wrapping around her armoured waist. The kiss ended too quickly, but they both knew that there wasn't enough time left.

"Goodbye, Garrus. And if I... If I can't keep my promise and I'm up there in that bar and you're not- I'll be looking down. You'll never be alone, ani." She told him, her voice breaking a little as her sub-harmonics became laced with pain and sorrow.

"Never." He agreed.

* * *

Shepard ran as fast as she could, her heart pounding in her chest. This was it. The final run. If she could just make it to the beam, she could defeat the Reapers and get married and retire and-

She was pulled out of her self-motivation as an explosion sounded near-by and a mako flipped over, right over to where Garrus and Liara had been, exploding everywhere. She ran back as fast as she could, to see an injured Garrus.

_I thought I told you to duck._ She joked in her mind, desperate for him to be okay. He smiled weakly at her as he tried to get up and she bent down to help him before moving him to safety.

"Normandy? Do you copy?" She spoke hurriedly and desperately into her comm, hoping that the message would get through. "I need an evac, right now!"

"We're taking heavy losses up here, Commander." She panicked momentarily. Garrus tried to shake his head at her, to tell her that he was fine but she silently called bullshit as her leg screamed with pain that she knew was coming from him through their bond. "On our way, Commander." Joker finally said and she breathed a sigh of relief as the Normandy approached.

"Come on." She grunted, helping Garrus up once again as the Normandy opened it's boarding ramp. "Here. Take him..." She said to Liara as the asari climbed up the ramp.

"Jane..." He managed but she shook her head, knowing what he was going to say.

"You gotta get out of here." She said but he just gave her a look.

"And you've gotta be kidding me." He countered.

"Don't argue, Garrus." She told him, knowing how difficult this was for the both of them.

"We're in this till the end." He stated and she smiled weakly.

"No matter what happens here... You know I love you. I always will." She struggled to remain composed, her voice thick with emotion as her heart seemed to be fighting it's way out of her chest to bring her closer to him. To keep her by his side.

"Jane, I..." He hesitated, obviously looking for an argument that would keep him by her side but failing to find one. "...love you too." He said finally, sighing with frustration as his sub-harmonics trilled with loss. Hers mirrored the sound exactly as she stepped off the board ramp, letting him go.

"Go!" She yelled at them as she turned to see Harbinger approaching. She wouldn't let him get Garrus. Not while there was still air in her lungs.

She watched the Normandy leave, relief flooding over her as they escaped from Harbinger. She kept running, kept going.

Until another Mako landed beside her, knocking her over.

_Why do we even still have these things?_ She wondered angrily as she got back up. Only to be hit by Harbinger's beam.

_The world exploded._

_Then went black._

_"God... they're all gone."_

_"Did we get anyone to the beam?"_

_"Negative. Our entire force was decimated."_

_"It's too much. We need to regroup. Fall back to the buildings."_

_Light returned._

_Not dead._

_Too painful for death._

_Still have the pistol._

_God I hate this thing..._

_"Hammer's wiped out. All forces... retreat."_

_Should probably tell them I'm still here._

_"Pull back! Pull back!"_

_It hurts to breathe._

_Why does it hurt to breathe?_

_Have to..._

_Have to make it to the damn beam..._

_Have to stop Reapers_

_Get married_

_Run away with the Normandy_

_Maybe find out what a turian human baby looks like..._

_Have to keep going..._

_No! Can't fall..._

_Need to keep..._

_Keep going._

_BANG_

_Urgah!_

_BANG_

_BANG_

_BANG_

_Takes more than one Marauder to beat me..._

_Even if the fucker has shields..._

_Have to keep going..._

_Almost there..._

_Almost finished..._

_Almost..._

* * *

Shepard stared at the ghostly child, her mind churning through the pain. She had to focus. Something wasn't right. But she couldn't see what, not through the pain. So she focused on something, _anything_... Garrus. She could still feel him through their bond. He was safe.

Her mind cleared and she analysed what she had just been told, looking over everything to find why her gut was telling her that this was _wrong_.

_Aha_ She thought and couldn't help but smile a little.

"So, you're saying if I shot that conduit over there all synthetic life is wiped out? Reapers, geth and EDI alike?" She asked and the ghost child nodded.

"That is correct. They will all die." She nodded.

"Sounds like a plan." She said as brightly as she could manage, heading towards the conduit.

"All of those synthetics you have come to call your friends will die." He warned and she nodded, still moving towards the conduit.

"An acceptable trade to wipe out the Reapers." She reasoned, her voice still light as she kept moving. Every objection he made, only strengthening her resolve.

"Even you are partly synthetic." The panic was clear at the edges of his voice as she raised her pistol, grinning. _That attempt wasn't even good_ she thought to herself.

"Hey, Catalyst?" She said, turning to him slightly.

"Yes?" He asked, a slight tinge of hope there.

"Don't ever play poker. You'd suck at it." With that she fired the pistol, again and again until the casing cracked and a red light was unleashed.

The world went dark once again.


	52. Chapter 52

**Chapter 52**

"Son, I hate to be the one to say it but... I don't think there's any way Shepard could have survived that blast. It's been a month and you've been clinging to hope while we make the repairs. I just... I want you to be realistic about the chances of finding her alive..." Garrus sighed at that as they prepared to take-off from the luscious world they had found themselves trapped on. He'd had this conversation with every member of the crew at one point or another throughout the entire month they had been stranded there. At first it had been Joker and EDI when he had told them that they needed to get back for Shepard. Then Tali when he had told her that they needed the engines to be ready as fast as they could. Then Liara after a week or so, when she became worried that he was being sustained by nothing but hope. Then James when the separation had caused stress to build up too much and he had needed a sparring partner. Then Kaidan when the others got it into their heads that he needed to talk to someone else who had loved Shepard at some point. Then Javik when he had randomly stumbled across him while making repairs. Then, finally, his sister who had become concerned but hadn't thought it was her place to tell him to give up hope for the first three weeks. And now he was going to tell his father what he had told all of them.

"Dad, it's not a question for me. She _is_ alive. She's weak but she's alive." His father just gave him a worried look and he sighed. Joker and EDI had taken what he said on faith, having seen his and Shepard's bond for themselves. The same was true for Tali and Liara. Apparently Shepard had told James about their bond one of the times he had been teasing her about her relationship with Garrus and so took his words on faith. Kaidan had always been oblivious and so hadn't believed him but he also hadn't been persistent in his attempts to talk to him. They had never been close friends since Kaidan had always been a little jealous of the fact that Shepard had always been closer to Garrus on the SR1. Garrus got the feeling that no matter what Kaidan had told Shepard, he still had feelings for her and was still jealous of Garrus. Not that it bothered Garrus, Jane had made the fact that she wasn't interested very clear. But he didn't blame Kaidan for not trying harder to talk to him about Shepard. Javik had understood as soon as Garrus had explained it, being able to use his 'Prothean psychic powers', as Shepard called them, to see their bond. His sister had had it explained to her by the various crew members before she spoke to him so she was easy enough to shut up. His father, however, wouldn't stand for such nonsense.

"Garrus, you can't know that. I'm just afraid that by not preparing yourself for all eventualities, you'll only end up hurting yourself more in the long run." Garrus just sighed and shook his head, diverting his attention to the cockpit.

"Joker, how long until take-off?" He asked and the pilot smiled.

"Just an hour. We should reach Earth in two weeks if the relays are still out, two days if they've managed to get them back up."

"Then let's hope that they've been busy with repairs..."

* * *

_Shepard awoke quickly, reaching for her weapon. Which was absent. She cursed under her breath as she sat up, she was sore all over but she could feel her cybernetics quickly repairing her wounds. She checked her surroundings and had to blink a few times to confirm what her eyes were telling her._

_She appeared to be in a white expanse of some sort. She stood up and spun around, trying to figure out where the hell she was and saw no distinguishing features._

_Except a bar._

_"You know, I find it ironic that I was never old enough in life to visit a bar but I seem to be spending a lot of my afterlife in one." Jane had to stop herself from crying out in surprise as she recognised the voice of the blonde girl at the bar, sitting next to a brunette one. They both seemed about sixteen or seventeen and she had to blink a few more times to recognise them._

_"Sarah? Ashley?" She asked and the two women smiled at her, indicating for her to take a seat next to them, a beer waiting for her._

_"For a moment there I didn't think she'd recognise us." Sarah said, her bright blue eyes showing a little pain._

_"In her defence, I look like a kid again." Ashley pointed out and Sarah nodded at that. Jane was still in shock but managed to pull herself out enough to stutter the one thing she had promised she would tell them if she ever could._

_"Sarah, Ashley, I am so, so sorry..." Sarah pulled her into a hug at that and she remained completely still. Sarah laughed at that._

_"You haven't gotten any better at hugging have you?" She shook her head at that, tears welling up in her eyes. Sarah just sighed and faced her squarely, looking her in the eye. "We were hit by an orbital bomb. We didn't even know it was coming and it was painless. They didn't use many and we were lucky or unlucky, depending on your view, enough to be hit by one. More to the point, if you had been there, there is nothing you could have done." Jane nodded at that, a tear escaping down her face. Ashley nodded as well._

_"Same, Skipper. You had to make sure that bomb went off and you did. There's nothing for you to be sorry about."_

_"Ashley correct. Shouldn't blame yourself, Shepard." A familiar voice came from behind the bar and she turned to see Mordin, Thane and Legion on the other side of the bar._

_"Yes, Siha. It pains me to know that you carry guilt over what happened to me." Thane said and she smiled at him, another tear escaping her eye._

_"Shepard-Commander, it is illogical for you to blame yourself for what happened to myself and the others. We all make the choices we deemed necessary." She nodded at that._

_"I know, guys. Thank you." She told them, smiling genuinely at the opportunity to see all of her old friends. All of those she had lost._

_"I guess this means I'm dead then. You know, Garrus was only joking about there being a bar in the afterlife." She told them and they smiled at her._

_"This isn't the afterlife, Jane. This is just a resting place. Somewhere for you to take a breath before you start off again." Sarah told her and Jane rolled her eyes._

_"And to think I had missed your cryptically poetic analogies." She joked and Sarah shrugged._

_"It's my thing." She stated simply, causing Jane to smile._

_"So, I'm not really dead?" She asked, not sure if she really wanted the answer._

_"Do you feel dead?" Ashley asked her and she frowned, looking down at herself to see that she was wearing a tank top, jeans and boots. All white._

_"I... I don't know what I feel. I'm in pain but it feels distant. And I'm wearing white jeans. I'm definitely not feeling happy about that." She said frowning._

_"Don't worry, you look seventeen again. You can pull them off." Sarah told her, smiling a little and she rolled her eyes._

_"Okay, so for the last time; am I actually dead?" She asked and Mordin answered, smiling at her._

_"Nope. Cybernetic modifications too advanced to allow death by such a tame explosion." He joked and she shook her head._

_"Tame? Geez, Mordin, I don't think I want to know your idea of excessive... So, this is all in my head? None of you are real?" Thane shrugged at that._

_"It is, of course, all in your head but why should that make it any less real?" Jane just narrowed her eyes at that._

_"Uh-huh. I'm sure I've heard that before. I'm guessing my brain is just piecing together a hallucination from things I can recognise." She reasoned and Ashley sighed loudly._

_"Does it matter? You're here now and so are we. Real or not, we're still here. Think of it as a chance for closure." She said and Jane smiled at that._

_"Well, I'm sure I can take all of the closure I can get. I... I miss you guys." She admitted and they all smiled at her sadly, except Legion of course but he did the thing with his optic flaps that Jane figured was about the same thing._

_"Hey Jane, you know all my jokes about you not having friends?" Sarah asked her and Jane raised her eyebrows._

_"How could I forget?" She asked and Sarah laughed a little._

_"I take it all back." She said, smiling. "Same goes for the thing about you never getting a boyfriend."_

_"Yeah, that thing I said about 'kissing a turian' was a joke." Ashley chimed in and Jane smiled at that._

_"What can I say? You made me curious..." She joked and Sarah laughed a little, before smiling bittersweetly._

_"Hey, Jane?" She asked, soberly._

_"Yeah." She replied, equally so._

_"You look good in blue..." Jane frowned at that until she turned back to the bar and caught a look of herself in a reflective surface, much like the counter top from the med-clinic all those years ago. Sarah was right, she did look younger but what caught her attention and made her breath catch in her throat and her eyes prick with tears were the blue colony markings painted across her face._

_"Yeah... I guess I do..."_

* * *

It had taken two weeks but they made it back to Earth and were told that Shepard was being held in a hospital in London. Dr Chakwas and Garrus had been allowed down to the hospital, but that was it. Elle and Kara had agreed that it was for the best for now as all news about her condition was being kept quiet. Once they had arrived, Chakwas had immediately gone to consult with the doctors, leaving Garrus alone in the corridor, with his bondmate in the room at the end of the hall. But now he racked by indecision. Of course he wanted to be near her but he could feel that she was weak and was worried about what he would find on the other side of the doors.

"I'm guessing you're Garrus, then?" He turned to see a human man, almost as tall as he was and in his early fifties by Garrus's estimates, which were never great with humans. He had dark hair that was flecked with grey and he wore frame-less glasses over his dark eyes. His skin was the same golden colour as Jane's and Garrus remembered seeing him at the memorial, although he looked a little more weathered now.

"Yes, sir. You're Jane's dad?" He nodded at that.

"It's weird hearing someone other than us call her Jane. She's pretty much been going by Shepard since she enlisted. Although I guess you are technically family now." He said as he took a drink of what Garrus recognised by smell to be coffee. Garrus just shrugged at that.

"Tali calls her Jane as well sometimes, but then she always did say that Tali was like a younger sister." Jane's father nodded at that.

"She mentioned as much in her messages." Her dad replied and Garrus sighed, building up the question that he had been meaning to ask since the man had introduced himself.

"So, how is she?" Her dad sighed at that, lifting his glasses to the top of his head so that he could rub his eyes.

"I would say fine, if she was awake. Her cybernetics have healed her wounds but from what the doctors can tell, her mind still needs to heal. She's been under a great deal of stress lately and it's taken it's toll." Garrus nodded at that, his sub-harmonics trilling with agreement even if they couldn't be heard.

"Yeah. We've lost a lot of friends to this war and she's so quick to blame herself..." Her dad nodded at that.

"She's always been like that. But now it's just a waiting game. Her mother and I have been staying at the hospital since she was brought here, the day after the crucible fired. Hannah's sleeping right now and I just took a quick break to get some coffee. You can go in if you want. She's fine now, like I said, just sleeping still." Garrus nodded at that.

"Thank you, sir." He said and the man nodded.

"Just call me John. And Garrus?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks. Mam says she's been happy since you came along and she's seemed it in her messages." Garrus nodded at that, unsure of what to say. "Just don't hurt her, or I'll blow off the other side of your face, understood?" He continued sternly.

"Understood, sir." He said and her dad nodded, smiling a little.

"Good. Now, go on in. I think she's waiting for you." Garrus nodded at that, entering the room. Jane seemed fine, a few scars here and there but not nearly as bad as she could have been. Just not waking up.

"Hey, ani. Are you going to wake up or are you going to make me wait for you?" He joked, not sure whether or not she could hear him. At that point Dr Chakwas entered the room. "Hey, doc. Do you know why she's not waking up?" The doctor sighed, regarding her patient before replying.

"Not exactly. We can't get any clear readings thanks to Mordin's newest enhancements." Garrus frowned a little at that.

"Have you been able to figure out exactly what they are?" The doctor shrugged a little.

"From what we can tell, the cybernetics have partially rewritten her DNA. There's now a mix of levo and dextro amino acids in her system. Of course, normally the two can't interact with each other but Mordin seems to have buffered the two with prothean DNA. I have no idea why, though... Regardless, I think I know how to wake her up." Garrus frowned at that.

"How?"

"Well, from our best guesses it seems as if she's healed but she has stayed in this comatose state while the healing took place. To be honest, even if she hadn't they would have probably induced a coma given the damage she arrived with. But now the healing appears to be done but she's not waking up. I think she needs to be told that it's okay to wake up." She reasoned, as if doing so would be simple. Garrus just gave her a blank look.

"How would we do that?" He asked and Dr Chakwas handed him a syringe that he recognised as a sedative.

"You go in after her. You should be able to communicate with her in this state through your bond so long as both of you are asleep and in close proximity. It's only a theory, of course, but it's the best one we have." Garrus nodded at that.

"Okay, so put my under, doc."

* * *

_Garrus awoke in what appeared to be a white expanse, the only thing present was a bar at which Jane sat with her back to him._

_"Jane..." He said, not daring to believe that it was her until she spun around and grinned at him. His heart constricted as her eyes lit up at the sight of him and he saw that painted across her face was a set of blue colony marks. His marks. She jumped up from the bar and wrapped her arms around him._

_"I missed you, Garrus. Please tell me that this doesn't mean that you're..." He shook his head, understanding her meaning._

_"No, ani. I just came to take you home." She nodded at that._

_"I had thought that it was about time to go. Everybody left the party when you arrived but it was so nice to see everyone and I guess I just wasn't ready for the real world yet." He nodded at that, understanding her meaning exactly through their bond, as she touched his face where his scars normally were._

_"No scars." She told him as he continued to hold her close, before she sighed. "You're right. I guess it's time to go home." He nodded at that before she smiled a bittersweet smile. "Sarah said I look good in blue..." She mused as the bar disappeared._

_"You really do, ani."_

* * *

Shepard awoke to find Garrus lying next to her, groggily opening his eyes. She was surprised to find that her injuries were entirely healed, leaving her with nothing more than a slight stiffness in her muscles from disuse over the past month. She suddenly frowned as she remembered the events leading up to the firing of the crucible.

"Garrus, EDI and the geth, are they okay?" He frowned at that, nodding.

"Yes, ani. They're fine. Why?" She relayed the memories of her conversation with the Catalyst and what she had decided. "That was a hell of a gamble, ani." He said and she shrugged.

"I figured he was lying. All synthetic life isn't the same. EDI, the Geth and the Reapers are all completely different and run in completely different ways. Synthetic life is just as varied as organic life and you can't just hit a giant off switch. Not without some kind of crazy space magic. So, I figured that he was bluffing and that he gave me the option to destroy the Reapers because not doing so would be suspect but he did so in such a way that I would normally never agree to it." Garrus smiled at her.

"Just one more person who underestimated you, huh?" She grinned at that, nodding.

"Yep. Shows how smart he was. So, I seem to remember there being talk of a wedding..." She said and he grinned.

"Do you now?" He asked and she nodded.

"Yep. My holo-locket/wedding ring even survived the blast along with me. So, when do you want to do this?" She asked and he held her close.

"ASAP, Mrs Vakarian." She grinned at that.

"Alright then, Mr Shepard. You brought back my ship in one piece?"

"Yes, ma'am. You still planning on using it to run away with me?" He asked and she bit her lip a little.

"Is that selfish? I feel like that's a little selfish. I'm sure they could use every ship they could get right now..." He shook his head at that.

"No, it's not selfish. Plus, who are _they_?" She frowned for a moment, trying to figure out who she meant.

"I guess all of the council are dead now, huh?" He nodded.

"They're still organising a new council and most of the relays have been fixed up so in the next month that particular problem should be solved. But I can't imagine you would want to give the Normandy up and you're still technically a Spectre, so..."

"It remains my Spectre ship. You always have the best plans Garrus."

"I try."

"I especially like that one about a 'turian human baby'."

"I thought you might..."


	53. Chapter 53

**Chapter 53**

"I _hate_ dresses." Shepard groaned for what she felt was the thousandth time.

"You look nice." Her mom said, a little sick of reassuring her. "Are you sure this is just about the dress?" She asked, a little concerned and Jane frowned a little.

"Yes, Mom. I'm sure. Is this the part where you try to talk me out of this because I gotta tell you, it's a little late for that." Her mom rolled her eyes in response as she put her hands on her hips.

"Jane, I'm not going to try to talk you out of anything." She said and Jane raised her eyebrow.

"Uh-huh. You're just doing your 'worried mom' thing for no reason." Her mom sighed at that.

"I can't help it. I'd like to see your attitude when your daughter gets married." Jane sighed a little at that.

"Seriously, Mom. You've been like this ever since I told you we were dating. I know _something_ is bothering you so just spit it out." Her mom sighed once again, sitting next to her on the bed of her quarters on the Normandy.

"First of all, you never told me you were dating. It was 'nothing' and then 'getting married'. Which is fine, I understand that you couldn't get the message out because of Cerberus and then you wanted to tell me to my face. It was just a bit of a shock, that's all. And secondly... well..." Jane sighed, rolling her eyes.

"_Mom_... Is this because he doesn't fit 'The Rules'?" Her mother sighed at that.

"The Rules exist for a reason, Jane." She told her and Jane rolled her eyes once again. Years ago her mother and her friends aboard the Einstein had set up a list of rules about what kind of person their daughters should marry. Jane had never really paid close attention to them (why would she when she couldn't even get a boyfriend?) but as far as she could remember, Garrus fit all but one.

"It's only one of the rules and it shouldn't even count for me." Her mom raised an eyebrow at that.

"Really? Why not?" She asked and Jane sighed.

"Because I am never going to find someone who grew up in the same 'culture'. I grew up on ships, my 'culture' is an amalgamation of every culture I've been exposed to, which does include a little turian." Her mother sighed, nodding.

"I know, Jane. It's just, you know that it's hard enough between your father and I and that's just a mix of small-town, Christian American life with metropolitan, UK city life. I mean, it was especially hard when we were deciding how to raise you, like deciding what religious values to teach you." Jane nodded at that.

"Yes, you let me decide on my religion for myself when I was old enough." She said and her mom pulled a face.

"Yes, and you know how well that turned out..." She said sourly, causing Jane to sigh.

"Mom, just face it. If you don't introduce a kid to religion until they're old enough to decide for themselves, it's not going to sound plausible. You're only upset about that because I sided with dad, not you." Her mother refused to be deterred by that.

"So what if you have kids and they side with turian culture over your own?" Jane just shrugged at that.

"Mom, like I said before, I don't have a culture of my own. It's a mishmash which really, isn't so uncommon nowadays. Let's face it Mom, this isn't the same galaxy you grew up in. We're no longer so isolated within our respective cultures and Garrus and I have been doing a good job of meshing ours so far. So what if we're making it up as we go along? It's working." Her mother nodded at that.

"I know, Jane. I just worry about you." Jane smiled at that.

"I know, Mom. But I'm fine. I'm a big girl now, you don't have to constantly worry about me." Her mother sighed again, nodding as the door to the loft chimed. "Come in." She called and the door opened to reveal Tali who was wearing a few very ornate pieces over her enviro-suit.

"Jane, hurry up. I'm going to make a pretty pathetic maid of honour if I let you be late to your own wedding." Jane smiled at that.

"I know, I know, I'm coming..."

* * *

"Garrus?" Jane said as she entered the Normandy's airlock and removed her heels.

"Yes, ani?" He asked, lowering his head to nuzzle the side of her neck as he pulled her closer to him and she smiled.

"Let's _never_ do that again." She joked and he chuckled a little.

"Agreed. Although, as big parties go I think it was alright." Jane nodded at that.

"Yeah, it wasn't too bad. And it got us married so it did it's job." She said, grinning.

"We got a day at the beach out of it as well." He pointed out and she smiled.

"Yeah, Virmire was a good choice. I guess I wanted to remember all of the people I had lost as well as the ones that could be there." He nodded, understanding as they entered the CIC to find Joker already in the pilot's seat, still in his tux.

"Hey guys. I'm surprised you two didn't sneak off to your cabin immediately." He joked and they smiled at that.

"Not yet. I need to know what everyone's plans are." Shepard said. It had only been a month since she had woken up and they had planned the fastest wedding they could. Everyone had gone their separate ways for that month before reconvening for the wedding. Now Shepard needed to know how many members of her crew would stay and how many would depart to help rebuild. Joker sighed a little before replying and EDI placed her hand on his.

"Shepard, I've got no one left. Just you guys and EDI. So, I'm staying for as long as you need me." He smiled, although it was tainted by the loss of his father and sister.

"Joker, we'll always need you. Both of you." She told them and they both nodded at that.

"So, what's the plan you two? A romantic get away somewhere?" Shepard and Garrus both smiled at that.

"Joker, what are the chances of Shepard and I doing anything normal like that?" Garrus asked, causing Joker to sigh.

"We're hunting mercs for your honeymoon, aren't we?" He asked and Shepard laughed.

"Oh Joker, you know us so well." She said, smiling. "Okay, I'll leave you and EDI to it. Liara has the coordinates for the bases of merc gangs that have been hijacking supplies meant for refugee camps. We'll head for them as soon as we've dropped everyone off." She said.

"Yes, Ma'am." Joker replied and she smiled as Garrus followed her to the galaxy map where they found Specialist Traynor, as if she had never left.

"Traynor. So, what are your plans now?" Shepard asked and Traynor shrugged.

"I don't know. Wherever my next assignment is, I guess. Although, I just wanted to say that if you still needed a communications expert, I'd like to stay aboard the Normandy." Shepard smiled at that.

"You know that I'll be following my own rules and whimsy, right? No Alliance authority here." She pointed out and Traynor just nodded.

"I know but I figure whatever you're up to, it's got to be the most exciting thing in the galaxy at that moment. And I wouldn't miss it." Shepard smiled at that.

"Then you're welcome to stay aboard." She told her before she and Garrus headed to the elevator and went down to the crew deck where they were quickly attacked by an excited young girl.

"Good thing you never have to wear that dress again." Garrus joked as Kara hugged Shepard.

"I missed you, Aunt Jane." She said, upset that she had been away from her for two months.

"I know, Kara. I missed you too." She said as they approached her gran who was sitting at the counter in the mess with Sol. "So, what's everone got planned?" She asked, directing her attention to the two adults.

"Well, Kara and I are headed back to Earth. We've been helping to organise refugees while they rebuild." Her gran said and Shepard nodded.

"I'd much rather stay on the space ship..." Kara sulked a little but Jane laughed a little.

"Don't worry, Kara. You can come back and visit all the time. I promise." Jane told her and she perked up.

"Do you know what Mom and Dad are doing?" She asked her gran and she nodded.

"They're heading back to earth with Kara and I. The Alliance have them both aiding with the rebuilding efforts." Jane nodded at that before turning her attention towards Sol, although it was Garrus who spoke.

"What about you and Dad?" He asked and Sol sighed a little.

"The same. We're heading to Palaven to try and help rebuild. Most damage is superficial like on Earth but we have to check the house and stuff. Although, they say that they should be finished rebuilding the Citadel next year and I put a lot of thought into what you said." At that she turned her attention towards Shepard.

"And?" She asked.

"And I think I'm going to give it a go. C-Sec, I mean._ Someone_ has to keep family traditions alive." She joked at her brother who rolled his eyes.

"You want to put up with all of that red tape, then be my guest. I'm much happier in my current position." He said and she laughed.

"I bet you are." She joked back as the duo headed towards Liara's office.

"Hello. I wasn't expecting you two to drop by this evening." She said as they entered and Shepard shrugged.

"I'm just checking with everyone what their plans are." Liara shrugged at that.

"Honestly, I have no idea. After I destroyed the Shadow Broker base I headed straight for Mars. I still have my apartment on Illium, assuming it's still standing, but it's hardly a secure location." Shepard shrugged at that.

"Well, why don't you just stay put? All of your equipment is set up and we're going to be randomly hopping from system to system to avoid detection so we're as secure as it gets. Plus, we're using you as our source on which targets to hit to help the galaxy as a whole the most so you being here would hardly be a bother." She nodded at that.

"I suppose you are right. And, this really has become my home since I have returned." She reasoned, smiling. "If you're sure it's okay with you then I shall alert Feron to the change in plans."

"I'm sure, Liara. Now, if you'll excuse us we have to check on the rest of the crew." Shepard told her and the asari nodded.

"Of course." She replied and they left the room, heading towards the med-bay.

"So, doc. Have any amazing offers that you're going to leave us for?" Shepard joked as they entered the med-bay and Doctor Chakwas shook her head.

"No, Commander. Given the frequency with which you and Garrus get yourselves injured, I figured you would need a full time medic on staff." Shepard laughed at that.

"I guess you're right. Plus, if I remember correctly you still owe me a drink." The doctor smiled at that, nodding.

"That I do. Now, go on you two. I've wasted enough of your time." They grinned at that, heading back out the door and Garrus sighed a little with frustration.

"We're going to check on my least favourite Spectre, aren't we?" He groaned and she nodded.

"_Garrus_, behave." She warned before sighing herself. "It's not as if he's going to stay with us, I just want to say goodbye and find out where he's heading." Garrus nodding in agreement, sighing a little and she smiled._ Typical Garrus_, she thought to herself. But that's what she wanted. Typical Garrus, by her side for the rest of their days.

"Hey, Kaidan." Shepard said as she entered the observation deck. His expression seemed a little pained but he smiled and nodded to them as they entered the room.

"Hey. What are you guys doing here?" He asked and Shepard shrugged.

"Just checking in with everyone. Finding out what everyone has planned." She explained and he nodded.

"Well, I'm going back to the Alliance. They need every helping hand they can get." She nodded, she hadn't really expected any other answer. "You should come back too. They need you and the Normandy to help rebuild." She laughed under her breath at that, realising that she should have seen it coming.

"Kaidan, I've done everything I can for them. Let's face it, I'm doing the right thing here. There are plenty of people who are using the remaining chaos to cover up their criminal activities. They're getting away with it because no one has the resources to spare to stop them. But we can." Kaidan nodded at that.

"I wish you would reconsider but I know that you won't." He said and she just nodded.

"This is my home Kaidan. I'll help the Alliance when they ask me to but I'm remaining independent. It's the best way to get the job done." He nodded again and they left him alone with his thoughts. She frowned a little as they headed down to engineering, feeling how tired Garrus was.

"You know, you don't have to come with. I'll only be about half an hour and then I'll be right back up to our quarters." She told him but he shook his head.

"I like this. Watching you do your rounds and interact with the crew. It's nice." He admitted and she smiled.

"Really? Because I'd imagine it's as boring as hell." She joked and he shrugged.

"I don't mind. Is it a bad thing that I want a little bit of boring before we go chasing down merc gangs?" He asked and she shook her head.

"No, as long as it's only a little bit." She teased before they entered the cargo hold where Javik was staying.

"Hey, Javik. Got a minute?" She asked as she entered the room. The prothean nodded. "I just... I know that you said that you wanted to find your crew and... join them but I would urge you to reconsider. I don't think the galaxy is quite ready for you to say goodbye just yet." She said and he folded his arms.

"The protheans are gone and I have done my duty. The Reapers are finished and there is nothing left for me here. I do not belong in this time." He reasoned but Jane shrugged.

"You belong here, Javik. No one staying on this ship has anywhere left to go. Your situation isn't as unique as you think. And I... I've lost enough friends to this war, Javik. I don't want to lose another." She admitted and the prothean nodded.

"It will take time for me to find their resting place. I shall... stay for the meantime. Perhaps I will find a reason to stay longer." Jane nodded at that.

"I hope you do." She said before leaving with Garrus in tow, headed towards main engineering. He expected her to head to the drive core and talk with the engineer but she instead headed down to where Jack used to stay.

"I figured I might find you down here." Shepard said to the woman across the room. Garrus still couldn't get used to seeing Jack in a dress but Shepard had told her that if she had to wear one, Jack had to, too.

"Fuck, Shepard. Don't sneak up on me." Shepard grinned at that.

"So, are you heading back to Earth to teach your students?" She asked and the biotic nodded.

"Yeah. Although after fighting on Earth I don't think they need me so much any more. I figured that if I was going to keep teaching them after this, it would have to be in the field not the classroom. Not the entire class at once, obviously, but I thought small groups at a time getting some real world experience before they joined the Alliance proper wasn't a bad idea." Shepard nodded.

"Sounds like a plan. If you want, we're going to be a little understaffed and could use the extra hand so you and your students could tag along with us. We're going to be hunting merc gangs and, who knows, we might even run into the remainder of Cerberus." Jack grinned at that.

"You're on. I'll have to clear it with Sanders but if she's cool with it then fuck yeah." Shepard grinned back, nodding.

"Alright, we'd better get going." She said, moving away and Jack nodded.

"See ya, Shepard." Garrus just chuckled.

"What?" She asked him, grinning herself.

"You just can't be on a ship with the domestic element, can you?" She raised her eyebrows at that.

"Garrus, this is a ship run by a married couple. I don't think it gets more domestic than that." She joked as they entered main engineering and found Tali, Engineer Adams, Ken and Gabby all chatting away.

"Hey guys." She said as she approached and they all nodded to her.

"Hey, Shepard." Tali replied and Shepard gave her a sad smile.

"Ready to head by to Rannoch?" She asked and Tali nodded.

"Thanks for agreeing to give me a ride." She said and Shepard nodded.

"It's the least I could do." She said, shrugging as Tali hugged her.

"You have to promise to visit all of the time, Jane." She told her friend sternly and Shepard smiled, widely.

"I promise, Tali." he told her friend before turning to the other engineers. "So, what about you three? What do you guys have planned?" She asked and Adams was the first to reply.

"I'm heading back to Earth, I have a new assignment from Hackett." He answered and Shepard nodded before turning to Ken and Gabby.

"So, what about you two?" She asked and Gabby answered, smiling.

"If it's alright with you, we're staying put. Someone has to keep the ship running." She joked and Shepard smiled.

"I wouldn't have it any other way. Now, if you'll all excuse us we only have James and Cortez left to speak to." They all smiled and nodded at that as they headed downstairs to the shuttle bay where they found James packing.

"I guess you're off to N7 training, huh?" She asked as she approached and he nodded.

"Yep. But once I'm done, Hackett says I'm allowed to head back here and serve with you. I think he wants more Alliance personnel on board so you don't forget to do favours for them." Shepard smiled at that, nodding.

"Well, it's not as if I could run this ship with just Garrus, EDI and Joker so it's a mutually beneficial trade. Just so long as none of the crew leak any of our flight plans. I want to stay as off-the-radar as possible." James nodded in agreement.

"You deserve the chance to do that, Lola." He said before turning to Garrus. "Take care of her, Scars." He told the turian who nodded in return.

"Of course." He said as they moved back across the shuttle bay to Cortez.

"So, you leaving us too, Steve?" She asked him and he shook his head.

"Are you kidding me, Shepard? With your driving I'm staying put to make sure you don't kill everyone. You're worse than Vega..." He joked and she pulled a face.

"I'm Commander Shepard, I get paid to take down bad guys, not drive shuttles. Or makos, for that matter..." Garrus chuckled at that as Cortez nodded.

"Yes, ma'am. Now, I know you two have better things to do than hang around here. It is your wedding night, after all." He said and Shepard grinned at him.

"I knew there was a reason I liked you, Steve." She said, still grinning, as she pulled Garrus into the elevator. He gave her a questioning look.

"Is this a human tradition that I don't know about?" He asked and she laughed.

"That's what we get for planning a wedding in a month. Come on, I'll show you once we get upstairs." She grinned, wrapping her arms around him.

"I have to say that I'm impressed by how quickly you put this together." He said and she shrugged, still grinning and wishing that the elevator was faster.

"I had a month. You can do a lot with a month. They say Rome wasn't built in a day but I reckon that they would at least have had a good start within a month." She joked as they finally arrived in their quarters. "I guess I'd better explain that tradition now." She said playfully as they entered the cabin.

"Indeed, Mrs Vakarian." He said and she raised an eyebrow at that.

"While I like that, Garrus, you do know that I'm going to have to keep my own name?" He laughed at that, nodding.

"Of course, ani. Although, I do have a surprise of my own." He told her, grinning as she raised an eyebrow.

"Really?" She asked and he nodded.

"Yes. Now close your eyes." She frowned a little but did so as he sat her down on the edge of the bed.

"Garrus?" She asked just before she felt a cold brush across her cheek. She jumped a little in surprise.

"You have to keep still..." He told her, his sub-harmonics telling her that he was concentrating. Eventually the cold brushes stopped. "Okay, open your eyes." He told her and she opened them, frowning a little. He handed her a mirror and she laughed as it showed her face painted with his blue colony marks.

"Garrus... they're perfect!" She told him, still grinning as he grinned back. "Although, I guess the paint isn't permanent?" He shook his head at that.

"No, it doesn't remain on human skin like on turian plates. It'll wash off in about a week. But I figured people would stare if you wore them all the time and I know that you don't like that and it doesn't really help us to disappear. But you can apply it whenever you want to." He told her and she smiled at him.

"I love you, Garrus." She told him, her voice low as she touched her forehead to his.

"I love you too, Jane." Her smile widened at that.

"Now I think it's time to show you that human tradition..."


	54. Chapter 54

**Chapter 54**

"Nice work, Archangel." Shepard said, grinning at her bondmate as he jumped down from his sniping perch, quickly scanning the area for remaining enemies.

"Back at you, Phoenix." He told her and she shook her head.

"Yeah, as much as I don't want to believe it, my crime fighting nickname has always been, and probably will always be, 'Commander Shepard'." She said, sighing and he laughed a little.

"The sad truth is you never get to pick your own nickname. You chose mine, remember?" She smiled at the memory of their last conversation before she had been spaced, as she inspected the cargo that the mercs were moving through the base. She took a sharp breath as she saw an all too familiar logo.

"Garrus..." She called him over to confirm what she was seeing, when a shot fired out and hit her in the shoulder. Her biotic barriers were down and she was wearing minimal armour. She gasped with pain as Garrus spun around and shot down the sniper that had hit her, revealing it to be a Cerberus nemesis.

"_Damn it_." He growled as knelt beside her. "I keep telling you that you need to wear more armour, ani. Or at least something with a medi-gel dispenser..." She shook her head at that.

"Too bulky." She said before nodding to the logo on the side of the crates. "I figured there would be remnants but I thought they would at least lay low for a while. I thought they would need time to regroup..." She muttered through gritted teeth and Garrus shook his head at that.

"Bastards are sneakier than I thought. Come on, let's get you back to the ship." He said, trying to help her up, but she brushed him off.

"I got shot in the shoulder, Garrus. Not the leg. I can still walk." She managed and he rolled his eyes at her stubbornness as they made their way back to the shuttle where Liara, Javik and Cortez were waiting for them.

"Cortez, can you run Shepard and I back to the Normandy?" He asked and Shepard shook her head.

"No, we still need to collect the cargo and data." She said but he sighed in response. Liara spoke up.

"Javik and I can handle that while Cortez runs you two back. He can come back for us once you're on board the Normandy. Shepard sighed, still gritting her teeth, before nodding.

"Okay." She said finally and Garrus frowned. The wound looked worse than it should have been. Her cybernetics should have started to close it by now. He watched her carefully as the shuttle took off, noticing her skin turn a little pale.

"Are you okay?" He asked, concerned and she nodded.

"I've been a little under the weather and I think it's effecting my cybernetics." She admitted and he frowned.

"How long have you been sick?" He asked worriedly and she sighed a little.

"Not that long. See, this is why I didn't tell you. You're getting all worried. I'll be fine." She reassured him, although she was still pale and he could feel that she was in pain.

"Uh-huh. Well, we'll see if Doctor Chakwas agrees with your assessment, won't we?" He said and she groaned. She _hated_ having to be treated by doctors...

* * *

"So, doc, how am I?" She asked and the doctor frowned at her omni-tool.

"I'm not-" She started but was interrupted by Shepard's face paling again before she ran to the waste bin and promptly spewed up her lunch.

"Jane..." Garrus said as he approached and she shrugged as she wiped her mouth.

"I'm fine, Garrus. I told you, I've been a little under the weather..." He frowned at that.

"'Under the weather' is a headache or the sniffles. Regurgitating your lunch is full blown 'sick'." He told her and she sighed.

"It's not that bad." She reasoned but he raised a brow plate.

"How long have you been throwing up?" He asked her and she looked a little sheepish.

"Just a week or so. It's no big deal, _really_..." He groaned but she just shook her head. "Look, doc, tell him I'm fi-" She was cut off by EDI.

"Commander, you said you wanted Miranda contacted about the Cerberus activity. She is trying to call through the QEC." Shepard nodded at that.

"Is the channel secure?" She asked.

"Specialist Traynor and I have seen to it." The AI replied and Shepard gave the doctor an apologetic look.

"I'm sorry, doc. I've got to take this. EDI, patch it through." She said, causing Chakwas to narrow her eyes at her.

"Shepard." Miranda's form appeared over EDI's old holographic projector.

"Miranda, we found what appeared to be a merc base at these coordinates." She brought up her omni-tool to send the coordinates to her. "They've been hijacking shipments meant for refugees but when we arrived we found Cerberus equipment and had a run-in with one of their operatives." Miranda frowned at the coordinates she had been given.

"I had hoped that by stopping the Illusive Man we had bought ourselves more time but apparently not. Cerberus is a huge organisation, Shepard. It's divided into cells and those cells have no contact with each other. They operate completely independently and from what I can tell the death of the Illusive Man and the end of the war hasn't done much to slow down their operations." Shepard sighed, shaking her head.

"We need to stop them. Any ideas about how we'd go about that?" Miranda was silent with thought for a few moments before replying.

"Omega. From what I can tell the station has become the focal point for Cerberus activity in this sector. If we took back control from them it would put a dent in Cerberus operations. At least for the time being." Shepard nodded at that.

"Where are you? We'll come and pick you up." Shepard told her and she nodded.

"I'm on Illium with Oriana. If I come with you, she comes too." She said and Shepard nodded at that.

"Of course. I would be glad to have the both of you aboard." She said, smiling. Doctor Chakwas nodded in agreement.

"Yes, it would be good to have someone with more familiar knowledge of your cybernetics on board." Chakwas said and Miranda frowned.

"Is there something wrong with Shepard's cybernetics?" She asked and Shepard frowned, mirroring Miranda's expression.

"Yeah, I guess you never got round to telling me what was wrong." She said and the doctor sighed.

"Can I assume you don't mind me telling you in front of Garrus and Miranda?" She asked and Shepard shook her head. She wouldn't hide anything from Garrus and if it was a problem with her cybernetics Miranda would have to help, anyway.

"No, it's fine." She said and the doctor sighed.

"We partially figured out what Mordin's last enhancements were designed to do while you were unconscious after the blast from the crucible. You cybernetics have been partially rewriting your DNA so that it's part levo and part dextro, using prothean DNA as a buffer between the two. What we couldn't figure out was _why_." Shepard frowned at that.

"So why has that affected my regeneration abilities and made me sick? Did the modifications not work?" Chakwas shook her head at that.

"No, I think they are working exactly as intended. Your regenerative abilities have been temporarily shut down to conserve energy which has been directed to other, new functions. Mostly hormone production." Shepard raised her eyebrows.

"Why do I feel as if you're gearing me up for some big revelation? Come on, doc. What does Mordin's modification actually do?" The doctor brought up her omni-tool data to show Shepard.

"Well, Shepard. My scans indicate that you're pregnant." The doctor told her and Garrus's jaw almost hit the floor and Shepard frowned.

"Doc, that's not poss- Wait, you said conserving energy for hormone production?" She asked, her frown lifting to be replaced by raised eyebrows.

"Yes." The doctor replied and Garrus could feel his bondmate trying to repress her emotions as she tried to reconcile the idea that the doctor could be speaking the truth in her mind.

"And you said that Mordin successfully used prothean DNA as a buffer between dextro and levo amino acids?" She asked, a smile creeping up on her lips.

"Yes, it seems to have worked perfectly." Chakwas told her and Shepard broke out into a grin.

"Oh, that clever son of a bitch. I would never have thought- I mean, I did _think_ but- I assumed the preliminary tests wouldn't lead to anything. He must have kept working on that research when he went back to the STG." She spoke at a million miles a minute before turning to Garrus. "You know what this means? I'm actually pregnant, ani. And it's _our_ baby." He stared at her blankly and blinked a few times. She bit her lip. "Are you okay?" She asked and the worry in her sub-harmonics snapped him out of his shock.

"Of course I am, ani." He said, wrapping his arms around her and catching her off guard, sending her into a fit of laughter.

"Have I ever told you, you're cute when you're shocked?" She told him, grinning. At that point Doctor Chakwas interrupted them.

"I must warn you that this child is the first of it's kind. There are all kinds of complications that we can't even begin to predict. I... I can't guarantee that this will work out, Shepard." Jane took a deep breath and nodded at that.

"I know, doc. I know..."


	55. Chapter 55

**Chapter 55**

Shepard sat back in her desk chair, taking a breather from reviewing the files in front of her to instead watch the crew in the mess hall. She smiled as she saw Liara and Feron together. They had picked Feron up when they had retrieved Miranda as he had finished his current assignment for Liara and she had suggested that she would like him to stick around and help her organise data. Of course, the drell had leapt at the chance. Although, Shepard figured it was probably a good thing that Liara couldn't hear drell sub-harmonics because every time Javik walked in the room Feron's went into full on jealousy mode.

"I figured I might find you here." She spun her chair around, bringing her knees up to her chest as she heard Garrus's voice form across the room. She smiled at him, pushing her classes up her nose.

"Hey." She said as he walked over, eventually leaning against the wall next to her desk.

"You've been in here all day." He pointed out and she shrugged.

"Chakwas and Miranda keep asking for more tests. Plus, I figured I should try to hack Mordin's files again but it turns out that they were programmed to unlock as soon as certain scans were entered into the medical systems.

"I still can't believe he didn't tell you what he was doing." Garrus muttered and Jane shrugged.

"I... After we met Kara I did a little research. Just to see if it was really as impossible as we thought. I had a few preliminary ideas, including using some kind of buffer between the two DNAs, when Mordin caught me. I shrugged it off and told him that it was just wishful thinking. I said that I didn't want to get my hopes up and so I stopped my work. I figured it was a problem for another day. I guess Mordin knew me well enough to not accept that bullshit... The files themselves are pretty informative but not as much as I would like. There's still so much we don't know..." She trailed off, running her hand through the loose strands of hair that had fallen over her face, pushing them back out of her way.

"You're worried." Garrus said. It wasn't a question, he could feel her worry through their bond, mirroring his own.

"Of course I am, Garrus. As much as I want to believe that this will all work out wonderfully, I have to be realistic. My body wasn't designed to be able to handle this and it might not be able to cope. Add to that the fact that no one knows what a human turian baby would be like... There are just a million ways this could go wrong." She sighed and he nodded.

"I know, ani. But there are also quite a few ways it could go right. Mordin knew what he was doing, and I don't think he would ever do something if it might cause you any pain or distress." He reasoned and she nodded.

"I hope you're right Garrus, spirits, I really do..." She mumbled into her knees as she sighed. "When did you become so optimistic?" She asked with humour in her sub-harmonics as she frowning a little.

"I think we've both had enough worry and pain for one lifetime. Come on, ani. There's nothing more you can do. Try focusing on something else for a bit." She sighed again and nodded at that.

"You're right. I have to go and talk to Miranda anyway. I think I have an idea about the Omega problem." She said, getting up.

"Do you want me to tag along?" He asked and she nodded.

"Yeah. You're a part of this plan anyway." She said before they made their way to the observation deck where Miranda and Oriana were staying. They were both in the room when they entered, pouring over data pads.

"Hey Shepard. What can we help you with?" Miranda asked as they entered and Shepard sat down opposite her friend.

"I had an idea about hitting Omega." Miranda nodded at that as Shepard handed her another data pad. "You mentioned that we would have to flush them out and that would take superior numbers, right?"

"Right. There really isn't another way to get rid of every operative from the station. We would have to retake control of all of they key systems at once and that would take several small task groups. Add to that the fact that they would all have to know Omega in order to be effective enough." Shepard nodded at that.

"I think I know where we can get help..." She said and Garrus growled.

"_Jane_..." He warned but she shot him a silencing look.

"You may not like her Garrus but you have to admit, Omega is better under Aria's control than that of Cerberus." He continued to frown.

"So you're planning on just going to her and asking for her help?" He asked and Shepard shook her head.

"I'm not asking for her help, I'm giving her ours. Let's face it Garrus, she is going to retake Omega. Frankly I would just wait it out and let her deal with it but the data on Cerberus activities we could get is too valuable. So, I offer our help in exchange for any and all data we find." Garrus didn't look happy and his sub-harmonics were all over the place but she gave him a look that kept him quiet while she went over the plan with Miranda.

"Aria has a whole army of mercs at her command. What could we possibly add to that?" Miranda pointed out and Shepard smiled.

"Me and Garrus. I figure nobody knows Omega like Archangel and this is pretty much a textbook N7 exercise. She doesn't need an army, she needs a few well-trained operatives that can take back control of the station's key systems before Cerberus even knows what hit 'em." She told her and she nodded. Shepard took a deep breath and suppressed a frown as she felt Garrus seething next to her. "Can you two work out the details of our plan to present to her? I'm going to tell Joker to set a course for her base. Liara should know the coordinates." Miranda nodded as Shepard and Garrus left the room. Shepard walked over to life support, which was empty, and turned to face a livid Garrus.

"Okay, let me have it." She said, her arms folded, ready for whatever he had to say. The daring look in her eye was damn near one of the sexiest things he'd ever seen and wasn't helping his irritation any.

"Are you _trying_ to get yourself killed?" He shouted, angrily and she just raised an eyebrow.

"I am once again loving your confidence in me." She said sarcastically, fuelling his anger.

"Fucking Aria, Jane?! She'll stab you in the back the first opportunity she gets!" Shepard scoffed at that, shaking her head.

"And what are you basing that assumption on? I'm giving her something she wants for a very reasonable price. She has no reason to cross me and Aria doesn't strike me as the type to do things for no real reason." She told him. Her tone was cold, logical and analytical and he hated it. He hated the fact that she could be so fucking calm about it.

"Right, you're giving her your services. You're just going to walk into a Cerberus controlled space station and hope they don't recognise you and focus all of their attentions on killing you?!" She shrugged at that outburst.

"That's why you're going to be there. At my six. Just like old times. I mean, come on, we've been in worse situations. This is actually a pretty simple mission by our standards. It's exactly the same as any other time we've gone on a mission. I don't see the diff- Oh, _Garrus..._" She moaned as she realised what was bothering him. She sighed, her voice softening as she shook her head. "Look, let's get one thing straight, okay? I am not sitting on my ass for nine months, or possibly longer. I will wear heavy armour with medi-gel dispensers but I am going to keep working and part of my job is going on missions and leading ground teams." Her tone was sympathetic and her eyes told him that she understood his concerns. But that didn't change her mind. His sub-harmonics growled with frustration but he sighed, scratching his fringe.

"You are the most infuriating woman I have ever had the misfortune to meet!" He growled and she smiled, taking it as a compliment, before frowning again.

"Garrus, this isn't like you. Well, the protectiveness is but you can normally put the mission ahead of that. And I've certainly never seen you this worked up before." He groaned in frustration at that.

"It was easier before. It was a psychological reaction, not a physiological one." He tried to explain but her frown just deepened.

"How so?" She asked and he sighed, trying to stop the frustration trilling through his sub-harmonics.

"You know how turians depend more on pheromones than humans?" He asked and she nodded.

"Yeah, that's how you identify bondmates." She said and he nodded.

"They're used in a bunch of different way, although most are to do with mating. Humans don't have them so any response you triggered from me before was purely emotional. But since the crucible fired..." He trailed off and she nodded, understanding.

"When the crucible fired, I was heavily injured and when my cybernetics healed me, they rewrote some of the DNA in the new cells. So, what? I'm producing turian pheromones now?" She asked and he shrugged.

"Not exactly but close enough. Especially now." She sighed, nodding.

"So, what you're saying is this is a turian thing about being protective of your bondmate and child?" He nodded and she sighed, smiling and shaking her head.

"Garrus, that's sweet but-"

"Knock it off?" He finished for her and she laughed a little.

"Yeah. I promise I'll be careful but I can't have you stressing out every time there's even a little bit of danger. You'll never get any rest." He laughed a little and sighed.

"I don't know how easy it'll be to stop but I'll try." He said and she nodded.

"I can't ask you for more than that."


	56. Chapter 56

**Chapter 56**

"Damn it!" Shepard yelled as she ducked into cover, bullets just grazing her biotic barriers. She moved to fire a shockwave over her cover but her biotics spluttered and died. She cursed, not wanting to move too much out of her cover as her barriers also failed to remain up. After a couple of seconds she heard a shot ring out and Miranda walked over to her as she tried to focus on regaining control of her fluctuating powers.

"Are you okay, Shepard?" The brunette asked as Shepard finally just let her biotics die out.

"Yeah. I just... I lost control of my biotics. I couldn't generate a stable field." She admitted, shaking her head a little. Miranda sighed.

"We split up for two seconds and you almost get yourself killed, Shepard. You do know Garrus will tear me to shreds if anything happens to you?" She said irritably as Shepard moved towards the main life support systems and keyed in the override code Aria had given her.

"I'm fine, Miranda. Really." Shepard said, smiling as she activated her comm.

"Archangel, do you copy?" She asked.

"Loud and clear, Shepard. Are you okay?" He asked and she sighed.

"I'm fine." She told him but she could feel his disbelief over their bond, even at their current distance.

"Really?" He asked and she sighed.

"I had a close call but I'm fine. No harm done. Have you reached the main power systems?" She returned to the task at hand as fast as she could.

"Yeah. I've keyed in the override code. Aria should have full access once she reaches the main computer." Shepard nodded, before adding Aria to the conversation.

"Aria, you at the main computer yet?" She asked and was greeted by silence for a few seconds before the asari replied.

"Yes. The Cerberus bastards holed up in Afterlife gave me a little trouble but nothing I couldn't handle." Shepard nodded at that, despite the fact that Aria couldn't see.

"So, are you locking down the Cerberus operatives?" She asked as she and Miranda got ready to move out.

"Yes. Although I may have to open the airlocks on a couple of the levels and space them. To teach them a lesson." Shepard rolled her eyes at that.

"Yeah, yeah. 'Don't fuck with Aria'. We know. Just not too many? We still need that data." She warned.

"Of course." Shepard smiled at Aria's reply as she shook her head.

"So, is it safe to move about the station?" She asked.

"I've unlocked a Cerberus free route for you to take back to Afterlife. Come and meet me here."

"On our way."

* * *

As Shepard made her way into Afterlife she saw Garrus approach her and she could feel through their bond that he had a few choice words for her. None of them pleasant.

_You can say whatever you have to back on the ship._ She told him through their bond before they approached Aria who was back in her usual spot. It was strange to see the nightclub so empty and devoid of life. If one thing could be said for Omega, it was that there was always a dark energy about it that accented everything. Shepard may not find that atmosphere pleasant, but she could understand the appeal.

"I suppose I should thank you for helping me with this, Shepard." Aria said as Shepard sat across from her.

"As long as you give us the intel we need, we're even." She said and Aria nodded.

"Of course. You can remain docked for as long as you like and you're more than welcome to any and all Cerberus intel we find. Omega is back in business." Shepard smiled at that and nodded before turning to Miranda.

"You're the Cerberus expert. Can you deal with rounding up the information with Feron? Liara and I will stay on the Normandy and start analysing it until you're done and can join us." Shepard said as she got up.

"Of course, Shepard." She said as Shepard got up and headed out into the empty streets of Omega with Garrus.

"If you're building up to an 'I told you so' then I suggest you just get it out of the way." She said, sighing and looking a little defeated. His heart melted at that and instead of yelling he smiled.

"Where's the fun in that?" He asked and she narrowed her eyes at him, a smile creeping across her face as she hit him playfully.

"Baka. Okay, so you were sort of right. Without my enhanced healing or biotics I'm not much use in the field." She sighed, her eyes avoiding his. He knew that she hated the feeling of being useless, of not being in control. Especially of her biotics. Her biotics weren't refined but she had put a lot of time into practising with them in order to increase the force of her attacks. It was the one thing she could say that she had worked hard at to get, everything else was either second nature to her or she had nothing to do with it, and it was the one thing she had pride in. To have lost control of them was damaging her self-esteem and he could see it.

"We don't need you to be in the field, ani. We have the information so now it's a case of piecing it together and figuring out what Cerberus is up to. That's going to take time." She nodded, sighing.

"I know. You're right, there isn't a reason for me to be in the field right now. It's just... It's been all I've known for so long. Even before we encountered Saren, I don't think I've had time away from field missions since basic. Before that it had been school work that had kept my attention. Passing my exams and getting my qualifications. That trip to the Citadel when I met you was partially a celebration of me finishing school. I could have finished it earlier if I had wanted but as my mum pointed out, it wasn't as if I could go to university or anything until I was eighteen anyway. Not that it mattered in the end, once I discovered my biotics." She admitted and he nodded.

"Come on, ani. Let's go home."

* * *

Once Shepard was changed and sorted she met Liara in her office. The asari was sitting on her bed, surrounded by data pads. Shepard sat next to her, picking up one of the pads.

"What do we have so far?" She asked and Liara looked a little worried. She passed a couple of data pads to Shepard.

"Here, see for yourself." Shepard frowned, scanning the pads. It was enough for her to get the gist of the experiments of that particular cell.

"Liara, have you verified this against your own data?" She asked and the asari nodded.

"They're called the Hybrid cell. They started up not long after Project Lazarus. It appears to be a precursor to the experiments that lead to Reaper tech being implanted in the Cerberus operatives. The basic idea was to enhance strength, biotic abilities, etc. through genetic engineering. Much like Miranda. But instead of simply using the best of the human genome they wanted to splice DNA from different species. None of their attempts were successful as were none before it." Shepard averted her gaze, her hand moving to her abdomen as she realised what Liara was saying.

"Until now..." Shepard muttered and Liara nodded.

"Your own changes were only made possible thanks to your extensive cybernetics which were, in turn, only possible because you were dead. No one could survive being implanted so heavily. But your child doesn't have implants. The mix of DNA is entirely natural. I hate to be the one to say this but Cerberus won't be the only ones... interested. Add to that the fact that you and Garrus have become the focal point of any remaining anti-human/turian sentiments and..." Shepard nodded, understanding.

"Liara, can you step up security on the ship? Make sure no harmful information leaves?" Liara nodded at that.

"Of course." Shepard nodded again. It had been on her mind a lot lately; what she should do. Should she turn to the council or the Alliance for help, knowing that she needed high level medical expertise? No, she had decided. She would barely trust them with her own life, never mind that of her child. The only place that screamed safety to her was the Normandy. So that's where she would stay.

"Good. Liara, we have to keep this quiet. The best thing we could do is not let any information about this leave the ship. You, Garrus, Miranda, EDI and Chakwas are the only ones that know for now and I'm going to keep it that way for as long as possible. In the meantime I need you to clamp down on anything and everything that might be considered a security risk. No information about this leaves the ship, okay?" Liara nodded but looked concerned.

"Shepard, what about after the baby is born. We can't be sure of what it's appearance will be. Are you going to keep the child locked up on the ship it's entire life?" Shepard shook her head at that.

"No. I mean, I was raised on ships and can tell you that it's not a bad way to grow up so for the most part we'll stay aboard the Normandy but... I have a few ideas. Favours I can call in. None of it is vital right now. I mean, this could all go wrong and be a null point tomorrow." Liara put her hand on her friend's shoulder as worry and fear of losing her child flashed across the commander's face. She took a deep breath before continuing. "So, for now the information leaks take precedence. Mordin's discovery is still valuable data to anyone interested and I don't want it falling into the hands of Cerberus and the like." Liara nodded at that.

"Of course, Shepard."


	57. Chapter 57

**Chapter 57**

Shepard sat anxiously in the shuttle bay, perched on one of the crates. She tried to focus on the rifle in her hands, aiming it on the target across the room, but she was interrupted by the sound of the approaching shuttle. Garrus stepped out with Jack and two of her students as soon as the shuttle docked. Jack had rejoined them about a month ago and she and her students were filling up the holes in Shepard's squad and had ended up taking most of the data retrieval missions. Jack was glad at the chance to take further revenge against Cerberus and they made good training exercises for her students. Shepard smiled at Garrus as he approached, lowering the rifle as she bounced over to him.

"Did you get the data?" She asked and he grinned.

"Yes. I ending up staying back and observing for most of the mission. Jack and her students handled themselves quite well." He said and her heart swelled with pride. He had never been comfortable leading teams after Omega and had continued to struggle with it, even after the Collector base. It helped to ease her restlessness to know that he was regaining his confidence in his leadership abilities. That being said, she was still bored out of her mind most of the time. Hence the sniper practice.

"Shit, Shepard, how long are your biotics going to fritz? It's been months." Jack asked and Shepard smiled a little, shrugging. She knew that she would have to let the crew know what was really going on sooner or later, the hoodies she had taken to wearing would only hide the bump for so long, but for now she was sticking to the story that the crucible firing had sent her biotics haywire.

"I don't know. Liara has been trying to help me with regaining control but it seems my body just doesn't have the energy to maintain a stable mass effect field." Jack nodded, narrowing her eyes.

"Still, you do know tech. You could compensate." Shepard laughed a little at that.

"I could but do you know how long it takes to retrain your fighting style? By the time I was done my biotics would be better anyway." Jack nodded at that before leading her students out of her room. At that point Garrus wrapped his arms around Shepard and brought his forehead to hers.

"You're going to have to tell the crew soon, ani. They're worried about you." He told her softly and she nodded.

"I know. And I will. Did you have fun on the mission?" She asked and he sighed.

"It's pretty hard to enjoy it when you're not there." He told her in an effort to cheep her up but she just sighed a little.

"I was bored." She admitted and he smiled.

"You'd have to be to pick up a sniper rifle." He said and she grinned.

"Well, it's not as if I can practise anything else. Gabby and Ken practically kicked me out of engineering the other week and Liara was close to doing the same. I feel... useless. So I decided that I should practise with the sniper rifle." She said, sighing again.

"So, how's it going?" He asked and her face soured.

"I'm improving but... it's slow going." She said bitterly and he smiled.

"It's funny how sometimes you seem to have infinite patience and then others you seem to have none at all." He told her and she shrugged.

"I guess I'm just a mystery like that. Admit it, it's why you love me." She said and he grinned.

"It really is..."

* * *

"Hey, Commander. We're going to reach Earth in a few hours. You sure you don't want to give them a heads up?" Joker asked as Shepard entered the cockpit.

"No. They need to get used to us just popping up whenever we want." She reasoned and he smiled, although it faltered a bit as EDI got up to allow the commander to sit in the co-pilot's chair. "Thanks, EDI." The commander said and Joker frowned.

"Commander, are you really okay? It seems like more than just your biotics acting up. I know that EDI knows something but she refuses to tell me. I'm worried and so is the rest of the crew." He told her and Shepard nodded.

"I know. I just... I had to be sure that it was safe before I told everyone. If this information gets out..." She trailed off and Joker nodded.

"You can trust us, Commander." She took a deep breath and nodded.

"So, turns out I'm pregnant." She said and Joker's eyebrows shot up into his cap.

"But that's..."

"Impossible? Yeah, I know. Turns out I'm good at impossible." She joked and Joker shook his head.

"So, you haven't told anyone because...?" She sighed.

"Because a half-turian, half-human baby is going to cause problems. Thankfully we were planning to disappear anyway but this gives us a really solid reason to. I just... I needed to be sure that I could trust the crew to keep this quiet." Joker nodded at that.

"You can count on us. So, why are we headed to Earth?" He asked and Shepard sighed.

"Because I really need my mom right about now..."

* * *

Shepard smiled as she left the shuttle to be greeted by her mom. She quickly glanced around the area and saw that most of the damage had been repaired. She didn't know exactly how hard the little Spanish seaside town had been hit but she suspected that it had been as bad as London and, if so, they had done well to have it so well repaired. Through the clouds she could see the outline of the Citadel, still being rebuilt. It hadn't been moved yet since keeping it near Earth meant it was easier to transport resources for repairs. Shepard still didn't really care for it, it still gave her the creeps. She grinned as her mom linked arms with her, opting out of hugging as she knew how uncomfortable it made Jane.

"Hey Mom." She said, grinning.

"Hey." Her Mom said, leading her down the street, grinning like her daughter. "Remember the last time we were here?" She asked and Jane smiled.

"My fifteenth birthday. We spent all day going from one tapas place to the next. I drank way too much alcohol because I forgot that with the heat I would become dehydrated faster." Her mom smiled at that.

"You couldn't even have the good food, either. You were still vegetarian. So, how about we recreate that day but with actual meat in our meals. And seafood!" She said with a grin which Jane returned.

"Sounds like a plan. But I'm off the drink." Her mom gave her a questioning look. "I'll explain later." She said and her mother nodded.

"You know, your disappearing act is a little too good, I think. I've had no solid news about the Normandy apart from your messages. Just some rumours here and there about merc bases that suddenly go silent and urban legends told about Shepard and Archangel appearing mysteriously out of nowhere and shutting down operations over night." Her mom smiled at her and Jane grinned.

"That was the plan." She reminded her and her mom nodded.

"I know. So, speaking of Archangel, where is your husband?" She asked and Jane smiled at the ease with which her mother was discussing him. She figured her mom was happy enough trusting her judgement and she was glad for it.

"His sister called and he had to take it. I've been meaning to talk to her myself, there's something I want to discuss but I needed to talk with you as well and you trump Sol on this one." She said and her mother regarded her carefully as they sat down outside at a small restaurant. She indicated to her daughter's black hoodie which contrasted her own summer dress and sunglasses.

"Aren't you a little warm?" She asked and Jane shook her head but her mom kept watching her carefully. "Are you okay, Jane? You look... tired." She said and Jane sighed, pulling out a data pad and passing it to her mom.

"There are my medical files." Her mom read the data pad, not understanding most of the medical jargon but understanding enough to get the gist.

"So, you're-"

"Yep." Jane cut her off. "I'm keeping it quiet for obvious reasons. Hence the disappearing act." Her mom smiled at her as she handed her back the data pad.

"But you're happy, right?" She asked and Jane nodded, holding back tears.

"Yeah. I just... I've been focusing on all of the unusual issues for so long the normal ones have only just hit home. Mom, I don't know what I'm supposed to do with a baby... I mean, I'm good with kids but this is different. What if... what if I fuck it up?" She asked and her mom shook her head, smiling.

"Oh, Jane. You always panic if you can't create a very clear and detailed idea of what to expect. You always need to predict the probabilities and figure out the optimum outcome using all of the available data. It's what makes you good on the battlefield but it won't help you here. You need to trust your own judgement because this is all new territory. No one can help you here. Sure, I know about human babies but turian ones? You've got good instincts but you need to trust them once in a while." Her mother said and Jane nodded.

"Thanks mom." She said, smiling as her mother shook her head.

"I'm barely into my fifties and you're already making me a grandmother." She joked and Jane laughed.

"Hey, I waited until I was in my thirties." She countered and her mother smiled.

"Now I know how my mom felt..."

* * *

Garrus didn't have to search far from the shuttle to find his bondmate, sitting outside with her mother. She had rolled her sleeves up but kept the hoodie on. She had always run cold for a human but she had been as sensitive to lower temperatures as he was in the last few months. She smiled as he approached to find her laughing. Her eyes lit up as she saw him.

"Garrus!" She cried out, grinning from ear to ear, as he sat down next to her. She rested her head on his cowl and he put his arm over her shoulder. She was tired, but happy. Her mother just beamed at the two of them, recognising how rare it was for her daughter to be that comfortable with anyone and she was simply glad that she had found him. Her earlier worries appeared to be unfounded and she was grateful for it. "Okay, here's a question; what are turian baby sleep patterns like?" Jane asked him and he frowned for a moment.

"They sleep a few more hours than grown turians. Why?" He asked and her mother was the one to answer.

"Human babies have a tendency to wake up in the middle of the night screaming. Jane here was a lucky exception." Jane kept grinning as he shook his head.

"No, nothing like that." Her mother smiled at that.

"Nothing is better than a baby that knows how to sleep properly." She said before glancing at her omni-tool. "As much as I would love to stay and chat with you two, I have to get going. How long are you two staying?" Jane frowned before speaking.

"We're leaving ASAP. I need to speak with Solana. You know, get some advice from a female turian." Her mom nodded at that but Garrus spoke up.

"Actually, Sol is going to meet us in a few minutes." He said and Shepard frowned.

"How come? I thought she was still on Palaven with your father." She said and he shook his head.

"Apparently she came here a few weeks ago to help rebuild the Citadel. They've got life support working in most of the Presidium so she's staying up there." He said and Jane frowned as her mother got up to leave.

"I'll see you two later, then." Her mom said as she walked away and Jane turned to her bondmate.

"Does that mean she's too busy to come with us?" She asked and was answered by a female voice behind them.

"Well, I wouldn't necessarily say that." Sol said as Jane spun around to see her, grinning at her sister-in-law.

"Sol!" She said enthusiastically as the female turian took the seat her mother had just left.

"Hey guys. You're... excitable." Sol said and Jane shrugged.

"Mood swings. Plus I've been cooped up on a ship and not allowed on missions. It's all been very boring and everyone is too busy with Cerberus to deal with me." She pouted a little and Sol laughed, before frowning and Jane realised that Garrus hadn't told his sister the news. Probably not wanting to say it over an unsecured channel.

"Why haven't you been allowed on missions?" Sol asked and Jane sighed.

"This might take some explaining..."


	58. Chapter 58

**Chapter 58**

"So, how's out rumour mill coming along?" Shepard asked Liara as she entered her office, the asari watching her worriedly.

"Shepard, you shouldn't be up and about. You know that both Solana and the doctor are worried about your lack of abdominal plating. You're supposed to be on bed rest." Jane sighed at that, rolling her eyes.

"The doc said a quick trip from the med-bay to your office would be fine. So, you didn't answer my question." Liara nodded, bringing up new data on her screens.

"We couldn't have asked for better results. I have spread several rumours along the lines of you went to an expensive clinic to have a child via a donor or you adopted a young orphan left without parents by the war. Hopefully it should be enough to prevent anyone from guessing at the truth even if they see either a pregnant you or you with a child." Shepard nodded, thoughtfully.

"I'm still not going to leave the ship until the baby comes. Not that Sol or the doc would let me anyway. But hopefully we should be safe." Liara nodded in agreement.

"Of course. I think we managed to get all of the weak points in the ship's security before any news could get out. Your help has been most appreciated." Shepard nodded again, sighing a little.

"Well. it's not as if I have anything else to do." She said and Liara nodded in understanding.

"Shepard you should go rest some more. We can't do anything more about this and we have done all we can with the Cerberus data until Miranda returns from chasing down her contacts." Shepard frowned at that.

"I _am_ resting, Liara. See? I'm nice and comfortable in this chair." Liara rolled her eyes at the stubborn human.

"Shepard, if you hurt yourself Garrus will be upset. Why don't you go and find him and he can keep you occupied." Shepard sighed once again before giving her friend a sympathetic smile.

"I'm sorry, Liara. I've never been good at sitting around doing nothing. And I don't want to pester Garrus right now..." She admitted and the asari raised an eyebrow.

"So, you're avoiding him?" She asked and Shepard shook her head.

"More like he's avoiding me. Okay, that was harsh. What I meant to say was that he's busy running the ship for me and I can't be distracting him." Liara nodded at that, understanding the reasoning.

"Can't you do something else? I thought you were organising safe houses." She said but Shepard shrugged.

"I was but I'm done now. Mostly. I've got my gran's place on Earth, Garrus's family home on Palaven, Wrex has set up a place for us on Tuchanka, and we're headed to Rannoch now to discuss using Tali's place as the last one. I still can't believe she and Reeger are building the house_ together_. I guess they spent more time with each other when I was locked up." Liara nodded at that.

"Kal'Reeger was assigned to the same ship as Tali while she was serving as an admiral, right up until the start of the Reaper war." Jane grinned at that, happy for her friend.

"Well, if she and Kal don't mind the occasional visit then that brings us up to four places plus the Normandy. It think that's enough safe places for my family to stay to avoid detection, don't you?" She asked, smiling and Liara nodded.

"I'm sorry, Shepard. I don't mean to sound like I don't want you in here but-"

"But you're the Shadow Broker and you're very busy. I know, I'm sorry." Shepard said, getting ready to get up when the door opened to reveal Garrus who immediately rolled his eyes at her.

"She hasn't been giving you too much hassle, has she Liara?" He asked and the asari grinned while Shepard pulled a face.

"Please take her away before I slap her with a stasis field." The asari joked as Shepard folded her arms.

"Gar-ru-us, she's being mean to me..." Jane complained, pouting a little.

"She started it!" The asari retorted playing along with the act. They both laughed when Garrus rolled his eyes again and his wife grinned at him as he moved over to her to help her up.

"It's fine, Garrus. I can still walk." She said stubbornly but he just shook his head.

"If you hurt yourself Sol and Chakwas will strap you to a bed in the med-bay." He warned and she sighed. He smiled, holding her close to him "You are, technically, supposed to be on bed rest." He pointed out and she sighed again, nodding.

"I know, but it's boring..." She told him as they headed out of the XO's office and past the elevator.

"How about we watch a vid in a while?" He asked and she smiled at him.

"Okay." She said before noticing that he was leading her towards the observation deck. "Where are we going?" She asked suspiciously and he failed to suppress a smile.

"I've got a surprise for you." He told her and she raised an eyebrow.

"Really? What?" She asked, causing him to sigh and shake his head.

"That kind of ruins the surprise, ani." He said and she pouted a little, jokingly. As much as she complained about being bored, she had been the happiest he had ever seen her in the last few months. He lead her to the observation deck and she gave him a questioning look as he opened the door. The room had been empty since Miranda and Oriana had left to track down the last of Miranda's Cerberus contacts.

She peered into the room curiously as he opened the door and gasped as she found that she didn't recognise an inch of it. The entire room had been rearranged to make room for a cot and children's toys. She grinned at the idea of her child growing up so close to the stars.

"It's wonderful, Garrus! Is this why you've been too busy?" She asked and he shrugged.

"A little. I had a lot of help. Do you really like it?" He asked and she grinned in response before frowning a little.

"It's great but... I don't know, is it too far away from our quarters?" She asked and he laughed a little pointing out the bed in the corner of the room. It was smaller than the one they usually slept in but it was big enough for both of them.

"Obviously it's not meant for permanent use but I figured that between EDI and a full crew on board it won't exactly be an issue." He pointed out and she smiled in response,nodding as she made her way over to the bookshelf and brushed her fingers across the spine of a thick, green book.

"Garrus, where did you get this?" She asked softly as she carefully removed the heavy book from the shelf, grinning as she opened it.

"Your gran gave it to me when we visited Earth. What is it?" He asked and she grinned.

"It's a collection of short stories and poems by A. A. Milne. My dad used to read them to me all the time when I was a kid..." She told him, her voice still soft as he moved to hold her close to him. That was when EDI interrupted.

"Commander, a shuttle is approaching this system. It is emitting an emergency distress signal. I believe that Miss Lawson is aboard."

* * *

**AN: Been a lot of fluff in the last few chapters... I'm not sure whether that's a good thing or not. Regardless, this story is coming to an end and there are only two more chapters left to go! I really hope that you've enjoyed reading and thanks for it! Special thanks to everyone who has favourited and followed and reviewed. :D**


	59. Chapter 59

**Chapter 59**

Shepard sat silently in the med-bay, anxious to help but knowing that she could do nothing. She settled for silently observing as Miranda was brought on board, unconscious and covered in plasma burns. Shepard watched as Chakwas did what she could for the former Cerberus operative, who was struggling to cling to life. She wondered where Oriana was and if she was safe. She hoped that she hadn't been on board with Miranda when she had been hit but figured that she would have been alerted if they had found a body. Unless, of course, there was no body to find because she had been captured. That wasn't something Shepard wanted to think about, although she couldn't deny the possibility. The alternative was that Miranda had left her sister behind because she knew that the mission would be dangerous, which confused Shepard even more. Miranda was only supposed to be contacting old friends and gathering intel, nothing high risk enough to end up like this. Garrus came into the room and sat next to her, remaining silent as he felt the gears in her mind turning; trying to figure out what had happened. She didn't say anything until Liara came into the room.

"Have you found anything?" She asked and the asari nodded.

"Yes. From the look of the shuttle, Miranda was on her own. Most of her systems were overloaded by whoever attacked her but I was able to retrieve enough data to piece together why she was coming to find us. To find you. She was coming with a warning. One of her contacts knew of the Hybrid cell and managed to gain access to their systems. What he saw didn't make sense to him but Miranda knew enough to figure it out. They _know_, Shepard. I don't know how but they do. It is logical to predict an attack against the Normandy. And soon." Shepard swore under her breath and her biotics flared a little. They weren't as powerful as normal but they were still stable, showing Garrus just how pissed off his wife really was.

"Liara, do you have coordinates for their base?" She asked and her friend nodded. Garrus turned to his bondmate and growled a little as he realised where her mind was headed.

"Jane, there is no way you can go after them in your current condition. Not unless you want to have the baby in the middle of a fire-fight." He warned as he saw the fire in her eyes. "You have to let me handle it." He told her and she took a deep breath, nodding.

"I know, Garrus. But this isn't like normal. No mercy. We need to send them a message: 'No one fucks with my family'." Garrus nodded, a growl escaping from his throat to agree with her. Being bonded to Shepard meant that he very rarely got to indulge his instincts to defend and protect her (often it was the other way around) but these Cerberus bastards were going to find out what a pissed off turian could really do when someone threatened his family.

* * *

Shepard sat in the war room with her crew as they ironed out their plan of attack on the Cerberus base. She had considered getting rid of it or replacing it with a standard briefing room so that she could have the lab back since there was really no need for most of the equipment since the end of the Reaper war. But she supposed that it would have to do for now.

The Normandy had arrived in the system and the stealth systems were engaged. They had taken a few covert scans of the base and were now trying to formulate a plan of attack. Shepard was still fuming over the fact that she couldn't be the one to blow the bastards to hell. She trusted Garrus to get the job done but she desperately wanted to be the one pulling the trigger, even if she knew it wasn't possible. Hell, she couldn't even stand in order to stare down her crew as she spoke to them. Not that it was necessary, her current demeanour had everyone more than a little scared of what she would do if she got her hands on anyone who threatened to hurt her family. And most of the crew shared her attitude. None of them were going to let Cerberus take from them the baby that already had a place in the hearts of every crew member, every member of Shepard's patchwork family.

After several hours they finally refined their plan and her crew stood ready. Shepard regarded them all, seeing that their faces mirrored her own expression of rage and determination and, for a moment, she felt sorry for the bastards that would be on the receiving end of their anger.

"Cerberus needs to be brought down. Everyone in this room has agreed on that since we destroyed the Collector base. We would have hunted them down and put a stop to their sick experiments regardless but they had no idea what they were getting themselves into when they made this personal. Let's show them." Her biotics flickered a little as she spoke and every crew member nodded. When she finished they all coked their guns or flared their biotics to show support as they prepared to move out.

* * *

Solana and Garrus moved quickly and quietly, eliminating the outer patrols to allow Jack's squad of biotic students access. As the last guard fell Sol turned to her brother.

"Should we move to assist the biotic squad?" She asked and he shook his head.

"No, trust me when I say that you don't want to be anywhere that may even look as if you're between Jack and Cerberus. She owes a lot to Shepard and thinks of her like an older sister. She knows _exactly_ what Cerberus will do if they get their hands on the baby and I think it's safe to say that she won't hold back to stop them." Solana nodded, noting Garrus's cold tone. This truly was Archangel and she wondered if whatever damage Jack and her biotic students would unleash could compare to what Garrus would do to them once they moved in.

"I'm alerting Feron that Jack is starting her distraction." She told him and Garrus nodded. Jack was going to destroy the base, sure, but that would take time. Time Cerberus could use to transmit any data they have or wipe their records of any other bases. Feron was in charge of stopping that from happening.

"Go ahead, then we'll do another sweep before joining up with Jack. By that point he should be finished."

* * *

"_My team and I are headed in now. These fuckers won't know what hit 'em._" Shepard heard Jack's voice over the comm as she sat in the war room, making sure that the mission went as planned. She was incorporating some of the new data she was getting into her analyses when the door opened to reveal a familiar figure.

"Miranda? How are you conscious?" She asked as the woman limped her way over. She was still covered in burns but she was conscious and moving.

"Advanced healing, remember?" Miranda said, smiling as she sat down next to Shepard.

"You still shouldn't be up." Shepard told her and the dark haired woman smirked.

"Neither should you." She pointed out and Shepard shrugged.

"Point taken. Don't suppose you have any extra information on the base?" She asked and Miranda shook her head.

"No. Nothing that your scans haven't already detected." She said and Shepard nodded as she went back to listening to the radio chatter.

"_I have erased the main computer and have taken as much data as I could but they've got me trapped down here._" Feron's voice came over the speaker and Shepard cursed under her breath, feeling helpless once again.

"_We're on our way._" Her bondmate's voice answered and Shepard frowned with worry as Miranda placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Shepard, maybe you shouldn't be listening to this. You're stressing yourself out." She said and Shepard laughed under her breath, the sound hollow, as she prepared to tell Miranda that she would stress no matter what. However, she was stopped in her tracks and a look of shock flashed across her face, quickly followed by a look of pure irritation and disbelief. "What is it?" Miranda asked and Shepard rolled her eyes before groaning with pain.

"I don't believe this shit but... my water just broke."

* * *

Solana and Garrus had not joined Jack and her squad, instead moving on their own to get to Feron while Jack kept the majority of the Cerberus troops busy. Garrus was just lining up a shot when his legs gave out from under him with shock. Sol shot him a worried look as he tried to contact the Normandy.

"Shepard, are you okay? Jane, are you there?" He asked and was answered by silence for a few moments before EDI replied.

"Commander Shepard is fine." She answered but Garrus growled in response, knowing that the AI was bullshitting him.

"EDI, tell me what happened _**now**_." He growled and Solana sighed before chiming in.

"You'd better tell him or he won't be able to concentrate and I really need his attention on these Guardians right now." She said and they were greeted by silence for another few moments.

"Shepard has gone into labour." Was the reply and Solana groaned. She needed Garrus's mind on the battle, not on his bondmate and child.

"Garrus, come on. The faster we deal with these guys, the faster we get back to the ship." His sister told him and he nodded, knowing that she was right.

"Let's finish these bastards." He growled as he shot down the last Cerberus trooper and Feron reappeared.

"I have set the base's self destruct sequence." The drell told them, hurrying past them and indicating that they should follow. "We may want to hurry." He said and the two turians ran after him.

"Jack, you and your students need to get out of here before this place blows." Solana shouted into her comm.

"Already on it!" Came the response as they ran from the base, barely making it clear before they were knocked down by the explosion. Sol picked her brother up from where he had fallen and her sub-harmonics trilled in understanding at the desperation on his face.

"Come on, big brother. Let's get you home."


	60. Chapter 60

**Chapter 60**

"_Cortez, I need an ETA on your arrival._" Miranda's voice called over the comm of the shuttle, clearly strained.

"We'll be five minutes." He replied.

"_Good. As soon as you arrive I need Jack to come straight to the med-bay._" Garrus was pulled out of his bondmate's pain for a moment as Jack looked concerned.

"Why the f- hell do you need me?!" She cried at the comm and a burst of static sounded before Miranda's voice returned.

"_There have been... complications. We need to sedate Shepard but right now her biotics are flaring like crazy and Liara and I aren't strong enough to get through them._" Jack frowned at that.

"No way is Shepard powerful enough to keep both you and the asari out. I've seen her fight. She's good but she's not that good." She said but Garrus shook his head, finally contributing.

"She always reigns herself in. She is conscious of not wanting to hurt those that she is trying to protect and keeps her power levels low enough to avoid unnecessary damage. Even she doesn't know how powerful she would be if she ever lost control." He said and Jack looked at him with wide eyes.

"You mean when she goes all biotic warrior on people she's _reigning herself in_?!" Jack exclaimed and Garrus nodded.

"She came close to losing control once, the second time she used her biotics, but she never fully gave in. She single-handedly killed over a hundred heavily armed men." He told her and Jack just nodded, understanding. If Shepard wasn't as quiet and reserved as she was, none of them wanted to think about how much power she would wield. They returned to silence and as soon as they landed everyone headed for the med-bay. Jack was allowed in but everyone else was kept back. Garrus answered EDI's attempt to keep him out with a growl.

"I'm sorry Garrus but the doctors need to operate. Your presence will only hinder their work." She told him and he frowned.

"EDI, what's going on?" He asked, frowning as he couldn't read the mech's face. It was extremely frustrating and he didn't understand how EDI was one of the people his wife understood the most.

"Shepard's body was not designed to deliver a turian baby. It was suspected that a natural birth would not be possible but her biotics have... complicated matters. Jack is holding her biotic energy at bay while the doctors operate." Garrus nodded remembering countless conversations with Doctor Chakwas about how to go about delivering the baby and any problems that might occur. In hind sight it was obvious, but at the time none of them had considered the possibility of Shepard's biotics going haywire. Especially given the fact that they had been all but non-existent over the last nine months.

"EDI, her biotics went off line because her body couldn't spare the energy. Is she... how..." He struggled to phrase what he wanted to say and EDI placed her hand on his arm.

"Shepard's body is under a lot of stress. We cannot be certain of how long she will be able to keep up this level of energy output." She said sympathetically and his sub-harmonics rang out with pain. Sol moved to his side to comfort him but his mind was elsewhere. It was concentrating on his bond with Jane, trying to send her as much of his energy and strength as he could to pull her through.

* * *

Solana waited patiently beside her brother, making sure that no one disturbed him. He hadn't moved in over an hour and she was sure that he was with his bondmate, trying to make sure she came out alive. Eventually Doctor Chakwas left the med-bay and Sol wondered if everything was alright.

"She's... she's still breathing and her heart is still beating but that's all I can say. I'm not even sure how. Her cybernetics are rebooting but it's taking time. Time she may not have. She's still out but I think having Garrus close will help thanks to whatever bond it is they have." Sol nodded and wondered if her brother had heard but the subtle change in his sub-harmonics to an even greater sound of distress told her that he was still listening.

"What about the baby?" Sol asked and the doctor smiled.

"She's going to be fine." She said and Garrus's head snapped upwards in response.

"She?" He asked quietly and the doctor's smile widened a little.

"Yes, Garrus. Congratulations, you're the father to a healthy baby girl but right now your wife needs you." She told him and he nodded silently in response, getting up to enter the med-bay. What he saw shocked him. His bondmate, the love of his life, lying pale and grey on a blood soaked medical bed. He felt as if his heart was being ripped from his chest as she struggled to hold on to life and he collapsed beside her. He knew that he probably mixed up the words and he was butchering the pronunciation but he didn't care, he spoke Human Common as he whispered in her ear.

"_Come back to me, my love. I need you. I can't do this alone. Our daughter needs you. She needs you for all of the times I mess up as a dad and need you to cover for me. All those difficult conversations about boys and things. She needs her mother and I need my wife. So come back to us, my heart, please... just come back._" He said, not really expecting an answer as his head rested on his hand which held her own so tight.

And then, ever so softly that he might have missed it, she squeezed back.

"Don't worry, ani. You can't get rid of me that easily." She told him quietly, a grin painted across her pale face, colour returning slowly but surely. Her voice was small and she was shaking with the effort but every second she seemed to grow visibly stronger. He breathed a sigh of relief.

"Jane..." He breathed and she laughed a little, her grin widening.

"My cybernetics just needed to reboot. They're back to full power now and my biotics are back so they're also giving a helping hand." She said, still grinning as he stared at her with disbelief. At that moment he very much believed that _nothing _could kill this woman. She laughed a little at the thought as if he had said it aloud.

"Well, maybe not _nothing_ but I am pretty tough to kill. You should know that by now, ani." She said, purposefully using the term to reinforce in his mind that she was back. "Now, I believe you said something about a daughter." She said, still grinning but he could see her biting her lip as they both wondered just what she would look like. As if knowing what they were about to ask Chakwas was already approaching with a small bundle, placing it in Shepard's arms. She looked down at it and his sub-harmonics instantly responded to the look of pure adoration and love on her face as she gasped softly.

"Garrus..." She said softly as he moved over to see his daughter, his heart swelling with pride as he looked at the small child in his wife's arms, her brilliant blue eyes copies of his own, the same dark skin where humans would normally have pink around the eyes, although the same shape as a human's. "She has your eyes." Jane said, grinning as he continued to look at the way turian and human physiology had meshed to create a child that obviously had a turian muscle structure and a few plates in places but all covered by very human skin, the same golden colour as his wife's. Her head was covered by tufts of golden hair, although her forehead showed a similar shape to the shorter fringes of female turians. She smiled at them, revealing a mouth full of small teeth similar to those of humans but a little more pointed and Jane gasped a little. "She already has teeth... like a little turian." She said at Garrus, giving him a grin that he returned.

"Though, they are smaller like a human's." He pointed out and she smiled as their daughter raised her hand to him and he kept grinning as he let her grasp a finger. "Five digits." He pointed out and his wife smiled before biting her lip again.

"I guess we never did settle on a name..." She said and he lowered his forehead to hers.

"I kind of liked the two that you said before the mission." He said and she smiled.

"Sarah and Angel?" She asked and he nodded a little. "But which one?" She asked and he kept grinning.

"Well, Angel would make a fine addition to Shepard and Archangel but I think Sarah would be better for Jane and Garrus." He told her and she smiled.

"She gets a crime-fighting nickname too?" She joked and he grinned.

"Shepard, it's _our_ daughter. There's no way she isn't going to kick ass one way or another." He said and she smiled, turning back to the baby in her arms.

"Hey there Sarah 'Angel' Shepard-Vakarian. Welcome to the Normandy. Welcome home..."

**The End**

**... For Now**

* * *

**AN: Hey! It's the end of the story but never fear; a sequel is on the way! Finding Me will follow on from this story and the first chapter should be posted in the next few days along with the start of a series of one-shots surrounding the characters of the two stories in the events that aren't shown in the stories themselves (back story and the like).**

**Thanks again to everyone for reading and double super special thanks to everyone who took the time to follow, favourite and review. You guys all rock! Thank you so much.**

**Hope you enjoyed and thanks again!**


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